Let Go
by Peppermint Stick
Summary: AU TRORY. Tristan's finally back, but he and Rory can't be together or else he's back in Military School. Not to mention that Rory isn't exactly single and his parents are playing match maker with someone else. Hmmm.....whatever will they do?
1. Girls and Boys

A/N: Lorelai and Chris have been married since they were eighteen. Rory was born when Lorelai was sixteen and she has a twin brother, Blake. After they graduated Lorelai and Chris moved to Stars Hollow so that their kids could live away from society, but still be close enough to their grandparents. They live the life of people in society (wealthy, mansion, ect.) but just in Stars Hollow. When Rory and Blake were three Lorelai had another son, Shane. They have gone to Stars Hollow public schools their whole life and are best friends with Jess and Lane. The older Gilmores want the twins to start Chilton their Sophomore year.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls or 'Girls and Boys'   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Educated with money  
  
He's well dressed, not funny  
  
And not much to say in most conversations  
  
But he'll put the bill in all situations  
  
'Cause he pays for everything  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rory Hayden rolled over, still half asleep, and heard her alarm clock go off. Annoyed by the high buzzing noise, she hit it, trying to find the off button, but ended up leaning over too far and falling out of the bed. Now she was fully awake and lying on the floor in a heap of blankets and pillows with the alarm still going off. Shaking her head, Rory stood up and finally found the off button.   
  
Looking around she remembered something, Chilton. "BLAKE!" she screamed, running from her room on the third story to his across the hall. She pushed his door open and jumped in his bed. He rolled over, awake but ignoring her. She poked him in the arm, "Blake." he scooted farther away, "Blake." she poked him in the side, he still didn't move. "Blake!" he twitched, but nothing else, she sighed and pushed him off the bed. He hit the floor with a huge 'bang!' and his sister laughed.  
  
"Shit Rory! I think you broke my arm!"  
  
"Oh, don't be such a drama queen."  
  
He smiled, "I like being a drama queen, it makes me feel pretty."  
  
"I'm the prettiest twin."  
  
"You wish."  
  
"Nope, I know."  
  
"Miss Rory, Mister Blake, your uniforms for school will be on the beds when you come back from breakfast."  
  
"Thanks Angie." the head maid nodded and walked away.  
  
"I'll race you down stairs."  
  
"I'll win."  
  
"You wish."  
  
"No, I know."  
  
"Fine, GO!" they jumped off the bed and sprinted down the hall.  
  
KITCHEN  
  
Chris was reading some paper for work and Lorelai was pacing in front of the coffee maker dramatically, waiting for it to produce enough coffee. Without looking up he asked, "Where are the twins?" a few seconds later there was a loud 'crash!' as Blake tackled his sister and they crashed into a wall upstairs. Neither parent even flinched, "Oh."  
  
The teenagers ran into the room, panting from the contact with a solid wall. "Rory won!"  
  
"No she didn't."  
  
"Yes she did."  
  
"Lore, I watched them just like you, Blake won."  
  
"Chris, the girl always wins, remember that."  
  
"Hey! Mom, that's not fair!"  
  
"Deal with it." Rory said, Blake stuck his tongue out at   
  
her. "I will always win because I am the prettier twin."  
  
"No, you're just jealous."  
  
"Ha. Never."  
  
"Denial, my friend, is not just a river in Egypt."  
  
"Really?" asked Lane as she and Jess walked into the kitchen, "There's another place called The Nile?"  
  
The other people in the room stared at her, "Are you seriously asking that question?" Blake asked her.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Yeah Kim, there's another river called The Nile." Jess answered sarcastically.  
  
"Really?"  
  
He narrowed his eyes, "No, not really."  
  
"Well, we know who the blond of the group is."  
  
"I'm Korean."  
  
"Yeah, besides, we've always known Lane was an airhead."  
  
"Oh, that's nice, love you too, Rory."  
  
She smiled and walked to the fridge. "What is my little sister doing?" Blake asked.  
  
"I'm only younger by six minuets!"  
  
"Hey, older is older. Jello?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You're eating Jello for breakfast?" Jess asked.  
  
"Obviously." she handed him a spoon.  
  
"Oh, I see how it is. Me and Blake aren't loved, is that it?"  
  
"Yes. And you two don't like Strawberry anyway."  
  
"It's strawberry?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Blake walked to the fridge and got out another bowl, handing Lane a spoon and keeping one for himself, "Cherry."  
  
"I like cherry."  
  
"Yes, I know this, it's why I gave you a spoon."  
  
"Ooooh."  
  
The coffee maker beeped and both twins jumped up, racing their mother to the counter.  
  
CAR  
  
"Tell me one more time why we transferred to Chilton six weeks AFTER school started."   
  
"Well my darling daughter, your father and I put things off constantly." she looked at the two in the mirror.  
  
"Yes, I know."  
  
"And, well, we forgot about the application until two weeks ago."  
  
"Nice."  
  
"Yes, we thought so too. Now, when you take over the school and make all the Freshmen bow down before you, it will be more dramatic, because you came in late."  
  
"Why do we want the Freshmen to bow down before us?"  
  
"You're older. Besides, you are the children of the legends Christopher Hayden and Lorelai Gilmore. It's your right to protect the Hayden title and take over the school."  
  
"But mom, we hate Hartford kids, they're annoying and spoiled."  
  
"Yes, well my darlings, complain to your grandparents, not your wonderful parents. It wasn't our idea." she pulled into the parking lot and turned to them, "Have fun, and Blake, please don't get in a fight."  
  
"I don't get in fights."  
  
"You were suspended three timed last semester for fighting."  
  
"Well, I didn't start them."  
  
"That's nice, have fun. You have to talk to the headmaster."  
  
"You're not coming in?"  
  
"Ror, look at me. I can't talk to anyone in there looking like this."   
  
The twins looked over her outfit, pink tye dyed shirt and all, "Mom, you have thousands of dollars worth of clothes, you couldn't find anything else to wear?"  
  
"This was the only thing that was clean!"  
  
Blake rolled his eyes, "Mom, the maids wash about six lodes of clothes a day, how could that possibly be the only clean thing you have?"  
  
"Don't ask me, now go, you don't want to be late."  
  
"Right, bye mom." they said in unison.  
  
"Goodbye my babies, I will see you at three thirty."   
  
They climbed out of the car and walked into the building, where there were numerous couples making out. Some were on the hoods of cars, other leaning against walls. Some girls were throwing themselves at guys, batting their eyebrows, skirts hiked up and tight or undone blouses. They might as well have had 'Gold Digger' across their foreheads in bright red.   
  
"Wow."  
  
"You can say that again."  
  
"Wow." Rory rolled her eyes and looked at him.  
  
"I was being sarcastic."  
  
"I wasn't."  
  
A teacher walked by, "Um, excuse me."  
  
He turned at her voice, "What can I do for you Miss..." he trailed off.  
  
"Hayden."  
  
"Miss Hayden. What can I do for you?"  
  
"Could you tell us where the headmaster's office is?"   
  
"Certainly, you go to the Anderson building and it is the fifth door on the left."  
  
"Okay, thanks."  
  
"No problem." he walked away and left the confused teenagers standing in the busy hall.  
  
"Um, which one is the Anderson building?"  
  
"This way, I saw it when we came in."  
  
HEADMASTER'S OFFICE  
  
"Mister and Miss Hayden." the old man said as they sat in the chairs in front of his desk, "Children of Christopher and Lorelai Hayden. Two of the best students to ever enter our doors. I hope that the two of you will prove similar."  
  
Rory nodded, "So do we sir, so do we."  
  
The man nodded, not catching her sarcasm, and continued, "And by the looks of your grades, you seem quite capable of it. Of course, you must understand that Chilton will be much more difficult than your other school, Stars Harlem."  
  
"Hollow."  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"You said Stars Harlem, it's Stars Hollow...sir." she added as an after thought.   
  
He nodded, "Right, Stars Hollow, anyway, here are your schedules, books, and locker numbers." he handed them the papers, "And I should warn you, not all succeed. Given how late you two have started, you may not succeed. If you are not completely dedicated, you are likely fail here at Chilton. Remember that."  
  
They looked at him, wide eyed, was that a threat or a warning? Blake recovered first, "Um, thank you sir, we will." They left the office as quickly as possible.  
  
"Well, that was pleasant." Rory said sarcastically, "He practically told us that we would fail. Real nice administrator."  
  
"What's you locker number?" Blake asked, looking at the papers in his hand.  
  
"Um, 2947. You?"  
  
"4053."  
  
"So, I'll see you in, wow, first, third, lunch, sixth and eighth." she said, looking at their schedules.  
  
"Later Ror."  
  
"Bye Blake."  
  
She walked slowly down the hall, looking for the right number as Blake rounded the corner.  
  
He walked down the crowded straight, scanning the top lockers, which had the odd numbers, even on bottom. "4045, 4047, 4049, 4051, 4053," he stopped and spun the combination, taking the books out of his bag and relocating them to the locker. Half way through, he heard three guys talking next to him.  
  
"I dunno, Summer is hott, but have you seen that new girl? Rory, I think. Damn, blue eye, pale, thin, but a GREAT body. Shit, I wanted to do something naughty right when I saw her, I bet she has a boyfriend though." Blake's blood pressure rose.  
  
"Turner, I saw her too, and she's way out of your league. I heard she's a Hayden. Ever heard the stories of Lorelai Gilmore?"  
  
"Who hasn't heard if her and Chris Hayden, the original king and queen of Chilton?"   
  
"Yeah, wild women, but bad ass guys who'll kill you for looking at them. I heard she had a brother, I'd be careful."  
  
"I don't give a shit. She's probably wild in bed. Hey, you, new kid or whatever, I've never seen you before. What's your name?"  
  
"Blake."  
  
"Right, Blake, have you seen the new girl?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"What do you think? Looking at me, how long will it take for me to tame her?"  
  
"Damn, I hate Hartford kids." was Blake's answer. That is, until his fist flew to the boy's face.   
  
"SHIT!" he swung at Blake, hitting his square in the jaw, and the fight began.   
  
Tristan was talking to Landon White when he heard Nathan Turner yell a few yards down the crowded hall, but ignored it, some chick had probably kicked him in the balls for being a jackass. And he deserved it, being the major pain in the ass that he was, Tristan hated him. But when he and Landon heard the sounds of a fight, they went to see what was happening.  
  
He was amused by the sight before him. Turner and someone he didn't recognize were in a major fight, attracting quite a crowd. The other guy was winning, but it didn't sit with Tristan when Cole Jones, one of Turner's cronies, began to walk into the ring. Two against one? That just wasn't fair. Most people at Chilton frowned upon the new kids, and found it funny when one got in a fight. Most of the time, Tristan figured that if someone got in a fight, they either deserved it, or had started it, either way, it was their job to finish it. But an unfair fight? That just wasn't right. What gave him even more of a reason to interfere was the fact that it would be two of his enemies he was fighting, so everyone wins.  
  
He dropped his bag and stepped in after the boy, Cole was behind the new guy, ready to hit him in the back, when Tristan tapped his shoulder and he turned. His eyes were wide and his jaw dropped, not the best thing to do, seeing as how Tristan's fist met his jaw with a loud 'bang!' it wouldn't break it, but he would have trouble eating for a few hours. Jones reeled in pain, but got his footing back and struck Tristan, hitting him in the chin. He cracked his jaw and smirked before his fist landed in Cole Jones' stomach.  
  
Blake had just been hit in the nose. Nathan hadn't been very lucky with the shot, so it wasn't too hard, but it made him bleed from his right nostril. But he got revenge as his balled fist made contact with the side of Turner's mouth. This was nothing compared to some of the fights he and Jess had been in. Once he broke a kid's nose, Jess had before too, but neither of them had ever gotten injured badly. A few moments ago, he'd noticed out of the corner of his eye, one of the guy's friends get punched by a blond guy. It didn't take a genius to figure out that the guy was helping him, and he needed to figure out who he was.  
  
"All right, break it up, break it up!" a teacher said loudly. When that didn't work, four male administrators came out, one grabbing each of the boys' arms and breaking them apart. They stared daggers at each other as they were let to the principal's office.  
  
Rory was walking around blindly, trying to figure out where Blake was when she heard two girls talking excitedly.   
  
"Yeah, and then Tristan jumped in when Cole went after the guy."  
  
"Nathan and Cole are idiots. Who threw the first punch, Louise?"  
  
"The new guy, what's hid name? Blake? He was really hott too. But watching him AND Tristan, I thought I'd die of happiness."  
  
"Did they get sent to the principal's office?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Why did they start fighting anyway?"  
  
"Nathan said something about some girl. Blake's sister or girlfriend or something. Anyway, have you seen Travis Holdren's new car? I think I might do something to get a ride in it."  
  
Rory's eyes widened and she cursed under her breath, ten minuets! They'd been here ten minuets and he'd already gotten in a fight! Over her. She had to admit, even though he'd been sent to the office, it felt good to have her brother fight for her. And who was Tristan? She asked herself as she ended up in the Anderson building.   
  
They were let out of the office with three days of detention and a warning that if they fought again they would be suspended. "You're lucky those teachers came out and saved your asses." Cole said to the other two.  
  
"What the fuck Turner? Go look in a mirror, even though they broke it up, we beat the shit out of you two!" And it was true, they'd definitely come out on the bad end of the fight. Blake had a bloody nose, but that was all. Tristan had a bruise on his cheek. But Turner would have a black eye, he had a split lip, and his nose was bleeding heavily. Jones had a huge bruise on the side of his face and was bleeding in his mouth from where he'd bitten his tounge while Tristan punched him.   
  
"Whatever Dugrey, and what the hell, what's your name? Blake. Why did you jump me like that, you jackass?"  
  
"You know how you three were talking about the Haydens? The 'wild women and bad ass guys who'll kill you if you look at the women'?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Yeah, well, you just got your ass kicked by one of the 'bad ass Haydens'."  
  
Tristan laughed as Turner's eyes widened in shock and he paled.  
  
"Yeah, talk about my sister again, and you'll be lucky to walk away without going to the hospital. You're a lucky son of a bitch. Once my friends and I broke a guy's jaw for talking about her and another one of our friends. So you better watch your mouth, Turner." After that, the two other boys walked away quickly, terrified that they now has a Dugrey and a Hayden against them.  
  
Blake turned to Tristan, "So, I'm Blake Hayden. You're?"   
  
"Tristan Dugrey." they shook hands.  
  
"So um, why did you help be back there? It's not like you know me or anything."  
  
"I'm not usually one to interfere in a fight, but Jones was coming up to you from behind, and that's just wrong."  
  
"Well, thanks, I would have the shit beaten out of me if it wasn't for you."  
  
"No problem. Judging by the way you handled Turner, you could have taken both if he'd come from the front."  
  
They walked in comfortable silence for a while before Blake said, "So, what's it like?"  
  
"What's what like?"  
  
"Growing up in society."  
  
"Fine, I guess. Not many real friends, but the few true ones last forever. What's it like growing up away from society?"  
  
"Nice. Quiet, at least in the town where I live. Very small. A lot of good friends."  
  
"So, that little love fest started because of your sister?"  
  
"Yeah, he was talking about her and I got pissed."  
  
Tristan laughed, "I give you props, man. You're the new guy and you beat the shit out of a popular for something you believed in. You have my respect."  
  
"You've got my respect too. You helped me when you didn't even know me. You just knew that it wasn't a fair fight. I give you props."  
  
They came around a corner where Rory was, "BLAKE! My favorite twin brother in the whole wide world!"   
  
she said, hugging him.  
  
"I'm your only twin brother."  
  
"True. But still, you're my favorite."  
  
"Well thank you."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
Tristan stared in awe at the girl in front of him. She was definitely good looking. He could see why Turner wanted her. She had the 'untouchable' look down pat. The whole, unknowingly seductive vibe radiated from her. But she still had a strange innocence about her, as if she'd never been kissed.  
  
"Tristan, this is my little sister,"  
  
"By six minuets." she interrupted.  
  
"My little sister by seven,"  
  
"Six!"  
  
"By six minuets, Lorelai Hayden, Rory for short. Ror, this is Tristan Dugrey, he's the reason I'm currently breathing."  
  
"Well, thanks for being the reason my brother is currently breathing." she said, holding out her hand.  
  
He took it and kissed between base and middle nuckles, "My pleasure, Mary."  
  
She looked at him strangely, "Rory."  
  
"Mary."  
  
"Why Mary?"  
  
"You look like a Mary."  
  
"Right." she tried to pull her hand away, but he kept his hold on it. "I need that back."  
  
"Can't I keep it for a little while?"  
  
"I would really appreciate it if I got it back now."  
  
"Well that's no fun Mary." but he let go anyway.  
  
"Rory."  
  
"Mary."  
  
"Rory."  
  
"Mary."  
  
"Class, unless we want another detention." Blake reminded them.  
  
"Right, class. Fun." Rory said dully.  
  
"It will be with me there." Tristan said, flashing his perfect smile.  
  
Rory groaned, "Yeah, right."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
And all of these boy and all of these girls  
  
Are losing their souls in a material world  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
A/N: So what did you think? Did you like it? Review and tell me. 


	2. Dilemma, Part One: Rory

A/N: The song in my first chapter was 'Girls and Boys' by Good Charlotte.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
No matter what I do  
  
All I think about is you  
  
Even when I'm with my Boo  
  
Boy, you know I'm crazy over you  
  
No matter what I do  
  
All I do is think about you  
  
Even when I'm with my Boo  
  
You know I'm crazy over you  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Tristan, Blake, and Rory were sitting at a lunch table a few days later when an angry looking blond stormed over, "TRISTAN DUGREY!"   
  
"Hey Paris," he said without even looking up, "How are you this fine morning?"  
  
"Don't give me that! You never turned in your half of the report to Mr. Remmy."  
  
He pulled a folder out of his bag and handed it to the girl, "You mean this?"  
  
She snatched it from him and looked through it, "Good, at least you did it right."  
  
"Your confidence in me is humbling."  
  
"See if I ever choose to be your partner again just because we're friends. I'll just let you fail next time."  
  
"I did it, didn't I?"  
  
"Yeah, last period."  
  
"Hey, it got done."  
  
"If it isn't at least a B, you're dead Dugrey, you hear me? Dead!" she left the same way she came.  
  
"Love you too, Paris!" he called after her. She just waved a hand as if telling him to shut up.  
  
"Well, she's lovely." Blake said.  
  
Tristan laughed, "You'll get used to her." Two girls walked over to their table and sat down.  
  
"Did we just see Paris storm out of here?" asked the blond.  
  
"Yup."  
  
"What did you do?"  
  
"Why do you always think it was my fault?"  
  
"Because you're you." the other one, with dark hair, said casually.  
  
"Gee, thanks Madeline, I feel loved."  
  
"Good."  
  
Rory looked at Blake and then did a double take, he was starring at Madeline, practically drooling. She kicked him under the table and he came out of a trance, shaking his head slightly. "Oh yeah, guys, these girls are Madeline Lynn," he said, pointing to the one with dark hair, "And Louise Grant." he motioned to the other, "The girl who came in earlier is Paris Gellar." Tristan looked at the girls, "You two, this is Blake Hayden and his twin sister, Rory." they nodded to each other as Paris came back in.  
  
She sat at their table and said in relief, "Mr. Remmy said that even though we were partners, I won't get any points knocked off because of your idiocy."  
  
"Thanks." he said sarcastically.  
  
"Don't worry Tristan, we still love you." Louise said sympathetically.  
  
"So, Maddy, How's it going with Patrick?"  
  
"We're talking."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"They're not a couple, but they're more than friends." Rory said.  
  
"Really? That's what talking means?"  
  
"God, guys are dumb."  
  
"Amen." Louse said, smiling at Rory. "I like her."  
  
The bell rang and they all stood up.   
  
"I'll see you guys later. It was good to meet you Rory you too, Blake." Louise said, walking away with Madeline behind her.  
  
"Bye Rory, Blake." Madeline said, following her friend.  
  
"What do you three have?" Paris asked.  
  
"Um, Petty." Blake said, looking at his schedule.  
  
"Me too, what do you have Rory?"  
  
"Wilson."  
  
Tristan smirked and wrapped an arm around her waist, her stomach flipped slightly, "We have the same class Mary. Are you stalking me?"  
  
"No, it's Rory," she said, removing his arm, "And I have a boyfriend."  
  
Tristan put his arm back, "You know you want me, Mary suits you better, and not for long."  
  
"Is that a threat?" she asked, turning to him.  
  
"Nope, it's a promise." he pushed her forward before she could say anything else. She staggered slightly, and he tightened his grip, putting his other arm on her stomach to steady her. "Are you all right?"  
  
"Um, yeah. I'm fine, thanks." But what confused her was that, when Dean first started putting his arm around her waist, she didn't like it and it didn't feel right. But she didn't feel uncomfortable at all with Tristan's arm around her, and that confused her more than anything he'd said all day.  
  
STARS HOLLOW  
  
Rory bolted into the diner that afternoon with Blake right on her. She jumped behind Luke as a shield. "Lorelai Hayden, you are dead!"  
  
"Hey, I only speak the truth."  
  
"Liar."  
  
"It's true."  
  
"I don't like her!"  
  
"Blake and Madeline sitting in a tree-"  
  
"Rory," he said in a deathly quiet voice.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Run." She flew up the stairs with him right behind her. The door flew open and she jumped behind a shirtless Jess, who was in the middle of changing. He looked between the twins in confusion. "You can't hide behind him, Rory. He won't protect you."  
  
"Protect her from what?"  
  
"Him. He's evil."  
  
"I am not!"  
  
"What did he do?"  
  
"Nothing! It's her."  
  
Rory gasped and mocked offense, "I did nothing wrong."  
  
"I don't like her!"  
  
"So you admit it!"  
  
"I didn't admit anything."  
  
"Ah ha! So, you have something to admit!"  
  
"What? No. I do not like her! She has a boyfriend!"  
  
"They're 'talking'. Nothing's official."  
  
"I don't like her."  
  
"Blake, I'm your twin sister, you never could lie to me."  
  
"Madeline isn't even my type."  
  
"Who's Madeline?" Jess asked.  
  
"A girl from school."  
  
"Well thank God for that. I'm not sure how I'd react if you liked a guy Blake."  
  
"Are you hiding something from us?" Rory asked.  
  
"Ha ha. Funny."  
  
"Thank you. You like her."  
  
"I do not!"  
  
"LIES!!"  
  
"Rory, by the time I'm done chasing you, we'll have been around all of Stars Hollow. Twice."  
  
She smiled at him innocently and ran back through the door, leaving Blake to run after her.  
  
THAT NIGHT, DINER  
  
The diner was empty, exept for the four teenagers. Three sitting at the counter and one behind, wiping it down. The bell on the door jingled and Jess looked up, an evil smile spread across his face, "Bean! How are you doing? Back from the week with your grandma?"  
  
"Shut up Jess."  
  
"No, seriously Bean, it's good to see you."  
  
Blake swiveled his stool around, "Beanie! Beanie Fostey."  
  
"Forrester."  
  
"Right, right, Fosty. Glad you're back, me and Jess were getting bored with annoying the freshmen."  
  
"Dean, how are you doing?" Lane asked, turning around.  
  
"Fine, thanks for asking."  
  
"No, really, how ARE you doing?"  
  
"I'm good, thanks."  
  
"No, I want a real answer."  
  
"Tired. It was a long flight."  
  
"Good, now that was a real answer."  
  
Rory turned around, "Guys, leave him alone." she got up and walked over to him. The small peck on the lips was forced, her three friends saw that. "Um, come on Dean, lets go for a walk."  
  
"All right." he took her hand and they walked out of the diner.  
  
"I REALLY hate him." Lane said after the door swung shut.  
  
"Yeah, join the club." Blake said, watching them through the door.  
  
"We're the president and vice president. You can be the counselor or something like that."  
  
"Thanks Jess, that's so sweet."  
  
"I know." he said, distracted. Six eyes were glued to the couple outside the door.  
  
OUTSIDE  
  
Dean wrapped his arm around Rory's waist, and she smiled, reminded of that afternoon. Dean looked down at her and smiled too, "Why are you so happy?" he asked. Rory froze, realizing that it was the thought of Tristan, not Dean that was making her smile. She took his arm from her waist and cupped his hand, not lacing the fingers. Dean was the perfect boyfriend, right? The one she'd always wanted, right? He was sweet, helped her when she needed it, and her parents trusted him completely. They would trust him to sleep in the same bed as their fifteen year old daughter and were confident that nothing would happen. Rory was confident nothing would happen.   
  
But with Tristan, her parents probably wouldn't even trust him to be alone in a room with her. He wasn't safe, not at all. He was the kind of guy that could charm your mother, earn the respect of your father, and carry on a conversation with your little brother. And the whole time think of something he would much rather be doing in your room, with your mom at a friend's party, your dad at work, and your little brother at a friend's house, just the two of you, alone. He was gifted that way, and she wasn't sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing.   
  
"You're quiet." Dean said after a few minuets.  
  
"Just thinking." she whispered.  
  
"About what?"  
  
"School." Rory said quickly, that wasn't a lie, right? Tristan was from school. She definitely couldn't say exactly what she was thinking about, that would be a huge mistake.  
  
"You know Rory, I've been thinking for a while."  
  
"About?"  
  
"Well, I've never known if I could say this, but after being away from you for a week, I think I can, and I know it's true."  
  
"What's that?" she asked, not really listening to him, but thinking of Tristan.  
  
"I love you."   
  
Rory froze, all thought of Tristan flew from her head. What had he just said? Love? He loved her? How could he love her? She didn't even know what love was. Well, she kind of did. She loved her parents. But she also loved her dog, Cricket. But that wasn't exactly like the love Dean felt was it? Her parents loved each other, everyone could see that. But she wasn't sure how to feel Romantic love. What was it? In books people had described it as butterflies in your stomach, every time you looked at the person you got dizzy, your knees got weak, it was hard to look into their eyes before you knew they liked you back, and when you found out they did, all you wanted to do was look into their eyes.  
  
A few minuets later Dean spoke, "Um, now would be the time to say something."  
  
Did she love him? Maybe, as a friend. If she could have said what loving romantically was, she was sure it wasn't what she was feeling. Did she have butterflies in her stomach? Not at the moment. Was she ever dizzy around him? Only when they'd gotten off roller coasters. Did her knees ever go weak? Only when she tripped over something. Had it ever been hard to look into his eyes? Only because he was so tall.  
  
"I." she paused, looking at him, "I." NO! Her body screamed at her, when you love someone, your body and emotions go all funny. That had never happened around him. There had been a small spark at first, a very tiny spark, but now there was nothing, not even a flicker. "I. I don't know what love is." His face fell.  
  
"You don't love me?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"You're killing me Rory."  
  
"I have to go." she turned and sprinted back to her house, not once looking back at the sound of him calling her.  
  
HAYDEN MANSION  
  
Rory flew into the front door and up the stairs, "What's wrong Ror?" her thirteen year old brother asked.  
  
"I. He. And I couldn't. Shane, I don't know what to do!" He walked over and hugged her. He was two years younger than her, but only two or three inches shorter.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"I couldn't say it back Shane, I don't."  
  
"Rory, maybe you should go to bed, you're not making any sense."  
  
"Yeah, I should lay down. Um, good night Shane."  
  
"Night." Rory walked into her room and laid down. If she hadn't been so caught up in thoughts of what Dean would probably say tomorrow, she would have realized that she hadn't felt her stomach move when Dean touched her, like when Tristan had. And she might have realized that when Tristan put his arm around her waist earlier, her knees almost gave out.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
No matter what I do  
  
All I think about is you  
  
Even when I'm with my Boo  
  
Boy, you know I'm crazy over you   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	3. Dilemma, Part Two: Tristan

A/N: Lane and Jess don't live with the Haydens, they just come in without knocking.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
But it ain't that easy for you to back up and leave him  
  
But you and me we got ties for different reasons  
  
I respect that and right before I turn to leave  
  
She said, "You don't know what you mean to me."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Tristan sat across from Rory at lunch on Friday, thinking over what had happened between them in the past week. Of course, he'd only known her for a week, not a lot of time at all but he could tell she was different. That never been kissed feeling he'd gotten upon first meeting her had intensified. She was untouchable, and that didn't sit with him well. Blake and Madeline were staring at one another, but if the other would look then they would turn their head, as if they weren't looking. Paris was complaining about how one of her teachers wouldn't let her do any extra credit, and Louise was talking to Henry. And Rory, Rory was looking down at a notebook in her lap, twirling a strand of hair absent-mindedly.  
  
Her head shot up suddenly, as if she'd felt his gaze. They held eye contact for a moment before she looked back down, her stomach doing back flips and a warm feeling racing through her. Tristan leaned back in his chair, 'Lorelai Leigh Hayden' he said to himself. She wouldn't be with her current boyfriend for much longer.  
  
"So, are you guys going to Alex Larson's party tonight?" Louise asked.   
  
"I am." Madeline answered immediately.  
  
"Tristan?"  
  
"What would a party be without your king?" Tristan asked, smirking.  
  
"Bearable."  
  
"That's cold, Mary."  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"Liar."  
  
"Are you going, Paris?"  
  
"No."  
  
Rory's head snapped around and she stared at the girl, "No. Paris, you have to go."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because, all of them will be wasted, I want someone to talk to."  
  
"Jess and Lane will be there."   
  
"Thank you Blake, I know that. Jess will be wasted and Lane probably can't go because of her mom. So," she said, turning to Paris, "You have to be there."  
  
"Maybe."  
  
"Please, please, please Paris! They'll all be making out and ignoring me."  
  
"I guess I'll go."  
  
"Good."  
  
  
  
"Ror," Blake said a few minuets later.  
  
"Hm?"  
  
"Please say you didn't tell your dumbass boyfriend about that party."  
  
"Oops."  
  
"Rory!"  
  
"Blake!" she said, mocking him.  
  
"Why would you tell him about it?"  
  
"I have my reasons." Blake shook his head, muttering under his breath. Tristan smirked to himself, he'd finally get to meet the boyfriend.  
  
  
  
HAYDEN MANSION  
  
Rory and Lane were in her room, trying on numerous outfits. "Here, try this one." Rory handed Lane low dark blue hip huggers and a red shirt with a black zipper across the front.  
  
"So, tell me about Hartford guys." she said, pulling the shirt over her head.  
  
"Well, most of them are nice I guess. And they definitely look better than most guys in Stars Hollow."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Oh yeah."  
  
"Is there a certain one that you're thinking about?" she asked, smiling at the blush creeping up on her friend's face. Lane threw Rory a black shirt that had purple stars on it and purple fishnet sleeves and thumb holes. Her pants were black and slightly baggy, they unzipped down the shin and had purple stars.  
  
"Not really." She tossed a green army shirt to Lane.  
  
"Liar."  
  
Rory shrugged, "I have a boyfriend." Lane sighed, mumbling.   
  
"What?"  
  
"It's just, Rory, sorry but, he's a jackass."  
  
"Lane!"  
  
"What? You know it and I know it. Why do you think Jess and Blake hate him so much?"  
  
"Brotherly protection."  
  
"Other than that."  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"It's because they can see it too. Look, just watch him tonight, okay?"  
  
"What do you think I'll see?"  
  
"How he is when drunk and around other girls."  
  
"Fine, whatever. I like these." Rory said, talking about their clothes.  
  
"Yup, me too." They linked arms and walked out of her room to the living room where the guys were waiting.  
  
Five minuets earlier the door bell had rung. Jess and Blake smiled to each other and went to the door. Jess threw it open, "BEAN!" Dean rolled his eyes and stepped inside.   
  
"Fag."   
  
"I can't believe my sister's dating you."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Well, I should have said, I can't believe she's STILL dating you."  
  
"What the hell are you talking about Hayden?"  
  
"After what you said I would have dumped your ass."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
"What are you talking about?" Jess asked in a stage voice.  
  
"You know, when he said he loved her." Blake answered in the same manner.  
  
"I'm warning you two."  
  
"What are you going to do? We've put up with you for too long Forrester. I know exactly why you told Rory you loved her."  
  
"And why is that?"  
  
"You want her, all of Stars Hollow High knows. You said that because you hoped that if she thought she loved you then she would sleep with you."  
  
"No, see, I'm not like you two, I don't say things to girls just to get into their pants." he smirked, but stepped back as Blake lunged forward. Jess grabbed him and held him back as Lane and Rory appeared at the top of the stairs.   
  
He let go of Blake and whispered to Dean, "I swear, if you hurt Rory or try to pressure her into ANYTHING, you'll be dead."  
  
He whispered back mockingly, "You'll kill me?"   
  
Blake leaned forward, "Remember Wes Stanton?" a look of horror crossed Dean's face and the other two nodded.   
  
"Watch it, Forrester." Jess said as Rory and Lane came up to them.  
  
"Ready?"  
  
"Yup, let's go." Jess held his arm out to Rory before Dean could and she took it, rolling her eyes. Blake put an arm around Lane's shoulders and Dean walked out after them. Jess was the oldest out of all of them and he'd turned sixteen a few months ago, so he was driving. They took the Black Pathfinder that belonged to Chris. Dean, Rory, and Lane were in back, in that order, with Blake in the passenger's seat. Blake giving directions and the music, which Dean complained about, were the only sounds.  
  
When they got there the party was already in full swing. There were drunk teenagers all over the place, Jess almost hit a few that got out of the way at the last second. He didn't swerve because he said that 'If you go to that stupid prep school then you should be smart enough to get out of the way of a car, because if you get hit then the car's not goin' down, you are.' He parked the car and they jumped out, Madeline came over.  
  
"You guys made it. Hey Rory, Blake, three people I don't know."  
  
"Yeah, Maddy, these are our friends Jess and Lane." Blake introduced them.  
  
"Hey, I'm Madeline."   
  
"Hey." the oriental girl smiled and Jess just nodded.  
  
"But, um, who's the third person I don't know?"  
  
"Just some annoying kid who follows us around." Blake said, getting a glare from Rory.  
  
"He's my boyfriend, Dean."  
  
"Hi Dean."  
  
"Hi."  
  
"Maddy, who all's here?" Rory asked.  
  
"Louise is inside dancing, Paris is scaring everyone by asking every person she sees if they know where you are, Henry is playing air hockey, and Tristan is looking for Mary." Rory nodded, understanding what she meant.   
  
"Want to dance?" Blake asked, Madeline nodded and followed him inside.  
  
"Who's Mary?" Jess asked.  
  
"I'll introduce you to her later. But first I want you to meet someone. You too Lane."  
  
"Me?"  
  
"Yup. Come on." She walked inside and the other three followed her. Rory looked around for people, she spotted Louise dancing with Baker Haulk. She waved to the dance floor and the blond girl smiled, mouthing 'Hey'. Rory turned and saw Henry walking up the basement stairs. "HENRY!" she screamed over the music, he turned hearing his name. She waved, motioning for him to come over. Lane grabbed Rory's arm, "Rory, he's really cute."  
  
"I thought you would like him." Henry had weaved his way between the mass of teenagers and was now with them.  
  
"Hey Rory."  
  
"Hey, these are mine and Blake's best friends, Lane and Jess." Henry nodded to Jess and smiled at Lane, who was too shocked to say anything. "Can you show Lane around for me?"  
  
"Of course." he held out his arm and Lane took it, turning to Rory and mouthing 'Thank you' as he led her away.  
  
"Are you planing on getting rid of me like that?" Jess asked, amused at the fact that Rory was playing match maker.  
  
"Yes, I am." she said, scanning the crowd for any sign of Paris. Dean grabbed a sealed, unlabeled bottle off of a table they passed.  
  
Someone came up to them, "Hey Ma-" Rory covered Tristan's mouth before he could say Mary and Dean find out that he'd been looking for her.   
  
Rory kept looking around, "PARIS!" she called upon seeing the girl enter the room. Paris saw her and nodded, making her way over. Rory jumped suddenly and wiped her hand on Tristan's shirt, "You licked me!"  
  
"Don't put your hand over someone's mouth unless you plan on getting either licked or bitten." he looked down at his chest, which Rory's hand was still on. But she wasn't paying attention to that when Paris ended up next to them.  
  
"Hey, I've been looking for you."  
  
"Sorry, we got here later than I thought. Paris, this is my friend Jess Mariono. Jess, this is Paris Gellar."   
  
"Hi." Paris held her hand out to shake Jess', who held hers and kissed the knuckles.  
  
"Hi." she smiled and bit her lip before taking her hand back.  
  
"Paris, can you show Jess around for me?"  
  
"Sure." she took his hand and Jess turned nodding to Rory as thanks before following Paris.  
  
Rory turned back to face Tristan and was met with his over confident smirk, "What?" he looked down to his chest and Rory quickly removed her hand. "Um, Dean, this is my friend Tristan Dugrey. Tris, this is my boyfriend, Dean Forrester." They nodded to each other.  
  
"Tris?" Dean asked.  
  
"Um, no, no. Tristan."  
  
"You called him Tris."  
  
"Yes, it's a nickname."  
  
"Ah." he took another swig and drained his bottle.  
  
"What was in that?" she wondered out loud.   
  
Dean shrugged, "Don't know, don't care."  
  
She turned to Tristan, who tilted his head, looking at the bottle, "I'm not sure, but given the things that are here, I wouldn't have drank the whole bottle."  
  
Dean shrugged again, "Let's dance Rory."  
  
"Okay, I'll see you later Tris." Dean pulled her to the dance floor as a slow song came on. He wrapped his arms around her waist and she put her hands on his shoulders, looking at Tristan, who was talking to Baker and Louise. He looked up just as she had at lunch, their eyes met for a moment and a small smile slid onto his face as he turned back to the couple. Rory smiled when she turned back to Dean. They danced a few minuets until his hands slid a little too low for her comfort. But Rory, thinking that maybe he hadn't realized his hands had moved, didn't do anything. A few seconds later his hands slipped into her back pockets. She pulled back and stepped away from him. "Dean, what the hell do you think you're doing?"  
  
"Rory, come on, we're fifteen."  
  
"Your point?"  
  
"Look Rory, I just, I want to be with you."  
  
"Okay, but you don't just do that to someone."  
  
"Sorry. Come on." he held his arms out.  
  
She shook her head, "No, later."  
  
"Oh, so you're going to find 'Tris'?" he spat the name as if it was something vile.  
  
"Better than being with you."  
  
"Whatever Rory, whatever."   
  
"Later Dean." she walked off to the side, looking for someone to talk to when she saw Tristan. "Hey."  
  
He turned, "Hey."  
  
"You look bored."  
  
"I am. See, there's this girl, that I really want to dance with, but she has a boyfriend, so, you know, it doesn't really work."  
  
She smiled, playing along, "Does this girl have a name?"  
  
"Mary."  
  
"Mary?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"I think I may know her."  
  
"You probably do." Rory smiled, looking down at her hands. "Why do you go out with him?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Why are you going out with Dean?"  
  
She shrugged, "I don't know, I guess I like him."  
  
"You guess?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"And he supposedly 'loves' me."  
  
"Do you love him?"  
  
"No. I mean I do like him, don't get me wrong, I like him. But I definitely don't love him."  
  
Tristan looked down, mumbling, "He doesn't deserve you."  
  
"Why do you say that?"  
  
"Because, Rory. I mean, why do you put up with him?"  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"Rory I saw him okay, I saw him. He knew what he was doing and he wanted to see how far you'd let him go."  
  
"He's been drinking, he made a mistake."   
  
"One hell of a mistake."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"Rory, he knew exactly what he was doing! He's not completely out of it. He wanted to see how far he could push you, and you're acting like nothing happened!"  
  
"Why do you care so much?"  
  
"I care about what will happen if he pushes you too far!"  
  
"You don't even know him!"  
  
"I know you!"  
  
"Stop, okay! Just stop!"  
  
"Stop what?"  
  
"Caring! I've only known you for a week and since then I've been so confused."  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"I have a boyfriend. A perfect boyfriend. He's sweet and he barely ever drinks. And he loves me! I've never wondered if a guy liked me, I've never had every thought consumed by one person. But now, I meet you, and everything I thought I knew is changing. I don't like Dean as much anymore. I don't care what he thinks anymore. The first time he said he loved me, all I was thinking about was you. But I can't just leave him. We have too much history. I can't just forget that. He was drunk, and I can't hate him for that. I can't just leave him no matter what I think about you. It's not fair to Dean. But I keep thinking about you and it scares me."  
  
Tristan shook his head and laughed bitterly, "Rory, you have two guys that want you, but you can't have both. Pick one and let the other move on. Now choose, which one do you want more?"  
  
She stared at him, sapphire on sapphire, "Don't you know?"  
  
He stared at her for a moment before shaking his head again and backing away, "Fine, I hope you're happy with him, and just so you know, I've never cheated on a girl in my life, unlike him." he turned, walking to sit with Louise and Baker. Rory watched him walk away, he couldn't see. He didn't know it was him.   
  
Rory looked around and saw Dean sitting on a couch with some girl on his lap, another drink in hand. She made her way over and stood in front of him, he looked up, "Rory, babe, what's up?"  
  
She shook her head, "Nothing much."  
  
"Look, Ror, I've been thinking, I do love you," he hiccuped, "But, I want to see other girls too. Be with you, and them. You know, like," hiccup, "An open relationship."  
  
Rory nodded, as if thinking it over, "You know what? That might work, you seeing other girls."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yeah. Because we're over."  
  
"What?"  
  
"We're over, I don't want to go out with you anymore. Have all the Chilton whores you want, I won't stop you. I can't believe they were right about you!"  
  
"Who?!"  
  
"Lane, Jess, Blake, Tristan."  
  
"Tristan, huh? Well aren't we buddy buddy with Tristan?"  
  
"You know what, bite me Dean. I'm through with you. I don't care what you think, we're over. Don't talk to me anymore, I don't want to see your face." She turned to walk away, but turned back, "Oh, and get a ride back to Stars Hollow. You'll need one." She walked away, leaving a speechless Dean sitting there. Tristan had been watching the whole confrontation from across the room. Rory headed to the door, pausing next to Tristan, "You thought wrong." was all she said before storming outside and falling asleep in the back seat of the car.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
'Cause I-I never been the type to break up a happy home  
  
But there's something 'bout baby girl   
  
I just can't leave her 'lone  
  
So tell me, ma, what's it gonna be  
  
She said, "You don't know what you mean to me."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	4. Girlfriend

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Why don't you be my girlfriend  
  
I'll treat you good  
  
I know you hear your friends   
  
When they say you should  
  
'Cause if you were my girlfriend  
  
I'd be your shining star  
  
The one to show you where you are  
  
Girl you should be my girlfriend  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rory frowned at Paris, "No."  
  
"Oh, come on. Jess and I have been talking since Friday. Six days. And you haven't even spoken to Tristan since the party. Every one told you about Dean, every one knew he was wrong for you. And every one knows Tristan is right for you, now call him."  
  
"No."  
  
"Rory!"  
  
"Paris!"  
  
"Just call him." she threw the phone to Rory.  
  
"No." Rory threw it back.  
  
"Fine, don't talk to him."  
  
"Fine, I won't."  
  
"Good."  
  
"Good."  
  
"So, change of subject."  
  
"Thank you!"  
  
"Anyway," Paris smiled at her friend, "Jess asked me out."  
  
Rory squealed, "Shut up! He did not!"  
  
Paris smiled too, "He did! And I was so surprised because I didn't even expect it. I mean, I liked him, but I never thought he liked me."  
  
"I knew he would. If I didn't think you were perfect for each other then I wouldn't have introduced you. Opposites attract, remember that."  
  
Paris bit her lip, "So, have you talked to Lane about Henry?"  
  
"Yes, and she's totally blown away by how perfect he is, and she loves that he's not obsessed with tradition."  
  
"We should probably get Henry as the third person in our group for this project and I was talking to Jess and you know, we still don't really know each other yet and seeing as how you know both of us and we have never been on a date before, well actually I've never been on a date before. We were wondering if you might want to double with us and bring the guy of your choice so we could break the ice easier. Because you know, Madeline and Louise aren't that reliable when it comes to projects." she said all in one breath, leaving Rory staring at her.  
  
"Um, sure on the group, but no on the date."  
  
"Uh! Rory! Come on! You haven't done anything with us all week. Forget about Dean and let's go."  
  
"I don't know. Take Blake and Madeline. Blake knows both of you too."   
  
"Yeah, but I don't want Blake to go, I want you to. Come on, please!"  
  
"Paris, I'm not asking a guy out."  
  
"Fine, I'll do it for you."  
  
"No. You're not asking a guy out for me."  
  
"Fine, I'll get Jess to ask one of his friends."  
  
"From Stars Hollow?"  
  
"No. From Chilton."  
  
"Jess has friends from Chilton?"  
  
"Yeah, he was talking to a bunch of people at that party."  
  
"Wow. He's usually Mister Anti-Social."  
  
"Not there."  
  
"Fine, get Jess to do it. But not Tristan. Please not Tristan."  
  
"Do you really think that Jess would choose Tristan?"  
  
"I guess not."  
  
"I don't think so either." She cast a glance at Rory, "Um, while we're on the subject, you know I've never been on a date before, so I've never needed the clothes. So I was just wondering, you know, um, what size are you?"  
  
"Four." she said, leaning back and smiling.  
  
"Oh my God Rory, I love you!" Paris screamed, jumping on her friend.   
  
Rory laughed, "Okay, come on. We have to find something for you to wear."  
  
NEXT NIGHT, FRIDAY  
  
Rory ran the brush through her hair one last time before looking over herself in the mirror. She had on a sheer dark red top with black trimming and bell sleeves. Her black pants also belled out at the bottom and her platform boots went up to the knee. Her hair was brushed straight and she had on only lip gloss, other makeup always annoyed her.   
  
There was a knock on the door, "Come in." Blake pushed it opened and walked in, circling her, making sure the neckline wasn't too low and that the pants weren't too tight. What he didn't like was the top.   
  
"Rory, no."  
  
"Blake, yes."  
  
"No."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"It's sheer!"  
  
"Thank you master of the obvious."  
  
"You're welcome, queen of the oblivious."  
  
"Oh, that's nice."  
  
"Come on, please."  
  
"I like this shirt."  
  
"And I'm sure the guy will too."  
  
She laughed at her brother, "Blake, I'm fine, I'll be fine. If the guy tries to jump me then I'm sure Jess will protect me."  
  
He groaned, "Rory!"  
  
"Blake!"  
  
"Please."  
  
She put a hand on his cheek with a fake look of sadness, "No. Sorry."  
  
He bit her hand, "Evil."  
  
"I'm not the one who bit you." she said, rubbing her hands together.  
  
"Well, I want to meet this guy after the date, and if I-" he was cut off by the ringing of the doorbell. Rory started to walk forward but Blake put a hand on her stomach, stopping her. "No, no, no. I'll get it. You stay here." he handed her the leather jacket that was on the floor, "Here, you'll need this. It's cold and you'll freeze to death in that top."  
  
"Very funny!" she called to his back as he disappeared through the door.   
  
She waited a few minuets before following him. Rory jumped down the stairs and walked over to her brother who was talking to Paris, "So, you ready Rory?" she asked, smiling widely.  
  
Rory was surprised it was Paris and not her date, "Yeah, but um, where is he?"  
  
She smiled, "It's a surprise."  
  
"Right." Rory walked out the door and passed Paris, walking to Jess' car. Paris and Blake locked eyes, smirking. Rory turned around, "Coming, Paris?" she nodded and followed Rory to Jess' car. The windows were tinted to almost black. He said that it was 'To keep the stupid, nosy towns people from looking into his windows when the car was parked'. Rory went to open the back door when Paris grabbed her arm and put a blind fold over her eyes. "Hey!"  
  
"Sorry Rory, but your date is a surprise until we get there."  
  
"Paris!"  
  
"Shh." she opened the door and sat Rory beside another person, she guessed they were blind folded too. Paris buckled her in. "Don't talk to each other. Just sit here. It's not a long drive. The engine started and the car moved forward. With the way Paris was acting, Rory would have thought that Tristan was beside her, but she was comforted by the fact that Jess had picked the guy. She was confident that he wouldn't pick Tristan. The radio was on and Paris was talking with Jess in the front seat, but neither person in the back was uttering a word. After ten minuets the car pulled to a stop and the engine was cut off. The two front doors opened and closed, one person walked on either side of the car before the two back doors were opened and Paris helped Rory out, while Jess pulled the guy out. The back doors were shut and Rory's blind fold was taken off.   
  
She smiled at the sight in front of her. They were at a large theme park, "You like roller coasters, Paris?"  
  
"Surprised?"  
  
"Very." she kept smiling as she turned to face the blond, "So, who's the guy?"  
  
Paris began to lead her around to the back of the car, "Now remember, I had nothing to do with the choice, it was all Jess, not me."  
  
"Okay. I'm getting the feeling I won't like him. What's wrong with him?"  
  
"Well, let's just say you wouldn't expect him."  
  
"Oh no, please tell me you didn't-" Rory groaned as she saw Jess leading a boy from the other side of the car, "Tristan."  
  
She heard him say her name in the same tone as she'd said his. Tristan must have been having a similar conversation with Jess. She turned around, "Paris!"  
  
"Jess!" Tristan did the same.  
  
"Hey, you two have to talk." Paris turned Rory around and Jess turned Tristan. They pushed them together and Jess handed each of them a ticket.   
  
"Meet us back at the car at eleven thirty. That's when they close." Jess and Paris walked away, leaving Rory and Tristan standing there.  
  
Rory stared at their backs in shock, "You didn't really need me to 'break the ice' did you?" she yelled at their backs, ten yards away. Paris turned and shook her head before turning back to Jess.  
  
"Great." Tristan groaned, "Great."  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "Oh yeah, you're stuck with me for three and a half hours. It must completely suck."  
  
"No. It's just that you're mad at me that sucks. If you weren't mad at me then this would be awesome. But in our present relationship, this situation sucks."  
  
"Well I totally agree."  
  
"At least we agree on something."  
  
"Come on, let's just go inside." she said, grabbing his arm and walking to the entrance.  
  
JESS AND PARIS  
  
"So, do you think they've started talking yet?" Jess asked as they stood in line.  
  
"I'm guessing they fought a few minuets ago, talked about how fighting sucks, decided to go in, and now they're walking through the park in silence. With the occasional insult, of course."  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You think so?"  
  
"I do."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes, really."  
  
"I wouldn't doubt it."  
  
"And now they're probably about to ride something, not talking to each other, but when they get off, Rory will grab Tristan's hand, ending the week long fight. And before the night is over, one will break and kiss the other."  
  
"WHAT!?" Jess yelled, turning to her, "No one said anything about them kissing!"  
  
"Don't worry about it."  
  
"Yeah, I'm gonna worry. Tristan is my friend, but Rory is like a sister and if-" Jess was cut off by Paris grabbing his face and kissing him gently. She pulled back, just as surprised as him.  
  
"You're good at that." he said, shocked.  
  
"Thank you." Paris blushed.  
  
"Okay, you guys go in the first row..." the man running the ride waved them through.   
  
Paris sat and pulled down the restraint, buckling her belt to it. Jess did the same, he turned to face her, "Ready?"  
  
She smiled, taking his hand, "Ready."  
  
RORY AND TRISTAN  
  
They stood in line for the first ride in the park when Rory jumped up. "What?" Tristan asked upon her moving.  
  
"I thought I saw Jess and Paris."   
  
"Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised. They came in right before us and this IS the first ride." he said, rolling his eyes.  
  
"Oh, shut up."  
  
"No."  
  
"Damn Tristan, what did I ever do to you?"  
  
"You haven't talked to me in a week."  
  
"What? You haven't talked to me!"  
  
"What the hell Rory? I've called you three times and you've never called back!"  
  
"I wasn't home!"  
  
"Yeah, well guess what? There's this thing called an answering machine! I left a message every time, but you never called back!"  
  
"I was busy."  
  
"You've been busy for a week?"  
  
"Yes." she growled, turning away from him.  
  
"Rory!" her head snapped up.  
  
"Paris! Hey!" Paris and Jess were on the other side, they'd just gotten off.  
  
"Okay, would you two please go in the third row?" the man asked. Rory and Tristan walked through and buckled themselves in.  
  
Rory bit her lip and smiled, the first roller coaster always made her queasy. "Ready?"  
  
Tristan nodded, "Ready." he said as they began to move forward.   
  
After the ride was over Rory stood up, running her fingers through her hair. Tristan smirked as she did. "What?"  
  
"You do that a lot."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Run your fingers through your hair. You always worry that it looks bad, but it never does."  
  
She smiled, "Thanks." He nodded and wrapped his arm around her waist loosely, walking to the next ride. Rory looked up at him, biting her lip again. "Tristan,"  
  
"Hm?"  
  
"I-I'm sorry."  
  
"About what?"  
  
"Ignoring you for a week. It wasn't fair. I was mad that you were right about Dean and it wasn't fair for me to be a jerk just because you were worried about me."  
  
He shook his head, "Forget about it." she nodded and looked forward. They walked in silence until he asked, "Did you mean it?"  
  
"Mean what?" she stopped walking and turned to face him.  
  
"What you said at the party, you keep thinking about me, how you've never had anyone consume your every thought, when Dean said he loved you that you were thinking about me." he walked forward, backing her into a wall.  
  
Her back met the cold stone and she looked up into his eyes, whispering, "Every word."  
  
Tristan leaned down so their lips were inches apart, "Good." he captured her lips in a slow kiss. Rory's hands grabbed at the front of his shirt. One of his hands rested on her hip and the other touch her face gently, his fingers ran over her cheek until they were resting in her hair and his palm was covering her ear. He ran his tongue over her bottom lip gently and she opened her mouth, inviting him in. Their lips moved together slowly and a shock ran over her spine like she'd never felt with Dean. Tristan deepened the kiss, and she pulled him closer.  
  
Rory broke away after a few minuets, her lips still tingling dully as Tristan whispered, "Because I feel the same."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Ever since I saw your face  
  
Nothing in my life has been the same  
  
I walk around just saying your name  
  
Without you my world would end  
  
I looked around this whole damn place  
  
And everything says you were meant to be   
  
My girlfriend   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	5. All You Wanted

A/N: The song in my last chapter was Girlfriend by Nsync. If you want to know the name of a song I use, then it will be the name of the chapter.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
I didn't know that it was so cold  
  
And you needed someone  
  
To show you the way  
  
So I took your hand and   
  
We figured out that  
  
When the tide comes  
  
I'd take you away  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
On Monday Tristan walked up to Rory in the hall. "So, tell me something, Mary," he said, leaning against the locker next to hers. "What are we?"  
  
She closed her locker and turned to face him, "You tell me."  
  
"Seriously?"  
  
"Seriously."  
  
"Well, it depends."  
  
"On?"  
  
"What do you want to be?"  
  
"I don't want to feel like an idiot."  
  
"You won't."  
  
"How do you know?"  
  
"Trust me."  
  
"Never."  
  
"Ouch."  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"Liar."  
  
"Actually, I am sorry."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Oh, that's nice."  
  
"Isn't it though?"  
  
"Hm." The bell rang, giving them five minuets to be in homeroom. Rory turned to walk away, Tristan followed her, "Hey, you never answered my question!"  
  
She turned around, "I was waiting for your opinion."  
  
"But Mary."  
  
"What Tristan?"  
  
"I asked you first, therefore, you have to tell me."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Really." she leaned against a locker behind her, thinking, until Tristan put a hand on either side of the locker, trapping her and asked, "Rory, what do you want us to be?"  
  
"Honestly?"  
  
"Honestly."  
  
"I guess," she paused, looking at him slowly, her mind running in overdrive, making pros and cons in her head. Pro: she liked him, he liked her, they liked each other. He was much better for her than Dean and he had a better sense of humor than her ex. Con: He was a playboy. He went through girls like they were nothing, he loved the game. But she had to admit, what she was feeling for him romantically outweighed how scared she was to get hurt. "I guess I want us to go out."  
  
Tristan felt his heart beat faster, "As in I'm your boyfriend, you're my girlfriend?"  
  
"Yeah," she whispered, "Like that." Before his lips captured hers in a strong kiss. She felt her stomach disappear like it had on the roller coaster that weekend. His hands slipped to her waist and she wrapped her arms around his neck, their lips moving together slowly until some one cleared their throat. Rory broke away, hearing Tristan protest with a groan. She looked up and saw Blake and Madeline on one side of them, Louise and Baker on the other, and Paris and Henry behind Tristan. Rory blushed and looked at her feet, removing her hands from Tristan. He smirked and leaned against the locker beside her, looking at their friends.  
  
"A lip lock as soon as you start going out, that's new." Blake said, "Very different from Bean."  
  
"Shut up." Rory said, blushing a deeper shade of crimson.  
  
"Ignore him, Rory. It's great that you two are going out." Madeline said, elbowing Blake.  
  
He grabbed his side in mock pain and laughed, she stuck her tongue out at him and he pulled it into his own mouth. Rory's face contorted, "Eww. Sister here, Blake." he ignored her and backed Madeline into a locker. "I'm being ignored." she said indignantly.   
  
Louise tilted her head to the side, "Rory, if you were doing that, would you listen to Blake?"  
  
Rory looked at the same angle as Louise, "Hm, no."  
  
"Neither would I."  
  
"Well," Baker said, turning Louise and backing her into the wall, "We can make that happen." he captured her lips, putting them in the same position as Blake and Madeline. Tristan wrapped his arms around Rory from behind and kissed her neck.  
  
Paris turned to Henry and patted him on the shoulder, "Well Henry, I love you and all, but I think it would be best if we just exit right about now." she said, looking around at the three couples.  
  
"Yeah, I think so too." he followed her to their homeroom, leaving the others each in their own world.  
  
AFTERNOON, HAYDEN'S  
  
Tristan sat on the floor, pulling Rory down to sit between his legs. He nuzzled her neck gently and she leaned her head to the side, giving him more room. "Are you guys coming tonight?" Baker asked the twins, they were all in the basement, listening to music and talking.   
  
"I think our grandparents are making us. you know, to finalize our 'entrance into society'." Blake said, his head in Madeline's lap, laying on the sofa.  
  
"I'm bringing Lane. My parents want to meet her." Henry said, Lane sitting on his lap.  
  
"What about you, Jess?" Madeline asked.  
  
He shrugged, "Yeah, I'm going with Paris." she nodded and leaned back on his chest.  
  
Rory turned to her little brother, "Shane, is your girlfriend coming?"  
  
"Yeah. She's been to a bunch of these things."  
  
"Just warning you guys, elite parties suck." Tristan told them, the five who were experienced in the area nodded in agreement.  
  
"Every one is fake-nice," Louise explained, "So don't take any compliments to hear and ignore the insults. They never mean it, people say things because it's expected."  
  
Rory's eyes closed and she leaned on Tristan's chest. "Tonight's going to be hell." she said, loud enough for only him to hear, he tightened his grip on her.   
  
THAT NIGHT, HATRFORD COUNTRY CLUB  
  
The Haydens sat in the parking lot, all five dreading what was about to happen. "Dad, there's still time to bail."  
  
"I agree with Shane, we should just leave, we won't be missed."   
  
"Yeah, Blake's right, Shane has a good idea. There are enough people here. Besides, there's probably no coffee here."  
  
"Ah! My daughter is right! No coffee equals bad and bad is not good." Lorelai said, facing Chris.  
  
"Do you seriously want to face your parents is we don't show up?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Exactly. Let's go." The other four grumbled but climbed out. Rory was wearing a long sleeveless, flowing light yellow dress that almost swept the ground and Lorelai had on a strapless black knee length dress. All three guys were wearing suits. Chris walked in first, followed closely by his family, his wife, youngest son, and the twins came in last and at the same time.   
  
Rory looked around in shock, it was packed. Beautiful and elegant, women seemed to glide, weightless, across the polished floor. The men all had confident strides, with looks of power and assurance. The teenagers walked with ease, each knowing how to please and compliment an adult. They had looks of boredom, as if they were used to this. The small children moved timidly and with respect, perfectly bred and raised. But all looked cold, that was what she noticed. All were cold and unforgiving, impersonal and detached from the real world. Each lived in their own, the public had made them believe that they were above every one and every thing, nothing could harm the elite. And they believed it, their world had no feeling. If the eyes of most had ever had a sparkle, it was now long extinguished, no feeling belonged in society. Feeling was weak. And the weak were hunted and drained of everything they had.  
  
Rory jumped upon some one wrapping their arms around her waist from behind. "Hey." Tristan whispered into her ear.   
  
A delicious tingle ran through her body, "Hi." she whispered back, pushing to him slightly, wanting the comfort of his warm embrace to hide her from the coldness of the room.   
  
They walked through the room, mingling as they were instructed to do. Blake had been led away by Madeline a few minuets earlier. After half an hour of talking to other Chiltonites, Emily came over, "Rory! I've been looking everywhere for you. My, you do look lovely." she took her granddaughter's hands and looked her over, "That used to be your mother's dress, didn't it?" Rory nodded. "Did you know it was mine before I gave it to her?"  
  
"No, I didn't."  
  
"It was my mother's too. You look exactly like her." Emily smiled, remembering, "It's been in the family for years."  
  
"Well, it is a beautiful dress grandma."   
  
"Yes. It was always my favorite."  
  
"Do you know my friend, Tristan Dugrey?" she asked, pilling him to her side.  
  
"Oh, Tristan, it's lovely to see you again." Emily gushed.  
  
"You too, Mrs. Gilmore." he said, kissing her hand lightly.  
  
She smiled, "Well, aren't you a charmer?"  
  
"I'd like to think so."  
  
Emily smiled, "So, how long have you two been friends?"  
  
"Well, actually grandma we're," Rory paused and Emily looked at her, "Well, we're, um, we're dating."  
  
Her grandmother smiled, "My dear, Rory! That's wonderful! Much better than that other boy, Dan."  
  
"Dean."  
  
"Yes, Dean. Much better. I never liked him, but I do like Tristan."  
  
"Um, thank you Mrs. Gilmore." Tristan said, nodding.  
  
"Um, yeah, I like him more too, grandma." she said, surprised by the woman's excitement.  
  
A woman came over to get Emily, "Well, I have to go. It was wonderful to see you Rory," she hugged her granddaughter, "And Tristan, I hope to see more of you." she said before turning to leave. Rory nodded and followed Tristan to a corner of the room.  
  
"Um, where are your parents?" she asked.  
  
"You don't want to meet my parents." he said, not looking at her.  
  
"Oh." she said, looking down at her hands.  
  
"No! No. It's not you." he grabbed her hands, "It's them, they aren't exactly the nicest people in the world, and they aren't often polite. I just don't want you to have to meet them." he assured.  
  
"Oh, so they wouldn't like me?"  
  
"If they were capable of feeling then they would, but they don't care about anything enough to get to know any one. And I don't want them to offend you in any way."  
  
She smiled, leaning forward to kiss him gently, "Thank you."  
  
"For what?"  
  
"Protecting me."  
  
He smiled capturing her lips in a slow, passionate kiss. He pulled away after a few minuets and stood up, she followed the movement. He wrapped one arm around Rory's waist, guiding her through the room. They passed by a young couple, the man had Tristan's face and the woman had his hair and eyes. "Tristan, son," the man said, clapping him on the back, "Who is your friend?" although he didn't sound interested at all.  
  
Tristan closed his eyes for a moment and opened them again as the woman turned, looking at Rory as coldly as her husband. She was beautiful; she had high cheek bones, a body to die for, her bronze skin clashed horribly with Rory's pale one, and she had amazing eyes, empty, but hypnotic. Cold. It was one word to explain the two. They'd only said something because it would look strange if your son passed and you said nothing to him. "Mom, dad, this is my girlfriend, Rory Hayden. Rory, these are my parents."  
  
Tristan's father shook her hand stiffly, but his mother made no movement to touch the girl. Rory bit her lip and pulled the hand back shakily. "Any relation to Christopher Hayden?" she asked icily.  
  
"Um, yes, he's my father, ma'am." Rory tensed and Tristan rubbed small circles into her hip soothingly.  
  
"And that would make Lorelai Gilmore your mother?"  
  
"Yes." she said, wanting to run as far away from this woman as she could, she was shaking internally under the intense stare, but her pride kept her from making any movement.  
  
Mrs. Dugrey pursed her lips and said cattily, "Lovely woman, good at everything, Lord knows she beat me at every single thing we both did. And I suppose you and your brother are the same, good at everything, eh?" hate burned in the woman's eyes, and Rory wasn't sure if it was from hate for her or her mother. She decided it would be best not to answer.   
  
"Okay, well I'll see you two when we leave, bye." Tristan's grip tightened around her waist as he led Rory through the back doors and to a garden, a few people stopped them to talk to him, but he only exchanged pleasantries and introduced her before moving on.   
  
A smile spread over Rory's face as the cool November air encircled her. "I thought you'd like it out here." She smiled and laid her head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her, "I'm sorry. I really didn't want you to have to do that."  
  
She snuggled closer to him, "It's okay, I'll live."  
  
"Like I said, they can't feel. They're so cold. All of society is."  
  
"Don't worry about it, really. I'm okay. Besides, they weren't that bad."  
  
Tristan laughed, "You don't have to lie to me. I know she's a bitch. I hate her."  
  
"Don't hate your parents."  
  
"I can't help it."  
  
"Mm." she leaned her elbows on the rail over looking the grounds. He kept his arms around her waist, kissing her neck gently.   
  
"I'm so glad I have you."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I'm not sure how I'd end up with some one like me." he kissed down her shoulder.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Someone who grew up in society. I don't want to end up like my parents." he whispered, his voice cracking. She closed her eyes as he kissed her temple, "You can stop it, no one else."  
  
Rory leaned her head to the side, exposing more skin. He kissed a trail down her neck and over her shoulder, causing a soft moan to escape her red lips. The trail went over and behind her ear, nipping it playfully. When he got back down to her neck, seriousness returned. He focused on the junction between her neck and shoulder, kissing and licking it gently at first. But soon he began to suck her neck and bit it, causing her back to arch and another moan to escape her. They'd known each other for three weeks, and already he could make her blood turn to liquid fire and her veins boil with heat. She'd dated Dean for a few months and he'd barely ever kissed her more than PG. But she was sure that Dean wasn't even capable of what Tristan was doing, at least not to her.  
  
She'd always know that one day she would be introduced back into society. She'd always wondered what it was like to be in the elite. What she hadn't expected was what she found. A few people who could love and feel. The younger ones mostly, but others, the adults, showed no emotion. She hadn't known this elite world was so cold. And all she wanted was to take Tristan away from it.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  
All you wanted was somebody who cares  
  
If you need me you know I'll be there  
  
If you want to  
  
I can save you   
  
I can take you away from here  
  
So lonely inside  
  
So busy out there  
  
And all you wanted was somebody who cares  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	6. All or Nothing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
You know I'd fight for you  
  
But how can I find someone who isn't even there  
  
I've had the best of you   
  
Now I want the rest of you  
  
I don't care if that's not fair  
  
'Cause I want it all or nothing at all  
  
There's no where left to fall  
  
When you reach the bottom it's now or never  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rory sat across the room from Tristan, trying to figure out what Summer's problem was. She was flirting with Tristan as if no one else was there. Didn't she know he had a girlfriend? "And-" Paris stopped talking, "Rory? Are you listening?"  
  
"Um, yeah, sure Paris." she said distractedly. They were working in groups of five on class work and the teacher had chosen groups.  
  
Paris rolled her eyes and whispered so only Rory could hear, "They're partners, he's not cheating on you. He isn't an idiot."  
  
Rory was still distracted by the girl throwing herself at her boyfriend. "What?" she turned her head slowly to look at her friend.  
  
"Rory. School. Focus."  
  
"Right, yeah, what are we doing?"  
  
Paris laughed and handed her a sheet of paper. "So, is Tristan coming over to dinner tonight?"  
  
"Yeah, my parents want to dine with him now that we're dating. Not that they've ever met him before or anything" she said sarcastically.  
  
"That will be worth watching."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Tristan and your parents, having a meal together-priceless."  
  
"Ha ha ha. Very funny."  
  
"Are you worried?"  
  
"No. Should I be?"  
  
Paris shrugged, "Probably not. Jess met my parents and they loved him."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes. Don't worry. Your parents like Tristan anyway."  
  
HAYDAEN'S, NIGHT  
  
The doorbell rang and Rory ran down the stairs, buckling her shoe, "I got it!" she called up the stairs. She stopped in front of the door, straightening her knee length black dress, the one her mother had worn to the country club dinner. Rory opened the door slowly, expecting Tristan, but she was surprised to see Emily and Richard Gilmore, "Grandma?"  
  
"Hello Rory, darling." she kissed her granddaughter's cheeks. Her grandfather walked inside after his wife and hugged Rory as well.  
  
She looked at them, "W-what are you doing here?"  
  
"Your mother invited us. Unusual, but nice. What's the occasion?"  
  
"You guys can sit down, I'll be right back." Ror ran up the stairs to her parent's room, "Mom!" she yelled, throwing the door open.   
  
"Yes sweetie?" Lorelai asked.  
  
"You invited your parents?"  
  
"And your dad's parents." she said as the doorbell rang again.  
  
"What?! Dad!"  
  
"It was her, not me."  
  
"Mom!"  
  
"What? They want to meet him too."   
  
"Mom!"  
  
"Rory!"  
  
"I can't believe you did this."  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"No you're not."  
  
"You're right."  
  
"Mom, it's bad enough YOU two want to have dinner with him when you already know him, but the grandparents?"  
  
"Oh honey, they deserve to meet your boy toy too."  
  
"Mom, do you even like Tristan?"  
  
"Of course I do. Well, not so much now that he's your boyfriend, but I like him okay."  
  
"You don't trust him."  
  
"I have no reason to."  
  
"But you also have no reason not to."  
  
"Um hun, he's your boyfriend. That's reason enough for me."  
  
"Dad, help me out here."  
  
"This is between you two." he said, putting on his tie in the mirror.   
  
Lorelai walked over and took the clip-on out of Chris's hands, handing him a real tie, "Honey, it's not that I don't trust Tristan, it's that I used to be fifteen too, and I know what happens when your parents like and trust your boyfriend."  
  
"But mom, you and dad are married, you had another kid, you guys don't have affairs. Something went right." Rory said, waving her hands around wildly.  
  
"Rory, do you know how rare it is for a teenage mother to marry the baby's father?"  
  
"No. Besides, I'm not a teenage mother."  
  
"I can see that, trust me, if you were then you wouldn't be buying size three and four pants."  
  
"I can't get this!" Chris said in frustration, pulling the tie off his neck. Lorelai walked over to him and started to tie it easily.  
  
"Sweets, I promise, I will try to like Tristan."  
  
"You already know him and you already like him!"  
  
"He wasn't your boyfriend when I met him."  
  
"But mom."  
  
"But Rory." she said mockingly, gliding her daughter to the door, "Now, go make conversation with your grandparents."  
  
"But-"  
  
"No buts."  
  
"But-"  
  
"Go, talk." Lorelai shut the door.  
  
"That was evil. Inviting both sets of grandparents to the first dinner. Evil mother." Chris said, still looking in the mirror.  
  
"Oh, but it will be so funny." she turned, smiling devilishly. Chris rolled his eyes and looked back in the mirror, the corners of his mouth turned slightly upward.  
  
DOWNSTAIRS  
  
The doorbell rang and Blake jumped up, excusing himself from the elders and telling his sister he'd be right back, their parents were still in the kitchen, talking to the cook. "Be nice!" Rory called as he disappeared into the foyer.  
  
"I'm always nice!" he called back. He threw the door open, smiling broadly, "Dugrey, how nice of you to visit!"  
  
Tristan rolled his eyes, "Hey Hayden." Blake laughed. "What's so funny?"  
  
"You're dating my sister now, you're free game to take cheap shots at."  
  
"You've taken cheap shots at me since I met you."  
  
"Yes, but you will recieve no mercy now."  
  
"I feel loved."  
  
"As you should." they walked into the sitting room. Blake had been sharing the love seat with Rory, but he now sat in a recliner, letting Tristan sit with her. She smiled up at Tristan as he sat down after shaking hands with her grandfathers and kissing her grandmother's hands.   
  
"Hey." he gave her a small kiss, since her grandparents were in the room.   
  
Rory smiled, "Hey."   
  
The doorbell rang for a fourth time and Blake stood up, "It's Madeline, I'll get it." After he left, they heard the door open and the couple walked in.  
  
"Hey Rory, Tristan."  
  
"Hey Maddy." the two said in unison. Lorelai and Chris walked in, Lorelai sat with her parents and Chris sat on the couch with his. The adults fell into a conversation about work while the teenagers slipped away. They walked out to the porch, walking over to Shane and his girlfriend, who'd escaped five minuets earlier.  
  
"I don't see why mom invited their parents." Blake said.  
  
Rory sighed, "Because they're fifty or something, they have no lives so mom thinks it's funny when they interrupt ours." she laid her head on Tristan's chest, closing her eyes, he wrapped his arms around her waist loosely and kissed the top of her head.  
  
Blake and Madeline were in a similar position, but her eyes were open. "Do they usually want to meet your boyfriends or girlfriends?"  
  
"Sometimes. They never liked Dean-"  
  
"Join the club."  
  
"Shut up. I don't like him either, but-" Rory was cut of when the doorbell rang again. She jumped slightly and they heard Lorelai call through the open back door.  
  
"Can you guys go get that?" Rory pushed herself off of Tristan.  
  
"I'll be right back."  
  
"Do you want one of us to go with you?" Madeline asked.  
  
"No. I'll just be a second." she went down the stairs and around the house, to the front door. The air was cool against her bare arms, reminding her that it was fall. Dead grass crunched under her feet as she walked through the dark. Wind blew her hair over her milky shoulders, causing her arms to fall to her side, letting the air every inch of exposed skin. When Rory reached the front, her stomach dropped. "Dean."  
  
He turned upon hearing her say his name, "Rory." Dean paused, looking her over.   
  
She wrapped her arms around her, feeling uncomfortable. "What do you want?"  
  
"I had to come see you."  
  
"Okay, you see me, now you can leave, bye." she turned to walk away.  
  
"Rory, wait." she stopped and turned.  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
"I have to talk to you."  
  
"I thought I told you I never wanted to talk to you or look at you again."  
  
"Rory, I was drunk! I made a mistake!"  
  
"Yeah, a pretty big mistake."   
  
"I didn't know what I was doing, that girl came up to me and I didn't even think."  
  
"No, you didn't. Dean, if you're asking me to forgive you, then I'm sorry, but I can't."  
  
He looked down, defeated, "Will you ever be able to forgive me?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"Well, maybe, in a few months, we could try again."  
  
"I don't think so."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Dean, I have a boyfriend."  
  
"What?!"  
  
"Did you really think I'd let the hurt heal and then take you back? Dean, I don't forgive easily, and after what you did, I'm not sure I can ever forgive you."  
  
"Who is it? Tristan. I bet it's Tristan."  
  
"Yeah, well, you bet right, but that doesn't change anything.""I knew it! I knew you broke up with me for him! I knew it!"  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "No. I broke up with you because you were drunk and said you wanted an 'open' relationship and you had some random girl on your lap. I want commitment. Not that."  
  
"You want commitment? You want someone who won't cheat on you? Is that why you're dating the school player? The one with a new whore every week? That one?"  
  
"Better than you."  
  
"Rory, when he sees that you won't sleep with him, he'll dump you."  
  
"How can you say that? You don't even know him."   
  
"Do you really know him?"  
  
"Yes, I do. And he's never cheated on a girl."  
  
"He just drops them all together."  
  
"Better than what you did."  
  
"I've told you, I didn't know what I was doing!"  
  
"Your problem, not mine."   
  
Tristan opened the door, "Mary, dinner's rea-" he stopped upon seeing Dean standing with his girlfriend. He closed the door and stood completely still, looking between a pissed Dean and an annoyed Rory.   
  
"Mary? How long have you been calling her that? What the hell does Mary mean?" Dean yelled.  
  
Tristan didn't answer his question but asked in a civil voice, "What the hell are you doing here Dean?"  
  
"I'm here to get Rory back."  
  
Tristan laughed, "Sorry, but that's not going to happen."  
  
"Why don't you let her speak for herself?" Dean took a step closer to his ex-girlfriend, "What do you say Rory?"  
  
Tristan could see that Rory was getting more and more upset, so he stepped between them, "I told you, you're not getting her back, she's my girlfriend now, so why don't you just go home?"  
  
Dean came closer to him, "Are you trying to piss me off, preppy?"  
  
"No, I'm trying to get you to stop stalking my girlfriend after she said she doesn't want to see you, dumb ass."  
  
"She was my girlfriend first."  
  
"Yeah, and she's mine now. So fuck off."  
  
"Look, pretty boy, you don't live here, this is my town."  
  
"And Rory is my girlfriend, so I'll tell you one more time, get the hell away. She doesn't want you here, she doesn't want you back."  
  
"Are you trying to fight me?"  
  
Tristan laughed, "You're an idiot, you know that? I could kill you."  
  
"Prove it."  
  
"I don't want to fight you."  
  
"Are you scared?"  
  
"No, I just don't want Rory to see me beat the shit out of her ex-boyfriend."  
  
"Well then maybe she'd like to see me beat the shit out of her current boyfriend."  
  
"You really want to fight me?" Tristan asked, amusement apparent in his voice.  
  
Dean took a step closer to him, "Yeah, I want to crush your preppy skull, and-"  
  
"I'd like to see you try."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Yeah, because you couldn't even get near me."  
  
"What you think that just because you're rich that means you're stronger than me?"  
  
"No, money has nothing to do with it. The fact is, I'm smarter."  
  
Hate covered Dean's face, "Or I could just beat the hell out of you and take Rory back."  
  
"If you touch Rory, I will put you through so much pain, you'll wish you were dead."  
  
"You don't know her like I do."  
  
"I know she doesn't deserve a drunk jack ass that cheats on her."  
  
"Said the player."  
  
"Yeah, a player who's never cheated on a girl in my life."   
  
"Well, there's a first for everything." his gaze fell on Rory, who was a few feet behind the blonde. "And there's a whore already in line."  
  
Tristan took at step towards Dean and said in a dangerously quiet voice, "Care to repeat that?" Even though Tristan was three inches shorter than Dean, he almost seemed to cower under the hate radiating off of Tristan.   
  
"You heard me." he said, the high note in his voice giving away his terror.  
  
"Come on bag boy, grow some balls and say it again, I'm not sure if I heard right."  
  
Dean slowly composed himself and said in a calmer voice, "I said, there's a whore in line right behind you."  
  
Tristan nodded and punched Dean squarely in the jaw, sending him reeling backwards, "Shit!" he said loudly, holding his mouth. The door opened and Blake flew out, having seen Dean a few seconds earlier. He didn't want their parents or grandparents to see Dean and Tristan fighting. He grabbed Dean's arms and held them behind his back as the taller boy lunged at Tristan who stood, shaking his head.  
  
"I'm telling you, say anything like that about Rory again, and I will personally make you bleed." he turned to follow his girlfriend to the back yard.   
  
Blake threw Dean onto the front lawn. "Get away from my house, ass hole."  
  
Tristan was rounding the corner of the house when he heard Dean call to him, "Hey preppy! I will get her back, count on it!" Tristan ignored him and kept walking. Dean turned to face Blake, "That warning goes for you too. Tell Jess." he stood up and ran from the yard while Blake just stared at his back in surprise.  
  
Tristan walked around to the back to find Rory, who'd run away when Dean called her a whore. He found her curled up into a ball on the trampoline. He crawled on beside her, lifting her head from the small hands that held it. "Hey, you know what he said wasn't true."  
  
"Wasn't it?" she asked, tears causing her makeup to run, "Tristan, I didn't even like Dean after I met you. I mean, there was a week between you. I waited almost a month to let Dean kiss me. We made out before we even started dating. I've never felt comfortable with Dean's arm around my waist, but with you, it's just normal. I never made out with Dean. Never. But with you," she looked down, "We weren't even dating, Tristan." she looked back up at him, "Don't lie and tell me that making out with a guy who ISN'T your boyfriend doesn't make you a whore."  
  
Tristan shook his head, "Rory, it's not the same. It's not like we made out at a party or anything. We knew each other and we knew how we felt. You lost interest in Dean because he's completely wrong for you. I'm not. We fit Rory. We shouldn't, you had a boyfriend, I was a player. You were pure and innocent, not jaded at all, I was raised in society, I wore a mask and was raised to never show my true feelings. You loved life and wanted to live it. I was dying inside and forgetting who I was. You saved me. You weren't supposed to. We weren't supposed to fit. But we did. We do." he said softly.   
  
Rory looked at him, tears running from her eyes. She bit her lip, "He was wrong?"  
  
"He was dead wrong. He's jealous and bitter that he lost you. He thinks that if he's not happy then you shouldn't be either. He never deserved you. You're too good for him."  
  
She looked away, "Well he's better off now. He has girls who can give him what he wants."  
  
Tristan felt a pang of jealousy, "He really hurt you, didn't he?"  
  
"Yeah." she whispered, barely audible, "I mean, it's not that I really LOVED him or anything, but I did have feelings for him. I didn't love him, but there was something there. And he broke my trust completely." Rory looked up and saw the hurt in Tristan's eyes, "But it's not like I feel anything for him anymore. I was just hurt when he did it."  
  
Tristan sighed and looked down at his hands, "I'm not going to pretend like it doesn't bother me that you had feelings like this for him. I understand he hurt you," he looked back up at her, "Rory, you know I'd do anything for you. But please, just tell me how I can make you forget about him." his voice cracked with emotion at the thought of not having all her heart.   
  
INSIDE  
  
Blake and Madeline were leaning against the door frame, staring out at the couple on the trampoline. Madeline laid her head on Blake's chest, they'd told the others that Dean had come by and they agreed to reschedule the dinner. Only Rory and Tristan knew exactly what had been said, but by the reaction, all knew it was bad.   
  
Madeline sighed, "Is she over Dean?"  
  
"God, I hope so. He was a jack ass that never deserved her in the first place. I mean look at them. Tristan's only known her for what? A month? Dean never treated her this well."  
  
"He worships her." Madeline said, smiling at her friends. "She's like a goddess to him. I hope she knows that." Blake nodded. But he wasn't sure she knew. Sometimes Rory was completely oblivious to other's feelings towards her.  
  
OUTSIDE, TRAMPOLINE  
  
"I'm over Dean, but I'm still hurt." she whispered, surprised that he'd asked that question.  
  
"How can I help you forget what he did?"  
  
"Don't hurt me."  
  
"I would never hurt you, Rory."   
  
"You can't promise that."  
  
"Why not. I would never hurt you."  
  
"You would never mean to hurt me. No one can swear they won't."  
  
Tristan tilted his head, thinking over what she'd said, he grabbed her hands gently, "If it's in my power, I will never hurt you."  
  
She gave him a teary half smile, "I know."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
There are times it seems to me  
  
I'm sharing you with memories  
  
I feel it in my heart  
  
But I don't show it, show it  
  
And then there's times you look at me  
  
As though I'm all that you can see  
  
Those times I don't believe it's right  
  
I know it, know it  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	7. Hands Down

A/N: Thanks for all you reviews, and just a question: Do you think I should change the rating of my other fic? I mean, I won't go much further than I did in the last chapter, but do you think it would be better if I changed the rating to R, or warn people in the summary that it's a strong PG-13? Please review and tell me. Anways: I don't own GG or Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
My hopes are so high   
  
that your kiss might kill me. So won't you kill me,   
  
so I die happy. My heart is yours   
  
to fill or burst   
  
or break or bury   
  
or wear as jewelry, which ever you prefer.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"I want to go to the beach." Rory sighed, flipping through her magazine.  
  
Blake rolled his eyes, "It's December Rory. There's snow outside."  
  
"Not at the beach."  
  
"Why do you want to go to the beach? You hate the beach."  
  
"I don't hate it. I just don't like it very much."  
  
"And why is that?"  
  
"Sharks."  
  
"Ah." They were sitting on opposite sides of the couch, Rory's legs on top of her brother's. It was Thursday and school had been canceled because of snow. There was a knock on the door. "What kind of maniac goes out in this?" Blake asked, not looking up from his book.   
  
Rory turned so she could see out the window. She turned back around to her magazine, "Your friends." the door opened to reveal Lane and Jess.   
  
"They're your friends too." he said, ignoring the two who'd just walked into the kitchen.   
  
"Jess, could you make coffee since you're already in there?" Rory called.  
  
"Sure."   
  
"Oh, I see. You don't trust me. Is that it?" they heard Lane ask.  
  
"Honey, I don't trust you with pouring water. You can't cook for your life."  
  
"I can cook better than you."  
  
Rory smiled, "Didn't say you couldn't." Jess walked in a few minuets later, holding a large mug out to Rory. She smiled and took it from him, "Thanks."  
  
"No problem."  
  
Blake's jaw dropped as he looked between the two, "What, I don't get any?"  
  
"I refuse to bring coffee to a guy sitting on the couch."  
  
"AH! But you brought Rory coffee!"  
  
"Blake, Blake, Blake, how many times to I have to tell you? The prettiest twin always gets whatever she wants."  
  
"Obviously not, because I don't have any coffee."   
  
"Well what does that tell you?"  
  
"He cheats?"  
  
"No, you can tell that I am the prettier twin, not you."  
  
Blake sighed, "You're in denial, it's okay, I understand."  
  
Rory nodded, "I'm sure you do." The phone rang and Rory leaned over to grab it, "Hello?"  
  
"Hey Mary."  
  
She smiled, "Hey, what's up?"  
  
"I'm sitting here, bored. Because I'm all alone."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"Yes, I think you should just come keep me company."  
  
She laughed, "Should I?"  
  
"Yes. I could keep you warm." he said suggestively.  
  
"I'm sure you could."  
  
"But poor you, I'll just have to walk across the street and keep Summer warm."  
  
"Have fun with that."  
  
"What? You're not even upset?" he asked, mocking offense.  
  
"Well, one: I know you wouldn't, because you don't have a death wish. And two: Jess is right here, he could keep me warm just as easily."  
  
"Mary! I am offended."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"Well you should be."  
  
She laughed again, "Your birthday is Friday, isn't it?"  
  
"Yes. I'll be sixteen."  
  
"How exiting."  
  
"Hm. And I can think of a present I'd really like from you, Mary."  
  
"I'm sure you can, but too bad for you, I already have one picked out, and I doubt it's what you're thinking of."  
  
"Ooh, what'd you get me?"  
  
"You have to wait until Friday."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because that's when your birthday is."  
  
"But I want it now."  
  
"Too bad. You'll just have to wait."  
  
"That's cruel Mary." he pouted.  
  
"No, you just think so."  
  
"I'm bored, entertain me."  
  
"Go have Summer entertain you."  
  
"Hm, you know I just might. I'll talk to you later, Mary."  
  
"I was kidding!" she yelled into the phone as he started to put it down.  
  
Tristan smirked, "Is Mary jealous?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Oh, I think she is."  
  
"You're so conceited."  
  
"Why thank you."  
  
"That wasn't a compliment."  
  
"Well I took it as one."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
"I win."  
  
"Never."  
  
"Mary, denial is not just a river in Egypt."  
  
She laughed, "I'm bored. Come over."  
  
"But it's cold outside."  
  
"Suck it up."  
  
"Oh that's nice." he said, laughing.  
  
Rory smiled, "I know."  
  
"But you should seriously should come over."  
  
"But I thought Jess was there."  
  
"So? I've known Jess my whole life, and quite frankly, I'm getting bored of him."  
  
"Hey!" Jess said, turning from Lane and Blake. Rory stuck her tongue out.  
  
"Oh, that's nice." Tristan said, laughing lightly.  
  
Rory sat up and looked out the window, "The snow's melting!"  
  
"I thought you loved snow."  
  
"I do, but if Jess is going to drive me to Hartford then we don't want him to have to drive on ice, do we?"  
  
"Are you serious?"  
  
"Are you home alone?"  
  
"Yeah...are you really coming to Hartford?"  
  
"Yeah, I want to go see Paris."  
  
"Okay Mary, that is just cold."  
  
"What? you didn't think I'd be alone with you in your house, did you?"  
  
"Well, I- no, no. But it's cruel to make me think you meant that."  
  
"Ha. Sorry."  
  
"I don't think you really are."  
  
"I'm not."  
  
CHILTON, FRIDAY  
  
Rory walked into the school and up to Madeline's locker, "Hey."   
  
Madeline smiled, "Hey Ror. You coming to Eden's party tonight?"  
  
She shrugged, "I dunno, if Trisan wants to then I will. If he doesn't care then I probably won't. You?"  
  
She nodded, "Definitely. Baker wants to ask Louise out officially tonight."  
  
"Finally. How long have they been hooking up for? Two months?"  
  
"Yeah, I think so," she laughed, "So what will you do other than the party?"  
  
"Probably just hang out at either mine or Tristan's house."  
  
"What about Tristan?" he asked, walking up behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her temple.  
  
"Happy birthday." she said, smiling and turning around in his arms.  
  
"You remembered." he mocked surprise, and his hands dropped to rest on her hips.  
  
"Of course I remembered."  
  
"Hey Tris, when are you having your party?" Madeline asked from behind Rory.  
  
Tristan's gaze moved from Rory to the girl behind her, "Next Friday. My parents will be in Greece."  
  
"Want me to spread the word?"  
  
"Could you?"  
  
"Sure." Madeline smiled devilishly, "LOUISE!" she called down the hall, beckoning as the blond walked entered the school. She left, waving to the couple before she disappeared.  
  
Rory turned to Tristan, "Are we going to the party tonight?"  
  
He shrugged, "Do you want to?"  
  
"I don't care, whatever you want to do."  
  
"I'd rather just the two of us hang out at my house."  
  
She nodded, "That's exactly what I was thinking."  
  
"It's amazing."  
  
"Oh yes."   
  
Tristan leaned down slowly and kissed her, turning so she was pushed into the lockers. His hands stayed on her hips while she laid her hands loosely on his chest. He slowly deepened the kiss, his hands tightening on her hips. She pulled him closer to her, until a group of people walked up, slapping Tristan in the back and forcing him to break away from Rory before he caused her head to slam back against the locker. He groaned at having to break lip contact and rolled his eyes when he realized who it was that had walked up. Baker, Henry and Blake were standing around them.   
  
"You guys have the worst timing of anyone I've ever met." she said hitting her head against the locker and keeping it there.  
  
"On the contrary, little sister, I have perfect timing. Because, see, you were making out with your boyfriend, and I broke you up, giving me perfect timing." she rolled her head to face him.  
  
"One: I'm only younger by six minuets, and two: I'll remember this next time you're making out with Maddy."  
  
"Ha. You liar."  
  
Rory smiled, shaking her head, "Trust me, I'm not."  
  
"So, Tristan is sixteen. He can drive now." Baker said, smirking.  
  
Tristan turned so he was facing them and Rory was leaning on his chest, "I could drive before."  
  
"Ah, but now you can drive without an adult. You see the difference?"  
  
"I've driven without an adult before." he said, smirking.  
  
"But illegally."  
  
"It's not illegal if you don't get caught."  
  
"Shut up. Don't make me feel stupid."  
  
"I'm not the one doing it, man." Henry, Rory, and Blake laughed, but Baker just shook his head.  
  
"So, we'll see you two at the party tonight, right?" Henry asked.  
  
Tristan shook his head, "No, we're not going."  
  
"What are you going to do then?" Baker asked, looking between them. Rory had laid her head on Tristan's chest, showing that she wasn't answering any questions.  
  
"Probably just stay at my house."  
  
"I'm not sure if I approve." Blake said automatically.  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "You aren't serious, are you?"  
  
"Deadly."  
  
She laughed slightly, "Well that's too bad for you, isn't it?"  
  
Blake laughed, "You forget that I control you, Rory."  
  
"Right."  
  
STARS HOLLOW, THAT NIGHT  
  
Jess and Lane walked in, dressed for the party. Lane left the two boys in search of Rory. She found her in her third story room. She pushed the door open and saw Rory looking in the mirror, she was wearing a men's Abercrombie hoodie and jeans. "You're wearing that to the party?" Lane asked, looking her over.  
  
Rory shook her head, "I'm not going to the party."  
  
"What? Where are you going?"  
  
"Tristan's."   
  
Lane's eyebrow arched, staring at her best friend with a confused look, "You're what?"  
  
Rory shook her head, "We're just hanging out. It's his birthday and he doesn't want to go to a party. We're not going to do anything like that."  
  
"Just making sure."  
  
"Yeah. Jess is going to drop me off at his house on the way to the party."  
  
"Does Jess know?"  
  
"No."  
  
Lane shook her head and smiled, Rory turned and smiled as well, "What?"  
  
"You." Lane linked arms with Rory and they walked downstairs.  
  
JESS'S CAR  
  
"So , Rory, I hear I'm taking you to Tristan's?" Jess said accusingly.  
  
Rory nodded, "You hear right."  
  
"And will there be supervision?"  
  
She laughed, "No. I don't think so."  
  
"Oh, I'm not sure about this." he said as he turned onto Tristan's street. "I mean, you know, no adult supervision, I just don't know."  
  
"Hm, too bad you don't have a say."  
  
"Hey. I am your master. I own you." he said playfully.  
  
Rory laughed, "No, I don't think so." They pulled into Tristan's driveway and she opened the door, "I'll see you guys later."  
  
"Bye Rory." Lane said, scooting over so she was in the middle seat.  
  
"Let him know we'll kick his ass." Blake said.   
  
Rory smirked, "I'll do that." she closed the door and walked up to his front porch. She rang the doorbell and heard it chime through the whole house.   
  
"I got it." she heard muffled through the door. It opened to reveal Tristan. He smiled, kissing her gently, "Hey."  
  
She smiled, "Hey."   
  
He pulled her in and shut the door, leaning her into it slightly and he leaned in. She smiled and rested her hands on his hips loosely as their lips met. He put his hands on either side of her face, kissing her without aggression at all. He pulled away after a moment, "What do you want to do?"  
  
She shrugged, shaking her head slightly, "Dunno. Doesn't matter to me."  
  
"Well, we could watch a movie, we could eat, or we could go some place, or...we could just talk."  
  
"Let's go upstairs."  
  
"Okay." he took her hand and led her to his room, sitting on the bed and she sat beside him, laying down.  
  
  
  
THE PARTY  
  
Madeline and Blake were standing with Baker and Louise in the living room, "So tell me again why Rory and Tristan aren't here." she said.  
  
"It's his birthday and he didn't want to come to a big party. I guess he just wanted to spend it with Rory." Blake explained.  
  
"Damn he's changed." Baker said, Louise and Madeline nodded in agreement.  
  
"It's weird, I mean, he's having his party next week, but usually he just has his party on his birthday. I think the only reason he'd doing it is because if he didn't then someone else would throw one and say it was for him." Louise said.  
  
Blake shrugged, "I haven't known him for that long, so I wouldn't know."  
  
"Trust us, he's been really different since he met your sister."   
  
Blake looked between them, "How so?"  
  
"He's just..." Louise trailed off, "Different."  
  
He nodded, "I got that. How's he different?"  
  
"It's just, see, Tristan is, as you know, definitely a player. At least he was a player. And then he met Rory and he completely changed. In a good way. He's the same person he always was, just different. Happier everything. But he still has his parents to deal with. He doesn't like them that much. Well, you've met them, you know."  
  
Blake laughed bitterly, "Yeah. I know. They hated my parents and they hate me and Rory."  
  
"Of course they do. Your parents were better than them at everything, and now they think you two will do better than Tristan at everything. Same thing with your grandparents, didn't you know?" Blake shook his head. Louise continued, "Even your and Tristan's grandparents went to school together. His father's parents and your dad's parents were friends. But they were always competing. They were all eight in two of the elite groups. They all got along and are still friends, but Tristan's mother has never gotten over the fact that your mom got homecoming queen instead of her when you dad put Lorelai's name on there to any his girlfriend. She's still bitter."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Oh yeah, I'm surprised you didn't know."  
  
"But I don't compete with Tristan, we're not threats to each other."  
  
Louise shrugged, "She doesn't know that. She never bothers to ask Tristan anything."   
  
TRISTAN AND RORY  
  
They were in the car, on the way to Stars Hollow. Rory laughed, "You know, it's illegal for you to be driving me."  
  
Tristan shrugged, "Eh, you'll live."  
  
She laughed, "Not if you get in a wreck because you are inexperienced."  
  
"Are you saying you don't trust me?" he asked, mocking offense.  
  
"Um, yeah. Just a little." He laughed, swerving the car slightly. Rory narrowed her eyes, "Do that again Dugrey, and you won't be capable of having children."  
  
"Ouch. That's harsh Mary."  
  
"Yes, well, you would have done it to yourself, because if I die, you're comin' down with me."  
  
He laughed, "I'm sure."  
  
"Oh, you better be, buddy, you better be."  
  
"And why id that?"  
  
"Because, if I die by your hands, I will come back to haunt you for your whole damn life."   
  
He shook his head, "I'd never let anything happen to you, Mary." he said, glancing at her and locking eyes before looking back to the rode.   
  
She kept looking at the profile of his face for a few minuets before whispering, "I know."  
  
They drove for fifteen more minuets before turning onto the Stars Hollow exit, "So, tell me again where we're going."  
  
"Luke's."  
  
"To eat?"  
  
"No. I don't want to go home yet, but we want to go to Stars Hollow."  
  
"Do we?"  
  
"Yes, my parents are home, so we won't go there, but the diner is perfect. Jess is at the party, ad he's spending the night with Blake, and Luke is on a cruise with Rachel, so the apartment is perfect."  
  
"And Luke won't mind?"  
  
"Tristan, Tristan, Tristan, Luke loves me like his own flesh and blood, I'm aloud to use the apartment whenever I want, he doesn't care, besides, we'll just be in Jess's room."  
  
"Would he care if he knew you were going there to be alone with your boyfriend?"  
  
"Yes."   
  
Tristan laughed, "What about Cesar?"  
  
"The diner closes at eleven."  
  
"And what time is it?"  
  
She looked at the time on the dash board, "Eleven thirty."  
  
He nodded, pulling into the deserted parking lot. Tristan turned off the engine, "Now how do you propose we get in?"   
  
Rory nodded to the second story, "Jess's window is always unlocked."  
  
"So...we're going in through his window?"  
  
"He won't care. After Luke and Rachel got married, they added a wall to give Jess his own room. We'll just stay in there."  
  
He shook his head, "You really thought this through, didn't you?"  
  
She smirked, "Only a little." He got out and came around to her side, opening the door for her. She smiled and took his offered hand, kissing his cheek lightly. The dark sky was full of clouds and there was a light rain, but it seemed as if the storm was just about to begin.   
  
He followed her around back to see her climbing up the trellis to an open window. He smirked and followed her after she'd gone through. He saw her standing in a small room, with posters on the walls and books and magazines piled against the walls. There was a stereo and a large collection of CD's beside it. There was no bed frame, just a mattress with black sheets laid on the floor. Tristan looked around the room, it was definitely.....Jess, was the only word to describe it.   
  
Rory turned on one of the soft lamps and the stereo. Tristan sat on Jess's bed and Rory sat beside him, laying in his arms. "Now, isn't this better than sitting in a mansion with our parents in the house?"  
  
He nodded, "Definitely." Tristan looked out the window, "It's raining hard."  
  
Rory relaxed completely, "Good."  
  
Later, Rory was looking through Jess's book collection, twirling her hair absent mindedly. She looked up to see Tristan smirking and shaking his head, "What?"  
  
"So do you just come here and go through his stuff all the time?"  
  
"Not all the time. Just sometimes." she said, smiling.  
  
Tristan sat up and rested his head on his fist, "We should probably go. The rain's let up."  
  
Rory looked out the window, sighing, "Yeah. And I'm tired, what time is it?"   
  
"Um..." Tristan glanced at the clock, "One thirty."  
  
Her head shot up, "Really?"  
  
"Yup."  
  
"Yeah, we should go." she stood up and held her hand out to him. They walked slowly down the wet streets, deciding they'd rather go by foot that drive. She laced her fingers with his, looking up at him and smiling. When they came to her house, she found that the gate was locked. Tristan's jaw dropped and he stared at her. She stood in shock for a moment before realizing the irony of the situation and bursting into laughter.   
  
Tristan shook his head, "What's so funny?"  
  
"Oh my God, I completely forgot that the gate automatically locks at one thirty."  
  
"Isn't there a code you and push or something?"  
  
She shook her head, "We each have a card to open it," she pointed to a thin slot in the brick, "There's also a long code printed on the card to unlock it," she pointed to a key pad, "But we changed the code last week and my card in my wallet, which is in the house. The only other way to open it from outside the house is a button on the other side."  
  
Tristan laughed, "Are you serious?"  
  
"Completely. And this fence is really hard to get over. Trust me."  
  
He bit his lip, looking it over. He shook his head, "Hang on." he climbed over the tall fence with little difficulty, disappearing from view for a moment. Rory stood in silence, Blake had been trying for years to jump that fence, and Tristan had accomplished it in one try. The gate slid open to reveal Tristan. She smiled, hugging him tightly. She walked to the door, holding his hand tightly. She pushed the door open slowly, looking around the foyer, no one was visible. She turned back to Tristan, smiling. He smiled back. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him gently. His hands slid around her waist, holding her close.  
  
Rory slowly broke away, opening her eyes, she smiled, "Hey."  
  
"Hey."  
  
She looked down, the smile dropping from her face, "Tristan?"  
  
"Hm?"  
  
"How do you feel?" she looked up to see a confused expression on his face, "I mean, how do you feel about us? Do you think that we're going to be together for along time?"  
  
He smiled slightly, "That depends on how you feel, because it's all up to you. Why?"  
  
"Because, I know how I feel, but I need to know how you feel. I mean, I don't want to get too involved and end up with a broken heart."  
  
"You won't." he said automatically.  
  
She smiled, tilting her head, "Ah, you say that now, but the question is: How will you feel in two months?"  
  
All humor slowly left his face and he looked into her eyes, "It depends on whether love really fades or not."   
  
Rory's smile fell and she stared at him, "What?"  
  
He didn't answer, just stared at her, "You know what I said." he whispered, it wasn't harsh, just a fact.  
  
"I-I-wh-what?"  
  
"Cause see, I know how I feel. The question is: how do you feel?"  
  
She shook her head, looking down, "What do you mean, you love me?"   
  
His hands dropped from her waist and he turned around, running his hands through his hair, "Forget about it. Just- forget I said it."  
  
She shook her head, grabbing his arm before he could walk away, "Do you mean it?"  
  
He turned to face her, "What?"  
  
"Do you really love me?"  
  
He bit his bottom lip, "If you don't know the answer to that then there's no point in me answering." She searched his eyes, hoping for anything that could comfort her, any sign to point her in the right direction, but his eyes were like glass, his walls had gone up when she hadn't believed him. When she said nothing, he turned away, a look of rejection an his face. He turned, but before he could move, she jumped in front of him and crushed her lips to his, kissing him intently, she laid her hands on his waist.   
  
He was caught off guard for a moment but recovered, holding her face gently. His finger became tangled in her hair and her hands trailed up his rock hard abs to rest on his chest. Tristan's hands moved down her back to rest on her hips, pulling her close. He was shocked, Rory never made the first move, it wasn't her style. She was more of a follower when it came to making out. But he wasn't complaining, aggressive Rory was good, and there was something different about the way she was kissing him tonight, usually it was a sign of affection, but this wasn't so much that. It was more like she was showing him how he made her feel, telling him that she meant it when she said how she felt. She was making it clear that no matter what, she'd always be his girl.  
  
They pulled away, opening their eyes slowly, "How do you think I feel?" she asked breathlessly.  
  
Tristan had the same winded quality, "I can guess, but I'd rather have you tell me." She smiled and closed her eyes, looking down at her feet. He put two fingers under her chin and lifted it up, "What do you feel?"  
  
She sighed, "I'm not sure what it is, but if I had to put a name to it, then I'd say," Rory smiled at him, "This is most definitely what it feels like to be in love."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  
Hands down this is the best day   
  
I can ever remember I'll always remember   
  
The sound of the stereo   
  
The dim of the soft lights The scent of your hair   
  
That you twirled in your fingers And the time on the clock   
  
When we realized it's so late And this walk that we shared together The streets were wet   
  
And the gate was locked   
  
So I jumped it, and I let you in And you stood at the door   
  
With your hands on my waist And you kissed me like you meant it And I knew that you meant it   
  
That you meant it  
  
That you meant it  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	8. One Week

A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or 'One Week' by the Barenaked Ladies.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad  
  
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad  
  
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral  
  
Can't understand what I mean?  
  
Well, you soon will  
  
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve  
  
I have a history of taking off my shirt  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Suspended?" Rory practically screamed in the principle's office.  
  
"Miss Hayden, please keep your voice down!" he hissed.  
  
"But-but-you-I don't get suspended."  
  
"Looks like you do now."   
  
"Shut up." she growled at her smirking brother.  
  
"Sir, it was just one little harmless prank." Tristan said, leaning forward, although he couldn't help smirking.  
  
Charleston ignored him, "So, Miss Gellar, what's your defense?"  
  
She shrugged, "I was bored."  
  
"But no one got hurt." Blake pointed out. "It really was harmless."  
  
The man's eyebrows arched, "You call turning your absent teacher's classroom into a petting zoo, and charging students for admission, harmless?"  
  
"WE didn't do it. The portable petting zoo guys did." Tristan defended.  
  
"We weren't able to get a substitute teacher for that class. All you had to do was sit in the library for and hour and fifteen minutes but you couldn't do that." he pinched the bridge of his nose to fight off his rising migraine.  
  
"If you leave thirty sixteen year olds in a library unattended, you should plan for this type of thing to happen." Rory said, leaning back in her chair.  
  
"I am not discussing this with you. The four of you are suspended next week, and your lucky I don't expel you." Tristan rolled his eyes, the threat of being expelled was getting a little old. "What was that Mister Dugrey?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"You four can go." he held the slips out to them, "Take these to the front desk." they took the papers from him and exited his office.   
  
They handed the woman at the front desk their slips and she pulled the pink copy off the back, handing them the white and yellow ones. "Get these signed and bring the yellow one back tomorrow." she looked back down to her papers, showing them they should leave.   
  
They walked down the hall in silence, until Blake and Tristan erupted into laughter. "What's so funny?" Paris asked.  
  
"We're actually suspended." Blake said, calming down.  
  
"That's not funny!" Rory shook her head.  
  
"No Rory, it's hilarious." Blake said, laughing again.  
  
She looked from her brother to her boyfriend in disbelief, then to Paris who shook her head with an amused look. She and Rory locked eyes before laughing as well. Rory pushed her gently, for some strange reason, none of them could stop laughing.  
  
CAFETERIA  
  
They walked into the cafeteria to sit at their normal table. "So, what's the verdict?" Baker asked when they sat down.  
  
"Suspended." Blake smirked.  
  
"How long?" Louise asked.  
  
"One week." Rory said simply.  
  
"That's harsh." Henry said.  
  
Blake leaned back in his chair, "Mom and dad will love this."  
  
Madeline grimaced, "Sorry."  
  
"No. He's serious," Rory said, "they'll love it. They'll think it's hilarious and be glad that we're living up to the Hayden and Gilmore names."  
  
HAYDEN HOME, THAT AFTERNOON  
  
Tristan walked up to the door, knocking three times. The door swung opened to reveal Shane, "Oh. Hey Tristan."  
  
"Hey Shane."  
  
"You know, you don't have to knock. You can just open the door. We don't lock it during the day."  
  
He nodded, "Ah. Thanks."  
  
He nodded, "Blake is with Jess and Rory's upstairs, I think. My parents are both at work, none of the help is working today, and I'm about to go to my friend's house."  
  
"Alright. Thanks."  
  
"Bye."  
  
"Bye, Shane." Tristan walked in and the thirteen year old closed the door behind him as he left.  
  
Tristan looked around, and was about to walk upstairs when someone tackled him. He flew forward and landed on the ground, someone collapsing on top of him. He rolled over and Rory fell off of him with a squeak. He looked at her in disbelief, his mouth open. Neither said anything for a few minutes, Rory just smirked until he finally spoke. "Ow."  
  
She laughed, "What's wrong?"  
  
"Well, my girlfriend just tackled me. And I think I probably have severe rug burn."  
  
She patted his cheek, "I'm sorry."  
  
"No you're not."  
  
She shook her head and grabbed his hand, "Come on, let's go."  
  
"Where are we going?"  
  
"The diner."  
  
"Oh yeah, the whole staff has the day off, right?"  
  
"Yes. And I don't cook. Luke does. Jess can too, actually."  
  
"Well he does work in a diner."  
  
"Silence." she opened the door and pulled him through.  
  
"Wait." Tristan froze, causing Rory to stop.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Will Dean be there?"  
  
"He might. This is a very small town."  
  
Tristan nodded, "Great." but he continued walking.   
  
They walked into the diner to see Jess and Blake at one of the booths, talking quietly. As they neared, they heard the last strands of the conversation. "Are you sure it was her?" Jess asked.  
  
"Positive." Blake answered with an unusually serious look. Jess bit his lip, looking worried.  
  
"What's wrong?" Rory asked.  
  
Both boys jumped in surprise at seeing the couple, "Nothing." Jess answered immediately.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Yeah. Come on, sit." Blake pointed to the bench where Jess was sitting.  
  
"Yes. What do you two want? I'll get it for you." Jess stood up and pulled the notepad from his pocket. Rory and Tristan looked between them before sitting down.  
  
"Okay, what do you want?" Jess asked.  
  
"Coffee."  
  
He smiled, "Of course."  
  
"And my usual."  
  
He nodded, "Tristan?"  
  
But before he could answer the door opened and Dean walked in, his arm around a girl. Rory couldn't see her face, but she seemed somewhat familiar. Tristan saw her face before Rory did, and his jaw dropped. When she finally saw her, Rory wasn't surprised at Tristan's reaction. Dean had his arm around none other than Summer. Rory's eyebrows drew together in confusion. Why in the world would Summer want to be with Dean?  
  
Tristan turned to Rory, "That's really there, right?" she nodded mutely. "Good, just making sure I wasn't imagining things."  
  
Rory shook her head, "When I told him to date Chilton whores, I didn't think he'd take it seriously." Tristan smiled, amused as Dean and Summer walked over.  
  
Summer's smile was sickeningly sweet. "Hey Tristan. Rory."  
  
"Hi Summer." Rory said, looking at the couple questioningly. Tristan just nodded. "So..." Rory said after a few tense minutes, "um, how long have you two been dating?"  
  
"Two weeks." Dean tightened his grip on Summer.  
  
"Really? Um, I didn't know you were dating anyone Dean."  
  
"What? Did you think I was still hung up on you?"  
  
Rory shook her head, "No. Nope I didn't."  
  
"Rory, can I talk to you for a second?" Summer asked, motioning towards the door.  
  
"Sure." Rory said uncertainly, following her outside.   
  
When they got there, Summer turned around, smiling with sugar coated poison, "You know, I just want to say, no hard feelings."  
  
"No hard feelings about what?"  
  
"You know, I'm dating Dean, you're dating Tristan. I just wanted you to know that I don't hold it against you. I don't hate you for it."  
  
Rory nodded, "That's um, that's good to know. Thank you." she said uncertainly.  
  
"But of course, you would probably be the upset one."  
  
"Why is that?"  
  
"Because you never slept with Dean." Rory's eyes widened, she hadn't even thought about Tristan and Summer, not like...that. "Oh," Summer mock sympathized, "Tristan didn't mention that, did he?" Rory didn't answer. "Oh, well I just feel bad now."  
  
Rory shook her head, "Don't. And your right. No hard feelings."  
  
Summer's smile faltered before becoming plastered on her face, "What?"  
  
"I'm not mad at you. Or Tristan. It's in the past, right? No forgiveness needed. No hard feelings."  
  
Summer nodded, "R-right."  
  
"Is that all you wanted to say?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Alright then, let's go back inside." she opened the door and Summer walked in, sitting beside Dean. Rory sat next to Tristan. Blake had gotten up after Dean sat down, not wanting to be near him. Rory looked at Tristan with a look that clearly said, 'we need to talk'. Blake pulled up a chair and sat on the end.   
  
Jess brought their food, and when he set down Dean's, he looked up, "I didn't order this."  
  
"Yes you did."  
  
"No. I didn't."  
  
"Well, what do you want me to do? It's already made."  
  
"Um, I dunno..take it back?!"  
  
"But you ordered it!"  
  
"No I didn't!"  
  
"Tristan, did he not order this?"  
  
"Yup. He ordered it all right."  
  
"No I didn't. This is horrible service."  
  
"Then why not just never come back?" Jess asked, picking up the plate."  
  
"That's actually a good idea. Come on Summer, let's go." she stood up and followed Dean out.  
  
"Bye bye." Jess called to his retreating back, waving. Blake put the chair back and sat across from Rory and Tristan.   
  
Lane walked in an collapsed on the bench beside Blake, "I'm am seceding from my family."  
  
Blake laughed, "Why?"  
  
"They're setting up a dinner to get 'more aquatinted' with Henry."  
  
Rory and Jess both erupted into laughter, just imagining how priceless that would be. Tristan, who'd never met Lane's parents, didn't understand. "Damn, I would LOVE to be a fly on the wall for that." Jess said, out of breath.  
  
"It's not funny!"  
  
"Give him my condolences." Blake said.  
  
Lane glared at them, "My parents will eat him alive and then spit him back out. He's not ready for this!"  
  
"Maybe they'll be nice." Rory tried.  
  
"Have you ever met them?" Lane asked her best friend. She sighed, "I have to go, I need to prepare them and call Henry, tell him how to answer their questions."  
  
"Does your mom know you're here?" Tristan asked.  
  
"No. She thinks I'm on the phone with my perfect cousin."  
  
"Who?"  
  
"Mani. She lives in Korea. You've met her, remember?"  
  
"Ohh. That girl?" Rory asked. Lane nodded. "Hee hee. Love her." Rory said sarcastically.  
  
She nodded, "I know. Just be glad you aren't related to her." she looked at Jess, "Back door, please?" he nodded. "Thanks. I'll see you guys tomorrow."  
  
"We should go too." Rory grabbed Tristan's hand, "I'll see you at home, Blake. Bye Jess." all the boys said bye in unison. Tristan and Rory exited the diner and walked down the street in silence for a few minuets.   
  
"What did she say to you?" Tristan asked, finally breaking the silence as they walked into the house.  
  
"Something you should have told me."  
  
"What was it?"  
  
Rory ignored his question, "You know, I didn't even think about it, but I can't figure out why. I knew that it happened, but I just didn't connect it."  
  
"Connect what?!"  
  
Rory stopped, turning to him, "You never told me you slept with her."  
  
Tristan froze, eyes widening, "That's what she told you?"  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "Obviously."  
  
"Why would she do that?"  
  
"What I can't figure out is why you didn't."  
  
"Why is this upsetting you? You knew I wasn't a virgin when I asked you out."  
  
"I know! But I didn't think I'd ever have to deal with them telling me!" he laughed, unable to stop himself. "This isn't funny!" she yelled, "I'm REALLY mad right now, and it's because of you!"  
  
He smirked, "The only reason you heard anything from them was because Summer's a bitch. And why are you so mad at me?"  
  
"Because you should have told me!"  
  
"Oh, that would have been a lovely conversation. 'Hey Rory, by the way, I fucked Summer, just to tell you'? Yeah, that's a great conversation starter right there!"  
  
"I just think you should have told me, I mean, I am your girlfriend, and it would be nice to know that kind of thing!"  
  
"But you know it didn't matter. You know Summer meant nothing to me!"  
  
"Do I?"  
  
"I sure as hell hope so!"  
  
"Well then, you're wasting your time!"  
  
"Rory, it was in the past! I'm with you now, not Summer!"  
  
Rory's head cocked to the side, "I'm not going to pretend that I'm happy about it. In fact, I'm really pissed."  
  
"I'm sixteen years old! Go find ten sixteen year old virgins in Chilton! I guarantee you that you can't!"  
  
"I'm a virgin!"  
  
"You were with Dean, it's not all that unbelievable!"  
  
"You know what? I'm done talking to you, I'm tired and I'm mad, so let's just stop!"  
  
"Stop what?"  
  
"Everything. We're going way too fast. We have to stop or slow down or something!"  
  
"So what are you saying? You want to break up?"  
  
"Not break up, just, stop."  
  
"That's called breaking up."  
  
"It's just-it's too much Tristan. I'm tired. And I know you are. I'm mad and you're mad, let's just stop."  
  
He laughed bitterly, "are you serious?"  
  
"I don't want to talk to you right now. When you get it together and understand that there are something you need to tell your girlfriend, then I'll talk to you."  
  
He looked away, "Fine. Whatever. I'm going home. See you tomorrow."  
  
"Bye." she walked up to her room while Tristan walked to his car, both slamming their doors as he sped away.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It's been one week since you looked at me  
  
Cocked your head to the side and said "I'm angry"  
  
Five days since you laughed at me saying  
  
"Get that together, come back and see me"  
  
Three days since the living room  
  
I realized it's all my fault but couldn't tell you  
  
Yesterday you'd forgiven me  
  
But it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 


	9. The Reason

A/N: I don't own 'The Reason' by Hoobastank  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I'm not a perfect person  
  
As many things I wish I didn't do  
  
But I continue learning  
  
I never meant to do those things to you  
  
And so I have to say before I go  
  
That I just want you to know  
  
I've found a reason for me   
  
To change who I used to be  
  
A reason to start over new  
  
And the reason is you  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rory sat in bed, staring at the ceiling, waiting for someone to come in her room and tell her she needed to get ready for school, but after almost half an hour, realized that she was suspended. So she tried to climb out, but realized too late that she was extremely tangled up in covers, and fell on the ground in a heap. Oh yeah, that was definitely going to leave a bruise on her hip. She crawled out of her room and across the hall, into Blake's room, laying beside him.   
  
He rolled over, awake, but still deathly tired. "Hey." he yawned.  
  
"Hey." Rory whispered.   
  
"So...you and Tristan?" she nodded. "What happened?"  
  
She shook her head, "I mean, I knew what happened with Summer. But when I actually heard it, I just snapped."  
  
"Why? Like you said, you knew."  
  
"I know. I just...I can't handle Summer. She's a headache."  
  
"Well yeah. It's what she prides herself on. I'm just surprised that you let her get to you."  
  
Rory sighed deeply, closing her eyes, "I dunno. Everything is an emotional rollercoaster. Especially everything with Tristan."   
  
"Which is exactly why he needs you. He's going insane. I mean, have you seen the way the guy lives?"   
  
Rory buried her head in the pillow, "Yes." was the muffled reply.  
  
"So don't give up on him yet, okay?" She nodded, not looking up from the pillow.  
  
WEDNESDAY, COUNTRY CLUB  
  
Rory sat on the extremely uncomfortable chair, chin resting on her hand. She sighed deeply, watching Madeline and Blake dancing. She hated these things, they were so boring, and last time it hadn't been that bad because Tristan had been with her. Now he was somewhere on the other side of the room. Her head was throbbing from being pounded with music for the last hour since dinner ended. Shane came and sat beside her, his girlfriend was out of town for the weekend and none of his friends were here, so he was bored out of his scull.  
  
She glanced over at him, nodding, before turning back. She was surprised when he asked, "So when are you two ever going to make up?"  
  
"What?" she asked, turning to look at him.  
  
"You heard me."  
  
"I have no idea what you're talking about."  
  
"Yes you do. You're over it, but you refuse to let it go. By the way, it was a stupid thing to fight over."  
  
"Thanks. That means a lot coming from my thirteen year old brother." she said sarcastically.  
  
He shrugged, "I might only be thirteen, but I'm in a healthier relationship than you." Rory opened her mouth to bite back, but nothing came, so she closed her mouth and turned back around grumpily.  
  
"Oh, Rory, there you are," Emily said, coming up to them.  
  
"Hey Grandma."  
  
"Come with me."  
  
"What? Where are we going?"  
  
"Too many questions. Just come." She grabbed Rory's hand and pulled her along. Rory looked back at Shane, who just shrugged, grinning. Emily finally let go of Rory in front of an older woman, around her grandmother's own age, perhaps a few years older. "Rory, I'd like you to meet my friend Albany. Albany, this is my granddaughter Rory."  
  
She grabbed Rory's outstretched hand, "It's good to meet you, Rory."  
  
She nodded, "You too, Mrs..." she trailed off.  
  
"Dugrey."  
  
"Ahh." she tried to cover up her grimace.  
  
"I see you've met my grandson."  
  
Rory laughed, "Yes, I have."  
  
"He give you a bad idea about us? Or you may have met my offspring and that nun he chose to marry."  
  
"All three, actually."  
  
"Yes. Tristan can actually be quite a joy, but his parents are a lost cause."  
  
Rory smiled and opened her mouth to reply, but was cut off as her grandfather joined the group, accompanied by an older man and a teenager. "Rory," Richard said, trying and failing to act surprised to see her, "well, isn't this a pleasant surprise?"  
  
"Hi grandpa."  
  
"Richard, are you planing on introducing me to this beautiful young lady?" the man asked.  
  
"Oh, yes, Janlen, this is my granddaughter, Rory, Rory, this is my good friend Janlen Dugrey, and I believe you know his grandson Tristan."  
  
She looked over to see that Tristan was uncomfortable, but masking it well. "Yes, I do." she said, not taking her eyes off him.  
  
"Oh, do you go to Chilton together?" his grandmother asked.  
  
"Yes, we do." Tristan spoke at last.  
  
"Well isn't this nice?" Albany smiled.  
  
"Say, I have an idea."  
  
"What's your idea grandma?" Rory asked, following along with her little game.  
  
"Well, I just love this song. Why don't you two have a dance."  
  
"I don't think that's such a good idea." Tristan said quickly.  
  
"Oh, why not?" Albany butted in, "You could get to know each other better."  
  
"And I want a picture." Emily said, smiling between them.  
  
"Just one dance, that's not too much to ask for two old women, is it?"  
  
Rory wrinkled her nose, glancing at Tristan questioningly, who shrugged. She sighed, "Okay, why not?"  
  
Emily smiled, "Well go on before it's over!" they scooted the two together and pushed them towards the middle of the floor.  
  
Tristan breathed in deeply and wrapped one arm around Rory's waist, taking her hand in his own and she rested her second hand on his shoulder. They looked at separate corners of the room, not meeting each other's gaze. After a few moments Rory spoke up, "So, how horrible are they at acting?"  
  
He looked at her, "They definitely shouldn't give up their day jobs."  
  
She laughed, "No, definitely not."  
  
They moved until silence until he said, "So, what have you been doing for a week?"  
  
She sighed thinking, "Umm...sleeping...eating...listening to music...laughing at Shane because he's a good kid that never gets in trouble."  
  
Tristan laughed, "Sounds like fun."  
  
"Oh, it is. What about you?"  
  
"Same, minus laughing at the thirteen year old."  
  
"Nice."  
  
"Yeah." he nodded and they fell back into a comfortable silence until the song ended.  
  
Rory pulled away, and walked over to her grandmother, followed closely by Tristan. "There, happy?"  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about." Emily said, smiling innocently.  
  
Rory rolled her eyes, "Grandma, you can't lie to me, you never could."  
  
"I have nothing to lie about, silly."  
  
"Right, grandma. Don't try to fool the master."  
  
"I'd never dream of it." she said, "Albany, let's go for a walk, I'm getting rather warm and I'd love to see the rose gardens." Tristan's grandmother nodded and they walked through the doors, leaving the teenagers alone.  
  
Rory turned to Tristan, "What now?"  
  
"I think we should talk." she nodded. "But not here." Rory followed him out to one of the deserted balconies. She leaned against the rail, and he leaned beside her, not looking over. Rory looked down, swallowing the lump in her throat. She shivered in the December air, snow flurries falling around them. Tristan noticed her shaking and slipped off his jacket, putting it over her. She smiled in thanks and looked over the grounds. They stood in silence until he finally said, "Okay, I need to move or else I'm going to freeze to death. Want to walk?"  
  
Rory glanced down at her shoes before nodding, she might get a blister, but what the hell? "Sure." she followed him down the stairs and onto the frozen grounds. They walked down one of the paths until she said, "So, are we going to initiate conversation or just walk around aimlessly?"   
  
He grinned, "Well, I was planing on conversing."  
  
"Wonderful."  
  
"I thought so too."  
  
She smiled, "So, what were you planning on conversing about?"  
  
"Friday."  
  
"Oh, yes." she grimaced, "Friday."  
  
Tristan stopped walking and turned to her, "Okay, I'll probably be really bad at this because I've never talked through a relationship problem before in my life."  
  
Rory laughed, "Okay, talk."  
  
"Honestly, I don't know where to start."  
  
She thought for a moment, "Why don't we start with the Summer conversation."  
  
"Alright, thank you."  
  
"No problem."  
  
He breathed in deeply, "Just hear me out, okay?" she nodded, "I did sleep with Summer, but it was back in Freshman year, at the beginning. Almost a year ago, even. She never meant anything to me, we only dated for a month, and then I broke up with her. That's when I got labeled a player. She thought I broke up with her because I'd gotten what I wanted, but I really broke up with her because there was nothing to the relationship. And no matter what she made you think, it only happened once." he stopped, showing her he was done.  
  
She nodded, "You never had feelings for her?"  
  
He thought for a moment, "Actually, I did, at first, but they'd started to fade before anything happened."  
  
Rory looked down, "She still has feelings for you."  
  
"She wants revenge." he corrected. "So she's trying to ruin you."  
  
She looked up, "Well it's working."  
  
Tristan stepped closer, she was obviously upset, "Why are you letting it?"  
  
She closed her eyes, tears filling them, "Because I don't know how to stop it." she whispered, covering her face with a porcelain hand. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against his chest, stroking her hair gently and whispering into her ear. Her words came out choked, "I just-I can't handle to hear her talk about you like that, like you belonged to her, and I don't even want to think about you with another girl...and I can't not be with you, because you thought I wasn't over Dean and then I was and it's only because of you, and now Summer's with him and it's like she want to take away everything and everyone from me, and I am so scared that you're going to choose her over me because I'm not good enough or because I'm a virgin and I'm so inexperienced and she isn't-"  
  
"Whoa, hold on a second," he cut her off, moving so he was looking into her eyes, "What are you talking about? I would never choose Summer over you. All that happened before I even met you." he said it in a way that left no room for doubt as he wiped the tears away gently with his thumb. "Rory, I'm not going to pretend like I didn't do things I regret. I've made a lot of mistakes, but I don't want to anymore, and that's all because of you, I want to be better for you." he whispered.  
  
She looked up at him from under thick lashes, her hands gripping onto his upperarms while he had one arm wrapped around her waist and the other resting on her cheek gently. She looked down, sliding her hands from his arms to his neck, resting her forehead on his shoulder. He moved both his arms to her waist and tightened his grip on her. Her neck was too tempting to be left alone, so he placed comforting, feather light kisses all along it gently. She looked up at Tristan and he leaned down, looking in her eyes until their lips met in a soft kiss. He deepened it with her consent and pulled her closer. Rory pulled away to breathe, but Tristan reclaimed her lips a second later. They pulled back every so often for breath, but always came back for more.   
  
"I love you." she whispered between kisses breathlessly. Tristan smiled against her lips, replying by pulling her closer and kissing her deeper. She froze, pulling away, "What time is it?"  
  
Tristan looked at his watch, "Eleven, why?"  
  
"I have to go." she started to pull away, but he pulled her back.  
  
"What? Why?"  
  
"My parents don't know where I am. They'll be wondering-"  
  
"Rory, I can drive you home."  
  
"I know, but they won't know where I am."  
  
He let go of her hand reluctantly, "Okay."  
  
She kissed him lightly, "Walk me back?" he nodded, following her through the gardens.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I've found a reason for me   
  
To change who I used to be  
  
A reason to start over new  
  
And the reason is you  
  
I've found a reason to show  
  
A side of me that you didn't know  
  
A reason for all that I do  
  
And the reason is you  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	10. Echo

A/N: I don't own 'Echo' by Trapt.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Do I expect to change   
  
The past I hold inside  
  
With all the words I say  
  
Repeating over in my mind  
  
Some things you can't erase,   
  
No matter how hard you try  
  
An exit to escape  
  
Is all that there is left to find   
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Rory sat on Louise's bed Thursday night, thinking to herself and flipping through a magazine as the blonde went through all of her clothes to try to find something to wear to Tristan's party.   
  
She looked up at Rory, "What do you think about this?"  
  
Rory looked from the latest issue of Seventeen, the only magazine she could find in her friend's room. She glanced over at the tight jeans and teal shirt that said 'More Parties, More Boys, More Kissing'. She shrugged, looking down, "Baker'll rip it off after about an hour so what's it matter anyway?"  
  
Louise laughed, "Just tell me what you think."  
  
"It looks great." she said, without looking back up.  
  
"You pick something."  
  
Rory looked up, "You're on birth control, right?"  
  
Louise whipped around, surprised by the question out of nowhere, "What?"  
  
"You're on birth control."  
  
"Yeah..." she trailed off, unsure where this was going.  
  
"And your parents don't care?"  
  
"They don't know." she sat beside Rory, "Why? You want to go on birth control?"  
  
"I've been thinking about it." she said, looking down.  
  
"Did Tristan say something?" she asked softly.  
  
"No." she said quickly, "I mean, I know he wants to, but I don't know..."  
  
"Do you want to?"  
  
"Kind of. I don't spend hours contemplating it or anything, but I really want to give him that, I don't know why, though."  
  
Louise smiled, "Only have sex with him if it's what you want. He would rather you want it just as much as him."  
  
Rory nodded, "How did you get a prescription without your parent's permission?"  
  
"There's a clinic about fifteen minutes away that gives teenage girls birth control without parental permission."  
  
"Where?"  
  
"Hartford. I could take you. When do you want to go?"  
  
Rory shrugged, "How late are they open?"  
  
"Until seven. We have two hours, come on." she grabbed her keys and Rory followed her out the door.  
  
Rory sat in the examination room, Louise standing beside her. She looked down at the sheet they'd asked her fill out.  
  
Name: Rory Hayden  
  
Age: 15  
  
Height: 5' 5"  
  
Weight: 110 lbs.  
  
She filled out the rest of the sheet, occasionally asking Louise a question. The doctor walked back in ten minutes later and took the sheet from her. He looked over it and asked a few questions before he did a normal physical exam. He nodded, handing her a prescription paper, "Take one everyday at the same time. I'd suggest with your breakfast or right before you go to bed. And just take this to any pharmacy, they'll get it for you. When you run out come back and we'll do another exam to get you a new prescription."  
  
She nodded, "Thank you." and slipped off the table.   
  
Once they were in the car, Louise asked, "You want to take it now? We can get it filled in an hour."  
  
"Louise, you have no idea how much I love you right now."  
  
She laughed, "Oh, I think I do." Five minutes later they pulled into a parking lot, and went inside the store.   
  
Rory walked to the pharmacy counter and handed them the slip. The woman ripped a ticket in half and handed on half to Rory, "Your number is 2293. It will be ready in an hour."  
  
She nodded and walked over to Louise, "We've got an hour. What do you want to do?"  
  
The blonde looked around, "There's a toy display over there."  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
"I wonder if there are any huge balls..."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I've always wanted to put one in my shirt and pretend like I'm going into labor..."  
  
One hour later, after causing a scene by pretending Louise was going into labor, having a woman call the paramedics, and gathering a huge crown by laying on the ground and screaming that the baby wasn't coming out, and them having the ball 'accidentally' slip out from under her shirt, they'd walked away casually, simply saying 'That's odd' and had disappeared to avoid the very annoyed people.  
  
They were now walking back to the car and trying to avoid people's glares, laughing like idiots. Rory sat in the passenger seat, staring at the flat oval shaped container as Louise turned on the car, "What time are you going to take it?"   
  
"Around eight, I guess. What time is it?"  
  
Louise glanced at the dashboard, "Eight." Rory grabbed the water bottle out of the middle console and popped out the pill beside the space with 'Day 1" beside it. Louise looked over at her, "How do you feel?"  
  
She shrugged, "Normal. How long does it take to work?"   
  
"A month." Rory looked down at the package, nodding before turning on the music.  
  
NEXT MORNING, CHILTON  
  
Rory was at Paris's locker the next morning, discussing their history project, when Tristan came up behind them and leaned against the lockers behind Rory, not alerting her of his presence. Paris could see him, but gave no indication to Rory. They continued their conversation, "I still think that it would be better to do it on the Roman Empire."  
  
"Why is that so much better than ancient Egypt?"  
  
Paris shrugged, "The Romans had more class."  
  
"Oh, right, class alright-"  
  
"At least they didn't worship cats!"  
  
"Good one Paris." she said, joking around.  
  
"Besides, the Romans had young male gods." she said, glancing over Rory's shoulder before closing her locker and walking away.  
  
Rory opened her mouth, confused, and turned around, running into Tristan's chest. She stumbled backwards and he grabbed her, steadying her, "You alright?"  
  
She glared and slapped him in the chest playfully, "That was evil! Listening in on my conversation! I should kill you..." she trailed off, narrowing her eyes and looking him up and down.  
  
He laughed, "I'd let you kill me anytime." he whispered, leaning down. "As long as I got rewarded for it." and he captured her lips in a slow kiss, pulling her close. She smiled against his lips, patting his chest quickly before pushing him away gently.  
  
"I have to get to the library." He groaned. "Don't be such a baby!"  
  
"You don't have to go."  
  
"Yeah, I do. I have to wok on my project for 'Ancient Rome'. Unless of course you want to fall prey to Paris."  
  
"You're letting Paris win?" his eyebrow arched.  
  
"Is that so surprising?"  
  
"Yeah, actually. You're extremely pig headed most of the time."  
  
"Ah!" her jaw dropped in mock anger, "I'm leaving now."  
  
"Fine, leave me, I'll just go fine entertainment somewhere else!"  
  
She rolled her eyes, "Have fun with that."  
  
THAT NIGHT  
  
Rory and Blake wolfed down their food at their grandparents, the rest of the family staring at them. "I knew you two got your appetite from me, but even I'm not THAT bad." Lorelai said.  
  
Rory swallowed the chunk of food in her mouth, "You said we couldn't go out until we ate dinner."  
  
"So we're eating, just faster than normal." Blake finished for her as they went back to their food.  
  
"Oh for god's sake, you're going to kill yourselves. Just go." Emily said.  
  
The twins froze and looked up to their parents who shrugged and nodded. They sprang out of their chairs and ran to their grandmother. "Thanks grandma." they said in unison and kissed her on either cheek before sprinting out the door.   
  
Rory froze when they got outside, "Blake..."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"We have no car."  
  
"What?"  
  
"We're only fifteen."  
  
"Shit. We are, aren't we?"  
  
Rory laughed, "I'll be right back." she disappeared into the house and came out a few minutes later holding a set of keys.   
  
She dangled them in front of him and he snatched them away, "How did you get the keys to the Maxima?" he asked, dumbstruck.  
  
"Grandpa keeps all his keys on a key ring in the garage, all you have to do is look for the one you want and grab it. Grandpa won't miss it, and we'll return it later."  
  
"Do you have any idea how deep of shit we're going to be in?"  
  
She threw the keys at him, "Just drive."  
  
STARS HOLLOW  
  
Rory and Blake stood in the foyer, "What all do you have to do?" she asked.  
  
"Just change. You?"  
  
"Same, but we both know I'll take longer, so can you call Jess and Lane and tell them to get their asses over here?"  
  
"Will do." they went up to their rooms, and twenty minutes later, all four were in the car, Jess driving, and on their way to Tristan's.  
  
They pulled up at ten thirty and the party was in full swing. As soon as they cam inside, Blake and Lane were whisked away, leaving Jess to find Paris, who turned up a few minutes earlier, talking to Rory for a few minutes and confessing that she didn't know where Tristan was, before walking away with Jess in tow. She sighed, looking around. There were people dancing and making out, but no Tristan. She walked through the whole main floor, pushing her way through people, but never seeing Tristan.   
  
Finally, when she looked in the basement, she found him in the game room, playing pool with Baker. He was wearing baggy blue jeans and a long sleeve dark red shirt, and you could see the white collar of an undershirt. She came up behind him and wrapped one arm around his waist, whispering seductively into his ear, "Do I get to kill you now?"  
  
He grinned, turning around, "You know you could never kill me. I'm too pretty." he whispered, leaning down to capture her lips in a slow kiss. He rested his hands on her hips, pulling her closer. Her hands moved from his waist up to his chest and clenched at his shirt, deepening the kiss. Fire shot down her spine as his tongue swept against hers and his grip tightened on her hips possessively. He finally pulled away, needing air, "Hey."  
  
She grinned, "Hey."   
  
"Did you just get here?" he asked, keeping one arm around her, as her arms dropped from his neck to wrap around him from the side.  
  
Yeah. It was hilarious. We had to go to dinner at my grandparents, and grandma was afraid me and Blake were going to choke on our food we were beating so fast, and then told us to leave so we stole our grandpa's car."   
  
He looked down at her, grinning, "You're joking, right? About the car?"  
  
She unwrapped her arms, "Do I look like I'm joking?"   
  
He laughed, "You stole Richard's car?"  
  
"We're gonna give it back."  
  
"Mary..."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"You're crazy." she glared and poked him in the ribs. "Ouch." he grabbed his side, pretending to be hurt.  
  
"I hope that stings."  
  
"You should make it feel better."  
  
"Why would I want to make you feel better when I'm the one who caused the pain?"  
  
"Because you can't stand to see me suffer, I'm too amazing and beautiful and hilarious and-"   
  
She rolled her eyes, "Get over yourself, Dugrey."  
  
He grinned, "Never."  
  
Rory walked away, "I'm going to talk to normal people now."  
  
"Hey!" he called as she walked farther into the game room.   
  
Roy walked past pool tables and old arcade video games, looking around. She'd only been to Tristan's house once, mainly because his parents didn't like her. Lane and Henry were leaning against the wall and talking to Louise and Baker, all four laughing. She went over and they turned to her, "Hey." Louise smiled at her, Rory had asked her friend not to say anything to anyone about the birth control, she didn't want people to know, and it would be kind of weird if Tristan found out about it from someone else.  
  
"You aren't with Tristan? I thought you two made up." Baker said, looking around for her boyfriend.  
  
"We did, but I refuse to talk to him at the moment because-"  
  
"I'm so beautiful and amazing and she can't stand it." Tristan said, wrapping his arms around her from behind.  
  
"You do realize that you just called yourself beautiful, right?" she asked.  
  
"Yes, I know."  
  
"Women are described as beautiful, not guys."  
  
"Well I'm an individual."   
  
"You can say that again."  
  
"I'm an-" Rory covered his mouth, cutting him off, and she could feel him smirk under her palm.  
  
"I'm going to get a drink." she said, leaving the group.  
  
"She keeps walking all over the place...she's impossible." Tristan said before following her.  
  
"And yet he'll follow her no matter where she goes." Henry pointed out.  
  
Tristan caught up with her a few moments later, "Do you ever stay in one place?" he asked, wrapping one arm around her waist.  
  
"Occasionally. I depends on wither one place can entertain me for long enough."  
  
"So if you get bored you just leave?"  
  
"I'm not bored, just..." she trailed off and grinned, "socially incorrect."  
  
He laughed, "You don't seem very socially incorrect to me."  
  
"Don't lie." they fell into silence until Rory asked, "So, where are the drinks?"  
  
"See, I just said I'd have the party here. I didn't actually do anything for it. I don't even control the music. People brought drinks, but I wouldn't trust them. Come on, you can have something in the kitchen." he led her through a swinging door and into a very luxurious kitchen, all the cabinets were made out of dark cherry, it reminded her of all the stereotypes of mansions. There were also a few couples in the room, although you couldn't see their faces because they were 'occupied' at the moment. They hadn't even noticed the door opening and two more people walking in. Tristan opened the fridge and Rory saw an assortment of drinks, she just grabbed a wine cooler and he took a beer. He smirked, "Well, I must say I'm surprised."  
  
Rory pulled the bottle away from her mouth, "Why?"  
  
"I didn't know you drank."  
  
"Only on the rare occasion." she smiled, "You seem to bring out the worst in me."  
  
He grinned, whispering as he leaned down, "Bad Mary? I think it's one of my better accomplishments." and he caught her lips in his. He slowly deepened the kiss, backing her into the counter. She leaned back over the counter without breaking the kiss and wrapped her arms around his neck. He rested his hands on the counter top, trapping her.   
  
Her warm tongue moving against his was the sweetest torture he'd ever felt, and her small hands sliding from his neck to rest on his arms, rubbing them lightly, it was the most innocent relationship he'd ever been in, but god, what he'd do to her if given her permission. He didn't even want to think about it, not at the moment. That's what made it such torture, he had to work for everything he got from her, and she wasn't going to just do something if she didn't want to the way so many other girls would. But that's also what made it interesting, and fun. With other girls he got bored, they'd give up in a banter. They'd fuck a guy after one day. They acted helpless and kissed a guy's ass to make them like her. That's not that way Rory was. She'd never give up a fight if her life depended on it. She'd never have sex until she wanted to, no matter what the guy felt. He couldn't picture her being the damsel in distress. Hell, she'd be the dragon holding the princess hostage.   
  
She moved her hands from his arms to his chest. Damn, she was constantly moving, wasn't she? Her hands explored his chest through his shirt, her fingers raking along it. He groaned into her mouth, his hands moving to her hips. She smiled against his lips and raked her fingernails over it again. His grip tightened, so this was the bad side to Rory? He definitely liked it. Her hands slipped lower, and he kept repeating to himself, 'if she feels it she'll freak out, if she feels it she'll freak out.' That was the only thing stopping him from getting a boner. Her fingers slipped under his shirt, moving over his defined abdomen and chiseled muscles. But how in god's good name had she ever learned to do that? She'd been with Dean for crying out loud, and he knew for a fact this type of situation had never happened with the ex boyfriend. He deepened the kiss, if that was possible, kissing her harder. Suddenly, the pressure of her fingers decreased and they were barley skimming him, making the muscles jump at her slight touch.   
  
He didn't want to scare her, but couldn't stand not touching her at all in the way she was to him. One of his hands kept a firm, possessive hold on her hip, while the other moved up the back of her shirt slowly, not wanting to have the same reaction Dean had gotten, although he knew he wouldn't. Strangely enough, this was the first time they'd ever done anything like this. He'd never wanted to scare her, but suddenly, he didn't think he would. In that moment all he wanted was to be alone with her. With a bed. Not necessarily having sex, but he wanted it to just be her, no one else. God, what he'd do to her if they were alone. His hand slid further up her shirt and to the front. He cupped her breast, through the bra, and she felt an aching, wanting the material separating his hand from her gone. Suddenly she pulled away, pushing him back.  
  
He snatched his hand away, obviously regretfully. "I'm sorry Rory," he whispered, thinking she was about to run away, "I didn't mean to push-"   
  
She put her finger over his lips, silencing him, "It's not that." she whispered, and he looked relieved, kissing her fingertips lightly, "There are too many people here." she was breathless, looking him over with clouded eyes.  
  
He looked down at her and their eyes met, making a silent promise. Later. Everything would happen, but later. Rory grabbed her drink as Tristan leaned down, kissing her gently before grabbing her hand and leading her out of the kitchen.  
  
They were on their way back to the game room when a familiar brunette passed by them. Summer stopped, "Oh, Rory, Tristan, it's so nice to see you!" she gushed, disgustingly fake. She got on her tip toes to kiss Tristan on the cheek, but he put his right hand squarely on her shoulder, pushing her away, while his left arm remained around Rory's waist protectively. Dean, who was attached to Summer's side, pulled her back, obviously unhappy with that little show. Summer looked between the two boys, grinning. She wanted to make Rory and Dean jealous, and tempt Tristan. Unfortunately for her, only one of those things was happening. She shrugged, "Happy birthday, Tristan." came out in a seductive purr.  
  
"My birthday was week ago." he said, taking Rory's right hand in his own and playing with it, ignoring Summer after that, but keeping his left arm draped around Rory's hips.  
  
"So, you're sixteen..." she trailed off, and he didn't answer. Rory grinned, looking at him playing with her hand. His gaze raised and their eyes met, but he looked back down after smiling faintly, and resumed playing with her fingers. "Nice party." he ignored her. "Remember what happened at the first party of our Freshman year, when we were dating?" Tristan froze, looking back up at Rory, who turned to Summer.   
  
Tristan pulled her closer and wrapped both his arms around her, resting his chin on her shoulder, "Yeah. I remember."  
  
"Good times, huh?"  
  
"Summer, what are you playing at?"  
  
"Nothing. Just reminiscing about our fun."  
  
"You say as your boyfriend stands beside you and I'm with my girlfriend."  
  
"Dean knows I do the same thing with him. And as for Rory," she paused, looking at Rory with cruel eyes, "Have you added the Magdalene to her Mary yet?" she asked.  
  
Tristan's eyes darkened dangerously, "Summer, just because you feel the need to fuck every guy after you've been in a relationship with them for a week, that doesn't mean everyone does." he bit out, tightening his grip on Rory and rubbing slow, comforting circles in her thigh, the same way he did when introducing her to her to his parents. It was kind of the way he assured her that everything was alright, it was intimate, no one ever noticed, and it was the special thing between them.  
  
She rolled her eyes, "You mad because you've had to be sweet and gentle for so long, baby? Tired of keeping it in your pants for the little Mary?"  
  
Tristan rolled his eyes, "Go suck bagboy's dick, Summer. And stay out of my life."   
  
She bit her lip and arched her eyebrows suggestively before walking away. Tristan slowly turned the unmoving Rory around to face him. She looked up at him nervously, biting her lip. Not in a seductive way Summer always did, but in the nervous way that he loved. She started to turn to walk away, but he grabbed her arm, pulling her back to him, wrapping one arm around her, not letting her move away, and touching her face lightly with the other, "Don't walk away from me again, baby." he whispered, his face inches from hers, "Not because of Summer." he closed the space between their lips and kissed her gently, not using his tongue.   
  
She clenched the front of his shirt, holding on so hard her fingers began to ache. She felt a burning in her stomach that spread throughout her entire body like wildfire. Summer's words rang through her head *have you added the Magdalene to her Mary yet?* that just made it all feel so degrading, like if she ever did do anything with Tristan, he would think it was only to prove Summer wrong. *Tired of keeping it in your pants for the little Mary?* but then she wanted to prove Summer wrong, she wasn't a prude, was she? Had Tristan expected her to do more by now? He knew she was a virgin, and didn't seem to mind, but you never know. The image of Summer and Tristan together burned at her mind and she felt tears trickle down her face slowly. She didn't want to cry, not again, but she couldn't help it.  
  
Tristan pulled away when he tasted salty tears on her lips. He looked over every inch of her face, tracing her cheek gently. "Do you have any idea how much I hate you sometimes?" she whispered, staring into his eyes.  
  
"Almost as much as you love me all the time." he said back softly, pulling her closer to him.  
  
She looked down, "God, I feel so stupid."  
  
"Why?" he put two fingers under her chin and lifted it up so that she was looking at him.  
  
She shook her head, "I keep crying, and I never used to cry. But with this whole thing I just.....keep crying."  
  
"Mary, Summer messes with people's heads. It's what she does best. Just don't let her get to you."  
  
"That's what everyone tells me, but I can't help it."  
  
"Even though you know what's happened, she still gets to you?"  
  
"Yes, I mean, I know that you had sex with her, but I keep picturing it when she says things like that-"  
  
"Rory," he cut her off, "You don't have to worry. She is part of my past, I don't even think about Summer. She is absolutely NOTHING to me. After I broke up with her she became a slut, and that's it. You never have to worry about me ever doing anything with anyone else."  
  
"Do we seem to be having the same conversation constantly?"  
  
He grinned, "We won't once you get it through your thick head that you'll never have to worry."  
  
She shook her head, looking down. Tristan wrapped his arms around her waist and began moving slowly, "Did you realize that we're in the middle of the dance floor?" he whispered into her ear.   
  
Rory looked around, grinning, "No." she rested her head on his shoulder, "Tristan..." she said after a few minutes.  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
She looked up at him, "What's going to happen after we have sex?"  
  
"What?" he looked at her, surprised.  
  
"I mean, we both know it's going to happen, but.....after, are we just going to break up, or what?"  
  
"Why would we break up?"  
  
"I don't know, stuff happens."  
  
"Rory, you know I don't care when it happens, right? I don't want to do anything until you're sure that you're ready." he whispered.  
  
"I know, it's just, I know that you want to, and I want you to have it."  
  
"Don't throw your virginity away. I don't want you to regret it."  
  
"You think I'd blame you?" she asked.  
  
"I know you would."  
  
"Tristan-"  
  
"Rory, your first time will hurt, you know that. It will hurt really bad. I'm not going to lie, I do want to be your first, but not sooner than you're ready."  
  
She looked down, "I will be."  
  
He kissed her temple lightly, "I know." he held her closer, listening to the music.  
  
----  
  
I think about your face  
  
And how I fall into your eyes  
  
The outline that I trace  
  
Around the one that I call mine  
  
Time that called for space  
  
Unclear where you drew the line  
  
I don't need to solve this case   
  
And I don't need to look behind  
  
Close my eyes  
  
Let the whole thing pass me by  
  
There is no time  
  
To waste, asking why  
  
I'll run away with you, by my side  
  
I'll run away with you, by my side  
  
I need to let go  
  
Let go  
  
Let go  
  
Let go of this pride   
  
Do I expect to change   
  
The past I hold inside  
  
With all the words I say  
  
Repeating over in my mind  
  
Some things you can't erase,   
  
No matter how hard you try  
  
An exit to escape   
  
Is all that there is left to find  
  
Close my eyes  
  
Let the whole thing pass me by  
  
There is no time  
  
To waste, asking why  
  
I'll run away with you, by my side  
  
I'll run away with you, by my side  
  
I need to let go  
  
Let go  
  
Let go  
  
Let go of this pride   
  
Until this echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo in my mind  
  
Until this echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo can subside  
  
So I close my eyes  
  
Let the whole thing pass me by  
  
There is no time   
  
To waste, asking why  
  
I'll run away with you, by my side  
  
I'll run away with you, by my side  
  
I need to let go  
  
Let go  
  
Let go  
  
Let go of this pride  
  
Until this echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo in my mind  
  
Until this echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo  
  
Echo can subside 


	11. Break Myself

A/N: I don't own 'Break Myself' by Something Corporate  
  
I'm willing to break myself   
  
To shake this hell from everything I touch  
  
I'm willing to bleed for days  
  
My reds and grays  
  
So you don't hurt so much  
  
Rory sat against the wall outside Chilton, watching the people pass by. A few stopped to greet her, but most walked past her in silence. Madeline sat beside her, and they stayed in a comfortable silence for a few minutes until she asked, "What's wrong?"  
  
Rory shook her head, "I'm fine."  
  
Madeline nodded, not pushing the subject and she looked forward at the people as well. "So, what are you and Tristan doing this weekend?"  
  
"I'm not sure. We'll probably wind up going to David's party tomorrow and getting bored, so we'll go to his house."  
  
"Not yours?"  
  
She shook her head, "Small town. They're still not quite prepared to accept Tristan after I chose him over Dean."  
  
Madeline nodded, "Ah, I see."  
  
"Yes. So, what about you and Blake?"  
  
"Same, but we'll probably go to my house."  
  
"Fun."  
  
She grinned, "Most likely."  
  
"Eww." Rory laughed and pushed Madeline's shoulder lightly.  
  
She laughed, "Okay, well I have to go, but I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
"Bye."  
  
STARSHOLLOW  
  
Rory walked down the sidewalk, not paying attention to where she was going. Talking to Tristan seemed to do that to her a lot, and she was currently talking to him on her cell phone.   
  
"So we'll go to David's party tomorrow, and if we get bored we'll just leave?"  
  
"Of course. We'll come to my house, I'll show you the bed, demonstrate how to remove your shirt-"  
  
"And we'll have one of those wonderful conversations about school, won't we?"  
  
"Of course. That's what I was going to say next." he was obviously smiling.  
  
"Of course. I'm sure it was."  
  
"It was. Really."  
  
"Uh-huh. I believe- oh shit." as a result of not paying attention, she ran head long into someone, dropping her purse and it's contents spilled out.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"Nothing. I've gotta go. I'll talk to you later."  
  
"Bye baby."  
  
She smiled, it always gave her chills whenever he called her that, "Bye." she hung up and got to her knees, picking up the things from her purse, "Sorry, I wasn't-" she froze, the birth control package had fallen out, and an all too familiar hand was holding it right in from of her. She looked up to see Dean's infuriated face. "Sorry, I didn't see you-"  
  
"Whatever."  
  
"Are you alright?" she asked, unsure of how hard she'd hit him.  
  
"I'm fine. But I have to wonder what you're thinking."  
  
"Nothing-"  
  
"Rory, you-" he looked around, lowering his voice, "You're having sex with him?! What the hell are you thinking?"  
  
"I'm not-"  
  
He cut her off, "After all the sluts he's been with? He could have anything! You have no idea whether he's used protection or who he's gotten pregnant, or-"  
  
"Oh, so you're dating a slut?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Summer. He had sex with Summer." Dean had nothing to say to that, "Besides, he's always used protection, and he's never gotten anyone pregnant, and he definitely doesn't have anything!"  
  
"Rory, " he said pleadingly, as if trying to talk some sense into her, "We were together for almost four months. You never said that you loved me. You never even considered having sex with me, but you've only been with him for a few months, and you've already claimed that you're in love with him, and you're sleeping with him! You have no idea how much you're about to screw up your life!" he said, waving his hands around in the air.  
  
She shook her head in disbelief. He had no right to say that, "Why does it even matter to you? I thought I was just another slut in line!" she yelled.  
  
"You know I didn't mean that!"  
  
"No, actually, I don't."  
  
"Well I didn't."  
  
"That's great, I really don't care." she snatched the pills away from him, "And why do you care so much anyway? You're having sex with Summer."  
  
"That's different."  
  
"How so?"  
  
"You were planning on waiting until you were really in love, Rory."  
  
"What makes you think I didn't follow that plan?"  
  
It took him a moment to realize what she meant, but when he did, he shook his head, "Oh no. Oh hell no. Rory, you are not sure enough that you love him to throw away your virginity like you did."  
  
"How would you know?"  
  
"Because I know you. And you don't love people like him."  
  
"Right whatever Dean, I'm sorry that you're slightly delusional, but you don't know me. You never did, and you never will." she turned on her heel and began to walk away, but turned back to face him, "And not that it's any of your business, but I haven't slept with Tristan...yet." she added the last part just to spite him, only because he was hurting her so much.  
  
"Don't fucking lie to me, Rory. You have birth control pills in your purse. You're not just on it for no reason." he whispered harshly.  
  
She rolled her eyes, "Whatever, Dean. It's not my problem if you don't believe me." she turned and started to walk away.  
  
He groaned, running to catch up with her, "Rory, look, just think about it, okay?"  
  
"Dean, I'm not having this conversation with you, alright?"  
  
"Rory-"  
  
She turned on her heel, "What?!"  
  
He shook his head, defeated, "Just don't let him force you into anything."  
  
She shook her head with barely suppressed anger, "Don't pretend like you know him, Dean. Don't try to seem like you know anything he'd do. Because if you knew anything about Tristan then you'd know that he would never force me into anything." she turned and walked away, her feet stomping unintentionally.   
  
SATURDAY AFTERNOON  
  
Tristan knocked on Rory's door, surprised to see Lorelai open it. "Hey Lorelai."  
  
"Hi." she didn't move to let him in, so he stood on the doorstep in silence. He looked at his feet nervously before looking back up at her as she spoke, "You know, I do want to like you."   
  
"I....want you to like me too." he said uncertainly.  
  
"I want to like you because Rory likes you. Blake and Jess like you, so that makes me think that just maybe you might be good enough for her," she stared him in the eyes, "But don't think for one second that I trust you."  
  
"I don't understand what you mean."  
  
"Rory's going to Harvard." Lorelai said, changing the subject.  
  
He nodded, "I know."  
  
"Never take Harvard away from her."  
  
"I won't."  
  
"Not intentionally, at least." she mumbled.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You won't intentionally take it away from her, but you might on accident. Rory plans on being a virgin until her wedding night. Or if not that long then at least until she's graduated high school and is well into college and madly in love with someone who loves her back."  
  
"I do love her." he said quickly.  
  
Lorelai shook her head sadly, "Oh, Tristan, you have NO idea how wrong of an answer that was."  
  
"I'm sorry if that isn't the answer you want, but it stands." he said, looking her back in the eye.  
  
"Don't try to have a staring contest with me, Dugrey. I want to be the cool mom, I really do. But if my daughter is on the line then I can't be."  
  
"I promise you, Rory's in no danger. She's not on the line of anything."  
  
"Rory doesn't need a guy to do anything for her. She can live without one."  
  
"I know. But I'm still not going anywhere."  
  
"As I can see that we're getting nowhere, just know that if you ever even TRY to force her into anything-"  
  
He cut her off, "I wouldn't."  
  
Lorelai shook her head, "Like I said, I don't trust you." she opened the door wider, allowing him in, "She's in her room. Don't you dare shut the door. We have eyes all over this house." she turned and walked away, leaving Tristan speechless. He looked after her, but shook his head, making his way up the stairs.  
  
He knocked on Rory's closed door, "Who is it?" he heard her ask over the 'Blondie' CD that was playing.  
  
"Your love slave-slash- sex god, here to serve and please-"  
  
"Shut up and come in." he could hear her laughing. He pushed open the door and was surprised to see her walking around the room without a shirt. She looked over at him, "Hey. Hang on just a second." she walked into the closet and walked back out, this time with a shirt on. She smiled, walking over to him and kissed him lightly, "Hey."  
  
"Hey." he said, obviously distracted.  
  
She looked him up and down, "What's wrong?"  
  
He shook his head, "Just thinking."  
  
"About what?"  
  
He shrugged, "Nothing. Everything." a grin slowly made it's way onto his lips, "You. And that shirt that I would just love to-"  
  
"Ready to go?" she grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room.  
  
"Take all my fun like that."  
  
She laughed, "Drive me in your pretty car."  
  
"No. I was planning on making you walk."  
  
"Ouch." she turned to face him, "That hurts right here." she patted the left side of her chest.  
  
"Right there?" he asked, tracing over the area with his fingertips lightly and leaning in.  
  
She nodded, "Right there." she leaned up, their lips meeting gently, and Tristan began to deepen it, but Rory pulled back slightly, nodding her head to the side and finishing going down the stairs. When they go to the bottom, Tristan saw that Lorelai was standing there. She looked at them suspiciously before nodding and walking away.  
  
"She lurks?" Tristan whispered into Rory's ear, resting his hand on her hip.  
  
She laughed, "Occasionally."  
  
PARIS'S   
  
Rory sat back on one of the couches, after getting her drink, between Jess and Madeline, Tristan was leaning with his back against the couch, directly below her. They were in the basement theater, watching 'How To Deal' which was, according to Blake and Tristan, 'the chick flick of the century'. But they agreed to watch it anyway. It was seven, and the girls were going to start getting ready for the party in half an hour. The guys probably wouldn't even start until about fifteen minutes before they left.   
  
She stood up, bored, and walked outside. Tristan followed her, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind. She smiled, leaning back on him. It was weird, they rarely said 'I love you'. Even though they'd said it before, it wasn't like they said it everyday. That way, whenever one would say it, it was special, not just something from everyday conversation. He trailed kisses over her neck lightly, not having been able to kiss her properly this afternoon because of Lorelai. He rotated so that she was pushed against the wall of the house, and he had easier access to her.   
  
Rory wrapped her arms around Tristan's neck, pulling him closer as his hand trailed down her body before slipping under her shirt and making it's way slowly north. She tensed, her hand moving to rest on Tristan's arm that was still on her hip. But before he was able to make contact and break the tension, the back door opened and his hand shot back to her hip, knowing how she wasn't exactly fond of public displays of affection.   
  
"Rory, we should start getting ready." Louise said, a knowing grin on her face.  
  
The brunette pulled away from her boyfriend and nodded, "I'll be there in a second."  
  
"Okay." she went back inside.  
  
Rory moved to follow her, but Tristan held her arm, "Stay for a minute." he whispered, pulling her closer. She grinned, letting him bring her to himself, and surrendered to the kiss she knew was coming. They hadn't been able to talk much the last week, and she missed him way too much. She pulled away after a moment and walked inside, leaving him alone.  
  
PARTY  
  
Rory sighed, taking a drink of her hard lemonade, she wasn't really a drinker. Tristan had just gone to see if Blake and Madeline were still here. He'd left about ten minutes ago and had failed to return, and she was becoming extremely bored. She leaned against the wall behind her, but jumped up upon hearing someone yell, 'FIGHT!'. Rolling her eyes was the best she could do. She'd seen enough fights from growing up with Jess and Blake.  
  
Two people walked by her, and she couldn't help hearing their conversation. "Who started it?"  
  
"Nathan and Cole. The idiots."  
  
"I knew they'd never gotten over having their egos bruised at the beginning of the year."  
  
"Yeah, but this time it's the two of them, and Patrick Hackner."  
  
"Why is he in it?"  
  
"Sticking up for his friends, I guess."  
  
"What did they do to start it?"  
  
"Same thing as at the beginning of the year, except this time they made sure that they were in hearing distance of Tristan and Blake, and Jess is in it now, too." they moved away from her, towards the balcony, and Rory froze.  
  
Nathan and Cole...finishing a fight from the beginning of the year...Jess, Tristan, and Blake...oh god, they were fighting for the same reason, that meant those three had been talking about her in hearing distance of her boyfriend, brother, and best friend. She pushed her way through the crowd until she got to where Madeline and Paris were standing. Henry and Baker were ten feet away from them, ready to jump in if they were needed. Rory guessed that Tristan had thrown the first punch, and then Blake and Jess had started in right after him.   
  
Paris looked over at her, "Hey." she said, over the sound of the music and the cheering of the crowd.  
  
"What happened?" she asked, not taking her eyes off the boys in the center of the circle.  
  
"Tristan came to see if any of us had left yet, and we were all talking for a second, but then we heard Cole, Nathan, and Patrick talking about you and Madeline."  
  
"Why would they do that?" she asked, not sure of the answer.  
  
"Simple. Nathan likes you, and hates Tristan. Cole is still embarrassed that when he jumped in the fight on your first day, he got his ass kicked, and Patrick hates Blake for taking Madeline away from him." she explained as Tristan hit Nathan in the jaw and a ringing crack echoed through the room. That slowed him down, but not for long.   
  
"And they did it just to spite the three of them?"  
  
"Obviously."  
  
"So how long has this been going on?" Jess moved out of the way of a punch thrown by Cole, and returned the favor with a punch in the face, sending the other boy reeling.  
  
"About five minutes, but I think it's almost over." she said, as a handful of Seniors and large Juniors pushed their way to middle. They'd clearly decided that the fight had gone on for long enough when Blake punched Patrick in the nose, and it looked as if he'd broken it.  
  
The seniors grabbed Tristan and Jess, holding their hands behind their back and the Juniors grabbed the other boys, while it took two to contain Blake. David was one of the Juniors holding Blake. When the twin had calmed down, David released him, but the other boy, Evan, kept a hold on him. The host stood in front of the other three boys, who were now released, "Get out."  
  
"What?" Nathan yelled, "Tristan threw the first punch!"  
  
"You were talking about his girlfriend, dumbass! Get out!"  
  
"Jess pushed me before I did anything." Cole told him.  
  
"You were talking about Rory. You deserved it. And you're just pissed that you got your ass beat AGAIN."  
  
"Blake punched me before I hit him!" Patrick argued.  
  
"You were talking about hit girl AND his sister. YOU have nothing to say that will make me let you stay." Nathan opened his mouth to protest again, but David cut him off, "Either get out, or I'll have you escorted out by the wrestling team."  
  
Patrick rolled his eyes, "Let's just go, guys. This isn't over." he pulled out of his restrainer's grip and pushed his way through the crowd, when he passed Blake, he stood two inches from him, getting in the boy's space, trying to intimidate him, which didn't work, because Blake returned that withering gaze. Patrick shouldered past Blake, and looked at Madeline in a not so innocent way before making his way out.  
  
Nathan stopped in front of Tristan, "This isn't over." he hissed, standing there for a moment, he looked over at Rory, their eyes met and smirked, Rory's blue orbs darkening, before turning back to the girl's boyfriend, waiting for Tristan's reaction. He looked over at his girlfriend, and she met his gaze as well, Tristan looked back to Nathan and just smirked in a way that said all too clearly that this most definitely was over. He'd won. Nathan shook his head, an unsettling smirk still on his face as he shouldered past Tristan, eyes locked with Rory and walked through the crowd, pausing beside her. He looked down at her, and his hand brushed her neck gently and he whispered, "Just wait." into her ear before looking back at Tristan, whose eyes had turned a dangerous shade of gray, Nathan had a smug smirk and made his way out.  
  
Cole just shook his head, a sneer on his face as he pushed past Jess. Blake walked over to Madeline, wrapping one arm around her waist, and they disappeared from view. Jess went to Paris and kissed her forehead before taking her hand and walking away. Tristan made his way to Rory, facing her, his hands resting on her hips gently, but at the same time all too possessively. They just stood there, eyes locked, until the crowd evened out and they were no longer the center of attention. She sighed, shaking her head. He touched her face gently, and leaned down, brushing his lips against hers. "Let's go back to my house." he sounded kind of sad, his eyes had turned a gray color, which she'd learned meant that he was upset about something.   
  
Her eyebrows drew together, "Okay." she said softly before setting her drink on the table and following him out, they'd taken four cars, someone would figure out that they'd left. He opened the door to his car for her and she smiled, getting in. He went to the drivers side and got in as well. Tristan's house was less than five minutes away, so the ride was uneventful, but Rory revealed that she wanted to go swimming when they got to his house. He laughed, but when they got there, she went straight to his room and grabbed the suit she'd left two weeks ago. He sat on the bed and waited or her to come out of the bathroom. She emerged, wearing the bikini.  
  
"You're serious?"  
  
Rory grinned, "You thought I was kidding?"   
  
"I kinda did..."  
  
She shook her head, "I never kid."  
  
30 MINUTES LATER  
  
Tristan sat in the hot tub with Rory in his lap. She'd gotten cold...go figure...and had wanted to move from the pool to the hot tub. His arms were wrapped around her and she was resting her head on his chest. She looked up at him, "This is really comfortable." she whispered.  
  
He nodded, kissing the top of her head, "Yeah, it is." he said quietly, running his hand up and down her side gently.  
  
Rory sighed deeply and rested her head on his shoulder, "My birthday is in two weeks." she said, as if to herself.  
  
"I know."  
  
Her head shot off his shoulder, "How?"  
  
"Blake."  
  
"He told you?" he nodded, "When?"  
  
"A few days ago."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Really, really."   
  
Rory laid her head back on his shoulder, but noticed him looking into space, as if he'd forgotten about her being there. She looked up at him, "What's wrong?"  
  
"Why do you think something's wrong?"  
  
"You're really quiet." she whispered, looking from is eyes to his lips.  
  
"Am I?"  
  
She nodded, "You look sad."  
  
He shook his head, "I'm just thinking."  
  
"About?"  
  
He bit his lip, looking out over the back yard, as if debating with himself weather he should tell her or not. Finally, he looked back at her, "It's just that, everything I've ever touched has turned to hell. No relationship has ever ended well."  
  
"And you're worried?" she asked, looking into his eyes and realizing how dark they seemed.  
  
"A little. Yeah."  
  
She leaned in closer, "I don't think you have to worry about that."  
  
"No?"  
  
She shook her head, kissing him softly. He returned the gesture, applying a slight pressure on her lips. She pulled away, "Tristan?"  
  
"Hmm?" he looked at her, running his fingertips over the top of her arm lightly.  
  
She breathed in deeply, "I think I should tell you something."  
  
"You think?"  
  
"I think."  
  
"Okay..." he trailed off, unsure of what to say.  
  
Rory shifted so she could face him better, straddling him with one leg on either side of him. He turned his head slightly, wondering what this was all about, "Okay," she paused, took a breath, and continued now that she was situated, "Three weeks ago I spent the night at Louise's house." Tristan nodded, showing that he remembered and inviting her to continue. "We started talking and then we went to one of the doctors in Hartford that works at a teen clinic." he opened his mouth slightly, as if to say something, but closed it. "I got a prescription for birth control, and in ten days, it will have been a month since I first took it." she stopped, finished.   
  
Tristan's face was unreadable, and then he looked slightly confused. "You're on birth control?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"And in ten days, you can't get pregnant..." he said slowly.  
  
"Yes." she nodded.  
  
"So what you're saying is..." he trailed off, not wanting to seem as if he was pushing it.  
  
"In eleven days, if I'm not a virgin anymore, there is no chance that I will be pregnant."  
  
"I got that part." he nodded.  
  
She rolled her eyes, "You want me to spell it out?!"  
  
He grinned, kissing her nose, "Nope, I got it."  
  
She shook her head, "You're impossible."  
  
"And you're so hot when you're mad." She narrowed her eyes playfully, pursing her lips as she leaned down to kiss him slowly. He grinned against her lips, deepening the kiss. His hands moved down her body slowly, pulling her closer. She wrapped her arms around his neck, grinding into him slowly. He tightened his grip on her hips as if to still them, not here. She couldn't be doing this now, not in the hot tub in his backyard where he couldn't do anything to her. She bit his bottom lip gently, her hands trailing down his chest. But she was the one who gasped as she realized exactly the effect she was having on him, as the proof became known below her.   
  
She broke away and looked up at him to see that he was looking straight at her. A blush made it's way onto her cheeks and she tried to look away, but Tristan put two fingers under her chin, pushing it up so she faced him. "Don't look away." he whispered, "It's nothing to be nervous about."   
  
"Not for you." she said quietly, looking up at him through thick lashes.  
  
"Or you either." he replied.  
  
She sighed, looking down at her hands. He laced his fingers with hers and she looked up, "Mary?" he kissed her gently.  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"Why did you tell me about the birth control?" he gave her another short kiss..  
  
"Because."   
  
"Because why?" he leaned in to kiss her again, but she held him a few inches away.  
  
"Why are you asking me this?" she asked, shaking her head.  
  
"Because, Rory," he touched her face gently, "The way you're talking, I'm guessing that, in a few weeks, you want us to have sex." he came right out and said it.  
  
She blushed crimson and moved off of him, "Well, if you don't want-"  
  
He cut her off, "And I want that too. You have no idea how much I want it, Ror."  
  
"But..." she started for him, trailing off.  
  
"If you want to have sex, then it's going to hurt. A lot, your first time."  
  
"I know."  
  
He looked her in the eyes, whispering, "And I don't want to hurt you."  
  
Rory inhaled sharply, swallowing the lump in her throat, eyes wide. "I-it wouldn't be your fault." she was obviously surprised.  
  
"But it would happen. Rory I've never been a girl's first, and I'm not going to lie to you, I do want to be your first. But I've never had to be gentle, I've never been with someone that I might hurt. And knowing that there's no way around it, I feel completely helpless. Because it's a known fact, it's going to hurt like hell, and your first time there will be no pleasure. I know a lot of people and stories glorify your first time and make it seem like this amazing, satisfying experience-but it won't be. And even though I do want it, I don't want to make myself hurt you."  
  
She looked down, unsure of what to say after his little speech, and she simply replied in a whisper, "I trust you."  
  
"But I'm not so sure I trust myself with you." he said softly.  
  
"Look Tristan, you're obviously bringing up every point of why you don't want this to happen, so I'll just save you the trouble of going through something so horrible as having to ever have sex with me and just leave right now, so we can forget this whole thing ever happened." she moved to get out, but he held her arm gently.  
  
"You can't be serious."  
  
She looked back at him, "Then what the hell are you saying this for?"  
  
"I want you to know what you're getting yourself into, Rory. If you think I'm trying to back out of this relationship then you're incredibly mistaken." he put his hands gently on either side of her face, "I love you Rory, okay? I am so fucking in love with you that it scares me. We've only been together for a few months, but I can see myself with you for the rest of my life. And that scares the shit out of me. I've never been in love. I'm only sixteen, so I have a lot of years to go before I'm ready for marriage, but I can see myself with you until then. And I've never had to worry about not hurting a girl before, but god damn it Rory, I'm scared as hell right now. And I will do anything I have to so that you won't hurt. I'd do anything to make it painless, but I can't. I'm willing to go through hell so you don't have to! I would break every bone in my body if it would mean that you'd never hurt." this had turned from him telling her why he was acting the way he was to a proclamation of his love. "I am so fucking in love that I would rather break myself than have this turn to hell like everything I've ever touched has! It doesn't scare me to hurt, but it does scares me that I might hurt you. You are the only one that I'm willing to change for, Rory! The only one." he finished, his eyes dark.  
  
Rory's eyes were filled with tears and she held his wrists gently, her eyes closed as she kissed his palm, and then opened again, "Why would you do that for me?" she whispered.  
  
"I told you." his soft voice breaking, "I love you."  
  
She closed her eyes, a single tear rolling down her cheek and she whispered, "I know."   
  
"Come here." he whispered. She crawled back onto his lap, letting him wrap his arms around her, holding her to his chest tightly as he kissed the top of her head. She turned her face up, and his lips descended to hers, quickly covering them. She breathed in through her nose as he touched her face gently, keeping one arm around her. His tongue slowly made it's way into her mouth, and it was so gradual, that she was surprised to realize that it was there. But she responded to the kiss slowly. It was evident that he didn't want the kiss rushed, he was trying to be gentle, because he knew that soon, treating her like glass would become vital to keeping her his.   
  
Never again-will we fire this gun-no  
  
Never again-you're the only one  
  
Never again-but you're already gone  
  
I'm willing to break myself-I'm not afraid  
  
I'm willing to break myself-I'm not afraid  
  
I'm willing to brake myself-I'm not afraid  
  
I'm willing to break myself   
  
To shake this hell from everything I touch  
  
I'm willing to bleed for days-my reds and grays   
  
So you don't hurt so much  
  
So much  
  



	12. Fall To Pieces

A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or the song. It's 'Fall To Pieces' by Avril Lavigne.  
  
**_You're the only one _**

**_I'd be with 'till the end _**

**_When I come undone _**

**_You bring me back again _**

**_Back under the stars _**

**_Back into your arms _**

**_I don't want to fall to pieces _**

**_I just want to sit and stare at you _**

**_I don't want to talk about it _**

**_I_****_ don't want a conversation _**

**_I just want to cry in front of you _**

**_I don't want to talk about it 'cause _**

**_I'm in love with you_**  
  
"So, Friday is the party we're throwing for you, Saturday is the one at your grandparent's, and Sunday is the one your parents are throwing in Stars Hollow." Louise said, looking at a pad of paper in her lap.  
  
"Which you are all invited to." Rory said from across the lunchroom table.  
  
"Can everybody come?" Blake asked, looking at all of them.  
  
Louise nodded, "Of course."  
  
"Wouldn't miss it." Madeline said, looking up at Blake.  
  
"Yeah." Baker and Henry said at the same time.  
  
Tristan kissed Rory's temple gently, "I'll be there."  
  
"I'll already be in Stars Hollow all day on Sunday." Paris said.  
  
Rory looked up, "You will?"  
  
"Jess." was all she had to say. There was a round of nods of understanding.  
  
"He's in charge of music, right?" Baker asked.  
  
Madeline grinned, "Yup. We're gonna give somebody a heart attack."  
  
FRIDAY  
  
Rory turned in front of her full length mirror, looking at her outfit from every angle. She was wearing a jean miniskirt and combat boots, along with purple fishnets and a black top. On the front it said: I (heart) NY Boys, and it had purple mesh ribbon lacing up in the back. She glanced at her make up. She had on more than usual. Black eyeliner, purple eyeshadow and the mascara was labeled black/purple, and it showed as a dark purple when the light hit it. Her hair was in two low braids, over the front of her shoulders and she had two thin strips pulled out of the rest, hanging on either side of her face.  
  
There was a knock on her door. She opened it and smiled to see Lane. Her friend grinned, "Happy early birthday." she said, hugging Rory.  
  
The brunette smiled, "Thanks. You ready?" she asked, looking over her friend's outfit. Lane's mid-torso length hair was let loose, and she had on a short red and black plaid miniskirt with a black shirt that said 'Beat It' and had a stick figure playing the drums, along with black platform shoes that had a star cut out of it that you could see straight through. Blake and Jess had so affectionately named them 'The Hulk Shoes' last summer.  
  
Lane nodded, "Ready."  
  
Rory laced their arms, "So then let's go."  
  
LOUISE'S  
  
The four friends walked in and a few people turned, calling 'Happy Birthday!' to Blake and Rory. They nodded, thanking them.  
  
"Late to your own party?" Henry asked, showing up in front of them and hugging Rory, "Happy Birthday."  
  
She grinned, returning the friendly hug, "Thanks. And you know we have to be."  
  
He did the whole hand slap-knuckle hit thing with Blake, "Happy birthday, man."  
  
"Thanks." they talked for a little while until a slow song came on and he took Lane away to dance. Rory smiled leaning against the wall and talking to Jess and Blake until her brother announced, "I'm gonna go find Maddy."  
  
She nodded, "Kay. Bye."  
  
He hugged her gently, "Bye. See ya, Jess." the boy nodded and walked away.  
  
Rory turned to Jess, "Looks like it's just you and me."  
  
He leaned beside her, "Looks like it. So, how's it feel to be-" he glanced at the clock, "two and a half hours away from being sixteen?"  
  
She smiled, shrugging, "Invigorating."  
  
"Oh yeah?"  
  
She nodded, "Yeah," looking over at all the people, she smiled when a new song came on and turned to Jess, "All Apologies?"  
  
He smirked, "Just for you. Come on, we're gonna dance."  
  
Rory grinned, taking his hand, "To Nirvana?"  
  
"Of course." he pulled her to the floor and they started dancing. Something about this song reminded her of Jess. 'What else should I be? All apologies. What else should I say? Everyone is gay.' oh yes, that was it. This wasn't really a song to dance to. It was close enough to a slow song, but you could still move to it.  
  
When it was over she grinned, hugging Jess tightly, he knew how much she loved that song, "I can't believe you actually played it for me."  
  
He shrugged, "It's your birthday." a small smile crossed his lips as he glanced over her shoulder. "I think my turn's up."  
  
"What?"  
  
Jess nodded, "Looks like your boyfriend wants a turn." he smiled, kissing her cheek, "Happy birthday, babe."  
  
"Thanks." she turned and they walked their separate ways. Jess most likely to find Paris and she walked to Tristan. "Hey." she kissed him lightly.  
  
"Hey," he smiled lightly, "sorry I'm late."  
  
She shook her head, "No problem."  
  
"Happy birthday." he leaned down and captured her lips in a slow kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist.  
  
They were interrupted when Louise and Madeline appeared, "Oh, get a room." Rory pulled away and rolled her eyes, looking at the two girls.  
  
Madeline smiled, "Happy Birthday."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
They were distracted when they heard someone yell 'keg stand!' Madeline and Louise laughed. Rory looked at Tristan, "That was Jess." They walked into the hall, towards one of the kegs, and they saw that Baker and Blake were each holding one of Jess's legs, and he was upside down. Rory shook her head, resting her forehead in her hand to keep from laughing. They put his legs down and he swayed slighting, holding his balled fists up victoriously like he'd just won some competition as people cheered.  
  
HALF AN HOUR LATER  
  
Rory sat on the counter, Lane on one side and Madeline on the other. Also in the kitchen were Blake, Tristan, Jess, Paris, Louise, Baker, Henry, and a few other people she knew, but didn't really talk to. Tristan pulled the nozzle of a funnel away from his mouth and Blake laughed, "That's six," he said, placing the empty beer can next to the other five. He looked around, "Anyone else up to it?" he asked.  
  
Rory slid off the counter, "I will."  
  
"You sure?" he asked.  
  
"Positive."  
  
"You hate beer."  
  
"Hey, do you not want me to?"  
  
"No, I think it'll be great." he held the funnel straw out to her and tossed the actual funnel to Louise, who was on the counter.  
  
"Just open the back of your throat." Henry told her.  
  
"And don't try to swallow." Baker said, smirking.  
  
"And put your head back." Tristan added, curling his hand around the back of her head, and she let her neck relax as his hand moved down slowly, "Okay." he pulled his hand away.  
  
Louise popped the top of a beer and glanced at Blake, who nodded. She held it over the opening and poured it out, it was obvious that Rory almost gagged, but she took the whole thing in five seconds. She pulled the hose out of her mouth and shook her head, looking at her brother. They were all silent until she spoke, "That's disgusting." she turned to Louise, nodding, "Do another one." her friend laughed, but grabbed another can.  
  
Within the next hour, all of them had funneled at least four beers (Lane) and at the most, eight (Jess). Tristan was leaning against the counter and Rory was resting her back against his chest, Tristan's arms wrapped around her waist as he kissed her neck gently. She was talking to Lane, but had stopped for a moment having forgotten what she was saying. Tristan leaned down and bit her earlobe gently. She smiled, turning in his arms. She closed her eyes, stepping back and swaying slightly.  
  
"You okay?" Tristan asked, putting his hands on her hips to steady her.  
  
Rory blinked slowly, "Yeah, I'm just....tired." she looked up at him, "Can we go?"  
  
"Yeah, sure." they announced that they would be going and everyone said goodbye and told Rory happy birthday one more time before they walked out. She looked back at Louise, who caught her eye and gave her a small, reassuring smile. Rory returned it and followed Tristan out.  
  
Rory leaned against the door to Tristan's room. The dark cherry wood cool against her back. She smiled at him as he shrugged off his jacket, throwing it to the floor carelessly. He looked up at her, smiling, "What?"  
  
Rory shook her head, "Nothing."  
  
Tristan walked over to her, pulling her to him, "So, you are officially sixteen in-" he glanced at the digital clock on the nightstand, "-seven minutes, how's it feel?"  
  
"I'll tell you in seven minutes." she rested her head on his shoulder, "But right now, I'm thinking it'll be a pretty good year."  
  
"Yeah?" he asked, leaning down.  
  
She smiled slightly, "Yeah." Tristan kissed her slowly, unsure of exactly what she wanted. He felt her pull him further down, and thinking, 'what the hell', he slid his hands under her shirt, kissing down her neck and pulling it over her head.  
  
NEXT MORNING  
  
Rory woke up slowly, feeling Tristan stir beside her. She closed her eyes, fighting the painful throbbing that was rising in her torso. Tristan had done his best to be gentle, but it had still felt like he was ripping her open. If that was sex, then the entire world was freaking out over nothing. It wasn't his fault, she knew that, but she'd still have to lie about the pain. She knew that most girls didn't like their first time, but holy shit, did it always hurt that bad? She was for once glad how experienced he was. If she'd been with someone who hadn't known what they were doing, she probably wouldn't have been able to go through with it after the initial pain.  
  
Tristan opened his eyes, leaning over to kiss her lightly. "How do you feel?"  
  
She sat up, "Okay." he just nodded, and although she knew he could tell she was lying, he didn't call her on it.  
  
"I'm really sorry, I tried everything I could think of to make it easier-"  
  
She shook her head, placing a finger to his lips, "It's fine. I'll live."  
  
"I know it hurt." he rested his arm along the pillow that was beside her leg, and he rubbed her thigh lightly.  
  
She smiled slightly, "I was forewarned. I'm fine, really. We'll try again, trust me." she kissed him slowly, "So, let me get this straight, my parents think I'm at Louise's, and that Blake's here, while Lane's mom thinks that she's spending the night with Madeline for a bible group tomorrow morning, and Luke has no clue where Jess is."  
  
Tristan thought for a second, "Yeah, I think that's right. And Blake is really at Madeline's, Lane is really with Henry, Baker I'm guessing never left after the party, and Jess is, of course, with Paris." he said, kissing her again.  
  
Rory smiled, "We're so fucked if we get found out."  
  
"Well, yeah." he grinned, "but that's what's hilarious about it."  
  
She laughed, "Yeah, you're not the one who's screwed if they find out."  
  
"I would be."  
  
"And how is that?"  
  
"Your parents would forbid you to ever come near me again."  
  
"True." she said, laying down beside him, and he wrapped his arms around her. "I should probably go soon."  
  
He kissed the top of her head, "Alright."  
  
Rory traced his chest slowly with her finger before closing her eyes and snuggling closer to him. Tristan was on his back and Rory's head was on his chest. She looked up at him and moved up his body so that they were even. She leaned down and kissed him slowly, closing her eyes and sighing silently as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her down against him. She pulled away after a moment, "I love you." she said quietly.  
  
Tristan kissed her lightly, "I love you too."  
  
NEXT NIGHT  
  
Rory and Blake looked at each other grimly, "Ready?" he asked, both dreading the social party.  
  
She nodded, "Ready."  
  
Blake shrugged, "It won't be so bad. At least Tristan and Madeline will be there."  
  
She nodded, "Yeah, I guess."  
  
"Don't think I don't know." he said, not looking at her.  
  
"Don't know what?"  
  
"What happened last night after you and Tristan left."  
  
"What happened?" she asked innocently.  
  
He just gave her a sideways glance, "Just don't get hurt."  
  
"I won't."  
  
Blake looked over at her before smirking lightly, "I know you won't." he rang the doorbell, they'd driven separately from their parents. Well, SHE had driven. Blake failed his test. Something about running a red light. He had to go back in three weeks for a retest.  
  
The door opened to reveal a maid. She smiled, "Mister and Miss Hayden."  
  
"Hey Carla." Rory said, walking in, closely followed by her brother. The door shut behind them and they looked around slowly. Rory inhaled deeply, "Okay."  
  
Blake put his hand in the small of her back, pushing her forward lightly, "Just breathe."  
  
She rolled her eyes, "Ha ha." her brother looked at her with a knowing smirk. She kept her eyes forward, "I'm working on it." it wasn't like they'd never been to parties like this. But it was never thrown for them. They had no idea what to expect.  
  
Ten minutes later, they were standing with their grandparents and being shown off. Blake gave Rory a side long glance and she nodded. A few minutes later they slowly edged away, needing to get away from the 'elders'. She spotted Madeline and Louise. "Hey." she called.  
  
They turned and smiled, "Hey." Madeline said as they walked over.  
  
"We were just wondering where you were." Louise said.  
  
"Well here we are." Blake kissed Madeline lightly.  
  
She smiled, grabbing his hand, "So, did you get your license?"  
  
"No. He ran a red light." Rory told her.  
  
Louise and Madeline laughed while Blake stuck his tongue out at his sister. "Yeah. It sucks too, because our grandparents already bought us Landrovers, but I can't drive mine until I 'Learn how to properly navigate a vehicle suitable for the road.' to quote my grandfather."  
  
"Did you get yours, Rory?" Louise asked.  
  
She nodded, "Yeah. And I got first pick of the cars."  
  
"What's the difference?" Madeline asked.  
  
"Just the color. I decided to be nice and take the tan one to leave him the black." she said, nodding to her brother.  
  
He smiled sweetly, "And I love her forever for it."  
  
Madeline rolled her eyes, "Come on. Oh, happy birthday again, Rory." she said before leading him away.  
  
Louise turned to Rory, "So, Tristan was looking for you."  
  
"Was he?" she asked, smiling.  
  
"Yes." she grinned, biting her lip while her friend looked off into space, "Details, Rory. Details!"  
  
Rory laughed, "What do you want to know?"  
  
"Everything. How much did it hurt? What led up to it? How long did it last? Everything."  
  
Rory smiled, "Well, it hurt like hell. I swear, I though I was going to die. My legs hurt like hell. But I mean, he did everything he could to make it less painful." she added quickly. "We were just in his room and it kind of....happened. And you think I really know how long it lasted?"  
  
Louise shrugged, "Not really. Did you cry?"  
  
"A little, I think." she said uncertainly.  
  
Louise nodded, looking at a spot a few yards behind her friend and she said quietly, "Yeah, well sometimes that reaction can't be helped."  
  
Rory looked at her strangely and turned to see Tristan walking towards them. He smiled light upon reaching her, "Hey." he kissed her gently.  
  
She smiled, "Hey."  
  
Louise nodded, "Hey."  
  
Tristan looked up, just noticing her. He nodded, "Hey."  
  
Louise looked at Rory nodding awkwardly, "Hey."  
  
Her friend nodded as well, "Hey."  
  
"Well, I see Hunter McCully, and he owes me an explanation as to why he wasn't in science on Thursday and left me without a lab partner.......so I'm gonna go and I'll se you two later."  
  
Rory nodded, "Bye."  
  
The blonde smiled, "Bye."  
  
Tristan broke in, "Bye."  
  
"Bye."  
  
"Bye." Rory said.  
  
Louise looked at her, "Bye." and she walked away before either of her friends could speak again.  
  
Tristan watched her leave, "She knows, doesn't she?" he asked, looking down at his girlfriend.  
  
Rory nodded, "Yeah. I was with her when I got the prescription." He grinned, closing his eyes. Rory tilted her head to the side, "What?"  
  
He shook his head, "Nothing."  
  
"Tell me."  
  
"It's just......Louise."  
  
Rory laughed, "You know you love her."  
  
ONE HOUR LATER  
  
Rory leaned against the balcony, closing her eyes as the cool November air circled her. Her stomach was rumbling, she'd eaten way too much. Jess had been wide eyed as he was the only one who realized that she was on her third plate, and had eaten more than even himself. He'd just smirked at her, knowing that she'd be in pain later. And she hated him for it.  
  
She heard the door open and someone walk onto the balcony quietly. "Hey."  
  
She turned, "Hey."  
  
Tristan walked over to her, leaning against the rail beside her. "I got your present."  
  
She clapped excitedly, standing up straight, "You got me a present?!"  
  
"It is your birthday." he said, laughing at her.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"You sure you want it?"  
  
"Do you know you're talking to? I love presents. I LIVE for presents. It's all your good for. Didn't you ever wonder why I like having a rich boyfriend?"  
  
"Well, it's good to feel needed." he said sarcastically.  
  
"Oh, you love it." Rory said, smiling, "Now gimme."  
  
He shrugged, "I just don't know."  
  
"Don't know what?"  
  
"If I should give it to you."  
  
"What are you talking about?! It's present. For me."  
  
"Yes it is."  
  
"I'm not supposed to pay you back for it."  
  
He smiled, "Now where does it say that?"  
  
She opened her mouth, but could think of nothing to say, so she snapped it shut and stepped closer, "Tristan," she wrapped her arms around him, under his coat, "If you love me them you'll want to give me my present." she said before kissing him lightly, pulling his bottom lip between hers.  
  
She slipped her hand into the pocket on the inside of his jacket and he pulled away, "It's not in there."  
  
She huffed, crossing her arms playfully, "Evil."  
  
He laughed, "You really want it?"  
  
"I REALLY want it!" she said excitedly.  
  
He sighed playfully and reached into the inside pocket she hadn't felt and pulled out a small box, handing it to her. She narrowed her eyes, smiling as she took it from his out-stretched hand. She pulled the top off and gasped as a jewelry case was revealed. She looked up at him, "What is it?"  
  
He smiled, "Open it."  
  
Rory cracked the top open and her jaw dropped, it was a necklace with a diamond in the shape of a heart inside the outline of a star on a silver chain. She looked up at him, "I can't take this."  
  
He chuckled, "Yes you can."  
  
"No, I, oh my God, Tristan- this is beautiful."  
  
"You like it?"  
  
"It's perfect. Did you pick it out?"  
  
He shrugged, "I picked out a couple things I thought you'd like and got a woman's opinion."  
  
She smiled, looking back down at it, "Will you put it on me?" she asked.  
  
He held his hand out and she set the case in his palm. She turned around and held her hair up; he clasped it, leaving a soft kiss on the back of her neck. Rory shivered slightly and dropped her hair back down, turning and wrapping one hand around the back of Tristan's head, pulling his lips down to hers. He wrapped one arm around her waist, the other resting behind her on the rail. He couldn't believe it. Less than a month after he'd met Rory, she'd been his, now he'd been the first one to claim her. She was his now. She'd been his by right. No one else had the right to touch her. It wouldn't have been fair if they had. She was his....only his. She was amazing and now he had her.  
  
He just had to get through the party at her house, the one with her whole town, including Dean. If he could just get through tomorrow night then he'd be fine.  
  
**_Want to know who you are _**

**_Want to know where to start _**

**_I want to know what this means _**

**_Want to know how to feel _**

**_Want to know what is real _**

**_I_****_ want to know everything _**

**_Everything........_**


	13. Worst December

A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or the song _'Worst December'_ by Sugarcult.

**All I wanna do **

**Is lie in bed with you **

**All I really ever need is you **

**All I gotta do **

**Is give up all I have **

**To be with you**  
  
Tristan pulled into the Hayden's driveway. Well, that is to say he pulled up in front of their house. There was no room left in the driveway and the closest spot was halfway down the street. It seemed as if the entire town of Stars Hollow was deserted, everyone was here. He guessed that most people had walked.  
  
Tristan opened his door and stepped into the street, Madeline climbed out of the passenger side door. Baker had driven Louise, Henry was five minutes behind them, and Paris was already here. Baker's Corvette slid into view and Tristan and Madeline made their way towards the house. When they got in view of the porch, Tristan saw Rory talking heatedly to someone whose back was to them. But he definitely recognized the mushroom that guy called hair. Dean. Rory looked past Dean and saw Tristan. She stopped talking and ran past him, jumped the stairs and ran to Tristan, barely slowing down once she reached him and causing him to stagger back three steps with the impact. But she didn't give him time to react before she curled one hand around the back of his head and brought his face down to her and delivered a mind blowing kiss.  
  
He was caught off guard and failed to react instantly, which gave her time to gain control as she pulled his bottom lip between her teeth and sucked on it gently before brushing her tongue across his top teeth. Once he got his bearings, Tristan wrapped one arm around her waist tightly and his other hand became tangled in her hair. He tilted her head back and took control of the kiss. She pulled back a moment later, breathing heavily. Tristan opened his mouth slightly, unsure of what to say. He looked up at the porch to Dean staring at them, his jaw dropped. Tristan smirked, so Mary wanted to make Bag Boy jealous? He could do that.  
  
He leaned down and captured her lips again, pulling her closer to him. Tristan deepened the kiss, sliding his hands down to rest in Rory's back pockets. He could almost feel Dean's eyes digging into his skull, but he didn't care. He thought it was hilarious. He'd had to compete with this guy when he first met Rory, and he'd been competing with him even after the idiot had lost her. Even after Tristan had gotten her, he still felt as if he was in some competition with Dean. But not anymore. He had no doubt now that Rory was his. And he'd beat the shit out of Dean if he so much as came near his girl again.  
  
He pulled away and Rory smiled at him, "Hey." she whispered.  
  
He smiled, "Hey." Tristan glanced over at Dean who looked as if he was hit by a bus, "What was that about?"  
  
She shook her head, "He was trying to convince me that we were still right for each other." Tristan's eyebrows arched. "I know, crazy, right?" she kissed him lightly, "Come on, let's go inside."  
  
Tristan wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her temple gently as they made their way into the house. Rory nodded to her ex-boyfriend as they passed him, and Tristan grinned gleefully, "Hey Dean."  
  
**NEXT MORNING**  
  
Rory woke up in Tristan's bed, his forearm as her pillow and her head turned away from him, her body angled slightly away, she'd moved in her sleep. Okay, so maybe that time was easier, but it still hurt. Maybe next time she'd get that mind blowing fulfillment she always heard about. Tristan stirred, his eyes opening slowly. He looked over at her, "Hey."  
  
She smiled, "Hey."  
  
"How do you feel?"  
  
She shrugged, "It didn't hurt as much."  
  
Tristan sighed, frustrated, hitting his head on the pillow, "Damn it."  
  
Rory smiled, "It's okay, Tristan."  
  
He shook his head, "It's just different for me, I've never dealt with a girl's initial pain before and it's frustrating."  
  
Her forehead wrinkled and she said sarcastically, "Sorry."  
  
He looked over at her and laughed, rolling his eyes, "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that."  
  
She smiled, snuggling against his side, "I know."  
  
**THAT NIGHT  
**  
Tristan slid his keys into his pocket, He'd just dropped Rory off at her house after they'd gotten back from the mall.....which she'd forced him to go to. It had been a teacher work day, so they didn't have school. It was a good thing too, because she didn't have a uniform at his house and for some reason she'd been in his bed when he woke up. He passed his father's office and stopped, walking backwards until he was standing directly in front of the door. He heard his mother's voice. She was yelling, but it was muffled by the thick wood. He couldn't make out anything. It was strange enough that his father was home now, usually he would have still been at the office. His mother's voice became more frantic until she stopped suddenly. And he heard his father mutter something. There were footsteps as his mother walked towards the door. He moved so that she couldn't see him when the door opened and she strode down the hall with a satisfied smirk.  
  
He glanced into the office and saw that his father's forehead was resting in the palm of his hand. Tristan bit his lip and looked around the hall before slowly slipping into his room and closing the door. Something within him shook. He'd never seen his father looking like that. Sad. Defeated. Unsure. Those were traits a Dugrey wasn't allowed to have. There was a sharp rapping on his door. "Come in." he called.  
  
The door opened a few inches, "Mister Dugrey, your father wants to speak to you in his study." the maid closed the door, Tristan never saw her face, and he didn't recognize the voice. She was probably one of the new maids her mother hired every few weeks.  
  
He looked around, taking several deep breaths. There was no telling what his father wanted. Tristan slid off of his bed and walked slowly down the hall, the light escaping from under the crack of the heavy door of his father's study seemed to cut right through him. He suddenly found himself right in front of the door. He raised his fist and knocked three times.  
  
"Come in."  
  
Tristan pushed the door open and walked in slowly, closing it behind him, "You wanted to see me?" he asked.  
  
His father nodded, motioning towards the chair in from if him, "Sit." he did so obediently. His father scrutinized him, "We don't have much of a relationship, do we, Tristan?" it was obviously not a question he wanted answered. He continued, "I don't know what's going on in your life, I don't know your interests, your hobbies..." he trailed off, thinking, "But I do know that you're dating a certain girl." Tristan didn't speak, he had no idea where this was going. "I saw her this morning before you left. I don't blame you. If I were your age I would bring her to my bed as well." Tristan felt his hands ball into fists. "And I'm not saying don't have your fun, because it's healthy to relieve sexual tension, but don't get too involved. You're too young."  
  
Tristan could feel liquid fire pounding in his ears. He didn't trust himself to speak. He loved her. Fucking loved her, and his father didn't even know, "So you'd rather have me fuck random people than stay with one girl?"  
  
"Watch your language." he said warningly.  
  
Tristan laughed bitterly, "You have no problem telling your sixteen year old son to go have sex, but you can't handle a little swearing?"  
  
His father's jaw clenched, "Tristan, please don't make this any harder than it has to be. Just break it off with the girl."  
  
"No."  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"I said no."  
  
"You will stop seeing Rory Hayden. She's not for you."  
  
"You don't know that."  
  
"Yes I do."  
  
"Tristan, I'm pulling the parent card on this one. You will stop seeing her."  
  
"Fuck you."  
  
He was silent, "Excuse me?" he asked, deathly quiet.  
  
"I love her-"  
  
His father interrupted him, "No, you do not."  
  
"Yes, I do. You can't tell me who I love and who I don't-"  
  
His father cut him off, "You're sixteen years old, you don't know what love is!"  
  
"Oh, and you do?"  
  
"Of course I do."  
  
"Then you know how I feel about her!" he yelled, why wouldn't his father listen to him?  
  
"Tristan, you may think you love her, but you're just lusting after her, and passion fades! It won't last till the end of the school year!"  
  
Tristan chewed the inside of his cheek, "You know all about that, don't you? Is that why you fuck your secretary?"  
  
His fist came down hard on his desk, "Never speak to me like that again. You do not have real feelings for this girl-"  
  
Tristan cut him off, "Yes I do. I love her!"  
  
"Fine!" his father yelled, surprising him. "I didn't want it to have to come to this. Your mother is worried. This girl is changing you, we don't even know who you are anymore-"  
  
"You never did." he muttered.  
  
He was ignored, "She's changing you, and your mother doesn't like it, so you leave us with no choice. I don't know how to handle you anymore. We only have two options." Tristan looked up at him, his eyes narrowed, "Either break up with her, or you're going to Military School."  
  
Tristan sat in shock, "What?" he stuttered.  
  
His father sighed, rubbing his eyes, "Tristan, I really don't want to do this, but I don't know how to control you. You know that Lorelai Gilmore put your mother through hell in high school. I don't approve one bit of her daughter seducing you."  
  
Tristan's eyes narrowed, "What the hell are you talking about? Rory never seduced me."  
  
"You chased her."  
  
"Yes, I did."  
  
"You got in a fight over her."  
  
Tristan was taken aback, "Yes."  
  
"You sent a boy to the hospital and almost broke his nose just two weeks ago."  
  
Tristan leaned back in his chair, "Yeah, I did."  
  
"For her."  
  
"She has a name." Tristan snapped.  
  
His father's jaw clenched, "For Rory?"  
  
Tristan nodded, "Anything for Rory."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I love her."  
  
His father rolled his eyes, "So I've heard. But what did Nathan Turner do to you that made you want to send him to the hospital?"  
  
"He was talking shit about my girl."  
  
"About Rory."  
  
"Yes, about Rory." Tristan rolled his eyes.  
  
His father sighed, shaking his head, "And her brother and another boy that they're friends with was involved in this fight too, weren't they?"  
  
"Yeah. Blake kicked Patrick's ass for talking about Madeline and Jess beat the shit out of Cole for talking about his best friend."  
  
His father shook his head, "You're getting into fights, you're spending all your time away from home. You've stopped talking to some of your oldest friends. You've changed, Tristan. And the only thing I can think of is to get you away from this girl, so either do it yourself and break it off willingly, or I'll make sure you never see her again."  
  
Tristan's jaw clenched, he wanted nothing more than to punch that man in the face, "I will not break up with her. I won't let her know that my parents are so bitter from a high school fight, and are such fucking cowards that they can't handle to see me in love with her. I won't tell her anyone is ashamed of her, because she's amazing, and she doesn't deserve it."  
  
Mr. Dugrey nodded, his jaw set, "Fine. Pack your bags. You're leaving for North Carolina in two weeks." he looked back down at his papers and acted as if his son wasn't there. Tristan stared at him in disbelief. He looked back up, "You can go." Tristan stood and walked out in silence. He was really going. He really had to leave. What kind of immature bastard would send away his teenage son because of his girlfriend?  
  
Tristan shook his head, looking around the light hall, he had to get out. This place was suffocating him. He couldn't handle it. He had to leave. He reached into his pocket and before he knew it, he was in his car and was functioning on auto pilot. He didn't even know where he was going until he saw a familiar sign. 'Welcome To Stars Hollow'. He parked a few yards down the street so that his car was hidden from view when standing in the Hayden's driveway and made his way around back. He climbed the trellis, don't ask how. He'd never climbed one in his life. But he made it up and to Rory's room.  
  
Tristan raised his fist to knock, but stopped himself....what was he doing? What did he think this would accomplish? But then he realized that it didn't really matter. He needed her, he needed her right then more than he'd ever needed anything in his life. He knocked on the balcony door and he heard her jump. She made her way slowly to the door and was surprised that she didn't even look to see who it was before she opened the door.  
  
Rory tilted her head, surprised, but she barely had time to whisper his name before he crushed his lips to her, silencing her. He attacked her lips, sucking, biting, and licking. She closed the balcony door and whispered in between kisses, never opening her eyes, "My parents won't be home for another three hours." she laced her fingers through his hair and pulled him in deeper.  
  
Tristan backed her up, and she was so lost in the passion of his scorching kiss and his wandering hands, that she couldn't get past the intensity of the moment and remember where she was. But when she felt the side of her bed hit her hip, she laid down, pulling Tristan to lay over her. He pulled her shirt off without waiting for her permission, and showered her neck and chest with kisses. He stopped for only a moment to look into her dark eyes, and she felt her entire body shudder at the lust in his eyes, "Good." he whispered, "This'll take a while." he went back to his assault on her skin.  
  
And what do you know? Third time's the charm.  
  
****

**So take a look around**

**All I wanna do **

**To be close to you **

**All I wanna do **

**To be next to you **

**All I want is you **

**To give up all I have to be **

**I can't remember why I'm here **

**If you'd let me spend my life with you**


	14. Crashing Down

A/N: I don't own _Crashing Down_ by Sugarcult. 

**I've got something up my sleeve that I don't want to show you **

**Cause every time I bleed I make a fool of me **

**I've got shaky little fingers, that hold on to your grip **

**You've got wrapped around my world **

**So tight that I can't breathe**

**I'm suffocating**

Rory slid her tank top back on, glancing over at Tristan. He was sitting on the bed, already fully dressed, leaning over with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. She tilted her head and walked over to him, standing in between his outstretched knees. Without looking up at her,  
Tristan slid his hands under her shirt to grip her hips and pulled her closer, resting his forehead on her flat stomach. Rory ran her fingers through his hair slowly and stood still for a few minutes. "Are you okay?" she whispered.

Tristan looked up, and Rory saw that his eyes were a stormy gray. "I'm fine." he said, knowing that he didn't sound honest.

She nodded, stepping out of his touch, "My parents will be home soon." she looked away.

He stood up, "Rory-" her head snapped around to looked at him. He opened his mouth, but said nothing.

She looked away, fighting back emotion, "Yeah. They'll be home soon."

Tristan shook his head, "Rory, I didn't mean to be like that."

"Like what?"

"I don't know, I just-" he sighed, "It's complicated."

Rory laughed, a gentle, patronizing laugh, "So uncomplicate it."

"I can't."

The corners of her mouth turned up-not in a smile, but in disbelief and obvious anger, "Right. You can leave now."

Tristan swore under his breath and ran his hand through his hair, "Rory, come on-" he grabbed her arm.

She twirled around to face him, "What?"

"Okay, I'm really screwing up right now."

"Yeah."

"Look, I just....." he trailed off, at a loss for words.

Rory rolled her eyes, "Look, Tristan, obviously something's going on with you right now and either you can't tell me about it, or you don't want to."

"I want to explain it to you, Ror, I really do."

Her lips were pursed as she watched him expectantly, "But..." she supplied for him.

Tristan shook his head, "I can't."

"You can't?"

"No."

Rory nodded, leaning against the wall, "Right, look Tristan, I'm not in the mood for this, okay? Please just go home." she looked away.

He let out a long breath, right hand running through his messy blonde hair, "Fine." he kissed her cheek lightly, "I'll call you."

"Bye." she said quietly, without looking at him.

"Bye." he slipped out of her door and onto the balcony.

Rory stayed in that same position, unmoving until she heard her parents come home ten minutes later, and she slipped under the rumpled covers that still smelled of Tristan, and fell asleep.

**NEXT MORNING**

Rory opened her eyes slowly and turned over to look at the clock. 11:30. They didn't have school for two weeks because of Christmas and New Years. She closed her eyes, turning over and curling into a ball until she heard her phone's shrill ring. She jumped and scrambled to answer it, "Hello?" she laid back down, closing her eyes and resting her arm across her forehead.

"Hey."

She sighed, "Tristan."

"Rory."

"What?"

"I need to see you."

She sat up, "What?"

"I just-" he stopped, taking a deep breath, "-look, I need to talk to you."

She rubbed her eyes wth her fingers impatiently. She was tired of his hot and cold mood swings,  
"Tristan, what the hell is wrong with you?"

"I don't know." she could hear the strain in his voice over the phone.

Rory closed her eyes, resting her forehead in the palm of her hand, "Look Tristan, I'm really worried about you, but if I don't know what's wrong with you then I can't help you. So please,  
just throw me something here. Anything." there was silcence on the other end. "Tristan?" she whispered.

After another moment he spoke quietly, "I love you, Rory." and then he hung up. She pulled the phone away from her ear and looked at it in disbelief before dropping it and closing he eyes,  
turning over and falling asleep.

**THAT AFTERNOON**

Rory woke up to see someone leaning over her, staring. She opened her eyes slowly, wanting to sink back into the covers and sleep, but couldn't with the way her brother was sitting over her. "Hey." Blake just stared back, disapproving. Rory's head cocked back, "What?"

"Oh nothing. It's just that I don't think visits from your boyfriend in the middle of the night would go over too well with mom and dad."

She rolled over so that her back was to him, "No? I thought they might encourage it."

"Rory, I'm serious."

She rolled back around, "Let it go, Blake. You've gone over to Madeline's in the middle of the night before."

"Yeah, but that's different."

Her eyebrows raised, "Oh?"

"Yeah."

"How so?"

"Well, she's a girl-"

"And just what the hell am I?"

"My sister." he said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Imagine that."

"Besides, she's my girlfriend."

"Tristan is my boyfriend-"

"-and you're the little sister. I can't just allow your boyfriend to come in in the middle of the night."

"Yeah, well you can't exactly stop it now either, can you?"

"Rory."

"Blake." she mocked, rolling her eyes.

"I'm serious."

"That makes two of us."

"Rory, look, I'm your brother, and I'm telling you not to do this."

She sat up, "He's one of your best friend!"

"Yeah, which is exactly why I know this is a bad idea!" he yelled.

She threw her hands in the air, "Well too bad, because you don't get a say in it!"

"Rory, please," he pleaded, "You're my twin sister, my little sister. My flesh and blood. I love you more than I love myself most of the time. And I'm telling you that you're making a mistake."

"How can you say that? You always defended Tristan in front of mom!"

He nodded, "Yeah. And I'd do it again in a heart beat. Because he's one of my best friends. And I know that if mom said you could never see him again then you'd just ignore her, but Rory please, you know that I would never get involved in this if I thought you wouldn't get hurt. Please think about what you're doing." he finished at a whisper, staring her squarely in the eyes.

She shook her head, fighting back emotion, "I love him." she whispered.

Blake looked away, "Yeah, I know. And that's what scares me."

"You mean, you don't love Madeline?" she asked in surprise.

Blake shook his head, "It's not that I have no feelings for her, it's just that I'm only sixteen. I can't love her yet. But I know that you're head over heels for Tristan, and that's what scares me. Ror, you're my best friend. I love you to death, and Tristan's like a brother to me, but I can't just sit back and watch you get in too deep. I won't let you."

"It's not your choice."

He nodded, standing up, "I know, and I respect that. Just please, think about it." he whispered,  
kissing his sister on the forehead before walking out of her room.

She stared at the door after he'd left, tears filling her eyes. Blake had never done anything like that before. He protected her, but always left her to make her own decisions. He'd never pleaded with her before. He'd never tried to reason with her. Why was everyone so against her and Tristan? She slid out of bed and threw on jeans and a t-shirt with a sweater over it before grabbing her keys and walking to her car simply yelling that she'd 'be back later' before walking out of the front door.

She pulled into the driveway of the Hartford address twenty minutes later, glancing over and sighing in relief that the garage was open, meaning neither of his parents were home. She walked to the front door, rubbing under her bloodshot red eyes, ringing the doorbell once before wrapping her arms tightly around herself to try and ward off the cold.

A hard looking woman answered the door, "Can I help you?" she had a thick French accent.

Rory swallowed the lump in her throat, "Is Tristan here?" she asked, tightening her grip around herself with one arm while the other hand went to play absentmindedly with the chain of the necklace Tristan had given her.

The woman shook her head, "I'm sorry, but you'll have to leave. Mister Tristan requested that he not be bothered with anyone."

"But I really need to see him-"

The woman cut her off, "I'm sorry, but that's not my concern. He said not to let anyone in to see him."

"Look, I understand that he said not to let anyone in, but I promise you that he'd say to let me in if you asked him."

"I'm sorry if you think that, but-" she was cut off by Tristan's voice.

"Who's at the door, Carla?" it sounded like he was coming down the stairs.

"A girl has come to see you. I asked her to leave, but she insists on seeing you. I'm terribly sorry." she said, looking at up the stairs apologetically and then at Rory accusingly.

"Who is it?" Tristan asked, finally coming into view, but he froze when he was her. He just stood there for a moment, taking in her wind whipped cheeks and red eyes. "Rory?" he whipered, as if he wasn't sure that it was her. She smiled weakly, biting her lip. Tristan looked at the maid as if there were something wrong with her, "Let her in!" she sprung from Rory's path inside as if there was a raging lion running at her. He walked to his girlfriend, gathering her in is arms as a new wave of tears started forming.

He held her as she cried, and the maid closed the door behind Rory, muttering apologies. "I'm so sorry, Mister Dugrey. I didn't know that she was to be let in-"

He shook his head, "Don't worry about it." She stopped apologizing, but still obviously felt guilty by the look on her face, and she curtsied before departing from the room. Tristan touched Rory's cheek gently, turning her up to face him, "Hey baby, what's wrong?" he whispered, his face inches from hers. She continued to sob quietly and Tristan placed slow, gentle kisses on her lips until she'd calmed down. He smiled gently once she stopped, "What happened?"

She sniffed, closing her eyes and shaking her head, "Everything has just sucked today." Tristan looked away guiltily, but was thankful when she didn't demand an explination for his late night visit. She looked up at him, "Why is everybody so against this?" she asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean your parents, my mom, half the people at school....." she looked away, shaking her head.

"But they don't matter."

Rory looked up at him, "Don't they?" she whispered.

He shook his head, "No. Has it ever seemed like they did?" he asked.

She inhaled a shaky breath, "At times."

Tristan looked away, "Rory, people are going to talk and they're going to make you feel like shit,  
but you can't let it get to you. What happened?"

Her head turned down, "Nothing."

He pushed her chin up gently to look at him, "Ror, babe, you don't usually come to my house crying. What the hell happened to make you cry like this?" She sighed, closing her eyes and rested her forehead on his chest. He looked down at her, touching her face, "Okay, let's go somewhere. We need to get out of here." He said, grabbing her hand and pulling her out of the house.

**WEDNESDAY (CHRISTMAS)**

Rory coughed, tossing Shane one of his wrapped gifts from under the tree while Blake was handed Lorelai one of hers. Every year it was the twins' job to hand out the gifts on Christmas,  
and they did it grudgingly because that meant that they had to get up earliest. Rory stood and walked over to one of the large recliners in the living room, the one that was holding Blake's gifts, and dropped it on top of his stack. "This one is for Juanita." Blake told his mother, reading the tag on one box.

Lorelai nodded towards the kitchen table, "Oh yeah, she was traveling to her son's for Christmas and I gave her off yesterday, but forgot to give that to her. Just set it on the table."

They finished passing out gifts and Rory sat on one of the large comfortable chairs that her gifts had been set next to, and grabbed one from Blake that was on the top. He smiled when he saw her grab his first, but didn't look up from his own present. Rory pulled off the wrapping paper to reveal a small cardboard box and she pulled off the top to reveal two tickets. She turned the over and screamed, "Oh my God, Blake!" she ran over to him and jumped, hugging him tightly.

"I take it you like it?" he asked, laughing.

"You-you, Weezer? How did you get these tickets? I thought the show was sold out."

He shrugged, grinning, "Connections, Rory, connections."

**THAT NIGHT**

"So, the first snow of the season is on Christmas." Tristan said, amused as Rory pulled him out of her house and into the front yard.

She turned around to face him, smiling, "Of course it is." she stepped closer to him through the three inches of powder, "Christmas is magical, as is the first snow of the season. It only makes sense that they come together."

He grinned at her, wrapping his arms around her waist, "It that so?"

She nodded as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "Mm-hm." a wide smile crossed her lip as she stepped out of his arms, turning her face up towards the falling snow, the hair around her face flipping from the bottom of the light blue beanie on her head. Tristan smiled,  
watching her. She looked over at him, still smiling lightly. The snow all around her made her hair look darker, her eyes brighter, and her cheeks and lips pinker. The pure white everywhere made every aspect of her so much more vivid. She stepped closer to him, wrapping her arms around his torso under his open jacket, a small smile playing on her lips. She leaned up, kissing him gently. Tristan looked down at her, his expression unreadable. Rory tilted her head, "You okay?" she whispered.

He shook his head, but answered, "Yeah. I'm fine."

She moved away a few inches, taking her arms from around him and took his hands, lacing their fingers together. Tristan looked down at their hands, swallowing the lump in his throat. She looked up at him, opening her mouth, but to stop her from asking any questions, he leaned down quickly and crushed his lips to hers, kissing her thoroughly, and when it was over, she looked at him uncertainly, but he just shook his head, leaning down again.

**We come crashing down **

**Every time we go this far again **

**We come crashing down **

**Every time we go this far again **

**Every time we go **

**I've got nothing that I'd hide **

**Except for that's inside **

**I keep it all locked up, in this prison we call love **

**I'm suffocating**

A/N: This chapter definitely isn't one of my best, I don't know what happened. Anyway, I started on it a few weeks ago, but couldn't think of anywhere to go with it, so sorry about that. But I now what's going on now for sure. So the next chapter should be out a lot sooner.


	15. Sixth Day Mark

A/N: I don't own _Sixth Day Mark_ by Vaya. 

**I really thought that we would make it through **

**Because I'm taking all of the time I need **

**Making the best of what it can be **

**I'm finally learning what you need now **

**Shoot it up and then stop until it fades **

**Welcome to my world of endless passions **

**Making out the lines until it happens **

**I'm tossing out the sixth day mark **

**Because you know that you're wrong**

Tristan sighed, running his hands through his hair, watching the phone as if it would suddenly catch fire. His knee was jumping nervously and his breathing was forced into a normal rhythm. He closed his eyes, lowering his head. Why was this so hard? She was just a girl. He was only sixteen. It shouldn't have been that big of a deal. But it was...why was that? He loved her, yeah,but it was just teenage love, wasn't it? No, he could answer that easily. Well, it could have been. Maybe. He sighed, standing up and walking around the room. This wasn't going to be easy.

A few nights ago they'd all gone to Baker's for his New Year's Eve party. It was crowded, wild, just like the rest of them. Rory had wanted to know what was wrong with him. She thought she'd done something, or maybe that he was just getting tired of her. And if he'd had any spine when it came to Lorelai Leigh Hayden, then he would have told her right then what was going on, or he would have broken up with her. But he didn't, not when it came to her. He knew that he was going to hurt her eventually, and it would be a lot worse if he did it the way he was planning to. The way he had to, right now, before his plane left in five hours. He glanced over at his packed suitcases; the maids had done it when he refused to.

So, instead of telling her what was really happening, he did the only this that he could think of, and kissed her. Luckily, she'd been asking him about it during the countdown to midnight, so she didn't think he was just kissing her to make her shut up. He continued pacing, glancing at the phone every few seconds....he had to call her. He couldn't just leave. He ran a hand over his face. He'd tired to make it work, and a part of him had really believed that it would work out. Man had he been wrong about that one. He'd taken his time with it, he wanted to figure something out, but he didn't think that would happen. This was better for her. He was finally doing something right....or so he hoped. He'd just recently realized that he hadn't done that much for Rory in the past, and this really wasn't as much for her as it was for him. But god did he love that girl. She drove him crazy, but he was wild about her none the less.

He couldn't do a long distance thing though...it would never work; besides, that would be pointless because she was the whole reason he was being sent away, although to his surprise, he didn't blame her. His stomached clenched uncomfortably as he picked up the phone and dialed her cell phone number. One ring: he felt his body warm up and his palms started sweating. Ring two: his legs started shaking and he had to sit on the bed. Ring three: his hand twitched and he had an undeniable urge to hang up the phone, and he'd almost convinced himself to peel the phone away from his ear when she answered, and his stomach dropped.

He heard her say hello, but it didn't quite register until he heard her say his name several times to get his attention. He closed his eyes, breathing in deeply and steadily. He got through the conversation, but didn't realize what was happening until the ring tone was droning through his ear. He closed his eyes slowly, hanging up the phone. One hour. He was supposed to meet Rory at Briscoe Park in one hour. He closed his eyes, rubbing his forehead. Shit.

**ONE HOUR LATER**

Tristan leaned against one of the ice covered trees, his left hand shoved into the pocket of his jacket while his right hand was holding a half smoked cigarette. His nerves were completely frazzled. He looked up, exhaling a long breath and jumped when he heard someone behind him. "So, are you going to tell me what's going on with the whole caveman thing lately?"

He turned to face her, "What?"

Rory tilted her head, putting her hand on her hip, "You know, every time I try to talk to you, you kiss me just to make me shut up."

"That's not true."

"No? Ever since Christmas that's all that's happened. Whenever you get weird, which, by the way, has been a lot lately, and I try to figure out what's wrong, you kiss me so I won't ask questions. Caveman." He smiled, a small laugh escaping. Her eyes narrowed, "What?"

He shook his head, "Nothing." her eyebrow arched, and he continued, "Well, it's just that, with knowing you like I do, and knowing your family, I think it's funny that 'Caveman' is all you could come up with."

Her jaw dropped in mock anger and she punched him in the arm lightly, "Shut up." he laughed, grabbing her hand from his arm. He smiled, pulling her closer. And he almost brought her close enough that their bodies were pressed together, but he caught himself, and loosened his grip, looking at her for a moment before pulling away. Rory opened her mouth, but didn't say anything, looking down. "So are you going to tell me now? Or are we still just wasting time?"

Tristan sniffed because of the cold air, "Um, yeah, I'm gonna tell you now." he said quietly, not looking at her.

Her head shot up, surprised, "You are?"

He nodded, "Yeah."

She leaned back on her heels, sticking her hands in her pockets, "Okay..." Tristan coughed before looking up at the grey sky, and she saw him take a long drag from a cigarette in his hand that she hadn't noticed before. And that was when she realized that this was worse than she'd previously thought. Tristan didn't smoke often, and when he did it was because there was something he wanted to forget about. She took it from him, dropping it into the snow, "You'll get cancer if you don't stop that."

He looked at her, blowing out a cloud of smoke before swallowing the lump in his throat, "Rory, we've had fun, right?"

She took a step back uncertainly, "Um, yeah, I guess."

He stepped closer, "I mean, we have had fun. You never doubted how I felt, did you?" he asked.

She opened her mouth uncertainly, but closed his without uttering a sound, and she shook her head, "No. I never wondered how you felt."

"Good." Tristan nodded, "That's good."

She cocked her jaw to the side, shaking her head, "Tristan, what the hell is this?"

He looked away from her stepping closer to the tree, "Because I mean, I wouldn't have wanted you to doubt that, ever-"

"Tristan." she cut him off, and he looked over at her, "You're being so sporadic and jumpy." she shook her head, looking at him sadly, "What's going on?" her arms fell to her sides, and he could see that she was tired. Her hair was flat and her skin was paler than normal.

He sighed, stepping closer as he rubbed his neck, sighing, he didn't want to do this. God, he really didn't think he could. Not now that he was looking at her, seeing her standing in the snow, freezing to death just because he said that he needed to talk to her. He closed his eyes, turning away from her. This was best. And she'd hate him for it, but if she really thought about it then she'd know that it was hard on him. She'd realize that what he was about to tell her was the hardest thing he'd ever had to say. Tristan took a deep breath before turning back around to face her, "I don't..." he looked away, running his hand through his hair nervously, "I don't need a girlfriend right now, Rory."

At first she showed no emotion, but simply stood still as the snow began to fall again, an expressionless mask on her face. She shook her head, "What?"maybe she wanted to believe she hadn't heard him right, or maybe she really hadn't.

Tristan turned towards her, "Rory, look..."he trailed off. He'd expected her to interrupt him. He sighed, running his hand through his hair, "...I just-" he shook his head, looking her in the eye, "-can't."

She shook her head lightly, stale amusement in her voice, "You're joking, right?"

"No..." he said slowly, unsure of what exactly was going on.

Rory nodded, biting her lip, now there really was humor in her voice, but it was dry. She shrugged, "Well I guess I should be impressed."

He shook his head, "What?"

She smiled, "I mean, you know, I should be impressed that you lasted this long."

"Rory, what-"

"Because everyone said that once you got what you wanted then you'd be gone." his jaw dropped and a look of horror overtook his face. That was why she though he was doing this? He opened his mouth to explain, but she cut him off. "I mean, what was it? Three weeks? I must say, Tristan, that's impressive. You lasted a lot longer after the fact than most people thought you would."

"Rory, no. That's not what this is about-"

Once again, she cut him off, "Isn't it?"

"No. You know that."

She laughed, tilting her head, "Oh, so now you're going to tell me what I think? I mean my god, even Blake knew that something bad would come out of this, and he never got involved in my love life before you-"

Tristan rolled his eyes, "That was because you were with Dean."

She stopped, snorting, "What the hell was that supposed to mean?"

"Dean couldn't have had you no matter how much he wanted it. You would've never given out."

Rory's jaw dropped and she stepped closer dangerously, "Oh, so you're saying that you're the only person I'd ever 'give out to'?"

He shook his head, realizing that he'd insulted her, "No, I didn't mean that."

"Then what exactly did you mean?"

"I mean that you deserve better than Dean, and you knew that in the back of your mind the entire time, so you wouldn't have made a mistake with him."

"So you're saying that you're better than Dean?" she asked hotly, tilting her head.

"Better for you than he is, yes."

"Well maybe if I'd fucked Dean he wouldn't have walked away. Maybe I should've just stayed with him; at least he wouldn't have used me and then left."

Tristan stepped back a pace, that last stab had hurt more than he'd like to admit, "Rory, I never used you." He said quietly. She just looked away, crossing her arms over her chest. And she knew it was true. She knew how he felt about her, even if she wouldn't admit it right then. He closed his eyes. Dean. It was always Dean. He looked back up at her, "I can't control anything that's going on with me right now. We can't be together anymore."

Her lips pursed and she tilted her head, resting her hand on her hip, she couldn't even feel the cold anymore, "Oh?"

He inhaled deeply, "Yes."

"And why is that?" sarcasm was thick in her voice.

"Because." he looked away, "I'm going to military school."

She was frozen for a moment, her mind racing faster than she could keep up with. Once she regained feeling in her body, she blinked rapidly, moving her head straight, and she swallowed the insult that had been resting on her tongue only moments before, "What?"

"Military school. In North Carolina; I'm leaving in like, three hours."

Rory exhaled slowly to stop herself from making a strange noise. "What did you do?" she asked, unable to think of anything he could have done that was that bad, but then again, he had been acting strange for the past few weeks.

He sniffed, the cold was making his nose run. It could have been the emotion, but he'd never admit that. "I didn't do anything."

"But you had to have done something, Tristan. You don't just get sent down the entire east coast for nothing!"

He turned on her, his anger building. He knew it wasn't her fault, and he really wasn't mad at her. But he was mad at everything else, "Look, Rory, shit happens, okay?" she leaned away from him, taken aback. He shook his head and turned away, walking anywhere that was away from her, but she wasn't ready to let him walk away without an explanation.

She went after him quickly, grabbing his arm, "Tristan, what the hell happened? You keep saying that it wasn't me, so now tell what it was!"

Tristan stopped walking, but didn't turn to look at her. His breathing was labored, and he shook his head, eyes watering from the cold. "It was nothing." he said quietly.

Rory bit her lip, sniffing lightly, and they both knew it wasn't from the cold. She released his arm, stepping away. He walked towards his car, not looking at her. But she wouldn't have noticed if he had. She was looking around as if she didn't know what was going on. And Tristan turned around after he'd gotten a few yards away, looking at her a last time. The sharp wind was blowing into her face, and her hair was blown away from her shoulders. She turned and saw him looking at her. They stood there for a few minutes, neither moving, until at last Rory turned, walking to the second parking lot, where her own car was.

And that was the last image he had of her, a perfect, snow angel, walking away from him. And he deserved it. Tristan closed his eyes, slamming the door to his car and starting it. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. He was supposed to tell his dad to go fuck off, and he had, but it didn't do any good. He'd still lost Rory, he was still on his way to North Carolina, and he hadn't gotten anywhere. He rolled his neck in a circle, closing his eyes and resting his head against the rest as hot air warmed his limbs.

**THAT NIGHT**

Tristan stood in the airport, his luggage already loaded, and he didn't have a carry on. Surprisingly, his parents had escorted him here. That was more than he'd expected. His mother kept fiddling with her hands, "And you have everything you need?" she asked, looking around anxiously.

He nodded, "Yeah, mom, I have everything."

"Are you sure?"

Tristan looked out of the large window, "Positive."

She smoothed his sleeve, "Well, even if you don't, we can always send it to you, can't we?"

"Yeah, you can." he didn't know why she was pretending to care so much, there was no one here they would ever see again.

There was a call for all first class passengers to board, and his mother smiled, although it didn't quite reach her eyes him. She hugged him stiffly, an unfamiliar position, and his father shook his hand. "How long will I be gone?" Tristan asked.

"We'll see."

Tristan nodded, pulling his hand from his father's grip, "I guess I'll see you later, then." his mother looked as if she wanted to say something, but she didn't, so he turned.

"Tristan." his mother called as he walked away from them. He turned around to look at her, but didn't say anything. "You're not still mad, are you? About that Hayden girl?" He didn't answer, but just turned, handing the woman at the booth his ticket before walking to the terminal, and when he turned back, his mother was still watching him. She waved, but instead of acknowledging her, he walked through the hall, wishing she hadn't come.

**No I don't think that **

**No I won't step back **

**It's all on you **

**Just when the picture says in motion **

**I find myself the sky has fallen **

**I've always been the imperial one **

**I've always been the one with reason **

**And if you've ever thought it through **

**You know it is the hardest thing I've had to do**


	16. Pretty Girl

A/N: I am so sorry for the lack of updates. I've been really busy lately, even though that's not an excuse. And I would never abandon this story. I love this story, it's my baby. Heehee. I don't own the song. It's _Pretty Girl_ by Sugarcult. 

_**Pretty girl is suffering while he confesses everything **_

_**Pretty soon she'll figure out what his intentions were about **_

_**And that's what you get for falling again **_

_**You can never get 'em out of your head **_

_**And that's what you get for falling again **_

_**You can never get 'em out of your head**_

Tristan walked slowly into his room. He looked around, swallowing the lump in his throat before tossing his bag onto the unoccupied bed. There were two day-bed size mattresses raised two feet off the hard floor, and he didn't have to look twice to know that he would likely feel that he was sleeping on springs. The room was small, and the only things in it were the beds, two sets of dressers, two desks, two lamps, a mirror, and a window. Oh, and the dark skinned sixteen year old boy lounging in a red bean bag chair.

He looked up when Tristan entered. "Hey, I'm Rick."

He nodded, "Tristan."

"How old are you?"

"Sixteen. You?"

He nodded, "Same." Tristan looked around the room, breathing in deeply and sighing, it was gonna drag on and on. "Where you from?" Rick asked, removing the headphones that had previously been resting around his neck.

"Connecticut." Rick snorted, scratching the back of his head. Tristan turned to face him,  
"What?"

"Nothing. I figured you were a trust fund baby."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He held his hands up quickly, "No offense intended. It's just that a lot of guys are here because of court order, some are here cause their family is in the military, and some are here as an alternative to boarding school." he crossed his arms, "Most of them don't make it through hell week. They call home to mommy and daddy who just ship them off to another continent so someone else can deal with them."

Tristan nodded, this guy actually seemed surprisingly likeable, "Is that so?"

"Yeah. See, I figured you were money cause for one, you don't strike me as the criminal type. Two: if your family were in the military then you would've been here way before now, and three: your shoes are a little nicer than your average petty criminal."

Tristan leaned against the wall, watching Rick look him up and down, "You don't think I'll make it here."

He shrugged, "Money. This isn't boarding school, blondie. Money doesn't mean shit here."

"No shit. And I didn't come here as an alternative for boarding school."

He looked surprised, "No?"

"No."

"So then your family's in the military?"

Tristan's laugh was light and humorless as he turned to face his roommate, "No."

"Then you're a criminal?"

"That's not it either."

Rick looked surprised, and maybe a little confused, "What, were you getting into trouble and your parents decided to send you here or something?"

Tristan looked out the window, "Not really. More of I went off on my dad and I ended up here."he looked down, trying not to think of Rory. It wouldn't do him any good.

Rick nodded as if he understood, and he let the first subject go for the moment "What's her name?"

Tristan looked back up at him, "Whose name?"

He hitched his jaw towards the blonde, "Your girl. The one you left behind."

He sat on the bed, his back against the wall, "No girl."

Rick smiled knowingly, "Yeah there is. Look, I've gone to this school for roughly five years. Now, in five years, you're probably my eighth roommate. Fifth greenie. I can tell when a guy leaves a girl behind. You've got that look."

"That look?" he asked, smirking.

"Yeah, that look. The look of missing someone. The look of having had someone. The look of loss and pain. The look of love, of leaving behind your one true love and dear god, how will you ever live without her?" he finished dramatically, smiling at himself. The sarcasm was thick in his little speech.

"And I have that look?" Tristan asked.

Rick shrugged, "Well, you have a look similar to that. So what's the story, morning glory?"

Tristan scratched the back of his head, "No story. I lost her."

"You lost her?"

"I broke it off with her."

"Why's that?"

"She doesn't need a boyfriend all the way in North Carolina."

Rick nodded, "Just thinking of her on that one, eh?"

"You don't understand. It's not like I wanted to end it."

"So why did you?"

He shook his head, "She's the reason I'm here."

Rick's eyebrows shot up, "Huh?"

"My mom hates her mother, and instead of hating them as much as she does, I wind up dating her and becoming friends with her brother. Needless to say my parents weren't thrilled. And then I shot off at my dad when he said something about her and here I am."

"So you're here because your parents don't like your girlfriend?"

"Pretty much."

"Man, that's harsh. And I thought I had it bad."

Tristan looked over at him, "What are you in here for?"

He shook his head, "I don't usually tell new roommates this, but I like you for some reason." he shrugged, "I've been here since sixth grade. But see, when I was in fifth grade my mom died and my pop didn't wanna deal with me, so he just ignored me. You know I'm just like, fine. Whatever, fuck you. I don't need this. So I start hanging out with these older guys, and before you know it they've got me as their little delivery boy. Now, keep in mind this was before I knew what coke was."

Tristan started laughing, "I can see where this is going."

Rick grinned, laughing lightly, "Shutup. But like, whatever, I thought it was sugar. So one day I'm at one of the guys' houses and I wanna make Kool-Aid-" Tristan started laughing again and Rick leaned back in his chair, "-the cops busted their house that night and took me away from my grandpa. They had no clue who my biological father was, so I went to a foster home. Then they found my dad through my mom's sister who'd known him growing up. So I go to live with him and it's all great, but get this, he's a coke head. Just my luck, right? So I start getting in trouble once I move in with him cause he just doesn't give a shit. In sixth grade I got me a car-"

Tristan cut him off, "Wait, you mean you got a car as in..."

Rick shrugged, "I'm from Atlanta. I love parking lots." Tristan laughed, but didn't say anything else. "So anyway, I get a car and the bastard reports it and gives a description of me cause apparently I wasn't as stealthy as I thought I was. And since the drug thing the year before I have a record. So they check my dad's house, find his stash, he's in the penitentiary, and it's either here or juvi for me."

Tristan nodded, wide eyed, "Wow. I can see why you wouldn't tell that to someone you'd just met."

Rick smirked, "Yeah. It's great, right?"

He laughed, "Yeah."

**CONNECTICUT**

Rory opened the door to her classroom and closed it quietly, hoping that the teacher wouldn't notice. She slid into a chair at the last lab table, next to a girl that she didn't really talk to, but knew as Rebecca. The girl smiled at Rory, and she smiled back, tucking her hair behind her ear. She was pulling her notebook out when the teacher called, "Miss Hayden, how nice of you to join us."

"Sorry, I slept in."

"Yes well, let's try to be a little more punctual from now on, yes?"

She nodded, "Yes ma'am." the teacher finished explaining what she wanted them to do, and Rory pulled out her text book, opening it up to the right page. She was half way through the section when Rebecca tapped her on the shoulder. Rory turned to look at her, "Yeah?"

"I like your necklace."

Rory touched the diamond heart lightly, "Oh, thanks."

"Where did you get it?"

She looked down at her paper, "Tristan got it for me."

The girl smiled, "You two are so adorable. I've always wished I had a guy that treated me the way Tristan treats you."

Rory turned to look at her, taken aback, "What?"

Rebecca got a far off look, grinning, "I mean, like, in the halls. He always puts his arm around you...really protective. And then at parties he doesn't go off and act like an asshole, but he stays with you. And it's weird because he's protective to where he could kill somebody, but he's not possessive enough that he freaks out if you talk to another guy. Like at David's party, I was right there when that fight started. Nathan said something about you...I can't remember exactly what. But when he did, Tristan turned around and you could just see him go into protective mode. It was really sweet. I've just always wished I had a guy like that. It was obvious when you first started here that he was crazy about you. And now, well, you can just see that he loves you" Rebecca smiled, "And you aren't so good at hiding it either."

Rory nodded, fighting back the tears that were pushing against the back of her eyes. She felt as if she'd just been punched in the stomach. "Wow."she said quietly, she swallowed the lump in her throat, "Um, I have to go to the bathroom. So I'll be right back." she slid off of the stool and onto shaking legs. She made her way slowly to the teacher's desk, "Can I use the restroom?" she asked quietly. The teacher nodded, going back to her work. Rory left the classroom, closing the door behind her quietly. She walked down the hall, and walked slowly into the bathroom,leaning against the tiled wall. Her head dropped and she inhaled deeply, closing her eyes. She crossed her arms and slid to the floor, pulling her knees to her chest as silent tears slid down her cheeks and onto the floor.

****

**_Pretty girl is suffering while he confesses everything _**

**_Pretty soon she'll figure out _**

**_You can never get 'em out of your head _**

**_It's the way _**

**_That he makes you cry _**

**_It's the way _**

**_That he's in your mind _**

**_It's the way _**

**_That he makes you fall in love_**


	17. Take Tomorrow

A/N: I'm sorry about the wait, and I don't own the song _Take Tomorrow_ by Butch Walker. 

****

**_You got lost for a while _**

**_You've been trying to find a smile _**

**_You got stood up then you fell down _**

**_And when you needed, there was no one around _**

**_You loved the previews and hate the movie _**

**_Scream at the screen 'Something move me' _**

**_Before you start to fade away_**

Paris sat across from Rory at lunch, "Okay, spill."

She looked up, "What?"

"What's up with you, and where the hell is Tristan?"

Rory tilted her head, "Why are you asking me this?"

"Because," Paris stood and walked over to the other side of the table, sitting next to her friend. "It's the first week back from winter break, so report cards will be mailed on Friday. I was one of the people picked to help with getting them out, and I was looking through the list of people who would be getting them, but Tristan's name wasn't on there. Now, I know when something is going on. Tristan has been acting weird for weeks, we come back to school, he's not here, and you're hurt. Now are you going to tell me or not?"

She sat for a moment in silence, "Well, when you put it that way..." she said sarcastically.

"I'm serious. What the hell is going on?" Rory just shook her head, looking down at her hands, and Paris's voice softened, "Rory, come on." She looked back up at her, her eyes glistening with tears. Paris put a hand to her chest, "Oh my God, he's okay, isn't he?"

She shrugged, "As far as I know."

"Oh." her hand fell and her voice lost it's soft quality, "Then what is it?"

Rory didn't look at her, "I don't know."

"What? You were just crying and you don't know why?"

"He left."

Paris looked utterly confused, "What do you mean, he left?"

"I mean he's gone. He broke up with me. He's in military school in North Carolina."

Paris's eyes were wide, "What? Why?"

"I just told you I don't know."

Her head cocked back, "Did you just say that he broke up with you?"

Rory bit her bottom lip, "Yeah."

She looked as if she'd just been told the earth stopped rotating, "You're kidding, right? I mean, Tristan didn't break up with you, did he?"

Rory sniffed lightly, turning to face Paris sharply, "Do I look like I'm kidding?"

Her eyes were still wide, and she shook her head, "He's gone?" she asked quietly.

Rory nodded, looking down at her hands, "Yes. He's gone."

Paris looked down, "He never even said goodbye." she whispered.

"He didn't tell me until three hours before he left. But he wouldn't tell me why he was sent there." she said quietly before standing quickly and leaving the cafeteria. Paris watched her go, swallowing the lump in her throat. Tristan was gone.

**NEXT WEEK**

Rory sat in her second class, watching the teacher with glazed over eyes when the door opened. She looked up with the rest of the class and was surprised when a tall boy that she'd never seen before waltz in. She looked down at her paper, rolling her eyes. He was so over confident. He handed the teacher his slip of paper, and she slipped her glasses down her nose slightly, "Mr. Hart, is it?"

He smirked lightly, "Yes ma'am, it is."

"How nice. Please take a seat." He raised his gaze to the class, whom for the most part were glancing between him and their work. Of course, Rory wouldn't know that, considering she wasn't paying any attention to him. And so, he walked over and placed himself in the seat next to her. A few of the girls rolled their eyes in disappointment, muttering under their breath about how Rory always seemed to get the best guys, while others raised their eyebrows, wondering what was going to come out of this. By now everyone knew that Tristan was gone, but no one knew why. They were all walking on eggshells around her and she was tired of it.

She glanced over at him, and he smiled cockily, "Hey, I'm Adam."

She nodded, looking back at her paper, "Rory."

He watched her, his head tilted, "How long have you gone to Chilton?"

She didn't look up at him, "This is my first year."

"Really?"

She was trying to ignore him, but he didn't seem to get the point, "Yep."

They were in silence for a little while, the only sound was pencils scratching on paper, "You like it here?" he whispered, leaning closer

She still didn't spare him a glance, "Not at the moment."

"Where did you go before?"

"Stars Hollow High."

He nodded, "Did you like it there?"

Rory turned to look at him sharply, "Do you have a fear of silence or something?"

He grinned at having gotten her to look up at him, "At the moment? Maybe."

She rolled her eyes, a disgusted look in her face as she turned back to her paper. "Don't talk to me."

"You're in a good mood." She ignored him, focusing on her work. Why wouldn't he leave her alone? Did she just attract jerks? He was still staring at her and she knew it.

Adam watched her work, he'd annoyed her, and thought it was immensely funny. She intrigued him. And really didn't like him. He'd only known her for ten minutes and she'd flat out told him to leave her alone. That was new. He grinned as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She could be fun. There was something about her...he couldn't place it. It wasn't purity, but it might have been a slight innocence. She looked unhappy, and considering he'd just walked in, it was obvious. He glanced around him and noticed a guy sitting behind Rory glaring at him. Was that the boyfriend or something? The guy said something to Rory quietly and he heard her call him Baker. Maybe he wasn't her boyfriend, they didn't act like it, at least. The door opened again and a blonde girl walked in, looking at Rory and Baker, widening her eyes in silent communication. The two who were sitting smiled. The girl handed a slip of paper to the teacher, who nodded. She started to make her way over to them, but stopped when she saw him, looking him up and down uncertainly.

She slid into the seat behind him and gave Baker a questioning look. He leaned over and whispered something to her. Now, they acted like they were going out. The blonde looked at Rory who just shook her head, her jaw muscled tightened. And he knew they were silently discussing him. He leaned back in his chair, grinning. Oh yes, this girl could definitely be fun.

**TWO WEEKS LATER, LUNCH**

Rory walked in and sat between Baker and Madeline, and to her dismay they were talking about Adam. He'd been in three of her classes. Most people seemed to like him, and she admitted that he was kind of likeable, even if he did annoy her. But every time she saw him, she was reminded of Tristan...it was weird. He had curly black hair, whereas Tristan's had been messy, but straight, and blonde. He was kind of leery where Tristan had been more playful. He made serious innuendos, whereas she always knew that Tristan had been joking. He had a certain something about him that she didn't like, but she did have to admit that there was something about him she might be able to learn to like. At least, her friends all liked him, even in Baker and Louise didn't at first.

Their conversation was interrupted and she was pulled from her musings when two people entered and sat at their table. One was Paris, and the other was...Adam. She sighed, and then groaned. He looked over at her and grinned, "Rory, lovely to see you."

She wrinkled her nose, "Mmm." so he was sitting with them now?

"Aren't you happy to see me?"

"Thrilled."

He was across from her, and he tapped her foot lightly with his. She jerked her shoe away,  
narrowing her eyes in his direction. He just smirked at her. Okay maybe he wasn't as likeable as she was making him out to be. They were only there for a few minutes when the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. Everyone got up to leave, and they made their way to their lockers. Rory grabbed her books out of her locker and turned to walk to class, but Adam touched her arm, holding her back. "Hey, can I talk to you, Rory?"

She turned to look at him, "What?" He scratched the back of his head and she sighed impatiently, "Adam, we're about to be late for class. Can't this wait?"

Adam watched her, his gaze unwavering. In the past two weeks he'd watched her, and she wasn't a very happy person. She had beautiful eyes, but they were empty. She moved as if she were in a trance, mechanically and routine. It was almost like she didn't feel. In two weeks she'd never laughed, and rarely smiled. Just stared into space and worked. There was something about her that begged to be opened. She needed something to move her, he just didn't know what. He looked around to make sure that everyone was on their way to class and no one was paying any attention to them. He shoved his hands into his pockets, "So, how're you doing?"

She shook her head, unsure of what he was doing, "I'm fine. Why do you ask?"

He shrugged, "Just wondering."

Rory nodded and they stood in silence for a moment, "Is that it?"

Adam nodded, "Yeah. Pretty much."

"Okay." she said slowly, turning in the direction of their class and walking a few feet.

He jogged up to her, walking beside her, "So what's the story?"

She shook her head, confused, "What story?"

"The guy. Everybody talks about him. Tristan. You dated him. What happened?"

Rory froze, her face unreadable, "Who said anything about him?"'

Adam shrugged, "Everyone. They all say he hurt you."

Rory bit her bottom lip, shaking her head, "Don't ask me about him."

He put his hands up, "What the hell did he do, Rory?"

She inhaled deeply, "Adam, he left less than a month ago. If you really want to know what happened then ask Paris or Blake, but I can't talk about it." she turned to leave, but he grabbed her wrist.

"Rory, come on."

She turned to face him, her anger detectible in her voice, "Adam, seriously, don't fucking mention him right now. It would be such a waste if your pretty life ended in the halls of Chilton this afternoon."

He pulled his hand away from her, "Sorry. Obviously he did hurt you."

She turned away, "I'm not talking to you about him."

Adam was silent for a moment as the bell rang. "I just want to know what kind or guy would hurt someone like you."

And her anger was back in full force as she twirled on her heel to face him, "Don't fucking talk about him like that. You never even knew him. Hell, you don't know me, so don't try to hit on me like you are-" he stepped back from her, "Tristan screwed up, yes, but it wasn't his fault. And you cannot stand there and talk about him like that. He didn't mean to hurt me. And everybody walking on eggshells and talking about how sad it is that this happened, aren't making it any better. But at least they knew him. You didn't Adam, and just because Tristan and I have broken up does not mean that I'll let you say anything about him. Ever." she finished, and he was wide eyed, leaning away from her. She hadn't really been yelling, but it was powerfully delivered.

"Wow." She shook her head, walking quickly down the hall. Adam had to run to catch up, "Where are you going?"

"To get a pass. We're late."

He watched her as she strode down the corridor, refusing to look at him. That guy must have really hurt her. He wanted Rory, and everyone but her knew it. But all he'd heard was, 'Be careful with that one. She's damaged.' Everyone talked about the wild Tristan who'd moved away over the break. And their descriptions of him were never without a mention of the beautiful Lorelai Leigh Hayden...either of how she'd changed him or of how they were so adorable...or of how he'd hurt her so much when he left. He'd met her before he heard of Tristan, and it was just his luck that the girl he was set on, was the one who'd just been hurt. It was his luck that her last relationship was the topic of the year in Chilton gossip. Lucky him, that he had to like the girl that was damaged.

_**You just stare into space **_

_**You found love, but it got erased **_

_**You're on the road with all the stop lights **_

_**And you're too afraid to turn the wrong from right **_

_**You ate your soul and it made you fat **_

_**Starve yourself from everything else **_

_**That makes you completely full**_


	18. Best of You

A/n: I don't own _Best of You_ by Foo Fighters. Sorry I haven't been upating, my life's been crazy.

_A/N 2: Okay, if you haven't read in a while, I'll summarize. Rory has a twin named Blake and a 13 year old brother named Shane. Lorelia and Chris are married and the twins started Chilton their sophomore year due to their grandparents' request. Rory was with Dean, butshe broke up with him because he was drunk and being a jerk to her. She and Tristan were together, but hismother hatedher parents and wanted them to break up. Tristan wouldn't so he was sent to military school. He was Rory's first. And after Tristan left, a new guy named Adam came to Chilton and is friends with the little 'group'. He likes Rory and asked her about Tristan, but she didn't want to talk about him, and when Adam bad-mouthed him, Rory defended him. She still doesn't know why Tristan went to military school, but he broke up with her before he left. They're still sophomores._

_The group is: Rory, Blake, Jess, Lane, Paris, Louise, Madeline, Henry, my invention of Baker, and Tristan. But when Adam came he started hanging out with them._

--------------------------------

_**Are you gone and onto someone new? **_

_**I needed somewhere to hang my head **_

_**Without your noose **_

_**You gave me something that I didn't have **_

_**But had no use **_

_**I was too weak to give in **_

_**Too strong to lose**_

Rory grabbed her Lit book from her locker, rolling her neck to relieve the tension in it. She glanced to her right and jumped to see Adam right next to her, leaning against the locker by hers. She took a deep breath, resting her palm on her chest, "Jesus, Adam. Make a noise or something next time."

He grinned, "Hey Rory."

She closed her locker, "Hey."

Rory started to make her way down the hall and Adam followed, taking her bag and slinging it across his own shoulder. Since their fight last month, he'd apologized and she just told him not to mention it. Now, they never said anything about Tristan to each other and Adam was the perfect gentleman, most of the time.

"So Rory." he said, looking forward.

She glanced over at him, "Yeah?"

"The Valentines dance is on Saturday."

"Yeah, I know." they walked into their class and sat down in the front.

"You going?" he set her bag next to her chair.

She pulled out a pen and notebook without looking at him, "Wasn't planning on it."

"Hmm." he pulled out his own things for the class, "Well I think you should."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"How very thoughtful of you."

"I think so." he opened his notebook to a blank page before looking at her, "You know what else I think?"

She looked over at him, "What's that?"

"I think you should go with me." he said, smiling lightly.

Rory was silent, her blinking eyes the only part of her that was moving. "What?"

His smile faltered, "Go. Even if it's just as friends, you need to get out."

She shook her head, "I don't want to get out."

"Rory." he said, trying to reason.

"Adam."she said back.

"Come on. One night."

She looked down, "I-"

"Rory, come on." The bell rang signaling class to start and she opened her mouth, but closed it again. Adam gave her a meaningful look and she closed her eyes as the teacher stood up. "Rory."

She looked over at him, "Okay. I'll go."

He leaned back in his chair, smiling, "I'll pick you up at seven."

Rory sat at the lunch table, looking through her notebook when Paris slid in next to her, "Hey."

She didn't look up, "Hey."

Paris looked at her friend, her eyebrows drawing together, "You okay?"

"I'm fine. Why?"

She shook her head, "You look kind of..." she trailed off, "I'm not sure. Weird."

"Gee, thanks."

Paris laughed, "No, I mean, just kind of confused."

Rory turned to face her, "Are you and Jess going to the dance?"

"Yeah..." she said slowly, tilting her head, "why?"

"Today Adam asked me to go with him," Paris's eyes widened, "And I kind of accepted."

Her jaw dropped, "You did?"

Rory looked down, "Is that bad?"

"No." she assured her quickly, "No. There's nothing wrong with that."

Madeline, Baker, and Blake made their way in and sat at the table as well. Rory looked up to see her brother watching her, concerned, "You okay, Ror?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." she stood up, "But I have to finish my history homework, so I'm gonna go to the library." they all gave their goodbyes and she left.

Baker looked around at the other three at the table, "Is it just me or has she been acting really weird lately?"

Madeline was still watching the door her friend had exited from, "It's not just you."

Paris glanced at Blake, who was still looking at the door as well. He looked over at her and sighed, shaking his head. She stood as Louise, Adam, and Henry entered and made their way to the table. She glanced at the dark haired boy and shook her head, walking from the room. Adam looked around the table, "What was that all about?"

The first three looked at each other, Madeline and Baker shrugged, and Blake shook his head. There were only four other people that would know what had just been wrong with Rory, only four other people that could read her the way he could. Jess and Lane were in Stars Hollow, Paris was no longer in the cafeteria, and Tristan was in North Carolina. If any of them had been there, he could have glanced at them, silent communication would have passed, and he wouldn't feel like none of their friends knew his sister. Because they did. Louise, Madeline, Baker, and Henry loved Rory to death, he knew that. But they just didn't know her the way Paris or Tristan did. He looked over at Adam, who was in awe of Rory. It made him sick to his stomach. He liked the guy and all, it was just, to Blake, Rory and Tristan were still...well, Rory and Tristan. Adam didn't fit there. Paris pulled her phone out of her bag and push number three on speed dial as she made her way out of the building. She leaned against the stone side of the building as someone on the other line picked up. "Hello?"

"Tristan?"

He sounded surprised, but happy, "Paris?"

She sighed, "Hey."

"Hey." someone on the other line said something to Tristan and she heard his mumble something to them.

"Aww, have you made friends, Tristan?"

"Are you saying that you didn't think I would?" he asked, mocking hurt.

"Of course not." she smiled, looking over the grounds of Chilton, "So, how are you holding up?"

Tristan snorted, "Would the phrase, 'stricter than Charleston, more OCD than Mrs. Giddens, and more work than Coach Higgins's gym class' mean anything to you?"

Paris's eyes widened, "How _are_ you holding up?"

He laughed, "It's okay once you get the hang of it."

She smiled, "So, who all have you talked to since you left?"

"Everybody." he was silent for a moment, "Except for Rory."

Paris inhaled slowly. Damnit, "Oh."

"I mean, Lane even called me a few weeks ago to see how I was doing. But I haven't heard anything from Rory-" he was quiet, "-and I can't call her."

Paris swallowed the lump in her throat, "Actually, she was part of the reason I called."

"Oh?" she heard him say something muffled to someone on the other line and a few male voices replied. Then there was the sound of a chair scraping the linoleum floor and the sounds of the cafeteria faded from his background, "Is she okay?"

"In what sense?"

"Paris." he said slowly, and she knew that mean not to beat around the bush.

She sighed, "Tristan, did anyone ever mention Adam to you?"

He was silent for a moment, "A few people mentioned him. Why?"

"What did they say about him?" she asked, placing the bottom of her shoe flat against the stone wall.

"Nothing really. Blake just said that there was a new guy."

Paris exhaled slowly, "That's all anyone's told you?"

"Should they have told me more?"

"Yeah."

Tristan was silent for a beat, "What do you mean?"

"Are you sitting down?" she asked.

"Paris." his tone of voice told her that he didn't think she was being very funny.

She took a deep breath, "Okay, he's pretty much in our little group now. He sits with us at lunch,  
sits with us in class and hangs out with us on the weekends." she paused, waiting for him to say something.

"So pretty much he replaced me?" Tristan asked, his voice sounding tired.

Paris's eyes widened in horror, "No!" she said quickly. "Tristan, how can you even say that? Without you there would be no group. If you hadn't befriended Blake and Rory then none of this would have happened. We wouldn't be friends with them. And the rest of us have known you forever. How can you even say that?"

"Well if he isn't replacing me then what is it?"

"It's just a new guy that came to our school. He's pretty cool and we decided to make nice. That's all."she stopped, waiting for Tristan to say something, but he didn't, so she went on,  
"Look, Tristan," she rested her forehead in her palm, "after I tell you this, you're really going to feel like he replaced you, but he didn't. I swear to god he didn't Tristan. You have to believe me." she was quiet, waiting for him to reply.

When it became clear that she wasn't going to go on until he said something, Tristan looked down at his shoes, "Okay?" he said uncertainly, but it was obviously enough for Paris, considering she started talking again.

"He only moved here a little over a month ago, but since then he's been chasing Rory. She usually ignored him, but he's persistent." she stopped, closing her eyes, "Tristan, he asked her to the Valentine's dance. She's going with him." she fell silent, waiting until the boy on the other line said something. He didn't. "Tristan?" she said quietly.

"She's not my girlfriend anymore." there was no emotion in his voice.

"Oh no. Don't you dare do this, Tristan Dugrey. Don't pull this society card on me."

"What the hell do you want me to say Paris? I can't go up and kick his ass or anything. I can't stop it. What do you want me to do?"

She looked down, "I just thought you might want to know-"

"No. I mean, I'm glad you told me. I just...this is...ironic." he said the last part quietly.

"What?" Paris's eyebrows drew together in confusion.

He laughed lightly, but it was humorless, "I never told you why I was sent here, did I?"

"No." she said slowly.

Tristan shook his head, "If I wasn't so fucking mad at myself, then this just might be kind of funny-"

She cut him off, "Tristan, what the hell are you talking about?"

But he ignored her, "-I mean seriously, what the hell is this? A fucking teen movie?-"

"Tristan, stop!"

"-I can't believe I seriously got shipped off to military school for this shit-"

"Tristan!" she yelled, and that time she got his attention.

"She's the reason I'm here!" he screamed at her, and she stood still, her eyes wide.

"What?" she whispered, not quite sure that she'd heard right.

He groaned, clutching his hair in between his fingers, "I got shipped off to this god forsaken hell hole because of Miss Lorelai Leigh Hayden. It's because of her that I'm in North fucking Carolina."

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, confused by his babbling.

He stopped and inhaled deeply, "My parents hate her."

"I know."

"They wanted me to break up with her."

Paris's eyes widened as recognition dawned on her, "Tristan, you didn't." she shook her head, he didn't get shipped down the east coast just because he wouldn't break up with Rory, surely he wouldn't give up everything he knew just because of that? He couldn't even be with her when they were that far apart. Well, at least it explained why he couldn't tell Rory why he was leaving.

"I love her."

"I know."

He looked down at his hand and his voice was shaky, "Paris, I can't be there and not be with her. I can't be around her everyday and not be able to touch her."

She bit her lip, "I know."

He was quiet for a beat, and his voice hardened, "You know what? I don't fucking care. She can go. It's not like I can stop her anyway-"

"Tristan." she said quietly, cutting him off.

He was silent for a moment, "I'm fine."

"No you're not."

"No, I really am." he looked up towards the sky, "I have to be."

She closed her eyes, "I'm really sorry."

He shrugged, "Thanks for calling."

"Yeah." they were silent for a moment, "Tristan?"

"Yeah?"

"Why didn't you ever tell Rory why you left? She's really confused."

"What good would it have done if I told her why I was leaving?"

Paris looked down, "I don't know. She's just- she thinks she did something to make you want to break up with her. She doesn't know why you broke up with her. In her mind you two could have made it work."

Tristan shook his head, "Paris, do you know what I would give to have made it work? I wish it would have worked out. I really do. But there's nothing I can do about it."

There was a shrill ringing throughout the campus, and Paris looked around as students fled the grounds, "That's the bell. I have to go."

Tristan shoved his free hand into his pocket, "Thanks."

She smiled lightly, "I figured you'd want to know."

"Bye Paris."

"Bye Tristan." she closed her phone and slid it into her bag.

"Hey."

She turned and saw Rory standing next to her, "Oh hey."

Her friend tilted her head as Paris just stood still, "You ready to go to class?"

"Oh!" she shook her head, "Yeah. Let's go."

_**SATURDAY, DANCE**_

Rory leaned against the wall, drumming her fingers on her cup of punch as Adam and Baker talked. Louise was dancing with Henry and Lane was talking to Jess and Paris on the other side of the room. A slow song came over the speakers and Adam touched her arm, "You want to dance"  
She pushed off of the wall, "Sure." she set her cup down and they passed Louise on her way back over to Baker. Adam led her to the middle of the dance floor and rested his right hand on her hip, taking her right hand in his left. She rested her left hand on his shoulder and looked around the room as they moved slowly back and forth to the music. She looked back up at him and realized that he was watching her. She cocked her head back, "What?"

He shook his head, "Nothing."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

"Okay." she said slowly, looking around again.

"Are you having fun?" Adam asked, spinning her out and then back in.

She slid her hand back onto his shoulder, "You know, I really am." and she was. It was nice to just be around her friends.

He nodded, thinking, "Rory?"

She looked up at him, "Yeah?"

"I like you." he said, looking straight at her.

Her eyes widened, "What?"

"I like you." he repeated.

She shook her head, "You don't even really know me."

"I've known you for a month. I 've been hanging out with you for a month. I'm not saying that I'm in love with you or anything, I just want a date." he said, shrugged nonchalantly, although she could feel his palm sweating. And maybe that was what made her think about it. The fact that he was nervous, but still trying not to show it.

But then she thought about it and looked down shaking her head, "Adam, you're a great friend. I mean, you make me laugh, I love talking to you, and you always try to cheer me up when I'm upset." she looked up at him and saw that he was smiling charmingly, "But I'm not sure if I'm ready to be with someone." his face fell.

He shook his head, "Rory, I'm not asking you to marry me. Just dinner and a movie." she looked down, and before she could say anything he spoke again, "Come on. No pressure." he smiled,  
"Besides, like you said, I make you laugh, so even if I make a complete ass of myself, you'll still have had a good time."

She sighed, looking up with a small smile, "Alright. You've got yourself a date." he grinned and opened his mouth to say something, but she cut him off, "One date, and we'll see how it goes."

He nodded, a huge smile on his face, "I can work with that."

She smiled as well, pushing back the lump in her throat, "Good."

_**AFTER THE DANCE, GELLAR'S**_

Rory sat on Paris's bed, watching her friend walk around the room in search of her brush, "This new maid is driving me crazy. She moves everything! My brush was on the freaking vanity and she moved it to God knows where." the blonde mumbled, getting down on her stomach and pushing the bed skirt out of the way so that she could look under the bed.

Rory tilted her head to the side, "Why would it be under the bed?"

"It's the only damn place I haven't looked." she growled, and Rory laid back, smiling and shaking her head, "Dear God, I swear she's insane." Paris said as she stood up, the brush in her hand. Rory laughed, her head falling back. "Shut up." she snapped as she sat at the vanity,  
shaking her head

Rory was still grinning, "Did you have fun at the dance?"

"Yeah, actually. It was a lot of fun." she looked up at her friend in the mirror, "What about you? How was it with Adam?"

She nodded, "It was fun." she looked down at her hands, "He asked me out on a date."

Paris swirled around to stare at her, "He did? What did you say?"

"Well at first I said no and then he kind of convinced me."

"So you said yes?"

Rory bit her lip, "Kind of."

Paris exhaled slowly, "You're going on a date with him?"

"Yeah." she said quietly, looking down.

Paris closed her eyes, rubbing her forehead, "Wow."

"Yeah." they sat in silence for a moment, Rory looking down at her hands, "Paris?"

"Hmm?"

She bit her lip, "Uh, there's something I need to tell you."

Her friend sat on the bed beside her, obviously worried, "Is something wrong?"

Rory looked over at her before standing up, "No. I'm fine...it's just..." she trailed off, glancing around the room, and her gaze fell on a picture of her, Tristan, Jess, and Paris. She closed her eyes, "Louise is the only one who knows, and that's just because she was with me when I got it..." she fell silent, looking down.

"Rory?" Paris said quietly, walking over to her, "Are you okay?"

She shook her head, "No."

"What happened?"

Rory inhaled deeply, "There's something that I never told you."

"What's that?"

"Um, right now Blake and Louise are the only ones who know-"

Paris interrupted her, Know what?"

Rory blinked, looking up at her friend, "I had sex with Tristan." she said quietly.

Paris was still for a moment, but then her eyes widened, "You what? When did this happen?"

She bit her lip, shaking her head, "The first time was after the party you guys threw for our birthday."

"The first time? How many times did it happen?" she asked, obviously still shocked.

"Not a lot. Three or four times."

"Wow." she whispered, blinking slowly, "I didn't see that one coming."

"You didn't?"

"I had no idea. How do Louise and Blake know?"

She sat on the bed, "Louise went to the doctor with me-"

Paris cut her off, "The doctor? You're on the pill?" she sat next to her.

"Yeah." she looked down, "I mean, I knew he was going to be my first, so I figured better safe than sorry."

"I can't believe you didn't tell me. That was over a month ago."

"Yeah, I know. We didn't tell anyone."

"How does Blake know?"

Rory shrugged, "One morning he came into my room and said something about it."

Paris nodded, digesting the information, "That's so weird to me."

"Why?"

"It's just, I didn't think you two were going to sleep together-I mean, I thought you might, just not for a while."

Rory nodded, leaning back on the bed, "I just wanted you to know."

"Lane doesn't know?"

"I haven't told her yet."

Paris laid down as well. That had to have just made it harder for Rory when Tristan moved away. They sat in silence for a while, until Paris asked quietly, "When will you be okay?"

Rory didn't tear her gaze from the ceiling, "I don't know. Soon, I hope."

Paris nodded, staring up as well. "I do too." and they sat in a comfortable silence, her radio the only sound in the room apart from their breathing.

_**Has someone taken your faith?**_

_**It's real, the pain you feel **_

_**The life, the love **_

_**You die to heal **_

_**The broken hearts **_

_**You trust, you must confess **_

_**Is someone getting the best **_

_**The best, the best **_

_**The best of you?**_


	19. I've Got A Dark Alley

**A/N: Okay, this chapter's all over the place, I know. This one was hard for me to write, i don't know why. And I know it's not one of my best, but the next one should be better. I don't own _'I've Got A Dark Alley And A Bad Idea That Says You Should Shut Your Mouth'_ by Fallout Boy**

_**Please put the doctor on the phone **_

_**Cause I'm not making any sense **_

_**Blame everyone but me for this mess **_

_**And my back has been breaking from this heavy heart **_

_**We never seemed so far**_

Lane sat on Rory's bed, staring at her in shock, "Wait, so you and Tristan..." she trailed off meaningfully.

Rory smiled at her weakly, "Yep."

"So he was your first?"

"Yes."

"And how many times did this happen?"

Rory thought for a moment, "Four."

Lane's eyes became even wider, if that was possible, "When?"

"The first time was after the birthday party you guys threw for me and Blake. The second was after the party in the town, the third was the night after that, and the fourth was new years."

She shook her head, "Wow. I mean, I knew that you'd spent the night at his house, but I didn't think you'd slept with him."

Rory nodded, looking out the window as she nodded slowly, "I did." Lane sat in silence staring out the window as well. "What about you and Henry?" she asked suddenly.

She turned sharply, "No." she looked back out the window, "Not yet, anyways."

"But you think you will?" Rory asked.

Lane nodded, "Yeah, I think we will."

Rory sighed quietly, "Wow."

"Yeah." they sat in silence again, the radio playing, "Hey, Rory?"

"Hmm?" she turned to look at Lane, who was still looking outside.

"Are you okay?"

Rory thought for a moment, one corner of her lips turning up slightly, "You know, I really am."

"You are?"

"Yeah. I am."

_**ONE WEEK LATER**_

Rory, Louise, Paris, and Lane were all on Madeline's oversized bed, staring at the ceiling as the clock on the wall ticked away seconds of the early morning. Rory turned her head and saw that it was 3 o'clock, and she turned back to look at the shadows cast across the ceiling by the glow of the moonlight.

When she'd come over earlier, Rory had told Madeline about her and Tristan, since she was the only one who didn't know.

They were all silent now, their breathing the only noise apart from the soft hum of the stereo. "So you're with Adam now?" Louise asked out of nowhere.

"Yeah." Rory answered quietly.

"Like, officially with him. He asked you to be his girlfriend and everything?" Madeline said.

"Yeah. After our date two weeks ago. We're officially a couple."

They fell into silence, the other four girls digesting this information. "You make a cute couple"  
Lane said quietly, and Madeline made a small noise, seconding the opinion. Paris and Louise were silent, but the latter nodded slowly. Paris, however, didn't move. She simply sighed,  
closing her eyes.

Rory stirred, her eyes opening reluctantly. She glanced over at the clock and saw that it was only 4 o'clock. She'd just dozed off for a little, but upon a quick look around the bed, she saw that the other four girls were still out cold. Her eyes were drawn to Maddy's window-seat, and she stood up, making her way slowly towards it. She was only sitting for a few minutes when she heard the covers rustle and saw Paris slide out of the bed. Her friend looked up and made her way slowly over to the brunette in the window. Rory shifted her feet so that Paris could sit, and they rested in a comfortable silence, both looking out at the dark sky.

"I'm sorry." she said quietly.

Rory looked up, watching her friend's outline against the night, "For what?"

The blonde looked up, biting her lip, "I really am happy that you like Adam and you two are together. I know that I never show it, but I really am."

"Thanks." she whispered, looking up at her, "I know it's hard...with Tristan gone now. You two were best friends your entire lives."

Paris smiled lightly, shaking her head, "Rory, honestly, you're the best friend I've ever had. Tristan is the best guy friend, but I mean, you being happy is important. I don't want you to feel like you can't talk to me about you and Adam, because you can. And I hope you know that."

Rory inhaled deeply, smiling. "Thanks Paris. I really do need that. And I know you don't like Adam. I'm sorry about that."

She shook her head, "It's not that I don't like him. I just can't figure him out, and I don't like it. He confuses me and it bothers me-" she laughed lightly, "-I guess it's just that I don't know him." Rory smiled, and Paris could tell that she was relieved. She looked down forcing a smile,  
"Okay." and her face rose until she was looking at Rory, "So tell me about your last date with Adam."

_**TWO DAYS LATER**_

"They what?" Tristan asked, holding his phone to his ear.

"They're together. They have been for a couple weeks." Baker said quietly.

"So she's with Adam?"

"Yeah." when Tristan said nothing, he spoke again, "I'm sorry, man."

Tristan ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head, "Thanks for calling man, but I have to go"  
he didn't wait for his friend to say anything before he closed the phone.

"Is there a problem?" Rick asked, looking up at Tristan. Kyle and Stewart, two of the guys in their grade, were lounging around the room. He shook his head, unable to form a sentence. Rick glanced at the other two boys, who shrugged and stood before walking out. Tristan just looked out the window, his eyes blank. "Okay, come tell doctor Rick what's ailing you." Tristan didn't move, so his friend stood, walking over to him, "Hey man, you alright?"

He looked over at him, shaking his head, "She moved on."

Rick's eyes widened, "Your girl? I'm surprised."

"Yeah. Me too. I didn't think she'd get over it that fast."

He shrugged, "How do you know she's moved on?"

"She has another guy."

His head cocked back, "Already?"

"Yeah."

Rick shook his head, "Women like that piss me off." Tristan just nodded, looking back out the window. "You know what you need?"

"What's that?" Tristan asked, looking over at him.

"A drink. It's the weekend, so the guys that have been here for a while have leave. I'll get you something. A present. It'll be a sign of my love, and I'll just leave and be back in an hour. Hell,  
I'll even bring Kyle and Stewart along. They're not the heaviest drinkers, but they're funny as fuck once you get them a little intoxicated." Tristan looked over at him to see a small grin on his face, "Come on, what'll it be?"

He nodded slowly, "I guess I could use a drink."

"Ha ha. Yes. I'll be back in and hour." and he grabbed his wallet before making his way out of the room.

_**THREE WEEKS LATER**_

Rory sat on Lane's floor, her jaw dropped and her eyes wide as her best friend spoke in an exited,  
hushed voice, "And then after dinner he took me to his house and no one was home." she smiled,  
sighing, "we were making out and it just kind of...happened."

Rory shook her head, "I just...I'm in shock." she said quietly. "I mean, how was it? Did it hurt?"

Lane shook her head, "Not really. I mean, yeah, I'm sore. But it really wasn't that bad."

"And how do you feel? Regret it?"

"No. Which surprises me so much. I mean, I would've thought that I'd feel horrible, but I don't." she smiled, "I am really so in love with him, Rory."

Her friend grinned, "I know you are." Rory opened her mouth to say something else, but she was cut off by her phone ringing. She looked down at her bag and pulled it out, "Sorry." she said quietly, but Lane just shook her head, waving her hand. Rory smiled apologetically and flipped open the phone, "Hello?"

"Rory, you need to come home."

Her eyebrows drew together in confusion, "Mom?"

"Yes. And you need to leave Lane's now."

"I don't understand-"

Her mother cut her off, "I need to talk to you. I'm not kidding, Rory. Come home right now. You better be walking out of the door this instant."

"But-"

"Now, Rory!" she practically yelled.

Rory inhaled sharply, her mother had never yelled at her before, "Okay." her voice was small as she hung up the phone and looked at Lane, who was wide eyed. "I have to go." she said quietly.

Her friend nodded, "Who was that?'

"My mom."

Lane's eyes grew wider, but she leaned forward and gave Rory a hug, "Okay. Call me once whatever this is blows over."

She nodded, "I will." and she opened the bedroom door, making her way downstairs before exiting the old house. Ten minutes later she was entering her own home. "Mom!" she called,  
and there was a reply from upstairs. Her eyes narrowed as she made her way slowly through the house, "Marco?" she called, but when her mother didn't reply to the game with 'Polo', she knew something was definitely wrong. "Mom?"

"In here." the reply had come from her own room, and when she pushed the door open, her mother was sitting on the bed, looking upset. As soon as she entered, she was questioned, "Are you having sex with Adam?"

Rory's eyes widened, "What?"

"Are you sleeping with him?"

"What? No I'm not sleeping with him."

"Don't lie to me, Rory." she warned.

"I'm not. And no, mom, I am not sleeping with him. What in the world gave you that idea?"

"Then why are you hiding this in your room?" she asked, holding up a package of birth control.

Rory felt her heart stop. She shook her head, "I just-"

"Why, Rory?"

"Just in case. But I'm not having sex with Adam."

"So then was it Tristan?"

"What?"

"Rory, come on, babe. Did you have sex with Tristan?"

She shook her head, "I-" but she couldn't lie to her mother. Never had been able to.

Lorelai closed her eyes, shaking her head, "Tell me he didn't force you."

Rory was silent for a moment, "What?"

Her mother's eyes opened, "Ror? He didn't force you, did he?" she stood up and touched her daughter's arm lightly, but Rory jerked away.

"Don't touch me."

Lorelai pulled her hand away, shocked, "What?"

"Tristan didn't-Tristan would never force me into anything." her mother's words were making her so mad that she was stuttering.

"I don't know that."

"Well you should!" she yelled, stepping away.

Lorelai shook her head, "How many times did you sleep with him?" Rory turned away,  
shrugging. "Rory." she said sternly, catching her arm and bringing her around to face her.

"I don't know."

"Yes you do."

She jerked away, "Stop. I don't want to talk to you."

"Rory."

"No." she started to make her way to the door, but her mother grabbed her arm.

"So then all those times you said you were spending the night with Louise or Paris..." she trailed off, and Rory spun around.

"What? What about those times, mom?"

"You were with Tristan."

She shook her head, "No. I was with Louise and Paris when I said I was going to be with them."

Lorelai gave her a look that clearly said she didn't believe her. "So then when did this happen? The drive home from school? At a party? When did you have the time to have sex with him while you were at someone else's house?"

She shook her head, making her way back to the door, "I'm not talking to you about this."

"Why, Rory? Why, after everything we've talked about, what would posses you to throw it away for someone like him?"

Rory spun on her heel, "Stop it! I can't take this! I was fine with him being gone, and now suddenly you're bringing it up again. I do not want to hear it! You were having sex at my age,  
hell, me and Blake are living proof of that-"

"You can't bring this into that, Rory."

She shook her head, "I don't want to talk to you, mom."

"So you're not having sex with Adam?"

"No, I am not having sex with Adam." she turned to leave, and her mother started to say something to her, but she ignored her and kept walking.

_**TWO HOURS LATER**_

Rory was at Baker's fuming as she kicked random trees in his back yard as he walked after her,  
his eyebrows drawn together in confusion and worry. "You okay?" he asked, following her around the property.

She turned on him, shaking her head in anger, "I am...so pissed off right now. I can't even...talk." she turned back around. She couldn't go to and of the girls' houses, because she didn't want to talk to a girl. She couldn't talk to Jess because she'd known him forever...she couldn't talk to Blake because he was her brother...Henry was with Lane, and Adam was out of the question.

He grabbed her shoulders, stilling her, "Ror, breathe." she inhaled, "And out." she exhaled slowly. "Now what's going on?"

She shook her head, "I can't. I'm just so mad at my mom."

"Why?"

She sighed, dropping her head, "I don't know. I just..." she looked up at him, swallowing the lump in her throat, "I hate who I am lately."

"What the hell happened?"

She shook her head, "I don't know. I just got into a fight with my mom." she closed her eyes,  
looking down, "I just-" but she was cut off as her cell phone rang. She picked it up and glanced at Baker apologetically, "Sorry." she flipped it open, "Hello?" she was silent, but her mouth opened slightly, "Blake, you're not making any sense. She what?" the girl fell silent again, her eyes widening in horror, "No. What? When?" her head was shaking back and forth lightly. "Yes, I'll be there." she snapped the phone shut, her eyes wide, and she swayed. She looked slowly over at Baker and he tilted his head.

"Ror, you okay? What happened?"

She shook her head, her eyelids fluttering, "It's my mom." she said quietly.

"What about her?"

"She-she was in an accident." she was talking quietly, as if speaking about something awful that had happened to someone she didn't know.

"Well is she okay?"

She looked up at him, not really seeing anything, "She's in a coma." Suddenly Rory's vision was in slow motion. She felt her world stand still, and then it started to tip. There was nothing she could do. Her world was crashing. It was over. There was nothing more to be said. She could no longer feel the early spring breeze...she couldn't feel the ground or hear the trees swaying. There was a loud buzzing in her head as if the sound had been turned off, but the television was left on.

Her head snapped up and she saw Baker jumping towards her. Her vision sped up and her hearing returned as she found herself in Baker's arms, her back a foot from the ground. She hadn't even felt herself falling.

_**And the record won't stop skipping **_

_**And the lies just won't stop slipping **_

_**And besides my reputation's on the line **_

_**We can fake it for the airwaves **_

_**Force our smiles, baby half dead**_


	20. Good News

**A/N: Filler chapter. The next one will the more eventful and longer. I don't own _Good News_ by Something Corporate.**

**_She's trapped inside her room _**

**_With reruns on the screen _**

**_Old books and movies _**

**_But she can't stop thinking._**

**_She waits all day _**

**_She stands a stranger in her skin _**

**_She moves in science with her hands_**

Rory sat in the waiting room of the hospital, her head on Blake's shoulder. Their father was sitting across from her with his head in his hands, and Shane was next to him, staring at the wall without an expression. Emily and Richard were sitting one seat down from them, his arm around his wife. And Strobe and Francine were next to their son, his mother patting him on the back. The hanging clock was ticking the seconds away, and she pulled her head from her twin's shoulder and slid her right knee up to her chest, winding her arms around her shin. Blake glanced over at her, the inside of his cheeks pulled between his teeth. She was watching the clock, trying to figure out how long they'd all been there...two, three hours? Her perception of time seemed to have gone.

Richard stood up, "Rory, Blake, Shane, perhaps you should go. You have school tomorrow and it's getting late. There's no use in you staying here."

Shane just blinked up at him, and Rory's eyes never left the wall. Blake was silent for a moment before he stood, pulling his siblings up, "Come on." he wrapped his arm around Rory's shoulders and ruffled Shane's hair as the other two stood slowly. All three stood in front of their father, who never even looked up. Rory bit her lip, looking away, and Blake could see tears in her eyes. He just shook his head, moving over to kiss Emily on the cheek, "Call us if there's any change."

She pulled him to her chest tightly, "Of course." The other two hugged her in turn, and after saying goodbye to the rest of the family, walked out slowly, their feet dragging to Blake's car.

"Dad didn't even look at us." Shane said quietly, climbing into the back of the car.

Rory shook her head, "He won't. The only thing he ever cared about was mom-"

"Don't say shit like that, Rory." Blake cut her off. "She's not dead."

Rory was silent as they pulled out of the parking lot. She looked out the window, shaking her head as she said under her breath, "Close enough."

"Shut the fuck up Rory. You're not making this any easier!" he yelled, not taking his eyes off the road.

She rolled her eyes, biting the side of her tongue as they slid down the street in silence. There was tension and anger in the air as they pulled into the driveway. Shane swung the back door open and slid out, bidding goodnight to the other two before slamming the door. The twins sat in the car, neither speaking. Rory's arms were crossed heavily against her chest as she stared out the window, refusing to look at Blake. She pulled on the latch to open the door, but nothing happened. "Take the child safety locks off, Blake."

"No."

"Fucking take them off!" she yelled.

"No!" he yelled back, "We aren't going anywhere. I'm not unlocking the door. I'm trying to keep this family together. Shane is fucking losing hope and you're being a bitch isn't making it any easier. So we're just going to sit here until you talk to me!"

She shook her head, looking away from him as she folded her arms across her chest again. And they sat like that, Blake staring at her, and her staring at one of the trees in the driveway. She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, "What do you want me to say?"

He shook his head, "I don't know what the hell's going on with you. I mean, I would have thought you would have been better about this, Rory. Shane and dad I would have expected to fall apart, but not you."

She looked over at him, "I don't know what to say, Blake." she looked away, "I mean, the last thing I said to her was that I didn't want to talk to her."

His head cocked back, "What were you guys talking about?"

She closed her eyes, shaking her head, "Nothing. We just got into a fight. I don't want to talk about it."

"So what? You think she was mad at you or something?"

"I just...Blake, what if dad is right to loose hope? What if she really doesn't wake up? What would we do? I mean, he hasn't spoken to us since the wreck. He's never home, and the only times he is, he stays locked in his room or office. What would we do?"

He shook his head in disbelief, "We'd do what we always do. We'd make it work. But right now we have to think everything will turn out alright. We have to for Shane."

She shook her head, "This isn't a movie, Blake. This is real."

"I know. But that doesn't matter. We have to believe that it'll be okay. Don't you see how important it is that we believe that? If we don't then who will?"

She was silent for a moment before looking over at him, "I don't know if I can." she whispered.

He looked out of his own window, "Then fake it."

_**ONE WEEK LATER**_

Rory was sitting on Adam's bed, leaning against the headboard and watching The Real World as he kissed down her neck. She tilted her head towards him and raised her right shoulder to make him stop, and he pulled back. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head, "Nothing." Adam was an amazing kisser, she would give him that. Even if he hadn't had impeccable breeding, been gorgeous, and had perfect charm, he could have still made any girl swoon for his lips. But right now she didn't want to do anything or be touched.

"You seem tense." she just gave him an annoyed look. He hadn't said anything about her mother other than to ask her how she was doing the day after the accident. Maybe he didn't want to make her think about it, or maybe he really was a jerk. She still couldn't decide.

"I'm just tired." He nodded and grabbed her hand, shifting her so that he was behind her and she was resting against his chest. They hadn't slept together, and Rory wasn't sure she wanted to. She knew he did...but that wouldn't do anything for her decision. He began to rub slow circles in her hip. She jumped and shifted quickly away, as if he'd burned her.

He pulled his hand back, surprised as his eyes widened, "What?"

She shook her head, swallowing the lump in her throat, "Don't do that."

"What-"

She cut him off, "Just...don't'." she gripped the sheet with a shaking hand, and Adam's eyes slowly returned to their normal size.

"...okay." he said slowly, taking her hand in his own and pulling her back. She closed her eyes cautiously, biting her lip. Tristan had used to trace circles into her hip...whenever he knew she wasn't okay...but she knew that Adam couldn't read her like that. "Are you okay?"

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him. Rory laid her arms gingerly over his, trying to feel something from his touch that she knew was there, but couldn't put her finger on. She moved her head...it slid across his chest, but she didn't look up at him, "I'm fine."

_**THREE DAYS LATER**_

Rory leaned against the wall next to Jess's mattress, watching the rain through his window. He tossed a book to her in order to get her attention, and she caught it instinctively. Her gaze rose up to his face, and she saw that he was leaning against the wall, watching her intently. "You alright?"

She bit her lip, inhaling deeply, "Fine. Why do you ask?"

He made his way slowly over to the mattress and sat down next to her, "Because I know you're not."

She shrugged, looking down and messing with the cover of the book in her hands, "I don't know what you're talking about." Jess looked down, chuckling softly. Rory's head whipped up to look at him, "What?"

He shook his head, "Nothing. It's just...lying was never one of your strong points, especially to me."

She shrugged, "I'm fine." Jess shrugged, not pushing it. He just looked at her, nodding slowly. Her eyes were glued to the window, determined not to look at him. They sat like that for five minutes, neither speaking. Neither changing the objects they were observing. Finally, she broke and turned to face him, "What?"

"Have you talked about it at all?" he asked.

"Talked about what?"

"Your mom's accident?"

She shrugged uncertainly, "Yeah..."

"Or not?" he challenged.

"I don't know. Me and Blake talked about it for a little while. But I don't want to dwell on it."

"You know, Rory, you can talk to me about anything."

She nodded, glancing over at him, "I know."

"So then why don't you?"

"Jess..." she said quietly, almost as a groan.

Rory..."

She looked down, shaking her head, "I don't have anything to say about it."

"That's not true."

She laughed lightly, humorlessly, "You can read my mind, now?"

He grinned, flicking her hair lightly, "I've always been able to read your mind."

Rory laid down, staring up at the ceiling, "I guess...I feel like she was mad at me when she wrecked." she said slowly, thoughtfully.

Jess laid beside her, "Yeah?"

"Yeah." she raised her arms straight up, staring at them by the soft glow of the lamp light. "I mean, I know she was mad at me, but I'm just not sure of how mad."

"I'm sure she wasn't. Lorelai can never stay mad at you." She was silent, watching her fingers move above her head. "What were you fighting about anyway?"

Rory shrugged, "Stupid teenage stuff." she was quiet, and then, "The last thing I said to her was that I didn't want to talk to her. And then I went to Baker's because I didn't want to be in my house. That was when Blake called me." she fell silent, and Jess didn't speak for several minutes. She could feel tears sting the corners of her eyes before they slid vertically to the bed. Jess moved his left hand to her right and slid his fingers between hers, clasping their hands together above them. They gazed at her smaller hand that was encircled by his larger one. Neither spoke, and they sat in a comfortable silence until Jess heard her sniff quietly. He pulled her closer and she rested her head slowly on his shoulder, closing her eyes as the tears started to fall faster.

He unclasped their hands and wrapped his arm around her, playing with her hair comfortingly. She clutched onto the front of his shirt with her left hand, burying her face deeper into his shoulder. And Jess, her best friend in the whole world...the boy that knew her better than almost anyone...one of the people she loved most in the world. Jess, her best friend, the one person she could talk to...he just held her as she cried.

_**She lines her walls **_

_**With every paper she can see **_

_**These words consume her **_

_**But they never set her free **_

_**And then she looked at me to scream,**_

_** 'My castles are falling'**_

_**But I can't look into the street **_

_**Without everything changing**_

****

**A/N: I know, I know, a filler chapter. The next will be much more eventful, trust me.**


	21. The Clincher

**A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or the song _The Clincher_ by Chevelle**

_**These are the limits when one's buried **_

_**This body's left the soul **_

_**Could we have known **_

_**Never would I , helped to nail down **_

_**Careful of drifting off **_

_**Now losing taste and touch**_

Tristan sat in his room, tossing a tennis ball up and down as Rick talked on his cell phone, a small smile on his face, "So you take Miller Street to the end and you're the last house on the right?" he smirked at Tristan, "Yeah. Okay I'll see you tomorrow." he hung up and grinned at Tristan, "Bow down to your savior."

The blonde's eyes were following the tennis ball that he was throwing up and down. He glanced over at his friend, "What the hell are you going on about now?"

He fell onto his bed, a smug smirk in place, "I happen to have just scored us an invite to the party of the year this Friday night."

Tristan's eyes stayed on the ball, "Yeah?" he asked, uninterested.

"Yeah." Rick replied, "Amy Norton and Mackenzie Myers are throwing it. They are without a doubt the most kick-ass party throwers for seventy miles and the hottest girls in Clarksville. Come on, you can't turn down an invite from these girls"

"Did _you_ get invited, or did _we_ gent invited?" Tristan asked from his place in Rick's bean bag chair.

"I got invited with the request to bring the, and I quote, '_Hot new piece of ass that is said to have been hanging around with me'_ end quote."

Tristan snorted, rolling the tennis ball between his hands. The school was out in the country. Something about keeping the boys' minds on school and training rather than on the other things young people do. There were three small towns within fifty miles of the school and the boys went to the towns on their leave weekends. It was a very southern feeling, being more than eighty miles from a large city. The three towns together only supplied meager entertainment; a pool hall, a drive in movie, a small bowling alley, several restaurants, a liquor store that didn't check ID, and the occasional high school party.

"I mean come on, you need to get out."

Tristan glanced down at the ball thoughtfully before coking his arm back and throwing it at his roommate. Rick crashed to the floor and covered his head to avoid a concussion. He sat up and looked at the wall where the ball had hit before turning to look at his friend in disbelief. "Yeah" Tristan shrugged, "I guess I'll go."

_**FRIDAY**_

Tristan sat on one of the couches in Amy Norton's living room. His right hand was curled around the neck of a glass bottle that was resting on his knee. His left hand was balled into a fist and laid limply on the cushion. He took a drink, his eyes not leaving the people dancing...the people grinding. It made him think of Rory. They had danced like that before, and the thought almost brought a smile to his face. She'd never danced like that before, but after a quick lesson from Louise she'd been willing to try it with him. She hadn't had much practice, but she was a natural. Everything with them was natural. Everything fit.

He was pulled from his musings when a weight was deposited on the couch next to him, "You're not dancing."

"Very observant."

"Ha. Ha." she obviously wasn't very amused. He laughed lightly and glanced over at the girl next to him as she spoke again, she didn't seem like an idiot, which was refreshing, "So you're the new guy."

"That would be correct."

She rolled her eyes, "I'm Mackenzie."

"Tristan."

"You're from Connecticut, right?"

"Yeah." he took another drink.

She shook her head, clicking her tongue, "Yankee."

He laughed, "Damn straight."

She smiled, "So how do you like the south?"

Tristan took another drink and glanced at the couples dancing, "It's humid."

She laughed, "Yeah." Tristan looked over at her as she continued talking. She was hot, he'd give her that. Long, straight, light brown hair. Tan with a little compact body. Green eyes. Full lips. Straight white teeth. She had a nice voice. Not too high. She wasn't a fast talker. She always sounded like she was about to laugh. "So do you want to dance?" he glanced over at the clock,  
had she really been sitting there for ten minutes?

He took another swig of his drink, "Maybe later."

Her eyebrow arched and she gave him a questioning look, "Mm-hmm."

"What?"

She shook her head, amused, "Nothing. I'll see you around, Yankee." she stood up and made her way into the kitchen.

Tristan just smiled, looking back at the couples as Stewart came and fell onto the couch next to him, "Did I just see Mackenzie Myers walk away from you?"

"Is that her last name?" he asked nonchalantly.

"Did she ask you to dance?"

"Yeah."

His jaw dropped, "And you turned her down?"

"I said maybe later."

"What? Dugrey, man, you're not in your right mind. Myers never asks anyone to dance. If she does, the guy gets laid. She's only asked two guys to dance since I met her. I cannot believe that you just turned down an opportunity like that."

Tristan just rolled his eyes as Stewart stood up, "You're such a sad person, Stewart."

He shrugged, "Any guy would have to be fucked in the head to turn her down, my friend. I just lost like, eighty-five percent of the respect I had for you."

He laughed, "Nice to know I can disappoint you."

Stewart grinned and stood, "See you around Dugrey."

"Later."

_**KITCHEN**_

Rick made his way into the kitchen to see Mackenzie leaning across the counter, talking to Amy. He cam up behind her and kissed her cheek. She turned and smiled widely, kissing him gently. "Hey sweetie."

He grinned, "Hey Kink. Amy." he nodded to the other girl and she returned the greeting.

Mackenzie spoke, "How long have you been here?"

He shook his head, "Not long. Hey, can I talk to you real quick?"

She nodded, "Yeah." she bid good bye to Amy and led Rick out the back door and into the yard. They walked in silence to a swing set. She sat and he began to push her gently, "So how've you been?"

"Great. What about you?"

She shrugged casually, "Can't complain."

"Is Trey still messing with you?" he asked, referring to a guy who had tried to hook up with her at a previous party...of course he hadn't allowed that to happen since Mackenzie didn't want it. The ass had walked away with a shiner over his left eye.

"No. He hasn't come near me since his eye healed."

"Good." They had a strange relationship. They'd hooked up several times when they first met, but it had been months since they had realized that although they were physically attracted to each other, their feelings were platonic. And now they were more like brother and sister than anything. And Rick worried about her. "I saw you talking to Dugrey."

"Yeah. He seemed like a nice guy."

"He is."

They sat in silence for a while, the only sounds were her toes scraping the ground, his hands hitting her back, and the chains creaking as she swayed. "He just seems different." she said quietly, knowing that Rick had brought her out here for something important.

"He is a really good guy, and I love you to death, but Kink-" he used her nickname, "-do not get involved with him."

"What?" they were close, but they both had their hookups, and he had never tried to stop her form hooking up with anyone before.

"It's just..." he shook his head, "He's my roommate, and you're one of my best friends. Hell, you're like my fucking sister. So I'm going to tell you this because I care and I don't want you to get hurt." she was silent, inviting him to continue. He grabbed her waist as she swayed back in the swing, "Don't get involved with him. He had to leave a girl when he came here, and he's nowhere near being over her. I don't want either of you to get hurt. I know him and I know you. He's the type of guy that you would date. You'd want a relationship and you'd just wind up hurt, because he wouldn't want one. I don't even know if he'd hook up with anyone." he took a breath and she dragged her feet on the ground to stop the swing. Rick walked around so that he was in front of her, and he grabbed the chains, leaning closer. She looked down.

"Kink." he said her name quietly and she looked up at him, "I know that I can't stop you if you're dead set on getting him. But please just trust me when I say that you'll wind up hurt. I'm only looking out for you." She turned her face away and stood up, not looking at him. He sighed, running a hand through his hair, "Just be careful." he whispered.

_**CONNECTICUT**_

Rory pulled her knees to her chest, "_Oh Adam_..." she called in a sing-song voice.

"Oh Rory..." he called back from his place next to her on her front lawn, his eyes closed and his hands under his head.

She smiled, laying on her stomach, "It's almost April."

"Yes it is."

"You know what that means..."

"No, I don't."

"It's spring."

"Ahh." he laughed at his girlfriend, "Yes, so it is."

"Which means we only have a month and a half left in school."

"Yep." She smiled, laying her head on the back of her hand and closing her eyes. They laid in a comfortable silence for a few minutes until he spoke, "Hey Ror?"

"Hmm?"

"I've been thinking."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"About what?"

"You and me."

"Good thoughts?" she asked, her voice heavy with sleep.

He smiled to himself, "Yeah. Good thoughts. And I've come to a conclusion."

"What's that?" she asked, not really listening. He was quiet, and when he didn't answer her, she tapped him lightly with her foot, "What's your conclusion, babe?"

"I love you."

Her eyes snapped open, "What?"

"I love you." he was silent for a moment, "I've never said that to anyone before. But I do."

She shook her head slowly, "Adam, I don't-" but he cut her off.

"You don't have to say anything. I just wanted to get that out. I do. I really do." She sat up, her legs stretched out in front of her and her hands pressed palm down behind her, holding her body up. He sat up as well, and they were facing each other. He leaned forward and kissed her lightly, the fingers of his right hand finding her hip and rubbing light circles into it. It was wrong, it was all wrong. She pulled away, looking over every inch of his face, but she didn't see him. She knew he had light skin, black hair, green eyes. But she didn't see that. All she saw was blonde hair. Blue eyes.

_**NEXT DAY**_

Jess stood from his place on the couch in the Hayden's basement, looking over his friends as they moved around the room. Henry and Lane were standing outside; Rory and Paris were in the next room watching a movie; Blake and Madeline were sitting across the room with their heads bent, talking quietly, and Louise and Baker had disappeared fifteen minutes ago. He looked around to try and find Adam, and he grinned to himself when he spotted him getting a drink out of the fridge.

He made his way over to him, "Hey Hart, can I talk to you for a minute?"

Adam looked up, surprised. He and Jess didn't get along all that well, they didn't talk. "Sure." Jess nodded towards the stairs and they went up to the main floor. "What's up?" he asked, tossing the bottle between his hands.

Jess shrugged, "Look, normally I wouldn't say anything, but I feel kinda bad for you-"

Adam interrupted, "Wha-"

Jess ignored him, "-I mean, I can tell that you're a great guy and all, but you're just trying way to hard."

"What are you talking about?"

"Rory."

Adam's eyes narrowed, "What about her?"

Jess shook his head, "She didn't say it back, did she?"

"What?"

"You are trying way too hard. She likes you. I mean, God knows why cause I sure as hell don't, but she seems to like you alright."

"What the fuck-"

Jess cut him off, "Look, I'm only saying something cause you're bugging me, and I'm worried about Rory. Now I know I'm probably crossing a line, but I really don't care. Slow down. I know you said that you love her-"

"How do you know that!"

He rolled his eyes, "I know Rory. I can tell you said something to her, and the only thing that would bother her that much would be you saying that you love her. Now look, you're a nice guy, I don't have a problem with you. But be careful. Rory isn't in this for love. She's in it just to have fun and be a teenager. Don't try to get you to fall in love with you because she won't. I don't even know if she believes in it anymore-"

"Why are you telling me this?"

"I"m just trying to save you a lot of heartache. Look, you weren't here when any shit with Dean was going on. You weren't here when all the stuff with Tristan happened. There's a lot of history with the nine people in this house that you don't understand. And that's okay, no one will ask you to understand because you just can't. But I'll tell you one thing: the girl you're after, while she is going out with you, she's not going to fall for you. She'll never love you. Rory already had her high school sweetheart. She had teenage love. I mean yes, I do care about Paris, but I'm not going to marry her. It's not real love, I know that. None of us are actually in love with each other and we know that. But Rory and Tristan-that was real, and they were the last ones to realize it. What they had was real, it was more than a lot of people will ever have. Somebody doesn't just walk away from that, and Rory hasn't.

"So I'm not telling you this to piss you off, I'm not telling you to hurt you. I'm telling you to try and help you. I know you told her that you loved her because I was around when Dean said it." Adam's eyes were narrowed, and Jess could tell that his best friend's boyfriend really didn't like him at the moment, "She didn't say it back, did she?"

He crossed, his arms, "No."

He smirked, "Yeah. All I'm saying is be careful. Don't rush in."

_**NORTH CAROLINA**_

Tristan sat on Mackenzie's bed the next night. A large group of people were watching a football game in the living room. He'd been watching it for half an hour before they'd wound up back there. He didn't even know who was playing or what the score was when he left. All he'd been able to focus on was the girl talking non-stop next to him. Mackenzie was a sweet girl, and she was hot for him. So fucking hot for him. He knew it. Several guys from the academy, along with a few girls and some boys from Clarksville High were lounging around the house, eating, watching TV, swimming, whatever. At two o'clock in the morning.

She walked out of the bathroom that was adjacent to her room and smiled at him, having fixed her hair and makeup. Tristan was sitting on the edge of the bed with his jeans on and no shirt. She was good in bed, he'd give her that. He grabbed his drink off the bedside table and took a long swallow. He felt bad because he knew that she picked up on it, but he couldn't help it. It was wrong. This was all wrong. He had to wash the taste of her out of his mouth.

Mackenzie looked at him uncertainly, her eyes falling onto the amber liquid in the glass, uncertainty flickering through her eyes. She wasn't used to guys drinking after sleeping with her. She walked over to him and bent down to kiss him, but he turned his head. She wasn't the right person. And he felt like shit for treating her the way he was.

She bit her lip and stood up, looking away form him, "What?" he asked.

Mackenzie shook her head, "Nothing." and that was their agreement. That was what this was. Nothing.

He sighed, standing up and running a hand through his hair before pulling on his shirt. This wasn't right. He actually felt bad about it. He hadn't felt bad about fucking a girl and then hurting her...ever. Other that Rory, who didn't fall into the category of a one night stand. He wasn't like most sixteen year olds. His sex life probably didn't even sound real if you looked at it from the outside. He could've gotten any girl he wanted...and had wound up in compromising situations with most of them. He looked and acted older than he was. No one believed his age when he told them.

He wasn't like most sixteen year olds, but right now he felt like shit for being like this to her. Tristan walked over to her and touched her face, "Kenzie..." he raised her chin so that she faced him, and his breath caught in his throat. Her eyes met his and his stomach dropped. He shook his head and dropped his hand, leaving the room without looking back. He made his way quickly through the living room, and he was out the front door by the time his friends realized he'd passed by.

Kyle, Stewart, and Rick ran out the door after him. "Man, did I just see you walk out of Kenzie's room?" Kyle asked, grinning as they followed him down the deserted street.

Tristan continued walking briskly down the road, "Yeah."

"Hell yeah. You got her?" Stewart asked, hitting the blonde on the back.

"Get the fuck off me." Tristan growled, pushing him away. The two boys stopped, shocked, but Rick continued to follow his roommate down the pavement.

"Tristan."

"Leave me alone."

"Hey man, it's alright." He turned to face Rick and opened his mouth to argue, but closed it and shook his head, turning back and walking away. This time no one followed him.

She wasn't the right person. Her hair was too light. Her eyes were the wrong color. He hadn't really seen her until after the fact. He knew what she looked like, but all he'd seen was someone else. All he'd seen was dark brown hair. Blue eyes.

_**Could we have known **_

_**Never would I, helped to nail down **_

_**With nothing left to gain **_

_**Here's the clincher **_

_**This should be you**_

****

_A/N: Uneventful, I know. But stuff will start happening soon, I promise._


	22. Jude Law And A Semester Abroad

A/N: I don't own _Jude Law And A Semester Abroad_ by Brand New 

_**Whatever poison's in this bottle **_

_**Will leave me broken, sore, and stiff **_

_**But it's the genie at the bottom who I'm sucking at **_

_**He owes me one last wish **_

_**So here's a present to let you know I still exist **_

_**I hope the next boy that you kiss **_

_**Has something terribly contagious on his lips **_

_**But I got a plan **_

_**Drink for forty days and forty nights **_

_**A sip for every second-hand tick **_

_**And for every time you fed me the line, "you mean so much to me"**_

_**I'm without you**_

Paris walked over to Rory after school, her arms folded over her chest, "_So_." she smiled knowingly.

She looked over, "Hmm?"

"He said 'I love you'." she stated rather than asked.

Rory shrugged, rolling her eyes, "Yeah."

Paris smirked, "Number three in the last year. Very impressive, Hayden."

She laughed, "Yeah. I'm so proud of myself."

"Ten months. Three boyfriends. Three confessions. One return." she shook her head, "All hail the heart breaker."

Rory rolled her eyes, "How sweet."

Her friend nodded, "Are you going to say it back?"

The brunette looked away, staring at the people milling around and calling goodbyes to their friends. She bit her bottom lip, folding her arms over her stomach with a pained look on her face. She shook her head, "I don't love him, Paris. I'd hate to hurt him, but I just don't."

"Is it weird, him having said it and you not feeling the same way?"

"A little, I guess." Rory uncrossed her arms, "I don't know, we're just kind of acting like he never said it." she looked over at her friend, "How did you know he said it? I didn't tell you."

She shrugged, "I could just tell."

Rory nodded, rubbing her arms and looking down at the ground as they stood in silence for several minutes. "Paris?" she said quietly.

"Hmm?"

"Why..." she trailed off, folding her arms and looking over the grounds again, "Why did he leave?" The blonde became still and silent, surprised into the inability to move or think. Rory didn't look at her, "I mean, I know you know. I just want to know too."

"Rory..." she said softly, wanting to talk her out of it, but not willing to keep the information from her if she really wanted to know.

"I mean, what happened? What did he do that was so bad?"

Paris sighed, shuffling her feet and looking down, "He didn't do anything." she said quietly.

She looked over at her, "What?"

Paris looked over at her friend, "There wasn't one action Tristan did that made his parents send him away."

Rory's eyes narrowed and she shook her head lightly, "Well then what the hell was it?"

Paris sighed, "Rory, what was the one thing about Tristan that his parents couldn't stand? What was the sorest point between them?"

She was silent for a moment before shrugging silently. "I don't know."

The blonde ran her fingers through her hair, "Or should I say _who_?"

Rory froze, her jaw dropped slightly and her head shifted slowly to the side in disbelief, "What"  
her breath came out in a short gasp.

Paris nodded, "Yeah."

"But why...what did I do?"

She shook her head, "You didn't do anything. His parents told him to end it with you and his dad started talking about you-" Rory looked down, "-and you know Tristan, he won't stand for anyone disgracing your name." she smiled bitterly and shook her head, "They got into this huge blowout and it ended with his dad telling him to pack his bags. He wouldn't, so his parents had the maids do it." she glanced over at her friend and saw tears flooding her eyes, but she refused to let them spill over. Paris shook her head, looking back over at the now empty parking lot, "You know, at any time he could have said that he would do it. At any moment in that two week period that he knew he was leaving, he could have ended it and he would have been able to stay, but he didn't do it. He couldn't."

Rory shook her head and swallowed the lump in her throat, the emotion thick in her voice, "Why didn't he?" she whispered.

Paris inhaled deeply and shook her head, "He couldn't stand to live here. He said he couldn't be near you and not be able to be with you."

Rory took a moment to digest that information, but the gears in her head changed, "Does he know about-"

She cut her off, "Yeah. He's been told about Adam."

"So then he knows that we're together?" Paris nodded silently, refusing to look at her friend, and she sensed Rory's hand going to her mouth to cover up her chocking back emotion. "I didn't know." she whispered. Paris turned to look at her, and saw that tears were streaking down her cheeks. One hand was at her mouth and she had one arm wrapped around her waist like she was going to be sick. "I didn't know."

_**FRIDAY NIGHT**_

Rory sat at Richard and Emily's table, across from Strobe and Francine and between her two brothers. Their father was working late...again. It had been two days since she'd seen him and almost a week since they'd spoken. She kept crossing and uncrossing her legs, nervous of why they'd been asked to come tonight. The only sound in the entire dinning room was that of forks and knives scraping porcelain. And it had been like that for half an hour. She was going crazy, and luckily she was saved from being driven insane by Strobe clearing his throat. The three teenagers looked up, their eyes falling on him. He looked over at Emily, and Emily looked up at Richard. Rory's eyes finally fell on her mother's father, and she saw him sigh and set down his fork.

He looked over at his grandchildren, obviously trying to smile, "Kids, how' ve you been"

"We've been fine, grandpa." Blake answered.

Richard nodded uncomfortably and looked up at his wife. She set her utensils down as well, "Well I'm done." everyone murmured in agreement. "Shall we move to the sitting room?"

They all pushed out their chairs and stood, making their way slowly to the other room. The kids sat on the couch, the women on the love-seat, and the men in recliners. Richard once again took the lead in the conversation, "We've been discussing your...situation." he said slowly. Looking mainly at Blake, "You only have a little over a month left in school. And the four of us, along with your father, have come to a decision." They sat in silence for a moment, their breath still. "The three of you will be going to stay with your aunt Margaret's daughter Rebekah, in England this summer." he finished, and a heavy weight fell upon the group.

No one moved. The three on the couch sat in silence. Rory's breath caught in her chest, and Blake made a sound from the back of his throat that only she could hear. Aunt Margaret was Francine's late sister. Rebekah was their father's least favorite cousin. She lived in the country, twenty miles from the closest town. They'd only visited once, and that was just passing through on a backpacking trip through Europe the previous summer. She had four children: and eighteen year old boy, a fifteen year old boy, a twelve year old girl, and an eight year old boy. They were all nice kids as far as the Hayden children could tell. Mind, they'd only spent two days around them in their entire lives.

Shane was the first to find his voice, "How long?"

Richard was hesitant, so Strobe answered for him, "Seven weeks."

Three sets of eyes became as large as dinner plates. Shane sank back into the cushions, Blake leaned forward, his elbows in his knees and his face buried in his hands, and Rory sat straight up, her face emotionless. "Why?" she asked quietly, unable to say more.

This time Emily answered, her voice soft and dry, "Your father is going through a deep depression. He's throwing himself into his work and unable to take care of you three right now. By going away this summer, it will give him a chance to slow down and realize that he can handle things. This is mostly for your father, but also for the three of you. It's healthy to get out and experience other places. You need to get your minds off of the depressing things."

She was smiling tightly when she finished, but the three people she was addressing were doing quite the opposite. Shane was looking at her with a rude expression on his face that seemed to wordlessly ask if she was insane, Rory's mouth was open slightly, her head angled slightly down in disbelief, and Blake's face had come away from his hands. His hair was all over the place and his face was red from where his hands had been exerting pressure on it.

"The depressing things? Grandma, we're not trying to focus on depressing things. We're trying not to dwell on them, but our mother has been in a coma for over a month, and they say it doesn't look like she's coming out anytime soon. Our father has not only thrown himself into his work, but has decided that we don't even exist. And now you're telling us that we're leaving for almost two months to go somewhere that we've only visited once, we're staying with people that we barely even know, and we have no choice in the matter. If we were to not focus on the negative things then we wouldn't be focusing on anything that's going on."

Her eyes were wide and her hand was on her chest, "Blake-"

He cut her off, his voice soft, "I don't mean to be rude, grandma, but that's a lot to take in." She nodded, understanding, and the party of seven sat in silence.

_**NORTH CAROLINA**_

Tristan sat in his room, watching the ground as Stewart, Kyle, and Rick ran around the room like idiots...drunken idiots. A bottle of Jack Daniels rested on his own knee, his hand clasped around he neck. He heard something shatter, Kyle scream like a girl, and Rick explode into laughter. But he didn't look up. He couldn't. The pattern of the carpet thread was just so interesting. And it got him thinking. Thinking about everything again. It had been three weeks since the first time he'd hooked up with Mackenzie. And last weekend they'd hooked up again.

Something blunt hit the wall and he heard Stewart curse, and this time Rick's shriek of laughter was high pitched. He didn't look up, but out of the corner of his eye he saw Stewart fall to the floor after running into the wall.

Even last night he'd hooked up with her again...but it didn't mean anything. They were just fuck buddies, and that was all he wanted. He spun the bottle slowly, letting the thoughts sink in. If looks could kill, the carpet would have a hole burned straight through it. A silence fell over the room. The other three boys came to sit with him, and they started telling drinking stories.

He wasn't really listening, and he didn't mean to say it, but when they asked him share one of his drunken tales, all that came out was a quiet, "Fuck her." and his eyes never left the floor.

The other three fell quiet, and Rick spoke, "What?"

He shook his head without looking up at them, "Fuck Rory. I fucking love her and she doesn't even care. She got a new damn boyfriend less than two months after I left. Fuck her. I hate her."

They sat in complete silence, looking at each other in surprise while Tristan continued to glare at the floor, "Tristan, man, what are you talking about?" Stewart asked, having heard about Tristan's ex-girlfriend, but never her name.

He shook his head, "Rory. The girl I was dating back home. She doesn't even care that I love her. She fucking moved on and started dating that jerk as soon as he moved there. She doesn't care about me. She never fucking cared about me. She doesn't even know she's the reason I'm here. Fuck her. I hate her. I wish I'd never fucking met her, she can go to hell for all I care. Fuck Adam too. He replaced me-" his head finally raised to look at them, "-he took my girl, he took my friends, my school...hell, he took my fucking life. Fuck them. I hope she goes to hell, her and her fucking Adam and Dean."

This confused the other three even more, none of then ever having heard the name Dean. But Rick had heard about Adam. "Tristan..." Rick said quietly, warning him that he was going to wind up saying too much. But Tristan didn't seem to care, because he continued ranting.

"I was her first." he stood and began pacing the room. The other three froze, mouths open. Whenever they'd gotten drunk and discussed the girls they'd gotten into bed, Tristan had refused to talk about Rory, and no matter what any of them said, he wouldn't even tell them if he'd slept with her or not, but it seemed as if it was all about to come out. "She wanted me to be. And I wanted to be. I was the first guy she had sex with. I took her fucking virginity. I'd never taken a girl's virginity before. I never want to again. I don't want anyone else. I want her. Fuck her. I love her. I don't want Mackenzie." he stopped in his rant and turned to face them, "I swear if she fucks him I'll kick his ass." He shook his head, "I don't care if she's not mine anymore. He can't have that part of her." he started pacing again, muttering under his breath, "Fuck her."

Kyle looked around, "Do you have a picture of her?"

Tristan nodded distractedly and waved his hand over in the general area of his desk, "The lap drawer." Kyle walked over to it and slid the long drawer open, pushing papers out of the way until he got to the bottom and pulled out an envelope. There was a picture of Tristan, Blake, Jess, and Baker all laughing and holding beer bottles. There was a picture of himself and Paris grinning at the camera during school one day. One of Rory, Louise, Madeline, Paris, and Lane at the twins' birthday party, one of Lane and Henry together, one of Blake, himself, and Rory, and the last at the bottom was a picture of the two of them together. He'd been sitting on a kitchen table-type chair in Louise's basement and Rory had walked over and sat in his lap. The picture had been taken by Madeline, who'd been standing up, so it was angled down. He had his arms wrapped around her waist and her arms were around his neck. She was sitting side ways on his lap, her head tilted slightly as she grinned at the camera. But at the moment Madeline had snapped it, Tristan had turned to look at the girl in his lap, so while Rory was facing the camera, Tristan was staring at her.

Stewart came up to look over Kyle's shoulder, "That her?" he asked quietly, all of them having sobered slightly.

Tristan ran his fingers through his hair, "Yeah. That's her."

The two boys laid all six pictures in a row and looked at the three Rory was in, "She's gorgeous." Rick said quietly, walking over. The other two just nodded.

Tristan shook his head, taking a shaky breath as he looked out the window, not having been able to glance at the pictures, "She's perfect." he exhaled the breath, "I hate her so much." the other three looked up to see him sitting on the bed, shaking his head, "Fuck her."

_**Tell all the English boys you meet **_

_**About the American boy back in the states **_

_**The American boy you used to date **_

_**Who would do anything you say.**_

_**I still taste you **_

_**And thus reserve my right to hate you **_

_**And all this empty space that you create **_

_**Does nothing for my flawless sense of style**_

_A/N: Yes, I know what you're thinking, **'is Tristan ever coming back?'** well the answer to your question is yes, he will. Eventually. I promise. And never fear, there will be much drama, angst, and all the things that make a Trory when he does._


	23. Move Along

_A/N: I don't own **Move Along** by The All American Rejects. This isn't my best chapter. In fact,  
I really don't like it, but I can't think of how to fix it, so there you go. The next one will be better though._

_**When all you got to keep is strong **_

_**Move along, move along like I know you do **_

_**And even when your hope is gone **_

_**Move along, move along just to make it through**_

Tristan sat on top of one of the picnic tables in the quad at lunch on the second to last week of the semester. Rick, Kyle, and Stewart were sitting on the benches, all of them studying for their exams next week. He rolled his pen between his palms, looking from the book in his lap down to his feet planted on the bench. "Hey, Rick?"

"Yeah?" he didn't look up from his Calculus notes.

"Does anybody stay here over the summer?"

"Yeah. A lot of guys do for different reasons."

"Like what?"

He shrugged, "If they're court ordered to come, then they can't go home for a certain number of months. Since some students are here year round, some teachers have to stay, and if they have kids who go here then their kids stay..." he was quiet for a moment, "...other times people just don't want to go home...or their parents don't want them around." Tristan nodded, and Rick continued, "Why?"

Tristan shrugged, "I might not go back this summer."

Kyle looked up, surprised, "Why?"

He shook his head, "Unless I'm going back for good I don't want to go back at all. Besides, I doubt my parents want me around."

The other three were silent, all of them knowing that his parents not wanting him around wasn't the real reason for his not wanting to go home. It had been more than two weeks since the night of Tristan's drunken confessions, and no one had mentioned it. "That's aight." Stewart said awkwardly, "Me and Rick stay over the summers too."

_**HARTFORD**_

Rory sat across from Paris at lunch, tapping her pen on the table nervously as she stared at her notes. "So when do you guys leave?" she asked quietly.

"The second." Rory answered without looking up. Paris glanced over at the calendar hanging on the cafeteria wall. It was the eighteenth of May. They would be leaving in fifteen days.

"What day do you get back?" Madeline asked.

Blake looked over at his girlfriend from his place next to her, "July twenty first." She bit her lip and looked away from him.

Rory pulled another textbook out of her bag and laid it on top of the first one. She inhaled shakily and ran her fingers through her hair, getting it out of her face. The book fell open and she flipped quietly through the pages, unable to understand anything on them. Adam touched her elbow lightly and she jumped. "You okay?" he whispered, concerned.

She blinked quickly and nodded, "Yeah. I'm fine. Just really stressed."

"Do you want to do something tonight to take your mind off of everything? We could go out. Stay at my house. Do whatever you want."

She opened her mouth to accept, but then closed it and shook her head, "No. I actually have something I have to do."

_**AFTER SCHOOL**_

Rory bit her lip as she pulled into the parking lot of the hospital. She glanced down at the wheel, closing her eyes and shaking her head lightly before pushing the door open. She climbed out slowly and closed the door, checking to make sure it was locked...but she knew it was. She always locked it. She just needed something to take up time so that she could wait longer to go inside. Looking up at the cold steel and glass building made her stomach clench. Her mother was in there. She'd been in there for months.

Rory looked around and began walking towards the hospital slowly, not wanting to have to go inside. But she needed to see her mom. She hadn't been since the day of the accident. But she'd told herself that before she left she would visit...and here she was. The woman working at the desk told her the floor and room number of Lorelai Hayden, and too soon Rory found herself outside of the off-white door.

She bit the knuckle of her index finger and closed her eyes tightly, resting her other hand on the door. The people walking by didn't even spare her a glance. She guessed that it wasn't unusual to see someone hesitant to go inside on these rooms. Her hand slid from halfway up the door, down to the handle and she gripped it tightly before letting her finger fall from her mouth and twisting the cold metal. The handle clicked and she was able to push the heavy door open easily.

She was able to open it, but didn't want to. It slowly fell open, though, and she felt her stomach tighten as she walked into the room and clenched her fingers together, keeping her elbows straight and her arms in front of her. The room was painted a sandy color and there was a large chair sitting in one corner. A TV sat inside a cabinet across from the bed and there was a vase of flowers on a shelf below the TV. A small table with two chairs sat against the same wall as the television cabinet. On the wall across from the door was a large window with the curtains open to let the afternoon sun stream in. That made her smile. Her mother would have preferred a room with a window to one without.

And that was when her eyes fell on the woman in the bed. Her dark hair looked even richer when laid out on a white pillowcase. Her face had been covered in scratches from the wreck, but they were almost all healed and it didn't look like there would be any scarring. She tucked her own straighter, lighter hair behind her ear and pulled one of the chairs from the table over next to the bed. She slid into it slowly and clasped her hands together, staring at her mother's peaceful face. You would almost think she was sleeping, with the gentle rise and fall of her chest.

Rory bit her lip and scratched the back of her head, sniffing lightly. "Uhh, hey mom." she said quietly. "I uh, I don't really know why I'm here. I just haven't come in a while." she fell silent and looked away, swearing under her breath. This was ridiculous. She almost stood, but stopped herself. She'd said she would do this and she was going to. She looked back over at her mother. "The boys are good. Dad's been working a lot, but he needs something to do with his time now that you aren't around the house to play with him anymore." she choked on her words and swallowed the lump in her throat before continuing, and her voice cracked, "Shane broke up with his girlfriend, but that's okay cause we never really liked her. Blake and Maddy are still together though."

She inhaled deeply, what could she say in this one-sided conversation? "If I do well on my exams then I'll be in the top two percentile of my class. I'm already in National Honors Society." she looked down, "But you knew that already. Blake's been doing really well in school, though. He'd trying more this year."

She sniffed and rubbed her nose, looking around the room for some inspiration, but the walls were silent. "Um, honestly, I don't know why I came, and I don't really have anything to say other than...I ...miss you. I guess. I mean, yes, I do miss you, and I guess that's all I really have to say." she said it uncertainly, looking down at her hands, "I found out why Tristan left. It was because of me. I mean, I know you always liked him even though you pretended not to. I just figured you'd want to know why he left. You won't believe it though. It's crazy. It was because of me. He had to break up with me or leave, so he decided to leave. But that ended with us splitting up anyway, so I guess it was kind of pointless." she broke off, sniffing again.

She looked up at her mother's still form and tilted her head, "They're sending us away. Me and Blake and Shane. They're making us go to England because dad can't handle us anymore...he really misses you." she whispered the last part. "I mean, like I said, I have no idea what I'm doing here. It's just that... I feel like you're always so lonely, sitting alone in here all day. I figured you'd like some company." she was quiet. "Actually, no, you're not always alone. Grandma comes up here all the time." Rory smiled lightly, biting her lip, "She comes and just sits, watching you. She'll crochet or make phone calls or draw up menus for DAR parties. But she's always here. Five days a week. Dad come every once in a while and just watches you breathe. A few years ago he told me that right after you got married he loved to just sit and watch you breathe." she laughed lightly, "He also said that you would wake up and throw pillows at him and tell him that if you didn't love him so much you might think he was a stalker."

She touched the bed lightly, inhaling slowly, "I just...I wanted to say bye before I left." her hand slid up until her fingertips were resting on the back of her mother's hand, "Our plane leaves at five o'clock on the second." she whispered, biting her lip, "So I'll be seeing you." she choked out the last sentence before standing up and running the heel of her hand over her eyes to wipe away the tears that were forming in them but hadn't yet fallen. She laughed at herself humorlessly and shook her head before walking out the door and making her way to the car on autopilot, not really seeing anything.

_**NORTH CAROLINA**_

Tristan walked into the courtyard, his surprise and confusion still showing on his face. His three friends looked up and began asking what they had wanted. He'd been called up to the clinic because he had a phone call from home, which was surprising in itself because all of his friends from back north called his cell phone. Only his parents would have called the school, and he hadn't heard from them since he'd arrived five months ago.

He just shook his head, making his way over to them and sitting down. The other three fell silent, seeing that he was obviously confused. Kyle was the first to speak after the silence, "Well?"

Tristan looked over at him as if he didn't recognize him, "My dad called. They want me to come home for a few days."

"What?" Rick asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Yeah. I know. He's a fucking nut. They want me to go back for a week. Just a week and then they want me to come back here for the rest of the summer." he closed his eyes and rubbed his temples to soothe his splitting headache. "And then after the summer he said we'd look at my progress and talk. Fucking talk. He said he might want me to go back to Chilton for my Junior or Senior year." He looked up at the other three to see their surprised faces and he shook his head in disbelief, "He's crazy. I'm gonna call the men in white coats to come check him out. He wants to send me here for half of my Sophomore year, keep me here for a summer and then 'maybe' bring me back next school year." He continued to shake his head, "Fucking crazy."

Kyle and Stewart glanced at each other uncertainly, "Is there a reason he wants you to come back for a week?"

Tristan looked over at him, "Oh, yeah." he said as if suddenly remembering there was a reason for his going back, "My grandfather's birthday is June fifth and he's getting up there in years, so they want me to come home for a few days to visit him since I'm his favorite."

"Psh. You're his favorite?" Rick asked.

"Hell yeah I am. Everyone loves me." Tristan replied, grinning.

The other boy just rolled his eyes as Stewart spoke, all of them knowing how much their newest friend hated his father, "Mm. That'll be fun." he said sarcastically.

He shrugged, shaking his head. "I can avoid my parents all week. And the flight won't be too bad. It's only like, an hour and a half."

"When do you leave?"

He was silent for a moment, trying to remember the time. "The second. My flight's at three, so I'll get there about 4: 30."

Rick just snorted, remembering all the complaining Tristan had done about his father, "Whatever man, I don't envy you." But they all knew the reason he didn't mind going back wasn't because he suddenly like his father. No, they were all perfectly aware that he was expecting to run into a certain blue-eyed brunette.

Tristan shrugged, swallowing the lump in his throat and pushing the thought of her from his mind, "It won't be that bad." he said quietly, as if trying to convince himself. The other three just snorted, not believing him for a second.

_**When everything is wrong **_

_**We move along **_

_**Go on, go on **_

_**When everything is wrong **_

_**We move along **_

_**When all you got to keep is strong **_

_**Move along, move along like I know you do **_

_**And even when your hope is gone **_

_**Move along, move along just to make it through **_

_**Move along**_


	24. The Brilliant Dance

**A/N: I don't own '_The Brilliant Dance'_ by Dashboard Confessional.**

****

**_So this is odd _**

**_The painful realization that all has gone wrong _**

**_And nobody cares at all _**

**_So you buried all your lover's clothes _**

**_And burned the letters lover wrote _**

**_But it doesn't make it any better _**

**_Does it make it any better?_**

**_And the plaster dented from your fist _**

**_In the hall where you had your first kiss _**

**_Reminds you that the memories will fade_**

Jess and Lane paced back and forth in the upstairs apartment of the diner, racking their brains for where Rory and Blake could be. They weren't at their house. Neither of their cars were in the garage, and when they'd asked Shane if he knew where either could be, he just said that they were gone when he'd come downstairs. Paris, Madeline, Adam, and Baker had all called, but neither of them had anything to say when everyone wanted to know where the twins were.

So now they'd been in the living room of the tiny apartment for half an hour, and neither had come up with anything. The Haydens were leaving for England the next day and all of their things were packed, the only thing missing was them. Suddenly Jess stopped pacing and Lane's head snapped up, "What?" she asked, coking her head back as a thought came to her.

"I know where Rory is." he said.

Lane nodded, looking past him, out the window, "I think I know where Blake is."

Jess looked over at her, "Briscoe Park." speaking of Blake. That was the park in Hartford they'd gone when they were younger to get away from the suffocating little town. Before they could drive they'd take the bus and complain about how much they hated everything for the forty five minute ride.

She nodded again, "The amusement park." speaking of Rory. Jess grabbed the keys to Luke's truck and without a word, they both made their way out of the apartment and down the stairs to the diner. Jess held the door open for her and they each went to their cars before peeling out of the parking spots in front of the diner.

Jess pulled into the parking lot, shaded by the trees. He got out of the car and looked around, wondering where Blake could be. He made his way slowly towards the playground, but stopped half way there and turned to his right. There was a small clearing that was surrounded by trees. Few people knew it was there because it was separated from the pavilion and playground, and in order to find it you'd have to go off the paved track and through a small patch of woods. Even the frisbee golf course wouldn't take you anywhere near it. They'd found it once when they were fourteen and it had been their 'spot' ever since. The only bad thing was that it was almost an hour away form their homes.

He walked through the trees and over to his friend who was sitting with his back resting against a large oak tree. Blake knew he was there, but he didn't look up. Jess shoved his hands into his pockets and made his way over, sitting in front of him. "Hey."

"Hey." he didn't look up or say anything, so they just sat in silence. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it definitely wasn't empty. Finally, Blake spoke again, "I don't want to go." he said quietly.

Jess looked away from him, "Yeah, I know."

"I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do?" he looked up.

Jess looked back over at him and shook his head, "I don't know, man."

He pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, looking at the ground, "I love her."

"Maddy?"

"Yeah."

"I know."

"I never told her."

"I know."

"Baker and Louise split yesterday."

Jess's eyes widened, "Why?"

"Because he told her he loved her. She freaked."

"And broke it off?"

He nodded, his eyes fixed on a stick to his right. "He said she like, went crazy and got all worried and then just broke it off."

"But she loves him too."

"Yeah, I know."

Jess nodded, still trying to wrap his head around it, "You know, when you think about it, between all of us, everybody's in love...but nobody's ever said it."

"Except Rory and Tristan."

"Yeah. And look what happened to them." They both fell silent.

"I just don't want to leave." he said quietly, and Jess looked away, he didn't have anything to say.

Lane pulled into the parking lot of the amusement park Rory and Tristan had gone on for their first date...of course, they hadn't known they were going with each other. She walked over to the entrance and saw Rory sitting with her knees pulled to her chest. No one was going in or coming out at the moment, so they were alone. She walked over to her friend, who had her knees pulled to her chest. Lane knew that the twins looked a lot alike, but seeing Rory like that made her think of Blake, and they looked exactly alike. The four of them went through phases. Sometimes she was closer to Rory than she was to Blake, and sometimes she was closer to Blake. Jess went through the same thing, and for the past few months she'd been closer to Blake and Jess had been closer to Rory. But there was still something in the fact that they were 'the girls'...there was always something there that they would never have with either of the guys.

She sat next to Rory, "Hey."

"Hey." she said quietly, her voice cracking. They sat in silence as well, Lane waiting for Rory to speak. And she did after several minutes. "I don't want to go."

Lane nodded, "I know."

They were silent for a moment until Rory spoke, "This is the first place Tristan kissed me." she said quietly. Lane smiled, looking at the ground. Rory bit her lip, "This is also where I came when he moved away...and when my mom had her accident...and when they told us we were moving." she shook her head, a small smile on her face, "I don't know why."

Lane looked behind her, through the fence that enclosed the park, "Because it has good memories."

Rory nodded, tightening her grip on herself despite the heat of the afternoon, "Yeah." she was silent for a moment, "I don't have any parks with Adam." she said quietly.

Lane turned to look at her, "What do you mean?"

She shrugged, "I don't have anyplace that means anything. I don't even remember the first time he kissed me. But I can tell you exactly where I was in the park the first time Tristan kissed me. I can tell you the rides we'd been on before and after. I can tell you what outfit I had on, what he was wearing. Hell, I could tell you what earrings I was wearing." she shook her head, "It's not like that with Adam." Lane was silent, her eyes wide. Rory bit her lip, "I don't have any parks with Adam."

Lane looked away from her, "Do you love him?"

She stared at a leaf on the ground, weighing the question in her head. Finally she answered, "No."

"Do you even like him anymore?"

Rory was silent for a moment, "I think so. I mean, I did before he told me he loved me. And now that he said it, I'm not so sure if I still like him anymore. I just..." she trailed off, her eyes widening momentarily as she inhaled deeply, "...I don't know."

Lane shook her head, confused, "Then why are you still with him if you're not sure?"

"I have to have someone to occupy my time so I don't dwell on other things."

"You mean your mom?"

Rory shook her head, still staring at the leaf, "No. Not like my mom. I don't need a guy to keep my mind off of her. I could just spend time with you or Louise if I didn't want to think of her."

"Then what 'things' are you talking about?"

The corner of her lip twitched into a half smirk and she shook her head lightly, "Tristan."

Lane's head cocked back, "What?"

"I'm still not over Tristan. I tried to act like I was. I tried to hate him." She shook her head again, "I threw it all away...everything he'd given me. I tried to forget everything. I sent his clothes back to his house. I burned half of the pictures of us. The ones that I could stand to not have anymore. I wanted to hate this place because it was the first place he kissed me, but I couldn't. I can't hate this place and I can't hate him." She inhaled slowly, "It didn't work. It never works." she looked up at her friend, "Laney, I'm still in love with him."

Rory sat in the passenger seat of her brother's car, watching the trees on the side of the highway speed by. Their plane would leave in and hour and a half. She still couldn't believe that they were actually leaving. It just didn't make any sense. None of them had spoken since they'd left the house. Their grandparents had offered to come, but the kids had declined the offer. They simply didn't want them there. And their father still hadn't spoken to them. Rory ran her fingers through her hair, moving it back from her face as she curled up in her seat. She really didn't want to go.

Tristan sat on the plane, staring out at the clouds the surrounded the plane, head phones glued to his ears. At least he got a window seat. He wanted to go back, but then again he didn't. He wanted to see his friends, and then again he didn't. He wanted to see Rory, but didn't know if he could look her in the face after what he'd done. Everything would have changed by now. Even if he did wind up going home for good, he and Rory could never be like they were before. And then there was Adam. But he'd won Rory over before when she'd had a boyfriend. Of course, that had been Dean. And from what he'd heard, Adam was quite different from Dean. Adam was much more like himself.

But he didn't want to think about that, so he changed his train of thought to summer vacation. Kyle had left the day after classes ended, and Rick and Stewart were still there. Rick was at the school by court order, and Stewart was in the same position as Tristan. His parents didn't want him home. There actually weren't many guys there because of court order. The school was insanely over priced, so some of the people there because of court order couldn't afford it. Most of the kids there because of trouble with the law were rich anyway, so the courts let them decide where to send the kids. Of course it was to the number one military school in the country.

Rick wouldn't have been able to afford the school if his entire family sold all their belongings and homes. He was there because the attorney who represented him was one of the best in Atlanta, and he had only done it as a favor to Rick's grandfather. Rick was insanely smart and an amazing swimmer, so he got a double-scholarship. The school took his family situation into account and decided he deserved a full ride scholarship, and he was glad they had. He'd wanted to get out of Atlanta, but had never had the opportunity before. That was one good thing about that school, they looked at the guy as individuals. They took everything into account when people applied.

And then, for some reason, he started thinking about Mackenzie. It was a casual thing with them...well, it was a casual thing every weekend. And then whenever they would hang out with a group, they were kind of together. But the thing was, he wasn't interested in a relationship with her. That wasn't what he wanted. He didn't even really like the way they were. He wouldn't have chosen it. She had done all the chasing. Of course, he hadn't done anything to stop her. And he knew she was into him. She wanted more than he did. He knew that Rick had warned her against getting involved, but she didn't listen. Not to give the wrong impression, he wasn't complaining. It was very nice to have a friend with benefits...but things like that didn't interest him any longer.

He hadn't been able to sleep for more than an hour at a time for the past three days. The thought of seeing Rory again was killing him. He didn't know what it would be like. Would she even want to see him?

His stomach clenched as he glanced at his cell phone and saw that it was almost four. He'd been in Hartford in half an hour.

Rory's feet dragged as she moved through the airport. She hated this. They all hated this. She sighed and glanced at a large clock on the wall...it was four thirty. The airport was crowded because the first wave of vacationers was leaving for the summer. She had to hold onto Blake's belt loop so she wasn't separated from her brothers. She could see ahead that the people who were getting out of the terminals in front of them were coming in from Texas, New York, Illinois, and North Carolina. In that order, with the terminal from Texas closest and the one from North Carolina farther away. Their plane was several gates past these.

Tristan got out of the terminal and was walking through the airport. He'd been told their driver would be waiting for him at the main entrance. He was hit in the shoulder by a large man coming out of the terminal of the plane coming in from Chicago. He decided not to say anything since the guy could probably strangle him without breaking a sweat...maybe he was a bodybuilder...

The people from Texas were certainly rude. They kept running into Rory and nearly separating her from Shane and Blake, and when she didn't fall over to get out of their way, people looked at her like she was rude to be walking in their way. She couldn't wait to get out of this crowd.

Tristan didn't have any bags. About half of his clothes had been left at the house in Hartford, so he just came with what was on his back. It was a good thing too, because he wouldn't have wanted to have to get through this crowd with a bag, especially after the people coming in from New York mixed with the stampede he was in. Another man ran into him. This time the guy was smaller and balding, but Tristan just didn't care, and they fell into the crowd next to each other. It didn't help the flow of pedestrian traffic that people didn't seem to be walking to their right the way you were supposed to in a crowd. Everyone that was going the way he'd come and everyone that was going the same direction as he was were all jumbled together. Damn, he hated airports.

Rory was still shoving her way through the crowd when a man with a distinctly receding hair line ran into her. She swore and grabbed her shoulder, turning to look at him as the mass of bodies continued to push her forward.

Tristan heard someone swear and turned to see who it was, but the man next to him either hadn't heard the curse or just didn't care. When he turned, he was still moving because you can't just stop in the middle of a mob.

Rory's eyes widened as they landed on a familiar face. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't move. "Tristan?" she said quietly, letting go of Blake's belt loop to try and walk the other way, but as soon as she did Shane grabbed her arm to keep her close to them. She turned to look at her brother for a moment, but when she turned back around, he was gone.

Tristan's jaw dropped and he shook his head. Someone yelled at him to keep moving, but he ignored them and tried to push back through to the direction she was walking, but he couldn't get through with everyone pushing him.

"Are you okay Rory?" Shane asked.

She turned to look at him, "I just...I thought I saw..." she trailed off. He was gone. Maybe he hadn't really been there. She'd only seen him for a moment. Really it had been less than a second. It probably wasn't even him. She felt her shoulders droop and she exhaled slowly.

"What?"

She shook her head, "Nothing."

Tristan swore loudly and turned back to follow the flow of the crowd. Maybe it hadn't been her, but he could have sworn he saw her say his name. But it had only been for a split second that he'd seen her. She may not even have been there. Besides, she wouldn't have been there alone, and he hadn't seen anyone he recognized with her. Hell, he'd only seen her for a second. It probably wasn't her anyway. His head was playing tricks on him.

_**And the picture frames care facing down **_

_**And the ringing from this empty sound **_

_**Is deafening and keeping you from sleep **_

_**And breathing is a foreign task **_

_**And thinking's just too much to ask **_

_**And you're measuring your minutes by a clock that's blinking eights **_

_**This is incredible **_

_**Starving, insatiable **_

_**Yes, this is love for the first time **_

_**Well you'd like to think that you were invincible **_

_**Yeah, well weren't we all once **_

_**Before we felt lost for the first time**_


	25. Guernica

A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or _Guernica_ by Brand New

__

If I could I would shrink myself 

_**Sink through your skin to your blood cells **_

_**And remove whatever makes you hurt **_

_**But I am too weak to be your cure**_

Tristan looked around the dinner table at the faces of his parents. They were all three silent. As soon as he'd gotten in the maid had said that dinner was being served in the dinning room. He'd just walked in and sat at the table. His parents hadn't even said hello, and they'd been sitting like this for half an hour. He couldn't take it anymore. The only sound was forks scraping on plates and glasses being picked up and put down. He stood after they had all finished eating, "I'm going out."

His mother looked over at him, "Don't you want to stay and visit?"

He looked over at her, "Not really." and he grabbed his keys and walked out the door.

Fifteen minutes later he was standing in front of a familiar door, shuffling his feet and staring at the ground. Should he ring the doorbell? Knock? Leave? He didn't know. He'd been best friends with this girl for ten years but hadn't seen her in five months. He didn't know what to do. He scratched the back of his head and finally rang the doorbell. His eyes moved across the front yard and moments later he heard footsteps. A lock turned and the door opened, but he was still looking across the yard, not able to turn his head. He could see Paris out of the corner of his eye. Her face was emotionless and her hand stayed on the doorknob, not one muscle in her body moving. He bit his lip and his neck moved slowly until he was staring right at her. Her eyes widened slightly when they met his.

Tristan smiled sheepishly, "Hey Paris."

Her head shifted slowly to one side, her eyes never leaving his, "Tristan?"

He laughed lightly, "So then you really have known my name all these years?"

She squealed in delight, very unlike herself, and jumped into his arms, wringing her arms around his neck. He laughed, throwing his arms around her waist and picking her up off the ground. "What are you doing here?"

He set her down, "I'm in town for a few days."

Her head cocked to the side, "So then you're not staying?"

He played with a strand of hair that was falling over her shoulder and shook his head, "Nope."

She pursed her lips and folded her arms, "So why are you here?"

"My grandfather's birthday."

"Ahhh."

He nodded, "Yep."

"So, he summoned his favorite grandson home for his eighty-second birthday?"

He nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets, "You know it."

She grinned, rolling her eyes, "Want to come in?"

"Yeah." he followed her inside, "So how is everybody?"

"Jess is good. Lane and Henry are good. Louise and Baker actually broke up a few days ago, but they're back together now, and is anyone surprised?" she shook her head, and Tristan grinned as they made their way up the stairs. "And Madeline, well, she's holding up okay, I guess. Of course, I'd be broken up too if I couldn't see Jess for two months-"

He cut her off, "What are you talking about?"

She stopped walking and turned to look at him, "No one told you?"

"Told me what?" he stopped as well.

"About Rory and Blake going to England."

He shook his head, "What?"

She was silent for a moment, "Did anybody ever even tell you about Lorelai?"

Tristan's head cocked back, "Is she okay?"

"I can't believe no one told you."

He put his hands on her shoulders, "Paris, what happened?"

"Lorelai's in a coma."

His eyes narrowed, "What?"

"She was in an accident a few months ago."

"What kind of accident?"

"Car crash."

His back hit the wall and he shook his head slowly, "But why are Rory and Blake in England?"

Paris shrugged, "Chris is..." she trailed off, looking away, "...in a severe depression. He's barely spoken to them since the accident. Their grandparents decided that they needed to get out of Hartford, so they sent them to England to stay with their father's cousin for two months."

"Wow." he said quietly, running his right hand through his hair. He couldn't believe this. He was surprised, but most of all he felt guilty. She'd needed someone. He should have been there. Maybe it wasn't his job to be there for her anymore, but he still felt like he should have been. "How...how are they doing?"

She sighed, leading him into her room and closing the door, "Not well. I mean, Blake's pretty much the only thing keeping them from falling apart. It wouldn't be so bad if Chris hadn't started ignoring all of them the day Lorelai fell into a coma." she shook her head, glancing out the window, "Blake's trying to keep a strong face, but we all know he's scared shitless. Shane is going between being seriously depressed and just acting like nothing happened. And Rory..." she sighed, shaking her head sadly, "Rory's just...gone. Emotionally. Lorelai was her best friend..." she bit her lip, seemingly trying to decide if her next statement was a good thing to say or a bad one.

"What?" he asked after several moments of silence.

Paris exhaled slowly, "She feels like it's her fault."

He blinked slowly, "What? How?"

"They got into a fight and Rory left the house and went to Baker's. She was over at his house when Blake called her from the hospital." she shook her head, "She feels like her mom was mad at her and wasn't paying attention. We've tried to tell her that it wasn't her fault. But she doesn't listen." she sighed, "She's just...there. I mean, sometimes she's seems like her old self, but most of the time she's someone completely different. She hasn't been the same-" she stopped and looked over at Tristan, closing her mouth.

"She hasn't been the same since what?"

"Since you left."

Tristan shook his head, "But I thought she was with Adam."

"She is. But just to pass the time. I'm not even sure she likes him. It's not the same as it was with you. They don't laugh. They don't play as far as I can see. She's not happy. She hasn't been in a while."

He looked down, shaking his head as he changed the subject. He couldn't swallow what she'd just told him, "What were they fighting about before the accident?" Paris fell silent and she busied herself with straightening the cover on her bed. He walked over to her and put his hand over her's, stilling it. "Paris." he whispered, "I have to know."

She stopped, but didn't look at him. "You want to know the entire thing?"

"Yes."

She closed her eyes, "Her mom found birth control in her room"

"Is she having sex with Adam?"

She didn't look up at him, "No." He closed his eyes and swore under his breath. "Yeah. She told me, Lane, and Madeline after you left."

"What happened after she found it?"

"She asked Rory if she was sleeping with Adam, and Rory told her no. So then she asked if it was you, and you know that girl can't lie to save her life, especially to her mom."

Tristan sat on the bed heavily, rumpling the sheets Paris had just made perfect, and he rested his head in his hands, "What did her mom say?" She didn't answer, simply walked over to her closet and began straightening the rows of clothes. "Paris." he said firmly.

"It's not important."

"Paris, I know she hates me anyway. What did she say?"

She shook her head, "They just got into a fight. And Rory stormed out-"

He cut her off, "Paris."

The blonde girl bit her lip, not looking at him, "She asked if you forced her."

His mouth opened slightly and he blinked, unable to speak for a moment, "What?"

She swallowed heavily, "Lorelai asked Rory if you forced her into it. That was the main reason for the fight." she walked over to him, squatting in front of him, "Rory would defend you no matter what. She's different now, but she's still Rory." Tristan looked up and she could see that he was hurting.

"I should have been here." he whispered.

She shook her head, "You couldn't have known. You did everything you could for her."

He looked towards the ceiling, "No matter what I do, I can't stop her from hurting." he whispered.

Paris smiled, resting her chin on his knee, "You've done all you can. She knows that."

He looked up at her, "So then she's different now?"

She nodded, "Yeah. She's different."

Tristan shook his head, looking away from her, "I shouldn't have left in January, but I couldn't tell her what was going on."

Paris shrugged, "Things may have been worse if you stayed. I mean, now she knows why you left, but things still might have been worse." he just sighed laying back on the bed. She crawled up next to him. "She misses you, you know."

He looked over at her, "What?"

"Rory. She misses you. She doesn't hate you like you think she does." He looked up towards the ceiling, sighing heavily. He didn't believe her.

Neither of them moved. He just stared at the ceiling, and she just stared at him.

**NEXT DAY**

Paris entered Baker's basement, followed closely by Tristan. When he came in, the room fell silent. The six teenagers in the room all stared at him in shock and disbelief. Tristan wanted to bite his lip, but seventeen years of etiquette classes, cotillion, and dinner parties wouldn't let him; despite the fact that these were some of his closest friends. Finally after a few beats of silence, Baker stood and walked over to him, hitting knuckles with him and pulling him into a manly hug. Everyone else was immediately relaxed and they all greeted him...except for Louise. He noticed that all night she didn't look at him or acknowledge him.

They stayed over for a few hours. It was Paris, Jess, Lane, Henry, Louise, Baker, Madeline, and himself. The twins were in England and Adam was visiting family in Texas, so Tristan wouldn't get a chance to meet the guy that had stolen Rory's heart.

But he watched his friends. They were different. It was obvious their relationships had changed. Some people were closer, some people had obviously had issues. There was so much that he didn't know. There was so much that he'd missed. And it was obvious that there were people missing. There were gaps. He watched his friends interact, and for a little while he blocked out Jess and Lane. They'd all changed so much. It was hard to even remember what they were like before Rory and Blake had come to Chilton and Jess and Lane had come into the picture. What had they done in their spare time? He remembered that he'd always had fun, but had never been very happy before he met the Hayden twins. And when he thought about it, nothing was the same. He was so intertwined with the four teenagers from Stars Hollow that he couldn't imagine not knowing them.

Jess and Blake had become two of his closest friends. Hell, they'd gotten bloody noses and black eyes fighting for each other. Before he met these people he'd never gotten in a fight defending anyone's name but his own. The only other guy in Hartford who he came close to feeling that brotherhood with was Baker. He was friends with Lane, but she was closer to Madeline and Henry than anyone else in Hartford. And then there was Rory. She'd been something completely different. The only girl he'd ever felt love for was Paris, and she was like his sister. Rory had been what brought him to life. He'd become so involved with them, he would never have been able to go back to his life before.

He watched Paris. It didn't surprise him that she'd fallen so easily in with the kids from Stars Hollow. That was something they'd always had in common...they didn't fit in with society. Not that they didn't look like they belonged or couldn't play the part. That wasn't it at all. They just weren't comfortable in their own skin. But once they'd gotten involved with Jess and the Haydens, that had changed for him...and he could tell that she was different too.

But he was pulled from his musings when Baker sat next to him and started talking to him about how the soccer team had done last season while he was gone. They'd been the starting wings on varsity their freshmen year, and if Tristan had stayed the coach was convinced they would have been able to go to the regional game. As it was, the other starting wing was a junior that had never been able to catch up with either of them, but he was the third best wing the team had. Not that he was a bad player. He was actually really good. They were just better. Not something they talked about a lot. They didn't like bragging, contrary to popular belief.

He stood and walked out to the hall, wanting to get his mind around everything, and he was surprised when Louise slipped out of the room as well. She closed the door behind herself and turned to glare at him. He stared back at her. Okay, so she was pissed. He could see that. So he shoved his hands into his pockets and waited for her to speak. She pursed her lips and crossed her arms tight over her chest, her hip pushed out. She looked like she was in a freaking magazine advertisement.

And they stood in silence, their eyes locked, Louise shaking her head lightly. So it was a battle of wills. Well, she was the one who was pissed, so she was definitely going to loose. He was about to get bitched out and wasn't going to say anything that would bring it on before he had to hear it.

She sighed, finally unfolding her arms. "What the hell are you doing here?"

He laughed lightly, surprised, "What?"

"Why are you here?"

"I have every right to be here, babe. I live here too."

She rolled her eyes, "Yeah."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Louise looked over at him, "You haven't come back in six months and suddenly here you are and you expect us to just welcome you back and act like nothing's changed!"

"It wasn't my choice to be gone for six months. You think I didn't want to come home? Do you fucking know me?"

She shook her head, "You still expect us to just act like nothing's changed."

"Wrong. I never said anything about asking you guys to act like nothing's different. I know things have changed, but you're the only one who's pissed that I'm here. I thought we were pretty good friends Louise, but apparently you don't even fucking want me here!"

She shook her head, looking away, "I never said that."

"Then what the hell is this about?"

She looked back at him, tapping her foot to level her anger as she shook her head, "You hurt her so bad, Tristan."

He started to shake his head slowly. He took a step back, running his hands through his hair, "Don't fucking start this, Louise. I cannot deal with this right now." he started to walk away, but she followed him and they moved away from the door.

"Why? That's all I want to know. Why did you have to hurt her?"

He turned and she stopped abruptly, surprised, "What? I fucking hurt her? Don't bitch me out cause you don't know the whole story, Louise."

"Then tell me."

He turned and started walking again, "No."

She followed him and grabbed his elbow, turning him around, "Yes! Tell me!"

"You think I wanted to leave? You think I fucking chose to leave her? If killed me. Fucking killed me, Louise!"

She shook her head, "Rory deserves to know!"

"Well are you Rory? No? Then it's none of your fucking business, is it!" he turned to walk away from her again. He couldn't deal with this. Being back here just made it ten times worse. It made him remember...everything. It hadn't been a good idea to come back.

She followed him, "She needed you!"

Tristan spun around, fire streaking under his skin, "I fucking needed her!" Louise stopped, surprised. But Tristan kept going, "I needed her too, but does anyone fucking care that I didn't want to leave? Does anybody fucking ask me whether I was hurt!" He inhaled shakily and shook his head, "She seems to have moved on pretty well anyway."

She looked away, realizing that she'd hurt him rather than just pissed him off, "Adam's a good guy."

Tristan snorted, "Yeah. I wouldn't expect Rory to pick anything less."

"Don't be a smartass."

"Well let's be honest, she doesn't seem to pick good guys."

"Don't be so hard on yourself. You're a dick, but you're not a bad guy."

He rolled his eyes, "Thanks. I feel so much better."

She crossed her arms, "I didn't mean to be a bitch." he just cocked one eyebrow. She pursed her lips, "Fine, maybe I did."

Tristan snorted, "Yeah."

Louise bit her bottom lip, "So then you were hurt too?"

Tristan looked away from her, "Yeah."

"What-"

He cut her off, "I don't want to talk about it."

She nodded, "Okay."

His phone started to ring. He fished it out of his pocket and glanced at it. She nodded, walking back into the room as he walked slowly up the stairs and answered the call.

That night Tristan sat in his room, fully dressed in his desk chair, staring at the blank wall. The last time he'd looked at the clock it was three twenty-six in the morning. He couldn't believe this. It just didn't make any sense. Why did something as bad as this have to happen when he left? He sighed, resting his head in his hands. And now she was gone. The whole reason he'd agreed to come on this stupid trip had been to see her. He needed to talk to her. Tell her the truth. Just see her. Or if not her, he needed to at least see Adam to make sure he was good enough for Rory, but he didn't even get that satisfaction.

He shook his head, running his hands through his hair. He was missing it. All of it. He was missing everything good that was going on. Everything that made up life, all the little everyday things that make people who they are, those were the things he was missing out on with his closest friends. He didn't know why Lane and Louise seemed to be steering clear of each other...couldn't even begin to guess what had cause Louise and Baker to split and then get back together...didn't really know the details or exactly what had cause Rory and Lorelai to fight, or why Rory and Baker were suddenly close enough that she would go to his house when she was upset. He was missing out on the best times of their lives.

And all the talk they'd done about how this was going to be the best summer any of them had ever had. They'd made numerous plans, but all knew that less than half of them would actually be carried out. The beach...concerts...amusement parks...camping...a road trip...several things that they'd been drunk while discussing and no one could remember. But it didn't matter anyway. None of it was going to happen, not for him at least. And probably not for the others either, considering the twins were gone.

He glanced at the clock once more...four seventeen. He needed to get to bed. He had to figure out what he was going to do.

**ENGLAND**

Rory stared out the window of her aunt's kitchen, drinking coffee slowly and watching eight year old Taylor run around the front yard with his friends. Their father's cousin and her family lived in the country. There were fifteen families within three miles of each other and they were more than twenty miles from the nearest real town or city. There was a gas station with a small grocer behind it and that was it for miles. Blake walked in, scratching the back of his head, his eyes heavy with sleep. Rory smiled into her mug, "Morning sleeping beauty."

"Mmm." he walked over to the pantry and pulled out a Pop-Tart before pouring himself coffee.

Rory took a bite out of her own pastry, "Keiran wants us to go out with him tonight when he gets back from work." she told him, referring to their cousin.

"Mmm." he pulled one of the Pop-Tarts out and ate half of it in one bite.

She rolled her eyes, "That's attractive." He smiled at her and opened his mouth. Her nose wrinkled and she narrowed her eyes, "You're disgusting."

He laughed and took a sip of his coffee, "Okay. I'll go if you want to."

She shrugged, "What else are we going to do?"

Blake nodded, "Where do they go?"

"He said it was some all ages club with live music."

"Good music?"

"Good question."

He shrugged, "We might as well go."

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking."

Shane walked in, his hair not yet dry from the shower. Blake turned to look at him, "So how are you liking Sheila?" he asked, referring to their cousin who was now thirteen, a year younger than him.

He shrugged, "She's nice."

"Are you meeting any of her friends?"

He shrugged his shoulders again and got out a mug. Blake handed the pot to him. "She asked if I wanted to go to the movies with some of her friends tomorrow night."

"Are you going?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

"What about Ian?" Rory asked, referring to their fifteen year old cousin.

Shane took a deep drink of coffee, "He asked if I wanted to go to some show tonight that some of his friends are playing in."

"What kind of show?"

He shrugged again, "They're in a band, I guess. At some all ages place."

Rory glanced over at her twin, "Do you think it's the same place?"

"As what?" Shane asked.

Blake looked over at him, "Keiran asked us if we wanted to go out with him tonight to an all ages club. Him and his friends go there cause there's live music."

Shane shook his head, "I don't think it's the same. Ian mentioned that the same people own the club that Keiran goes to, but they're two different buildings."

"Hmm." Rory sat back and folded her arms as she glanced out the window. Maybe England wouldn't be so bad after all.

**TWO DAYS LATER**

Tristan walked down the stairs and onto the crowded main floor of his uncle's house. It was his grandfather's eighty second birthday party, and it looked as if all of Hartford had shown up for the event. He had very little trouble making his way through the sea of people and finding his grandfather. The small old man was the center of energy. He always had been, always would be. Just because he was into his eighth decade didn't for a moment mean that he was losing any of his charm or personality.

He walked over to his grandfather and the old man kissed his favorite grandson on each cheek, clapping him on the shoulders. "Tristan, my boy. How are you?"

"I'm well, grandpa, and yourself?"

"Marvelous. I'm trying to convince your grandmother to go on a biking trip with me next month." Tristan laughed as his grandparents looked at each other, his grandmother giving her husband a disapproving look. "She doesn't want to. She's afraid I'll wear her out."

"Janlan Dugrey, you are too much for yourself. You're going to give yourself a heart attack, and when you die I will never forgive you."

He shook his head, "I can't die. You know that."

She shook her head as well, "Too stubborn to die."

Janlan nodded towards his grandson, "Where do you think this one gets it from?"

She smiled at her grandson and gave him a warm hug, "I'm so glad you could come home,  
Tristan."

"Whatever happened to that girl?"

Tristan looked over at his grandfather, "What girl?"

"The girl you were with at the end of last year? Rory? I liked her."

"Oh. We broke up when I left for school." his grandfather shook his head, and Tristan felt a bony hand land forcefully on the back of his head. "Ow!" he cringed and held the back of his head. For a frail old man, he could really pack a punch. "What?"

"Never let the good ones go, son." he nodded towards his wife, "Do you know how long it took me to convince this one to marry me?"

He continued rubbing the back of his head, "How long?"

"Two years. I proposed six times."

His eyes widened, "Are you serious?"

She shook her head, "I liked you too much to marry you. I told you that, but you insisted, and look at us now."

"Still fighting after fifty eight years." he smiled and kissed her lightly.

She sighed, looking at her grandson dramatically, "I'll never be able to tame him."

Tristan laughed, but his grandfather got his attention back, "Like I said boy, never let the good ones go. No matter how hard it is. She was a good one."

Tristan shook his head, "I know."

"Where is she now?"

He inhaled heavily, "England."

Janlan was silent for a moment, "Why?"

"She's the daughter of Christopher and Lorelai Hayden."

His grandfather's eyes widened, "Richard's girl, Lorelai?"

"Yes."

"I see. Have you talked to her since the accident?"

"No." again, the old man's hand found the back of his head.

"Call her."

"But-"

He cut him off, "Call her." he gave him a meaningful look, "Never let the good ones go."

**FOUR DAYS LATER**

Tristan sat on the edge of Paris's bed, rolling her hairbrush between his hand distractedly. She was walking around, tidying the bookshelves, despite the fact that they were perfectly set up. "So then you and Louise are good?" she asked, not looking at him.

He nodded, but then realized she couldn't see him, "Yeah, we're good."

"You made up?"

"Yeah. We talked Wednesday."

She nodded, turning to face him, "Oh. That's good." he just nodded, looking back down at his hands. She exhaled heavily, "So what time is your flight?"

"Three."

She nodded, "So then you need to get to the airport at about two?"

"Yeah."

She nodded, silently, "Two hours."

He nodded, "Yeah." They dat in silence for several minutes, both staring at the wall or the floor. "I'm coming back."

Paris's head whipped around, "What?"

"I'm coming home. I'm going to come back for good."

"You dad told you?"

He shook his head, "No...but I am."

"How do you know?"

He shook his head, "I just do. I have to come back."

She kneeled in front of him, "So you're definitely coming back?"

"I am."

"Swear it."

He looked her in the eye, "I swear it."

"But don't say it unless you mean it."

He got off the bed and lowered himself so that he was at her level, "I swear it, Paris. Have I ever lied to you?"

She smiled, biting her lip slowly, "You swear?"

He nodded again, "I'm coming home this year."

She smiled and threw her arms around his neck, strangling him. She never let her guard down with anyone...even Jess or Rory. Anyone, that is, except for Tristan.

**NEXT DAY**

Rory was sitting in the basement with Blake, Keiran, and Keiran's friends. She and his girlfriend Rachel, a tiny thing with short blonde hair, had hit it off wonderfully. Besides the four of them, there were four other guys and two other girls. The girls were named Callista and Margo, but she didn't like them. As soon as she'd made her dislike of them known, Rachel and Keiran had told her that the only reason they even kept the two around was because they were easy and the other four guys didn't like to have to work too hard when they were drunk. They reminded her of Summer. She liked the guys, though. There was Landon, the stoner, Julian, the designated driver, Nick, the idiot who would do anything to make you laugh, and Trevor, who refused to leave her alone no matter how often she told him she had a boyfriend.

At the moment, Nick and Blake were messing with the stereo in the corner of the room, Callista and Margo were whispering in the corner and giggling, Julian and Keiran were playing pool, and she and Rachel were sitting on the couch watching them play. Oh, and Trevor was practically sitting on top of her. She was just about to turn around and push him off the couch when the basement door opened. She looked up to see her aunt walking in. All the friends waved to her, and she smiled in return. She was one of those mothers that your friends liked. She reminded Rory of her own mother, and had to wonder why her father never liked his cousin.

"Rory, a letter came for you." She held her hand out and Rebakah dropped the envelope into it. Rory looked down at it, her eyes narrowed. "So who's staying for supper?" Instantly all four of the visiting boys yelled 'me' in unison. She rolled her eyes, "It'll be ready in an hour." and she made her way upstairs.

But Rory wasn't paying any attention. She was examining the envelope. Her name and address were in a familiar handwriting she couldn't quite place, but there was no return address. "Who's it from, Ror?" her brother asked from across the room. She shook her head, showing she didn't know. But when she turned it over she saw a return address printed on the back flap. There was no name, only an address. A familiar address. Blake walked over and saw her eyes narrowed, "Rory?"

Everyone in the room was looking at her, but she wasn't paying them any attention. She just looked up at her brother, a disbelieving look on her face as she shook her head slowly, "1839 Mont Park Road."

He stood silent for a moment, the address was obviously familiar, he was just having trouble placing it. After a few seconds the twins' gazes met and Blake's eyes narrowed, his head cocking back in surprise as recognition came to him "Tristan?"

_**Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these **_

_**So I sat alone and waited out the night **_

_**The best part of what has happened was the part I must have missed **_

_**So I'm asking you to shine it on and stick around **_

_**I'm not writing my goodbyes**_


	26. Ruthless

_A/N: I know, freakishly fast update...two updates within 72 hours of each other...this from a girl who goes months without updating...yeah, I don't know what happened. It's kina the middle of the night and I'm pumped with caffeine, and am supposed to be waking up in a few hours...but whatever...I think this chapter is alright, but I'm really not tired at all and as soon as I post this I'm gonna start on the next one...geez, I'm such a dork )._

I don't own Gilmore Girls or _Ruthless _by Something Corporate.

**This is the only lonely picture **

**Waiting on my floor, littering my shore **

**This is the last true burning letter **

**Written by a boy **

**Given to a girl **

**Living in a world created to destroy **

**But if I built you a city **

**Would you let me?**

**Would you tear it down?**

Rory sat on the couch, staring at the letter in her hand in disbelief. They were all looking at her uncertainly, wondering who Tristan was. She looked up at her brother slowly, "Why would he write me?" she looked down at the envelope, "And why is it his home address instead of the one in North Carolina?"

Blake was silent for a moment, "Have you talked to anyone this week?"

"Jess, Lane, and Paris."

"And no one told you he was home for a visit?"

"What?" she stood up quickly from her place on the couch, causing Trevor to jump in surprise, "As in he's in Hartford?"

"Well, not anymore. He'll be on a plane back to school by now."

She looked at her brother, shaking her head, "How long was he home for?"

"A week. Janlan turned eighty two."

"I can't believe no one told me." she looked over at him, "I can't believe you didn't tell me."

He shrugged, "I figured you knew and that you didn't want to talk about it."

She shook her head, closing her eyes and running a hand over her face, "I don't even know if I want to read it."

"I think you should. Maybe he has something useful to say."

She just gave him a look, "He should have said something useful back in January when he left. All he said was that shit happens and he didn't need a girlfriend, and then he left." She fell silent and the twins just stared at each other.

"I'm just saying, he didn't want it."

Rory looked away from him, "I know. Paris told me."

They looked at each other in silence, forgetting that the others were in the room until Nick spoke, "Okay, so just to clarify for the rest of us, who's Tristan?"

Rory didn't look away from her brother, "Ex-boyfriend."

"Ahh." Nick said quietly, understanding.

Rory shook her head, glancing down at the envelop before leaving the room. Everyone just looked around at each other, unsure of what they should do. Blake looked at Rachel, who bit her lip and stood, following the other girl. He exhaled heavily, swearing under his breath, "This isn't gonna go well."

Rory was on the back porch, her face void of emotion as she looked out over the wooded back yard. Rachel opened the back door slowly, stepping outside once she spotted her new friend. She walked over slowly, her arms crossed over her chest. "Hey."

Rory didn't look at her, "Hey." They fell silent, and Rory shook her head, closing her eyes. She couldn't believe this was happening.

"So..." Rachel trailed off, looking over towards the back yard as well. "Tristan would be...?"

Rory slid down the wall until she was sitting with her knees pressed against her chest. "The bane of my existence."

Rachel smiled, sitting as well, "So then it was love?" Rory nodded slowly, her gaze not breaking from the backyard. "First?"

"Only."

"What happened?"

Rory was silent for a moment, resting her chin on her knees. She wrapped her arms around her knees, the envelope still clutched in her hand, "He went to Military School halfway down the east coast."

"Then how did you meet him?"

She looked over at her, "What? Oh." Rory shook her head, "He went to my school, but then got sent to Military School."

"Oh. Why?"

Rory looked back over at the front lawn, shaking her head, "It's so stupid." she inhaled deeply, "His parents hated me, but he wouldn't break up with me, so they sent him off."

Rachel's eyes widened, "Are you serious?"

Rory nodded, "Apparently his dad said something about me and Tristan went off on him." She shook her head, "It's the most pointless things I've ever seen. I mean, the whole reason they hated me was because they hated my parents." she looked over at Rachel, "Is that not ridiculous?"

"That they sent him off just for dating you? Yes." she was silent for a moment, "So then if he'd have broken up with you he wouldn't have been sent away?" Rory shook her head silently. "Did he know that?" She nodded. "I'm impressed he didn't."

She laughed lightly, "We have a mutual best friend named Paris and he told her that he couldn't stay in Hartford if he wasn't with me. He told her he couldn't be around me but not be able to be with me."

Rachel smiled, "That's really sweet."

Rory snorted lightly, shaking her head, "I wish he would have." she looked over at the blonde girl next to her, "I mean, we could've figured something out, you know? Now he's gone and I haven't seen him in six months." she looked down at the envelope in her hands, "I haven't heard from him since he left."

She chewed on her bottom lip, uncertain of what to say. "Was it hard for him to tell you that?"

Rory didn't look up at her, "He didn't tell me. Paris did. All he said was that he didn't need a girlfriend and then he left."

Rachel inhaled deeply, "Did you sleep with him?"

The brunette smiled humorlessly, "He was my first for everything." Rachel wasn't surprised. Relationships changed after sex got involved.

"How long after it happened did he leave?"

Rory tightened her grip on her legs, "Three weeks."

Rachel let out a low whistle, "Wow."

"Yeah, and it didn't help that he wouldn't tell me why he was breaking up with me."

"You thought he used you?"

She nodded slowly, "Yeah. And it didn't help that he had a reputation."

"Ah. I know those kind of guys."

"Yeah." Rory laughed lightly, "But he really was different. He really did love me."

They sat in a comfortable silence, Rachel looking down at the ground while Rory chewed on her bottom lip. "You still love him." she stated quietly.

Rory nodded, "Terribly."

"If you don't mind me asking, then why are you with Adam?"

She pursed her lips, shrugging, "He keeps me occupied. Keeps my mind off of Tristan." Rachel nodded, looking out into the darkening evening sky. The only sound apart from the crickets was their even breathing. "Did you lose your virginity to Keiran?"

Rachel nodded slowly, still looking at the sky, "On my sixteenth birthday."

Rory looked over at her, "Me too."

She looked over at her, "What?"

"The first time I slept with Tristan was on my sixteenth birthday."

Rachel smiled, "That's crazy."

She nodded, "So then you'd been dating for a year?"

"Yep."

"How did you get together?"

She shrugged, "We'd been friends for a while, but he was a year ahead of me in school so we didn't see each other all that much. But when we got older we just started hanging around each other more." She nodded towards the road, "I mean, when you only have fifteen families within half an hour of the closest town you get to know each other pretty well. We just decided to start dating right after he turned sixteen and right before I turned fifteen."

"And you've been together ever since?"

"We broke up once, but it was only two months before we got back together." She looked over at Rory and shrugged, "I love him."

She nodded, "Yeah, I know."

They were quiet for a moment before Rachel spoke, "So are you going to read the letter?"

Rory sighed and looked down it, "I don't know."

Rachel touched her shoulder, "I think you should. It doesn't really sound like you ever really got any closure. Maybe it could help."

Rory looked down at her hands, chewing on her bottom lip, "Maybe it could."

**THAT NIGHT**

Rory sat in the room she was staying in while at her relative's house. Rebekah's house was as large as their own. This place may have been rural, but it was expensive. All wealthy families. Each of the Hayden children got their own rooms while visiting, and each of Rebekah's children had their own room. A lot of rooms in one house, to say the least.

All of Keiran's friends had left half an hour ago, and she'd been sitting at the desk in her room for nearly twenty minutes, just staring at the envelope. Her breathing was still shaky...she couldn't seem to get it under control. She was flustered, her hands moving all around, blinking rapidly as her head continued to look around the room. Why was she so scared? It was just a letter. He was just a boy. It shouldn't have been a big deal.

She bit her lip and ran her fingers over the envelope lightly before picking it up. Part of her wanted to just hold it, part of her wanted to throw it away, and part of her wanted to put it through a paper shredder, drench it in gas, and let it burn. But she knew she'd regret the latter two.

And so, unimaginably slow, she slid her finger under the right corner of the back flap and tore through the top of the seal. The tips of her fingers found the folded sheet of paper and she pulled it out slowly, unfolding it.

His handwriting was still the same...a hurried scrawl, but she smiled and noted that he'd tried to make it neat. It was legible, but only if you were very good at reading messy handwriting. It'd been hell borrowing his notes when she'd missed days in school. She bit her lip and inhaled heavily, closing her eyes before looking at the first line. _Mary..._ Oh, the nerve of him. She moved onto the next line. _I know you'll be immensely pissed that I called you that._ At least he knew it.

_Mary,_

_I know you'll be immensely pissed that I called you that, but I guess I've just been pissing you off a lot. And I know you probably had a long debate with yourself about wether you should burn this or read it. I wouldn't have blamed you for doing the first._

_I'd guess Lane or Paris told you I was visiting, but if they didn't, I came home for a week per my grandfather's request. It's his eighty-second birthday and I'm his favorite, so he wanted to see me. He asked about you, by the way. He always liked you. Anyway, I'm not going to tell you how sorry I am and how stupid I was for ending it with you because I know that would just bore you. It wouldn't matter anyway because there's nothing we can do about it now. I know Paris told you why I left, and that's what I'm apologizing for. I should have been the one to tell you, but I couldn't. And I know it was even worse because it had only been a few weeks since your birthday. Now you understand that didn't have anything to do with me ending it, but if I'd have told you it would've saved you a lot of pain, so I am sorry for that._

_I'm also sorry that I haven't called you or contacted you before now. I know I should have. That was wrong on my part. And I know you know that I've talked to everyone else. But I want you to believe what Paris told you I said. I had to do this, and it may have been selfish and immature on my part, but it's what I had to do. When I said that I couldn't live here and not be with you I was being completely honest. Since I met you I haven't been able to not be with you. It drives me insane, as you may have noticed before we got together and the time we broke up. And long distance would have never worked for us, you know that. We had enough trouble keeping it together when we saw each other everyday. Not that that's a bad thing...we kept it interesting. _

_Part of the reason I agreed to come home was because I was hoping for a chance to talk to you. I was also hoping for a chance to meet the guy whose stolen your heart, but I didn't get to do either. I just wish I could see you face to face to tell you this. I didn't do right by you when I left and I wish I could make up for it now, but I can't. If you want to hate me then you can, but I just needed to know that you heard something from me rather than everyone else. I know a lot of people told you not to get involved with me and that I'd only hurt you, and I guess in the end they were right. But I honestly never meant to. I wanted to do all of this in the least painful way for you that I could. But the whole reason all of this had happened is because we can't be together._

_I hope this letter isn't painful for you. I would hate to still be hurting you. Leaving you in Briscoe Park was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, and I hope you won't hate me for it. All the things I've done have been to make it less painful for you, but nothing I've done has helped any. I told you once that I would do anything to stop you from hurting, and it's still true. I know that you don't trust me anymore and I doubt you ever will again, but I would still do anything for you. I told you I would go through hell for you and I will, but I won't ask you to forgive me for everything._

_Don't respond to this letter. I just had to write it. I needed you to get something from me so you know that I still think about it. I know you loved me, and I don't want you to think that I didn't feel the same, or that it didn't bother me when I left. _

_But the main reason I'm writing this is because I don't want you to regret. In the end we both wound up hurt and out of control, but to me it was worth it. I don't want you to regret being with me or letting me in. I don't want you to think it didn't mean anything to me and that as soon as I left I stopped caring. You were my first love, and the first person that I ever let in, and I will never regret that._

_Tristan_

Rory inhaled deeply, chewing on her bottom lip. The letter didn't upset her, surprisingly. She expected to cry or scream, or hate him more than she already did. But she didn't. If anything, she was relieved. In a way, it was closure.

She inhaled slowly, looking over the letter again. She just couldn't forget about him. Every time she tried to occupy herself, the though of him came back to her. And then she was a little mad. Mad that he said he'd still do anything for her. It wasn't fair. He couldn't do that anymore.

She looked out the window at the dark sky, sighing deeply. It didn't matter, though. It didn't look as if she'd see him again any time soon.

**I'll raise towers and climb them **

**Rivers and walk them **

**Oceans to drown in **

**You won't make a sound in **

**But there you go for the last time **

**I finally know now what I should have known then **

**And I can still be ruthless if you let me **

**But there you go when I'm not done **

**You're waving goodbye **

**Well at least you're having fun **

**The rising tide will not let you forget me**


	27. It Hurts

**A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or _It Hurts_ by Angels & Airwaves**

**Every little kiss and grin you gave **

**Was just a little bullshit I saw through **

**The alcohol is scented with your breath **

**You're always all done up to just be used **

**I'm waiting for excuses that deceive **

**I'll meet you in the back to see them through **

**How did I let her inside?**

**We're dripping of sweat, I'm feeling alright **

**Her lips were the last thing touched tonight **

**Your best friend is not your girlfriend **

**It hurts **

**It hurts **

**It hurts**

Tristan walked into the terminal, shoving his hand into his back pocket to make sure he had money for a cab. He couldn't believe he'd written her a letter. They hadn't spoken in six months and he'd had to write her a fucking letter. He was so stupid. It would have all blown over...he was going home eventually and he could see her then...but she probably wouldn't want to. Better to have her bitch him out in person than think he was pitiful for writing a letter like that. It didn't really matter anyway, he'd said not to respond and she wouldn't. Even if he'd asked her to he didn't think she would have. He closed his eyes tightly, running his hand over his face, where was the exit? His mind was so occupied he didn't remember.

"Dugrey!" he turned when he heard his name, and fifty feet away he saw his friends. He grinned, almost forgetting about Rory for a moment. Rick, Stewart, and Mackenzie were there. He made his way over, hitting knuckles with the two boys and giving the girl a hug.

"What are you doing here?"

"We came to pick you up. How did you plan on getting back to school?" Stewart asked.

"Cab."

"Psh." Rick rolled his eyes, "We figured we'd come pick you up and spend the day in the city."

Tristan glanced around and wrapped his arm around Kenzie's shoulder, "Alright."

_**ENGLAND, ONE MONTH LATER**_

Rory sat on the hood of Keiran's car, Rachel next to her while Callista and Margo had spread out a sheet and were laying on the ground. Keiran, Blake, Landon, Nick, Julian, and Trevor were all kicking around a soccer ball. The five guys were thrilled that now that they had Blake, their teams were finally even. Rory watched them, drinking her water slowly as they ran around the large field in the back of Julian's property. He had a lot of property, though. They'd had to drive nearly five minutes to get to the spot they were at, and there was nothing in sight other than the woods on the other side of the field.

Rachel was scanning through the pictures on Rory's phone, "So then this-" she turned to screen towards Rory, "-is Tristan?"

"Mm-hm."

"And you dated for what? Five months?"

"Four."

"Whirlwind romance."

She nodded, smiling lightly, "Tell me about it."

"Do you think he'll come home?"

Rory shook her head, "No. And even if he does, we could never be like we were."

Rachel smiled at her, "Rory, you can always go back."

She sighed, shaking her head, "I really wish I could, but I don't think so."

"That's too bad."

She nodded, "Yeah."

_**NORTH CAROLINA**_

Tristan sat on Mackenzie's bed, watching her reflection as she brush her hair while sitting at her vanity. She was absentmindedly singing along with the song playing on her stereo as she stared into space. He swore under his breath, looking away from her, "Mackenzie."

She turned to look at him, "Hmm?"

He exhaled slowly, turning to look at her as well, "I can't do this anymore."

Her head cocked back, slightly surprised, "What?"

"I can't do this." he shook his head slowly motioning between them, "I just...can't."

Her mouth opened slightly, at a loss for words, "Why?"

He bit in insides of his cheeks, standing up from the bed, "I don't know." he looked over at her, "I'm still not over my ex-girlfriend, you know that."

She blinked rapidly, swallowing hard, "I thought she wasn't there when you went home."

"She wasn't." he sighed, "Look, Kenzie, I like you, I do. And if I hadn't been with Rory I would've asked you out by now. But I can't. She's ruined me for anyone else." he walked over to her. "You're one of my closest friends," he shook his head slowly, squatting down to eye level with her, "But I know you want more than that." she looked away, shaking her head as she visibly held back tears. He touched her knee gently, "I know you do, because if you didn't then this wouldn't bother you so much. Kink, I've been wrong. I know that. You don't deserve this." she sniffed lightly, looking down at him. "You deserve somebody that can care about you in a way that I can't."

Mackenzie bit her lip, looking away from him as she shook her head, rolling her eyes, "And here I did think you cared about me."

"I do." he said quickly, turning her head so that she was forced to look at him, "I do, but not in any way that will make you happy. I care about you in a platonic way, and you deserve someone that will feel more for you. You need someone who will treat you well, because I know I haven't."

She laughed humorlessly, "It's not all your fault. I let it get this far." she turned to look at him,  
"But I really wanted to be with you."

He felt his stomach knot guiltily, "I know."

Mackenzie shook her head, "Don't beat yourself up over it. I knew you didn't want a relationship. I knew it before any of this started."

"But why are you so okay with it?"

She smiled lightly, patronizingly to herself, "Because even though it was a no strings attached thing, I was still with you."

He leaned back slightly, unsure of what to say. He'd had plenty of people allow him to treat them like shit just so that they could be around him...but he never cared about them. He actually cared about Mackenzie, and couldn't believe that a girl as strong as her would allow someone to treat her badly just so she could be with them. Hell, he hadn't even treated her badly. He treated her the way he would any close friend. He was always respectful to her in the same way he was to all women and girls. But he'd never been romantic towards her. They both knew that. No courtship. The only physical affection he showed her was between the bed sheets. And she deserved more.

Mackenzie watched him as he reacted to her confession. But God, she was dying inside. She really liked him, maybe even loved him. She'd talked to Rick, and knew for a fact that they'd had this...relationship or whatever the hell it was for longer than he'd been with that girl. It was like she was willing to do whatever she had to in order to be with him, and he didn't even care. Everything he'd said...she knew he cared for her, but she'd made herself believe it was more. It wasn't even like he tried to convince her, she just tried to make herself believe any of this mattered to him.

They sat in silence for several minutes...neither had anything to say. She pecked him on the lips chastely and stood up so that Tristan wouldn't see the pained look on her face, but he didn't move from his position on the floor. She walked over to the bathroom attached to her bedroom and grabbed a hair band to pull her brunette locks back from her face, "So...tell me about this girl."

Rory sat on the back patio with Blake, Rachel, and Keiran that night, watching the stars. They were going back in two weeks. Strangely, she didn't want to leave. When she'd first arrived, this had been the last place in the world she wanted to be...now she was sure she was going to miss it. The smoke from the tip of her cousin's cigarette mixed with the air above her head and momentarily made her view foggy. There were several expensive lawn chairs around a glass table, but they'd ignored them and sat on the ground. Rory's knees were pulled to her chest, her arms wrapped around them. She could feel her neck getting a crick in it from looking up at the sky. Blake raised the beer bottle in his right hand to his lips and took a long drink before bringing his arm back to wrap around his legs, sitting in the same position as his sister. Rachel and Keiran were laying side by side on their backs, no one speaking. It was comfortable...natural. She felt like she belonged, strangely, more than she'd ever felt like she belonged somewhere in her life. Other than when she was in Tristan's bed.

His letter made her think...the four times they'd slept together she'd felt safe, which was strange because it wasn't like she'd ever in her life felt like she was in real danger. But he made her feel safe. He made her feel needed, wanted. Like she was the only person he'd ever met, or like she was the only one he'd ever touched. Being with him made her feel free, gorgeous, and protected, like he'd never let anyone hurt her. Other than himself, of course.

He was protective, possessive, arrogant, and rude. But she had loved him. Still loved him. The letter had done nothing to help her. She rolled her neck in a circle. Five days ago it had been the Fourth of July. Independence Day was one of her favorite holidays, but no one here celebrated it, of course. She and her brothers had been patriotic by getting piss drunk, though. It had been the only time she or Blake had ever drank with Shane, although they both knew it wasn't their little brother's first encounter with alcohol.

Rory was pulled form her thoughts when the back door slid open and their aunt poked her head out. "Blake, Rory? Your father's on the phone. He wants to talk to you."

The twins looked at each other uncertainly, they hadn't talked to their father in nearly three weeks. He was in Paris on a business trip at the moment but was do to return home that night. Rachel and Keiran glanced over at them questioningly, but they shrugged and stood, following their aunt inside. Rebekah led them into the livingroom and handed Rory one of the cordless while Blake picked up the phone attached to the wall. They each put their ears to the phone to hear Shane and their father talking animatedly. Their eyes met and both were obviously shocked. "Dad?" Blake said uncertainly.

"Blake, Rory? Are you there sweetie?"

"Yeah dad, I'm here." she said quietly, clutching the phone tighter. She didn't know why she was on edge...maybe because she hadn't talked to him in three weeks, or maybe because he hadn't said her name since her mother's accident...or maybe it was just because for some reason, he sounded like his old self again.

"How are you two?"

"Fine. How's Paris?" Blake asked.

"Same as always. Listen, I'm going to make this quick because my plane leaves soon, but how would you three feel about coming home two weeks early? I'm getting back in the morning and I was thinking you could fly home tomorrow. We'd just stay home for a week and then we could go on a vacation. We haven't been to Cozumel in a few years and we all need to get away. What do you think?"

The three were silent until Rory spoke, "Are you okay, dad? You're not drinking or anything, are you?"

He laughed lightly, "No, baby, I'm not. I've just been so stupid with you guys lately. Since your mom's...accident, I've barely even spoken to you. I'm sorry for that. I want to make it up to you, so one week of doing whatever you want while I get things in order with work and then we'll leave for a week...just the four of us."

"Are you serious about this?" Blake asked, looking at his sister for her agreement.

"My secretary is on the other line with Delta ready to pull some strings to get you home tomorrow if you want to."

The twins smiled lightly at each other, "Okay." Blake said quietly. "We'll start packing."

Twenty minutes later Rory was in her room, her two suitcases open as she and Rachel neatly folded her clothes and set them in. "So you're leaving at ten tomorrow morning?" she asked, laying a skirt in the smaller of the two bags.

Rory nodded, "Yeah."

"We'll miss you two."

The brunette turned to look at the other girl and smiled sadly, "We'll miss you too."

Rachel hugged her tightly, closing her eyes. She didn't get along well with girls...she just didn't. They were bitchy and snobby and catty...but Rory wasn't. That was part of the reason she'd been so excited when Keiran had said his twin cousins were coming to visit. He liked them and had known that she and Rory would get along...and they had. She'd never really had a girlfriend, and it was nice.

Rory smiled lightly, hugging her cousin's girlfriend back, "You have my number, right?" she asked, pulling away.

Rachel nodded, surprising herself by wiping her eyes, "And you have mine?"

"Yeah."

The blonde pursed her lips sadly and put her hands on either side of Rory's face, "Jeez, Rory, what am I going to do?" she laughed at herself, "Now with you leaving it'll just be Margo and Callista." Rory laughed lightly, biting her lip. She really like Rachel. "Augh." she shook her head, "I never get attached to anyone. You're terrible."

Rory laughed for real this time, "Call me when they drive you crazy."

Rachel nodded, smiling lightly as she dropped the last article of Rory's clothing into the suitcase.  
Had she really only been there for five weeks? It'd felt like years, "And give that boy a chance."

She bit her lips, continuing to smile slightly, "If I ever see him again."

Rachel nodded knowingly, "You will. If he really loves you as much as he seems to, he'll find a way back." she glanced out to the backyard where Blake and Keiran were talking, one holding a beer and one with a cigarette. "They always do when it's real."

Rory stepped into the terminal, smiling as she saw her father standing with his hands in his pockets, a huge grinning overtaking his face as his children came off of the plane. He began walking over to them to meet them halfway. He looked good, no denying it. He looked alive for the first time in months. He had color back in his face, he was back up to his normal weight. She wondered what it was that made him come back to them. Chris hugged both of his sons crushingly and pulled his daughter to him, spinning her around and kissing her forehead affectionately. And her shock just increased. In the past twelve hours he'd said her name, looked at her, called her 'sweetie', actually touched her, and kissed her. It was more than he'd done in months.

Chris announced that he was taking them out for lunch on the way home and after that he had to get back to the office to start tying some things up so they could leave for a week. An hour and a half later Rory found herself in the livingroom surrounded by her friends. Well, that is, except for her brother and Madeline, who'd been dragged up to his room the moment she came through the door. Shane was at his girlfriend's house, and Rory realized for the first time that her little baby, fourteen year old brother was far from a virgin. She smiled to herself as she glanced up towards the ceiling and knew that he was so much like Blake.

Speak of the devil, he was swaggering down the stairs and Maddy followed him, both of them ignoring their long lost modesty. They didn't care that all of their friends had been milling around downstairs while they made up for lost time. In fact, Blake looked very pleased with himself and Madeline blushed and his arm snaked around her waist; although Rory knew it was from the activities upstairs rather than her modesty. They moved to the basement and Baker opened the cabinet across from the sink in the kitchenette and began making drinks for everyone while Henry, Jess, and Blake played a game of cutthroat. She was sitting next to Adam on the couch, his arm around her as she leaned against his side, laughing with Madeline, Paris, Lane, and Louise. Adam wasn't speaking...just running his fingertip up and down her arm lightly, watching her.

Not much had happened in the weeks she'd been gone, other than Tristan's visit, of course. But out of respect for Adam they didn't talk about it in front of him. Baker came over and grinned at Rory, giving out screwdrivers and cosmopolitans. She sipped her's slowly, watching the boys play pool. Nothing had changed. It was like they'd never left. That was the best thing about these people, they could spend weeks, even months away form each other and pick up right where they'd left off. The girls slowly dispersed and Adam had disappeared five minutes ago. Rory sat up, grabbing Paris's arm, "Can I talk to you?"

The blonde looked at her worriedly, "Of course." she stood and followed Rory out of the basement, closing the door behind her before following the brunette onto the stairs where they couldn't be heard over the music and talking of the others. Rory sighed heavily, sitting on one of the steps halfway up and Paris sat on the one below it, watching her, "You okay?"

Adam hung up his phone and shook his head, he couldn't stand his mother. She was driving him crazy. But that didn't dampen his mood. Nothing could, because Rory was home. Rory...the first girl he'd ever loved. She was perfect, and she loved him back...or at least he thought she did. He moved to make his way back to the basement, having come up to the main level to talk to his mother, but he stopped when he heard two people on the stairs. It was Rory and...Paris? Rory sounded like she was crying. He wanted to go see if she was okay but then he herd her say something quietly, "...He came home."

Rory chewed her bottom lip, shaking her head. "He came home." Paris looked down, biting the insides of her cheeks guiltily. Rory swallowed hard and Paris thought she heard her trying to keep her emotions in check. She spoke again, her voice hollow, "He came home and no one even told me."

Paris looked up at her and bit her lip, whispering, "We all figured someone else would have told you. No one realized you didn't know."

Rory shook her head, her voice disbelieving as she ignored Paris's quiet apology, "And the whole time Blake knew. I talked to you, Jess, and Lane." she was staring at the wall, off in another world. "I'm not trying to make you feel guilty." she said quietly, her gaze not wavering, "I just..." she trailed off, blinking slowly as if coming out of a daze.

"Rory-" she started quietly, but she was cut off.

"He wrote me a letter." she spoke quietly but forcefully. "I got it the day he left." she shook her head, visibly resigned, "He didn't tell me he loved me. He didn't say he was ever coming back. It just said that he wanted me to believe what you told me about when he left. He said he couldn't be here and not be with me and that all of this had happened because we couldn't be together." Rory turned to look at Paris, who was hanging onto her every word, "One of the main reasons he agreed to come home was because he wanted to see me." she said quietly, looking at her friend with tears in her eyes, "And I wished I'd been home. I want to see him, Paris. God, I want to see him so bad."

Paris looked at her best friend sadly, touching Rory's knee gently, "Rory." she whispered, at a loss for words.

"I..." she looked away, swallowing hard, "I miss him. I just, I want to see him again." she inhaled shakily, "He loved me, I know he did. It's just...he was perfect." her thoughts were obviously scattered. "He was perfect. Like, the first time we had sex he didn't question my judgement. We were in his room and he took off my shirt and then just looked at me, I guess he was...I don't know...I guess he was making sure it was what I wanted, but I just had to smile and he knew...he knew. He didn't tell me he loved me and he didn't tell me I was beautiful or perfect. He just..." she trailed off, unable to form words for it. "...we just _were_." she narrowed her eyes slightly, remembering as she shook her head minutely, her gaze back on the wall, "And he was always looking me in the eye. It was like I was the only person he'd ever really looked at. Even when we first slept together, he looked me in the eye the entire time. He was never about my body." she inhaled slowly, "And no one has ever made me feel like that. No one has ever made me feel so beautiful or perfect or loved. And he didn't even know he was doing it. He didn't have to say it for me to know he loved me, because we didn't say it very often, but I just...I knew."

She looked down at Paris, who was watching her as if she'd never really seen her before, "I haven't had sex with Adam. I don't think he even knows I'm not a virgin. I just..." she shook her head, "I loved him. And I didn't get to see him. If I had I don't know what would have happened." she chewed on her bottom lip, looking away as her hair fell into her face, "But we'll never be the way we were." she looked over a her friend, "He's never coming back, is he?" she whispered.

Paris bit her lip, not willing to hurt her friend, "I don't know." which was a lie. He was coming back. He'd given her his word, she just didn't know when it would be fulfilled.

Adam sat at the top of the stairs five minutes after the door had closed and the girls had gone back inside. He felt physical pain. His entire body hurt...just...hurt. His chest wouldn't rise and his eyes burned. His throat seemed to be closing in on itself. He couldn't believe it. He loved her. Fucking loved her, and here she was, talking about how wonderful her lying bastard ex boyfriend had been. She wasn't even a fucking virgin. They'd been together for five months, longer than she'd been with Tristan. He'd always thought she was just scared to have sex...afraid to lose her virginity. He'd been so fucking stupid. He had almost convinced himself that she really loved him, but she'd never even wanted him, had she? It had all been a lie. A fucking lie he'd forced himself to believe.

He ran a hand through his hair nervously, standing up quickly. He was so fucking stupid, but he couldn't leave now. He had to go back in there. And so he did. He walked back in, hugged her, and kissed her deeply. And for the first time, he really noticed how withdrawn she was...how much she'd always pulled away from him. He broke the kiss and looked at her, smiling hollowly. She returned it warmly and he felt his anger begin to ebb. They sat together on the couch and he didn't miss the glance Rory exchanged with Paris.

Adam leaned against the headboard of his large bed, balancing a bottle of vodka on his knee, his hand clutching the neck as he stared as his wall and took another long swig, barely able to stop himself from spilling it all over the mattress. The mattress he was sitting on top of alone...not the way he'd planned to spend the night Rory got back. He blinked slowly, unmoving as the image of her and Tristan was burned into his skull. He hated her, damn it he hated her. But he had no spine. If he'd had any spine when it came to her then he would've ended it with her right when he walked in and kissed her. But he didn't. And he hated himself, because even after three quarters of a bottle of straight vodka, he still loved her.

**Are you out of your mind?**

**You dug yourself into a liar's hole **

**You made a little spark to live inside **

**It's now a fucking fire out of control.**

**How did I let her inside?**

**We're dripping of sweat, I'm feeling alright **

**Her lips were the last thing touched tonight **

**Your best friend is not your girlfriend **

**It hurts **

**It hurts **

**It hurts **

**It hurts**


	28. Over My Head

_A/N: Okay, I know it seems like Tristan is never coming back and this is dragging on and on...and yeah, it kinda is...but for all of you who are dying for him to come back...either this will be the last one where he doesn't, or it will be the one after the next. It's just that I hate fics where he's only gone for like, 2 or 3 chapters and it's like, no one would only send their kid to a school for like, 2 months so what was the point of sending him away anyway? Anyway, I don't own Gilmore Girls or_ Over My Head_ by The Fray._

**Everyone knows I'm in over my head **

**Over my head **

**With eight seconds left in overtime **

**She's on your mind **

**She's on your mind**

Tristan, Rick, Amy, Stewart, and Mackenzie were on the lawn of the school, the girls laying down in the grass while Stewart hit on Amy blatantly; and he and Rick were throwing a football back and forth. They'd been outside for half an hour and Stewart had nearly convinced Amy to sneak off with him when one of the numerous drill sergeants who stayed over the summer made her way out onto the lawn. "Dugrey!" she called sharply, breaking Amy's attention away from the boy next to her. Stewart swore loudly, falling bak onto the grass.

Tristan laughed at him, but turned to the woman, obviously confused, "Yeah?"

Her eyebrow shot up, "Excuse me?"

He bit the inside of his cheek, "Yes ma'am?"

"You have a phone call in the office." without another word, she turned and strode away.

Rick looked over at Tristan with narrowed eyes, but the blonde just shrugged, "I'll be right back." and he followed the woman inside. Rick just shrugged and motioned for Stewart to stand in Tristan's old spot so that they could continue tossing the ball.

Tristan followed her inside, stopping once she sat at her desk in the front office. She nodded towards a small room on the right wall and Tristan walked into it, picking up the phone. "Hit line three." she called out to him.

He pressed the orange button slowly and slid the phone to his ear, "Hello?"

"Tristan." a male voice said his name curtly.

His eyes narrowed and his back straightened up as he replied in the same tone, "Father."

"You've been back at school for three weeks."

He desperately wanted to spit out the biting comeback that was resting on the tip of his tongue, but refrained, speaking slowly, "Yes."

His father inhaled deeply, "I've spoken to your grandfather and Headmaster Charleston." Tristan instantly gripped the phone tighter, but didn't respond, his father didn't give him time to anyway, "You will definitely attend Military School for the first quarter fo your Junior year, but if-" he stressed the word, "- you keep a 95 average or higher in all your subjects, attend class everyday, and keep your discipline record clean, you will be permitted to return home and to Chilton." Tristan's eyes widened, but his father wasn't through, "So long as you continue to keep your grades up and stay out of trouble once you come home." He was silent, waiting to see if his father was done. "Well, Tristan?"

"Yes, I'd like to come home."

"Very well then. Once I get your report card at the end of the first nine weeks I'll send you a ticket if your grades are up to scratch."

They sat in silence for a moment, "Thank you." Tristan said finally.

"Just keep your grades up and stay in line." and the other line went dead. Tristan looked down at the phone, still unbelieving as the ring-tone filled the room. So he really was going to go home? Not a good idea. No fighting or getting in trouble? He seemed to attract the things. He'd get in over his head fast.

Arthur Dugrey put the phone down heavily and looked up at his father, "There, are you happy now?"

Janlan folded his hands on top of lap, "Not even close." he leaned forward slightly, watching his son become more and more uncomfortable, "I have to say, not telling me that my grandson was being shipped off until he was actually on the plane was smart. It was a good way to keep me from interfering. But I'm glad you're finally coming around."

His eyes narrowed, "The only reason I'm bringing him home now is because I know that if I didn't, you would call him and tell him that he could live with you." Janlan just grinned, both of them knowing that was exactly what he'd planned. "And I won't have you poison my son against me."

His eyebrows raised, "Oh, you don't need my help on that one, son. You've got it covered."

He rolled his eyes, "I guess I do take after you."

His father ignored him, "Why did you send him off, anyway? You told me he was being disrespectful, but I know you, and if he'd been disrespectful you would have just backhanded him and ignored him for a week. You also told me it was because he was getting into trouble at school, so I talked to the Headmaster." Arthur's grip on the armrest of his chair tightened noticeably. "'_No trouble'_ he said, _'no trouble at all, except for that girlfriend of his'_ of course, he wasn't mad, mind you, he was actually quite amused. His chuckling gave it away. _'The PDA is a little much, and they get detention occasionally, but you know how teenagers are, Janlan. It's harmless. Absolutely no trouble, though. Your grandson is actually quite the student. In the top five percentile of his class, one of the only two boys that made it onto the varsity soccer team when he was a Freshman. Peer mediator. Half of his courses are advanced placement classes. A very good addition, in fact. The school's not the same without him.'_ Those were his exact words, Arthur." Janlan leaned back in his seat as his son blanched ever so slightly. "So this just leaves me to think, _Arthur lied_, no surprise there, of course. You always stretched the truth to make your decisions seem better.

"So I thought about this girl and remembered that I'd met her several times and like her a great deal, so obviously you would have hated her. And it all made sense." he laced his fingers together, resting his elbows on the armrests of his chair, "I must say, son, sending your child away because he's running with the wrong crowd is one thing, but shipping him off because your wife doesn't like his girlfriend's mother is something different entirely."

"Don't tell me how to raise my son." he snapped, sitting up straighter.

"Oh no, Arthur, I'm not telling you how to raise your son. It's too late for that. He's nearly seventeen, and you weren't the one who raised him. You paid nannies to do it for you, and now when he's older and you don't know how to deal with him you're just going to send him off for someone else to deal with." he leaned forward in his seat, "Now tell me honestly, did all of this happen because of the girl?"

He didn't answer, just glared at his father coldly, "You can't understand, so don't try to and don't send me on this guilt trip. I didn't want to send him away, and if you knew me then you'd know that. I love Tristan."

"Good way of showing it."

"I do and you know it." he said quietly, "My wife made me send him away."

Janlan's eyes narrowed, "You could have said no."

Arthur leaned back in his seat, "She would have gone public with my affair."

"Your affair is no secret, son. Everyone knows about it."

"It still would've ruined me."

"Can you blame her for wanting it? If you really wanted to be with that woman then you should have filed for divorce, Arthur, like I told you two years ago. You were worried about appearances then, but you're even worse off now. And where is the secretary now, anyway? Do you even know? You didn't want to be with her, you just couldn't control yourself." he leaned forward, "Janelle is no more to blame for Tristan being sent away than you are. I know you love your son, but there is no excuse for the way you've raised him." Janlan leaned back in his seat, "I don't know what happened, Arthur. Your mother and I raised you ourselves. We never hired help to take care of you. You weren't always like this. It wasn't until you met Janelle. Your mother didn't like her, but for entirely different reasons than your wife doesn't like Rory." he leaned forward, "I don't know where I went wrong with you, but I will not allow you to force Tristan to become like you are. We sent you away when you were seventeen to keep you from her because we didn't want you to turn out like this, the way her family has always been."

"And why the hell do you think I didn't fight harder to keep Tristan here?" he hissed, pushing his chair away from his desk and standing up, "I don't want this to be the relationship I have with my son in twenty years."

Janlan didn't stand, just watched his son, "If you had stepped back and looked at the situation then you would have realized that getting you away from Janelle might have saved you, but you were so angry that you couldn't think that we might have possibly known what was best for you. Now think about Tristan, why are you sending him away? What good will getting him away from this girl do? Nothing. It will only pull the two of you farther apart. She is nothing like your wife and you know it." They sat in silence, Arthur breathing heavily as he stared at his father, thinking over his words. He may not have had a relationship with the man, but before today he'd always respected him and listened to him. Janlan nodded, standing slowly, "I'll see myself out."

**_THREE WEEKS LATER_**

Rory sat in the passenger seat of Blake's car as he sped down the interstate, constantly changing lanes and yelling at other cars to speed up. He flew by several cops, but only one stopped him, and once he told the officer what was going on, he let them go but said to slow down. The atmosphere in the car was tense and Rory felt as if the vehicle would explode with it. She looked over at her brother to see a manic grin on his face and looked into the backseat to see Shane staring out the window happily. Rory inhaled deeply, smiling to herself as she looked again at her brother while he took the turn into the hospital on two wheels. Three of the four doors flew open and slammed in unison as the siblings streaked towards the entrance. They ignored the receptionist calling after them to ask for their name and identifications, not stopping until they reached the elevator. Blake pushed the 'up' bottom quickly several times, but when the doors didn't immediately open Rory nodded towards the door next to them, "Stairs." she said quickly, and Shane reached it first, throwing it open and the twins followed him. They didn't stop running until they'd reached the door for the eleventh floor, the residence's floor. Blake reached it first and threw it open, the three of them streaking out one after another.

They spotted the door that led to the hall of patients under a coma and ran towards it. "Hey!" a receptionist called, "You can't go in there." Shane and Rory stopped suddenly, sliding several inches on the polished floor as they remembered that from this side the door had to be unlocked.

Blake ignored her and ran straight into the swinging door, but this time it didn't swing. "Ow, shit!" he grabbed his already reddening forehead, closing his eyes and swinging around to face her.

She smirked, snorting lightly, "I would assume you're the Hayden children. Your father did the same thing."

Rory turned to face her, "Lorelai, Richard, and Shane." she said quickly, using her and her brother's first names.

The woman smiled, "I know, but it's policy that I see your identifications." Rory and Blake quickly pulled out their licenses while Shane flashed his school ID. The woman glanced at the cards before typing in a code on her computer. There was a quiet buzzing and Blake once more ran towards the door. This time it swung open and the other two followed him in, Rory yelling a hurried thanks over her shoulder. They streaked down the hall until they came to their mother's room. The door was already open and they could hear their father and grandparents talking.

They bolted in, all three jumping onto the bed. Lorelai squealed, wrapping her arms around her children. At Emily's protest the three finally slid off the bed, but didn't shy far from it. Rory momentarily tore her eyes from her mother's face and looked over at her grandmother, instantly realizing that she'd only made them get off out of habit, because she was smiling happily form ear to ear.

_**ONE MONTH LATER**_

Rory sat on Paris's bed, watching her pack her bookbag for school the next day. The blonde was pushing her Trig book into the navy blue bag when she said, "At least we have most of our classes together."

"Yeah."

"And don't you have a lot of classes with Baker and Adam?"

She nodded, "Mmhmm."

Paris stopped packing and turned to face Rory, "Do you even like him?"

"What?" she looked over at Paris, having missed the question.

She sighed, rolling her eyes, "Do you even like Adam?"

Rory was silent for a moment, thinking, "Yeah."

Paris's head cocked back, surprised, "You do?"

Rory nodded, "Yes. I mean, it's not like I'm in love with him or anything, but I have liked him since he moved here, and I do still like him."

"Oh." she went back to packing, "I just didn't think you did. I mean, not like Tristan, anyway." they'd never spoken of Rory outburst a month earlier.

Rory shrugged, "It's different than Tristan. I loved Tristan. I don't love Adam, but I guess that letter two months ago was the last thing I needed to get over him."

Paris stopped, turning to face her again, "Wait, so you're completely over him?"

She laughed lightly, "Yeah. I've pretty much been the world's worst girlfriend to Adam-" Paris nodded slightly in agreement, and Rory threw a pillow at her, "But I do like him. I mean, he's been so good. Like, amazing. I was horrible and withdrawn and I just..." she looked away, "I was such a bitch to him, but he never walked away. So now I guess it's my turn to work with him and make sure this lasts." she looked over a her friend, "I've decided that I'm finally going to get the whole relationship thing right."

"What do you mean?"

"Well the relationship with Dean just sucked. Me and Tristan could never get it together even at our best, and up until now me and Adam haven't been able to get it right." she shrugged, walking over to the vanity, "I guess I'm just ready to make one work without all the drama."

Paris laughed, she herself had actually grown to like Adam in the past few months, "Finally." Rory just wrinkled her nose and grinned.

"Anyway-" she started as she sat at the vanity, looking through Paris's small supply of makeup, "-I'm sure he's over me by now."

"Mmm." was all Paris said, nodding thoughtfully.

Rory turned to look at her, "What?"

She shook her head, "Nothing. You know, Louise bitched him out."

"What? When?"

Paris leaned back on the bed, "Whenever he came home in June. We were all at Baker's and he left the room. Louise followed him and they got into it."

"You heard them?"

"No. She told me about it later."

"What did she say to him?" Rory asked, eyes wide.

"She was mad at him for just leaving like that, and she yelled at him for hurting you."

"What did he say?"

Paris shrugged, "She didn't tell me."

Rory nodded, sitting back in the chair as she glanced back down at her friend's makeup. She hadn't thought Louise had been that upset.

_**LATER THAT NIGHT**_

They all sat in Paris's backyard. There were stone steps that led down to a metal fire basin and lawn chairs on a stone platform, raised up from the dirt ground surrounding it. It was an enclave in the woods, facing away from her house. The fire was going and they all had drinks. Beer, surprisingly considering none of the girls liked it, but they all drank it anyway. School was starting the next day and they'd all decided that they hang out tonight...just let summer go out slowly. Her legs were folded under her, and the fingers of her left hand were laced with Adam's right. She was angled slightly towards him, her torso and arms swimming in a large sweatshirt she'd stolen from him a few weeks earlier.

He'd actually noticed her warming up to him in the past month, but he hated himself for trusting her. He just...couldn't let her go, no matter how much he needed to. He watched her raise the bottle to her lips and take a slow drink, staring at the fire. Everyone was silent.

They were all silent, but it was comfortable. Louise and Madeline were sitting together on a small bench, Baker and Blake were sitting next to each other on the ground, their feet planted on the ground and their arms wrapped around their shins. Jess was sitting in the same position as them, but across the fire, and Paris was behind him, her legs tucked under her and her arms wrapped around him, resting her chin on his shoulder from behind. Lane was sitting in the last chair, one of her legs tucked under her with the other off the chair, over Henry's shoulder as he sat with his back against the chair, running his fingertips lightly over her exposed shin as he stared at the fire.

And they all just..._were_. It was really the first time they'd all sat and everyone had been content. No one was upset with anyone else, no one was lying. It was just comfortable. Rory pushed herself closer against him and laid her head on his shoulder. He looked down at her and after a moment she tore her gaze from the fire and looked up at him, smiling warmly. He smiled back and kissed the top of her head. She closed her eyes, turning her face back towards the heat of the fire and released his hand, wrapping both of her arms tightly around his right as her fingertips traced the inside of his upper arm lightly.

God, he wanted this. He needed this to work with her. There was no way in hell he was going to walk away from it.

_**NEXT DAY**_

Rory's alarm went off and she swore under her breath, rolling over and burrowing deeper into the covers. Why was her alarm going off anyway? It was summer. Her eyes cracked open to glance at the time. 6:15? That was what time she usually got up for school. Why was...and then she remembered it was the first day of school. She swore and threw off the covers, turning off her alarm and bolting across the hall to Blake's room, who happened to still be asleep with his alarm thrown against the opposite wall. He had anger issues. She laughed, shaking her head as she crawled into bed next to him. Rory poked him lightly and he whined, inching away from her. She shook his shoulder and he burrowed deeper into the covers, "Go back to sleep." was muffled from sleep and because his face was shoved against the pillow. She shook him harder and he swore, "Damn it Maddy, you don't have to go home right now." and his arm snaked around her waist, pulling her against him. Rory burst out laughing and removed his arm from her waist. This obviously brought him out of dreamland and his eyes opened, blinking slowly. He recognized his sister and pushed her away grumpily, "You're not Madeline." And he pulled the covers tighter around himself, closing his eyes. "If you really wanted to sleep with me then all you had to do was ask. Now stay on your side of the bed and don't kick in your sleep because I hate it when you do that."

She rolled her eyes, yanking the covers off of him and throwing them off the bed before walking out of his room. His body convulsed slightly and he yelped before rolling over, "What the hell, Rory!"

"School." she called from the hall in a singsong voice, laughing at his expense. He groaned and rolled over, but got out of bed and ambled clumsily over to the bathroom adjacent to his room. It was going to be a long day.

Rory walked down to breakfast in shorts and a tank top, letting her hair air dry, but running her fingers through it every few minutes so that it dried straight. She smiled upon spotting her mother sitting on the counter next to the coffee maker while whining to her father about Michele. She still smiled every time she saw her mother. She'd had minimal memory loss, mostly the week before her accident, and didn't remember finding the birth control in Rory's room. She'd decided she'd tell her mother about the fact that she wasn't a virgin later, after they'd settled into their old routine and things were back to normal, but she was definitely telling her this time. She made her way over and sat up on the island across from the counter, grabbing a waffle from the large stack next to the stove that the cook had made.

Blake walked in, stopping momentarily and smiling at his mother, "Morning, mom."

She smiled back, now used to her family grinning every time they saw her, "Morning baby."

His nose wrinkled playfully, "_Mom_!" he groaned.

She laughed and threw half of the bagel she was eating at her son, "Too old to be called baby by your mommy?"

He laughed as it bounced off his chest and landed on the ground, "Just a little."

Lorelai rolled her eyes and turned to Rory, "How'd you sleep, sweetie?"

"Fine."

"You look tired."

"Very."

"I'm guessing I can attribute your one syllable answers to the fact that you haven't had any coffee this morning?" she asked as she coffee maker beeped.

Rory nodded, jumping down form the island and grabbing a mug, "Mhmm."

"Yeah, makes sense. Your mother was speaking on one syllable words before the first batch was done." Chris said, grinning at his wife as she scrunched her nose.

Rory took a long sip from her cup and glanced at the clock. 6:45. "Mmm." she pulled the mug from her lips, "I have to go get ready. I'll see you guys when you get home form work." She and her mother kissed each other on the cheek, "Bye mom."

"Bye babe."

She kissed her father's cheek, "Bye daddy."

"I'll see you at seven, sweetie."

She looked over at her brother, who was rummaging through the fridge, a mug of coffee on the counter next to him while he held a dry waffle in his hand, "Blake, you should start getting ready too. We have to leave in fifteen minutes and you spend more time on your hair than I do."

He turned around, a can of whipped cream in hand and sprayed it on his waffle, taking a bite before scoffing, "I do not. It just gives that appearance because my hair is so much more gorgeous than yours."

She rolled her eyes, tossing her now dry hair over her shoulder as her brother took another huge bite of his waffle and whipped cream, "Charming." he just stuck his tongue out at her, showing her the chewed food as she turned to walk upstairs, "Mhmm, I can see what Maddy sees in you." He just laughed before grabbing another waffle and following her upstairs.

**And suddenly I become a part of your past**

**I'm becoming the part that don't last**

**I'm losing you and it's effortless**

**Without a sound we lose sight of the ground**

**In the throw around**

**Never thought that you wanted to bring it down**

**I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves**


	29. Somewhere In Between

**A/N: I don't own _Gilmore Girls_ or _Somewhere In Between_ by Lifehouse**

**I can't keep losing sleep over this **

**No I can't, and now I cannot stop pacing **

**Give me a few hours and I'll have this thing all sorted out **

**If my mind would just stop racing **

**Cause I cannot stand still **

**I can't be this unsturdy **

**This cannot be happening**

Rory sat next to Adam in second period on Thursday. It was the only class that the two of them,  
Blake, Paris, Madeline, Louise, Henry, and Baker all had together. She rolled her head in a circle to relieve the tension. This was the end of the ninth week of the year and it was midterm week. She had the midterm for this class the next day. It was her last test and the only one she was worried about. Plus, she hated World History, even though she had a 99 in the class. Luckily, the school had a new approach this year: they had intercessions. It meant that at the end of each quarter, the students who were falling behind could come for a week and get a credit to make sure they passed the class, and every one who was on track got a week of vacation. She just needed to get through this midterm and she'd be fine.

Adam looked over at her as she stood to get Henry's book off of his desk, and his eyebrows shot up as he saw her uniform. The skirt was hemmed up to mid-thigh and the shirt was much tighter than he remembered it ever being; rather than knee socks and saddle shoes, her legs were bare and she had on navy blue heels. (Of course, that wasn't allowed, but somehow Rory had been able to get away with anything this year.) And rather than the girl's ties she was wearing one of the boy's. She turned to look at him, "What?" he just looked her up and down and she laughed lightly, "Oh. Yeah. I spent the night at Louise's last night. They're hers. And she didn't have an extra tie, so I took Blake's extra one out of his car this morning."

He just shook his head, bringing his eyes back to her face, "I'm not complaining."

She laughed lightly and hit him in the arm, "I like it, though. I'm thinking of making it permanent." Her mother had hemmed her skirts for this year so that they were as short as the dress code allowed, and she'd ordered shirts that fit her tighter. Not that she'd been going for that, but she'd filled out since she was fifteen. She was now nearly seventeen and had developed curves, so her clothes fit differently anyway. She'd never understood why girls wore shortened shirts and tight shirts before, but now she did. It just made you feel...hot, for lack of a better word. Hot, but not slutty with the way she carried herself. "Of course, the skirt would have to be a little bit longer, but not as long as my skirts last year. I like the shirt and the tie. But these shoes would kill me." she laughed lightly, "So I could pull this look off...maybe twice a week. But I'd keep the shirt and tie. My skirt would be to-" she touched a spot on her thigh two inches below the hem on Louise's, "-about here."

She sat back down and he nodded, "If you want it." she looked over at him and he just smirked,  
shaking his head.

Blake and Paris were quizzing each other in the corner, but she suspected that they were really talking about Tristan. His birthday had been last month and Paris had gotten one of those huge cards the size of a posterboard folded in half and everyone signed it. Everyone had written notes to him inside, chock full of inside jokes and terms of endearment, but she hadn't been able to think of anything. She'd probably held it for ten minutes, trying to come up with something. What she had lamely settled on was 'Happy Birthday, Tristan. I hope you like North Carolina. Love, Rory'. Adam hadn't been thrilled about her throwing the 'love' in there, but he'd refrained from complaining about it.

She couldn't believe it'd been a year. There was no way that it had been a year since Tristan had first told her that he loved her. It'd been one hell of a year. Baker walked over and pulled a desk over to Rory and Adam before sitting down and making himself comfortable. He slid his pen behind his ear and leaned back in his seat. "What's up?"

Rory smiled over at him, "Hey Baker."

Adam nodded, "Hey man."

He nodded to the boy before turning to her, "Did you have any plans after school?"

She thought for a moment before shaking her head, "Not that I can think of."

"Good. Cause Paris is on the war path. She's taken this whole student government thing to the extreme. She's scheduled meetings for us today and tomorrow."

Her head dropped several inches, "It's the last two days before vacation." he nodded, sighing heavily. Rory rolled her eyes, "What for?"

He sighed, shrugging, "Hell if I know. I think she wants us to organize tutoring for the elementary school and start talking about the winter formal."

Her eyes widened, "The winter formal that isn't until January?"

He nodded, "That would be the one."

"How in the world did we let ourselves get dragged into this?" he just shook his head, shrugging. Paris had wanted to be Junior class president and had somehow convinced Rory to run with her as vice president, Baker as secretary, and Henry as treasurer.

Baker sighed, resting his forehead on her shoulder, "I hate meetings."

"I know."

"Stop complaining!" Paris snapped from across the room.

Baker's head jumped off of her shoulder and he turned to the blonde, "But Paris, darling, I can't help it. You bring out the worst in me."

She rolled her eyes, "You're such a baby."

He grinned, "Can I be in charge of the location for the formal?"

"No."

"Ah!" he pouted, standing up and walking over to her and sitting on top of her desk, "Why not?"

She rolled her eyes and pushed him off, "Because you'd probably pick some abandoned warehouse and decide it would be fun to have a rave."

He grinned and stood up, brushing off his blazer, "Paris, I'm impressed. You know what a rave is."

She rolled her eyes, "Mutiny. Watch it, I might have to exercise my authority and have you quartered." He put his hands over his chest and mouthed 'Ow' dramatically. She rolled her eyes,  
"Go back to annoying Rory."

He blew her a kiss before walking away, "You know you love me."

She rolled her eyes, "God help me, I do."

"Watch it Haulk." Louise called across the room.

He grinned, strutting confidently across the room to her, "Luie." he said playfully, grabbing her around the waist and swinging her around. He set her down and nuzzled her neck playfully. She laughed, pushing him away, "You know you're the only one for me."

She gave up on pushing him away since he obviously wasn't going anywhere. "That's nice, but you can let me go."

He nuzzled her neck again, "Uh-uh."

She wriggled her hips, "Baker."

"Luie." he sat down on a chair that wasn't connected to a desk and pulled her into his lap.

She rolled her eyes and crossed her legs, leaning her elbow on her knee, "You're impossible."

He grinned and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer, "Mhmm."

Rory realized she was staring at them and turned to look at Adam. He looked at her as well and they grinned at each other. "Do you think he knows the entire class is staring at him?" she asked,  
leaning closer.

He leaned closer as well, grinning, "I think he likes it that way."

She laughed, "Yeah?"

He nodded, kissing her gently, "At least they're not into exhibitionism."

She smiled, "Thank heaven for small mercies."

Adam laughed as the bell rang and he stood up, "Thank heaven."

_**NORTH CAROLINA, SATURDAY**_

Tristan zipped up his suitcase and Rick watched him disappointedly from his own bed. "So then you're rally leaving?"

He nodded, not turning to look at his friend, "Yeah."

Rick sighed heavily, "It's been one hell of a year."

Tristan snorted lightly, "Yeah."

Rick opened his mouth to say something else, but the door busted open and Kyle, Stewart, Amy, and Mackenzie fell into the room. Stewart came over and pulled Tristan into a spine-crushing 'man hug' and Kyle did the same. "Can't believe you're abandoning us, Dugrey."

He laughed, "I know, but somehow I think you'll make it without me."

Kyle rolled his eyes, "And you're so humble."

Tristan laughed and enveloped Amy in a hug, lifting her off the ground. "How did you two get in here?" there was a strict policy of no girls in the dorms.

"The sergeants are always easy going about bringing people in to say bye when one of the guys leaves." Stewart explained, wrapping his arms around Amy after Tristan set her down. "They're pretty good about letting people say goodbye."

Tristan nodded thoughtfully and his gaze fell on Mackenzie who was still by the door, her arms folded over her chest as she watched them quietly. She smiled weakly and he opened his arms widely. She inhaled deeply, walking into him and wrapping her arms around his neck. He picked her up and spun her around before setting her back on the ground, but he didn't let her go. Her smile was watery as she pulled away from him. He smiled at her, using his thumb to wipe away the tears that were threatening to spill onto her cheeks. She bit her lip and kissed his cheek gently. "It won't be the same without you." she said quietly.

He smiled, pulling her into another hug, "Jeez Kenzie, you're gonna break my heart."

She laughed, "Have a safe flight, Tris." he kissed her forehead and gave her one last squeeze before releasing her.

"What time's your flight?" Kyle asked from his place on Tristan's old bed.

"Like, an hour and a half. I need to go now." he gave everyone one last hug before grabbing one of his suitcases. He went to take hold of the second, but Rick grabbed it. Tristan looked up at him. His roommate hadn't said anything since the others had gotten there.

"I'll go to the airport with you."

He nodded, "Thanks." and he meant it. They sat in the cab fifteen minutes later, a slightly awkward silence between them. "You okay?" Tristan asked, facing Rick.

He shrugged, staring out the window, "It's just weird."

"What?"

He shook his head, "I've had like, eight roommates, but I never really cared when one left."

Tristan looked out the window, smirking, "Yeah, we do get along pretty well."

Rick just snorted, "Yeah, and now all I have are the two dumbasses, the drama queen, and Kink."

Tristan laughed, "At least you still have her."

He glanced over at the blonde, "At least. But now I'll probably get some huge retard roommate with two foot thick skin since all my roomies leave and the school loses all their money."

He laughed as they pulled into the airport, "Don't be so hard on yourself, maybe you'll get another trust fund baby."

Rick smirked, "I told you your shoes were nice."

Tristan grinned, "Just better than your average petty criminal." Rick got out of the cab and walked around to the trunk to help Tristan pull out his bags. Once they had them Rick hit his knuckles against Tristan's before pulling him into a manly hug. "Thanks for riding with me."

He shook his head, "No problem." Rick sat back down in the backseat of the taxi and Tristan turned to walk into the building. "Hey Dugrey!" he called and Tristan turned. Rick grinned at him, "Go get your girl."

Tristan just smirked, nodding to him before the cab took off.

_**CONNECTICUT**_

Tristan rubbed the back of his neck as he sat at the dinner table. He was really back. He couldn't believe it. And his parents were talking like civilized people. His mother wasn't drinking every waking moment of the day. His father wasn't yelling or condescending. You could almost say they weren't dysfunctional. Almost.

"Tristan." his mother said, snapping her fingers for the maid.

"Yes ma'am?"

Her eyebrows shot up, "My, my, that school really can work wonders." he rolled his eyes as the maid came to his mother's aid. "A wine glass and a bottle from the cellar, Marge." The maid nodded obediently and Tristan chewed on the inside of his cheek. So much for her being sober his first night home. She turned to her son, "Anyway, darling, now that you're home there are a few things we need to get straight." his face didn't change, but his interest was peaked. She continued, "Like your father told you: a ninety five average or higher in all your classes. Absolutely no fighting-oh, thank you-" she smiled at the maid as her wine was brought to her. She poured herself a glass while continuing to talk to her son, "-you'd gotten in several last school year before you left, one of them actually in school. You're lucky you got off with a warning.

"Third: you must come the club and our friends' houses for parties-" he started to protest, but she held her hand up, "-no excuses. I know how much you hate those parties, but you must come. Fourth: lose the attitude. I've gotten tired of it the past year-"

He cut her off, "I haven't even been home for most of the past year!"

Her eyes widened at his outburst, "Arthur." she said quietly.

Her husband sighed, rolling his eyes, "Tristan don't take that tone with your mother."

Tristan shook his head. This was so stupid, "Whatever." he stood to leave, but his mother's voice stopped him.

"Oh and Tristan? One more thing."

He inhaled deeply, closing his eyes before turning around to look at her, "Yes?"

"No more hanging around with those Hayden children."

His heart skipped, "But mom-"

"No buts. I don't want you around them. They're a bad influence."

"Mother, think about it." he walked over to the table calmly, "Not talking to the Haydens would mean not talking to Louise Grant, Baker Haulk, or Paris Gellar. Is that really what you want?" he asked, throwing in his friends from the most influential families in the city.

His mother was silent for a moment, stewing it over, "Why would not talking to the Haydens keep you from them?"

"Because they're all very good friends with the Hayden twins, and I would never ask them to choose between me and them."

She looked up at her son suspiciously, "Why not?"

"Because that wouldn't be fair, mother." he pulled his seat closer to her, "Why don't I just stay with the friends I had before I left, but not give the Haydens any special attention? I'll just keep them as acquaintances."

"And what about that girl?"

"What about her?"

"Are you still mad about it?"

"No. She has a new boyfriend anyway."

She pursed her lips, refilling her now empty glass, "Fine."

"Can I go now?"

She nodded, taking a long drink, "Go. Leave your old decrepit mother."

He rolled his eyes and stood, muttering under his breath, "More like drunk."

She pulled the glass from her lips, "What was that?"

He turned to smiled at her, "I said I love you mother and thank you so much for letting me come home."

She smiled, touched, "Welcome home, son."

He rolled his eyes, disgusted as he turned back around, "I'm going out."

"Don't be too late!" she called after him.

**_FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER_**

Tristan stood once more on the Gellars' doorstep, scratching the back of his neck. Every year around this time her parents to a week long trip to Aruba, leaving Paris by herself, so he didn't have to deal with them. He glanced around the driveway. It looked as if all the help had gone home. But he did notice one car he didn't recognize.

He heard her coming to the door, talking heatedly with what sounded like a guy. Were she and Jess fighting? The door was thrown open suddenly and a very pissed looking Paris was in front of him. She froze, staring at him.

"Holy shit, Dugrey!" he glanced behind her to see Baker.

"Haulk! Dude, what the hell are you doing here?" he asked, walking over to his friend and pulling him into a manly hug.

"Student government meeting. You just missed Rory and Henry."

Tristan's eyebrows quirked slightly, "Oh yeah?" Baker nodded, "Well with the four of you running the class it's all gonna go to hell."

Baker laughed, hitting him in the arm, "Shut the fuck up."

He smirked, "Get a new ride?"

"Hell yeah. I totally wrecked my last one."

He laughed, turning to Paris and tilting his head; she hadn't moved since the door opened. "Hey Gellar. Don't I even get a hug?"

She looked him up and down cautiously, "You back?" He nodded slowly, "For good?" another nod. Her face melted into a grin and she jumped into his arms. He laughed, swinging her around before setting her back down.

"Wait." Baker interrupted them, "Back for good as in Chilton student?"

Tristan looked over at him, "As in."

"Damn man, why didn't you call anybody?"

"Cause I didn't want to make a big deal out of it."

"Tristan, man, you've been gone for like a year and the longest any of us have seen you for a week. This is a huge fuckin deal." he pulled out his phone, "I'm calling Blake."

"No, don't."

Baker looked up, surprised, "Why not?"

Tristan sighed, "I just don't want it to be a big deal. Don't tell anybody."

"Not even Louise, Blake or Rory?"

He shook his head, "I'll see them next Monday."

Baker sighed, rolling his eyes. He would never understand Tristan, "So then what are you gonna do all week?"

Tristan laughed, "Mmm. Sleep. See the difference between the track I was on in North Carolina and what track you guys are on."

Baker just shook his head, "Well good luck with that, man. But I have to go." his nose wrinkled as he whined, "It's my mom's birthday tomorrow and she says all she wants is for me to go to church. So I have to sleep cause I'm gonna wake up at nine."

Tristan smirked, "Night sleeping beauty."

He snorted, rolling his eyes, "Fuck you." he gave Paris a hug, "I'll see you later." he nodded to Tristan, smirking as he made his way out. The door was almost shut, but he poked his head back in, "Oh, and Dugrey?"

Tristan turned to face him, "Yeah?"

He grinned, "Good to have you back, man." and he closed the door.

Tristan turned to a smiling Paris. He stuck his hands in his pockets and looked around, rocking back and forth on his heels and toes. She laughed and hit him in the stomach lightly. Her eyes widened, "Damn Dugrey-" she poked his stomach, chest, and arms lightly, feeling his muscles, "Military School did something good for you."

He laughed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders as he led her deeper into the house, "You have no idea."

**_MONDAY, ONE WEEK LATER_**

Rory, Blake, and Shane stepped out of Blake's SUV after the breaking, stretching. They hadn't woken up this early in a week. Since Shane was a Freshman, and now that he was in highschool their mother's parents had decided it was time for him to attend Chilton with his siblings. And, to no one's surprise, he adapted just as well and quickly as the twins had. Rory sighed, rolling her neck to relieve the tension. She grabbed her bookbag from the passenger seat and slung one of the straps over her shoulder, making her way to the entrance. They bid goodbye to Shane, who entered the side of the building they'd attended last year. The lower classmen half with the Freshman and Sophomores. The side they attended now, the upperclassmen side held the Juniors and Seniors.

Blake held the door open for her and she smiled, "Such a gentleman."

"You know it."

Rory laughed and bid goodbye to her brother, making her way down the hall to her locker as he turned to find his. Her skirt swished four inches above her knee. The dress code actually only allowed it to be three inches from the knee, but she'd grown since the end of the summer when her mother hemmed her skirts. The clicking of her saddle shoes was drown out by the chatter of the students and her knee socks were driving her crazy, but she ignored it and loosened her tie. She'd stolen Blake's extra one and had been subject to his calling her Avril Lavigne for a week, but since he never got a reaction he'd stopped, later admitting that it actually looked better on her than most girls. Her sleeves were rolled to the bottom of her elbow and her blazer was thrown over her shoulder. Now that her shirts fit her better, she could actually roll the sleeves and they'd stay. Her shirt wasn't quite as tight as Madeline's and Louise's, but some how the two girls had convinced her and Paris that they were doing everyone a disservice by wearing the oxford shirts that weren't tight enough and by having their skirts hang nearly to their knees. And now as she passed Paris in the hall, she smiled to herself to think that they'd actually listened and both of their skirts were shortened and their shirts were tighter.

And now because all four of them had altered their uniforms, more girls were. But each of them had something individual about it. Rory wore one of the boy's ties and rarely had her blazer, Louise always had bare legs and heels, Madeline never wore a tie at all, refused to tuck in her shirt, and left it unbuttoned at the top, exposing a white cami, and Paris never wore a blazer and her sleeves were always rolled. But somehow, they all got away with breaking dress code everyday.

She was at her locker, balancing her bookbag on her knee as she shoved supplies into it when Adam walked up to her and took it. She turned to look at him, surprised. He held it open next to her, "You could ask for help, you know."

She rolled her eyes, hanging her blazer on one of the hooks inside before grabbing her coffee from the shelf and closing her locker. She took the bag back from him. "Thank you baby." she kissed him lightly and slung one of the arms over her shoulder again.

He wrapped his arm around her waist comfortably, "Mmm hmm." and led her down the hall to their first period.

_**SECOND PERIOD**_

Rory sat between Adam and Louise in the back right corner of the classroom, looking through her notes as the teacher was explaining the project they were about to start. Everyone was assigned a chapter that they wouldn't cover in the class. Groups of five or six. Each group had to have a ten minute presentation, a model, and a ten page paper. They had three weeks and would work on it for five days in class. Today was the first day. The teacher would assign the groups. Her group consisted of Louise, Henry, a kid named Parker, another guy named David, and herself. But she knew the two boys she didn't talk to were in the top of the Junior class, so she wasn't worried. Their chapter was on Alexander the Great. Easy.

The teacher told them to get in their groups and start on the project. When it became clear to their group that Rory and Louise weren't moving, the three boys made their way over to them and grouped their desks around the girls. They each picked a section and started reading. Hers was on his childhood and early military career. Not fun, but she read it anyway. They were twenty minutes into the class and most people had given up on reading and were talking. The teacher ignored them, if they didn't want to work on it during class they'd just have to do it on their own time.

She sighed, unable to concentrate with Henry and Louise talking right next to her. She crossed her right leg over her left and lowered her head, trying to concentrate, but she kept hearing random things. Apparently Louise and Baker were going to some new restaurant on Friday, but Henry advised against it. He'd gone there with lane and it hadn't been any good. When Alexander was a child he tamed a stallion that none of his father's soldiers could. Parker and his girlfriend weren't getting along and David told him to just break it off with her. She was a bitch anyway. Alexander was Aristotle's brightest student. Someone dropped a book on the ground loudly and Paris went off on him. He apologized and she heard him pick it up quietly as the door opened. When he was only 20 Alexander became king of Macedonia. The room slowly became quiet, only a few people talking quietly. He was an amazing strategist. Like, no one was talking. What the hell was going on? Alexander proved himself when he put down a revolt in-

"Tristan!" Rory was stopped mid thought and froze as Louise screamed and ran to the front of the room.

"Dugrey!" her brother spoke and she heard several desk slide a few inches along the tile as people stood from their desks and made their way to the front of the room.

"Hayden." she could hear the smirk in his voice. Oh God, please let it be a hallucination. Please don't let him really be there. And then she looked up. He was standing at the front of the room,  
surrounded by their friends. He was really there.

"Mister Dugrey."

He turned to look at the teacher, "Yes ma'am?"

"I've just assigned a group project and Miss Grant's group is one person short. You can be with them."

Rory closed her eyes. This wasn't really happening. This wasn't happening because this wasn't a movie and it wasn't a book. It was real life and things like this didn't happen in real life. She inhaled deeply and looked over at Adam. He was watching her uncertainly, glancing at Tristan every few moments. She gave him a weak smile and went back to reading. Well, that is to say she stared down at her textbook. She couldn't have focused now if her life depended on it.

"People, take your seats. Some students are trying to do their work."

Baker looked over at her, "Sorry Mrs. Keaton."

She nodded, "Just get back to your groups."

They all made their way back to their seats and Louise nodded towards the cluster of chairs she and Henry had come from. And that was when his breathing stopped. There she was. The bane of his existence and love of his life. The ever lovely Lorelai Leigh Hayden. And she was completely avoiding looking at him. She was staring holes into her textbook. Her right elbow was resting on the desk, her temple leaning on the heel of her hand while her left hand was resting in her lap and her legs were crossed. And he definitely noticed the alterations to her uniform. She was wearing a boy's tie, her blouse was tight, her sleeves were rolled and her blazer was no where to be seen. Not only that, but her skirt was riding low on her hips and had obviously been hemmed, because it had slipped halfway up her thigh while her legs were crossed. He pulled a desk over to the group. This couldn't be happening.

Rory heard him pull a desk up to the group and sit between Louise and Henry. She refused to look at him, but knew that he was staring at her. Jeez, there was only one 115 pound person between them. For the first time in nearly ten months they were breathing the same air. She could hear him talking to the group. They asked him about military school. Told him Chilton wasn't the same without him. She coughed lightly, unwantedly drawing their attention, but she still didn't look up. This was going to suck.

Tristan watched her cough quietly and knew that she hadn't been trying to get anyone's attention. He'd already pinpointed Adam. Oh yes, that would be the brunette who constantly glanced at his ex-girlfriend and was talking to Baker and Paris like they were the best of friends. That was the guy. He turned his attention back to studying Rory. She looked different, no doubt. Besides the obvious change of style, she'd filled out in the past year. She had more curves, softer curves. But she'd visibly lost weight. Not a lot, of course, but when you were as small as she was, every pound showed. Maybe she'd just shed all of her baby weight, because she definitely looked like a woman now. Unsurprisingly considering she was nearly seventeen.

The bell finally rang half an hour later and Rory released a breath she hadn't been aware she was holding. She shoved everything into her bookbag and stood, making her way to the door. She passed Louise, Henry, and Tristan and felt someone grab her wrist, stopping her. She turned, knowing it would be him. And she looked at him directly for the first time. He looked older. His face was slimmer, but his square jaw was still perfect. She bit her lip, sliding her wrist from his grip before slipping out of the room.

As soon as he, Henry, and Louise were out the door, the others caught up with them. "Dugrey, man, I didn't know you were coming back." Blake said, pulling him into a manly hug.

He smirked, "Of course I came back. I couldn't let you ladies run my school without me."

Baker rolled his eyes, "Loving the humility, man."

"I know, right?"

"Oh, hey dude, this is Adam Hart-" Blake put a hand on the boy's shoulder, "-Hart, this is Tristan Dugrey. I'm sure you've heard about him from like, everybody."

He nodded, shaking Tristan's hand, and both boys felt the pressure the other one exerted. They both knew exactly who the other was. "Nice to meet you, man."

Tristan nodded, "You too."

Adam looked down the hall, "Did any of you see where Rory went?"

"I think she headed off to her locker." Louise said, watching Tristan for a reaction, but was surprised when he didn't have one.

He nodded, "Well I think I'm gonna go find her. I'll catch you guys later. Tristan, it was nice meeting you."

"Yeah, you too man."

And Adam made his way down the hall. "So what do you have next?" Louise asked, snatching his schedule from him.

"Dr. Burnet."

Paris slipped her arm through his, "That's with me and Rory."

He glanced down at her, "Oh yeah?"

"Mmm hmm. And we better go cause he spits fire if you're late." The pair waved goodbye to their friends and made their way down the hall. "Are you glad to be back?"

He nodded, inhaling deeply as people stopped what they were doing to stare at him, "Hell yeah." Paris laughed lightly, tightening her grip on his arm. "So then that was Adam?"

"That was Adam."

"Hmm."

She looked up at him, "What?"

Tristan shook his head, "Nothing. He's taller than I imagined."

She laughed, "I bet."

They walked into the room and the teacher stopped them, "Tristan Dugrey?"

"Yes sir?"

"I'm Dr. Burnet. In this class we have assigned seats. You'll need to take the one behind Rory Hayden. It's our only open one."

He nodded, "Okay."

"And if you need any help, Paris sits next to Rory and they have my two highest averages, so you can just ask them if you're a little behind."

He nodded again, "Thank you sir."

The teacher hitched his jaw towards the empty desk and went back to grading papers. Tristan and Paris glanced at each other. He widened his eyes slightly, sighing, "This'll be fun."

She laughed sympathetically, patting his shoulder as they made their way to their seats. Rory was one of the last ones to make her way into the room. She leaned against the doorframe and laughed lightly with Adam. He grinned and kissed her forehead before bidding farewell and walking from the door. She turned to the room and her face immediately fell as she spotted him. Her bottom lip was pulled between her teeth as she glanced at the teacher before making her way slowly to her seat. And he hated himself for making her feel uncomfortable. He hated her for being with Adam. But looking at them...he knew that look. The way Adam looked at Rory. It was the same way he did. The guy really loved her. But she didn't love him back. He wasn't just disillusioning himself. He wasn't blocking out anything. He'd seen the way she'd looked at Adam. She didn't love her boyfriend.

Rory closed her eyes as she sat in front of Tristan. Their assignment was on the board. They were supposed to read the section before the teacher started the lesson. She pulled out her book, ignoring the rhythmic taps of Tristan's foot on the leg of her desk. He didn't even know he was doing it. God, he was killing her. Opening her book to page 398, she began reading and twirled a lock of her hair absentmindedly. She was perfectly aware that half of the class was gaping at the boy behind her as the bell rang. And she knew at least a fourth of them would be wondering if they were back together or how this whole seating arrangement would work out. However, never one to cause trouble, she was perfectly content ignoring him. But holy shit she could smell him. A mix of coffee (something she gave herself credit for addicting him to) and cologne. It was the same cologne he'd been wearing since she met him. She'd never smelled it on anyone else and honestly didn't know what brand it was. But that smell...just brought back memories. Ones she didn't want to revisit.

The class actually went by quickly. Dr. Burnet always lectured to the bell, so Rory didn't even have time for focus on Tristan...huh, yeah right. She'd barely been able to focus on the teacher with him behind her. But now it was lunch and she'd be able to sort out her thoughts. She was packing all her things together after the bell rang when the teacher called her to his desk. Annoyed but obedient, Rory made her way through the students milling out of the room. "Mister Dugrey, you stay as well." Tristan glanced at the teacher and then at Rory before slowly making his way over to the desk. "Tristan, I've talked to your Physics teacher at your old school and it seems that you were slightly off track with us. You're two chapters behind. Now, it shouldn't take long for you to catch up. Two weeks working after school at the most. Miss Hayden-" he turned to Rory, "-you and Paris Gellar have my two highest averages, and seeing as you are a bit more...sociable than Miss Gellar, I would like for you to tutor Tristan after school until he's caught up."

Her eyes widened slightly and she shook her head, "Dr. Burnet, I-"

But he cut her off, "No 'buts', Rory. I need for you to do this. I've heard from several teachers that you are able to help several students at one time without any of your grades suffering. I don't think an hour after school for two weeks is too much to ask."

"But Paris-"

"Has taken on more this year than she may be able to handle with student government and her numerous clubs. I would like for you to do this. You work with others much better than Paris."

She inhaled deeply, "Yes sir."

He nodded, "The two of you get a schedule worked out. Tristan you need to be caught up by our next test. It's a week from Friday." He went back to his papers, "Alright. You can go."

Without looking back at Tristan, Rory made her way out of the classroom and into the deserted hall. Everyone was at lunch. She heard Tristan leave the classroom and jog down the hall after her, but she continued walking. "Rory!" she ignored him, but didn't increase her speed. "Rory, come on." he easily caught up to her and grabbed hold of her wrist. She stopped walking and swallowed the lump in her throat, looking at the lockers as she ignored the way her wrist instantly warmed at his touch. "Rory." She acted like she hadn't heard him, but didn't try to remove her wrist from him. She heard him sigh in frustration, "Would you fucking look at me!"

She turned to look at him, her face unreadable. And he didn't know what to say. She'd never looked at him like that. Just...blank. She'd never shielded herself from him. "What?"

He dropped her wrist, running a hand through his hair, "Damn, is it that horrible to even be around me?"

Rory rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest as she looked away, swallowing hard. Why the hell was he doing this? "What do you want?"

"Why won't you talk to me?"

Her eyes widened slightly and she laughed humorlessly, "You have got to be kidding me." at the look on his face she shook her head, "Ten months." her face changed, "No, excuse me. Nine months, two weeks, and three fucking days, Tristan." She shook her head, running a hand through her hair, "Not even a phone call. One letter six months after you left was all I got. No explanation until Paris decided I needed to know why you left so that I could let go and stop hating you." he opened his mouth to protest, but she took a step closer, shaking her head, "Three weeks after you took my virginity you bailed. You could've at least given me a reason." he opened his mouth once again, but she went on, "I'm with Adam now, Tristan. And I'm happy. He loves me." she glanced at the lockers, sighing, "Four months was all it took. I was in love with you after two." she pursed her lips, shaking her head, "I slept with you after three, and it took me seven to get over it." She looked back at him, "And you're standing here asking why I don't want to talk to you? You're a little too late Tristan."

He shook his head, "No, I'm not-"

She cut him off, "Tristan-"

"You don't love him."

"I never said I did."

He put his hands up, "Then why the hell are you with him?"

"Because I like him."

"Rory-"

"No."

He took a step forward, "Just listen-"

She took a step back and put her hand up, stopping him, "Don't do this, Tristan."

He didn't move forward, but shook his head, "You don't love him."

"Don't you think I know that!" she yelled, surprising him, "Don't you think I realize that I'm hurting him? Don't you think I feel even the slightest bit of pain that I can't make myself love the guy that was there for me through all the shit with my mom and everything that went down this summer? Don't you think I wish that I could've gotten over you sooner so that he could at least trust me?" she shook her head in disbelief, "Tristan, I died the day you left, okay? I'm not who I was then. I was stupid and naive and I was wrong about a lot of things." she took a step closer, whispering, "Just don't make this harder than it has to be."

He opened his mouth, but she had already turned away, walking towards her locker without giving him time to speak. And he just sighed heavily, shaking his head before making his way to the cafeteria for lunch.

**This is over my head **

**But underneath my feet **

**Cause by tomorrow morning **

**I'll have this thing beat **

**And everything will be back to the way that it was **

**I wish that it was just that easy**


	30. This Broken Heart

_A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or_ This Broken Heart_ by Something Corporate_

**You woke up in pieces **

**From making these changes **

**Won't write you an anthem **

**On the outside I'm trying **

**Cause inside I'm dying **

**This broken heart was stronger then **

**Now I can't stand to part **

**With this broken heart**

Rory exhaled slowly, looking out at the scenery as Blake's Landrover sped down the freeway. She chewed on her bottom lip, her head against the window. Shane was in the back with his headphones on and Blake glanced at his sister, "So..." he said quietly, looking back to the road, "...he's back."

She sighed, not breaking her gaze from the trees along the highway, "Yes he is."

"How're you doing?"

Rory shrugged, blinking slowly, "I've been better."

Blake laughed uncomfortably, "Yeah, I bet."

She laughed as well, rolling her eyes at her brother, "He's coming over tomorrow."

"What? Why?"

"Physics teacher asked me to tutor him."

Blake laughed for real this time, "Shut up."

She smiled lightly, looking over at him, "For real. Me and Paris have his highest averages and since I'm more of a people person than she is he asked me to tutor Tristan."

"That sucks."

"Yeah."

"So what does Adam think of this?"

She shook her head, "I didn't even think about telling him." she looked back out the window, "I mean, I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that he's back. I really can't believe it."

Blake nodded, "I know what you mean."

"It's just..." she trailed off, inhaling deeply, "It's like he came out of nowhere. No warning. No call. Nobody knew."

Her brother just nodded, slowly, turning onto their exit, "So then he's coming over tomorrow?"

"Yeah."

"Time?"

"Five."

His face fell, "Oh."

"What?"

He shook his head, shrugging, "Nothing."

"Blake." she said slowly, looking at him.

He inhaled deeply, "It's just...I won't be home." he glanced at their brother in the rearview mirror, "And neither will Shane."

Her head cocked back, surprised, "What?"

"Yeah. I'm going to Maddy's at four thirty and Shane's going to his friends house to play paintball. I'm dropping him off on my way."

Her eyes widened, "But-"

"Sorry."

She shook her head, "I'm gonna kill you."

"Yeah, I know."

"Blake. . . . . . ." she whined, closing her eyes.

He laughed, "It'll be good, though."

Her eyebrow arched, "And how is that?"

"You two have a lot of shit to work out."

"Blake-" she warned, turning to face him.

He shook his head, "Seriously, Rory. You and Tristan need to get through this shit you two have. You'll both be miserable until you do." She rolled her eyes and looked back out the window, but didn't say anything.

**_NEXT DAY_**

Rory rolled her neck in a circle to relieve the tension. It was five and he wasn't here...at least his non-punctuality was still in place. She sighed, standing and going to the fridge to make sure they had drinks and food in case he was hungry. They did. The cook was really good about going to the market...which was definitely a plus for them because no one in their family ever went shopping. Whenever they went on vacation, they had coffee and doughnuts at the house for breakfast, and they'd eat out for the rest of the day. Sometimes they wouldn't even get the doughnuts...just the coffee.

She realized she was babbling in her head and sighed, looking over at the clock. 5:05. And then the doorbell rang. Rory stood, closing her eyes before slowly walking to the door. She opened it tentatively to see Tristan standing on the front step, looking around at the front yard while scratching the back of his head. He turned to look at her upon hearing the door open. Rory bit her lip and opened it wider, inviting him in. "Hey."

He glanced over at her, "Hey."

"Do you want anything to drink?"

He stepped into the foyer, shrugging off his jacket, "No thanks."

She nodded, closing the door, "You hungry?"

Tristan shook his head and hung his jacket over one of the arms of the coatrack, "I'm good."

"Okay then..." she looked around the foyer, "Uh, we'll work in the livingroom." He bit the insides of his cheeks, watching her as he nodded slowly. And looking at him right then, she knew it was a trait he'd picked up from Jess. The nodding like, 'okay, can we move on?'. And he knew it would annoy her. She rolled her eyes, "Come on, then." and made her way out of the room. He grinned, following her.

Tristan entered the livingroom to see her making her way over to the couch. Her books were already on the table. She sat in a whirl of dark hair and frustration. Frustration that he knew he was the root of. He tossed his own books on the table carelessly and dropped himself next to her. "So, what now, teach?"

She rolled her eyes before looking at him, he was doing this stupid '_the world can bite my ass, I don't care about you'_ act. "Did you use the same book at your old school?" He nodded silently, watching her. "And you only got to chapter four?" again he nodded silently. Rory shifted uncomfortably. Why was he just staring? "Did you finish chapter four?" another nod. "Okay, you can look somewhere else now." He smirked lightly, but didn't look away. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

He licked his bottom lip, breaking his gaze from her and picking up his book, "Just admiring."

She reached for her book as well, "Well don't."

"Oh, Mary, I can't help it."

Rory's gaze rose to him slowly, "Don't call me that."

"Why not?"

She shook her head, "Tristan, you can't keep using terms of endearment after you're broken up."

"Says who?"

"Says everyone. I'm not getting into this with you. Don't call me Mary."

He looked over at her, his smirk not falling, "But that's your name."

"You're not funny."

"Well then I guess it's a good thing that I'm not trying to be."

She rolled her eyes, standing up, "Fuck off, Tristan." and she made her way out of the livingroom.

He swore under his breath, standing up. He hadn't meant to piss her off. "Rory, wait up." he jogged out of the room. Coming into the hall, he looked around to see her ignoring him and walking upstairs. Shaking his head, he followed her, "Rory, seriously. Hold up. I didn't mean to be a dick."

She laughed humorlessly, not turning to face him as she continued upstairs, "Yeah right."

He caught up with her at the top and grabbed her wrist, turning her around to face him, "Seriously, Ror. White flag." She tilted her head, pursing her lips. "I was a dick." He released her wrist, "Truce?"

She bit her lip, shaking her head, "Tristan-"

He cut her off, "Look, you help me and I will be a perfect gentleman." Her eyebrow arched and he smirked, "What? I will."

She shook her head, "This was a really bad idea."

He turned her around and led her down the stairs, "And why is that?"

"Because we can't get along." she said simply. Tristan stopped walking and she turned to look at him, "What?"

He glanced down at her, "So then you accept the truce?"

She rolled her eyes, "Do I really have a choice?"

He shrugged. She had a point. "Well then I have a proposition."

Her eyebrow arched, "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Do tell."

He started walking back down the stairs and she joined him after a moment. "Do you really feel like working on physics?"

"No."

"Neither do I, and let's face it: with our current situation we wouldn't get anything done anyways." She nodded thoughtfully and he continued, "So today instead of working on that why don't we just talk?"

They were now at the bottom of the staircase and she stopped, her eyebrows furrowed as she turned to face him, "Talk?"

"Yes, talk. It's awkward with us and we both know it, so why don't we work through all our shit now and make it easier on ourselves?"

She thought it over for a moment. They never even got it together while they were dating. What the hell made him think they could function together now that they were broken up and hadn't spoken in nearly a year? She shook her head, "Tristan, I don't know..." she trailed off.

"Rory, come on. I really don't want to do physics." he whined, grabbing the end of her sleeve and pulling her into the livingroom, "Besides, we have a lot to work out. You avoided me all day today-" she opened her mouth to protest, but he cut her off, "-we'll never be able to stand in the same room unless we get this worked out."

She bit her lip, shaking her head. She could not get involved in him again. It would kill her. She pulled her sleeve from his grip, "I don't want to talk." she said quietly.

He stopped, turning to look at her and all amusement was suddenly gone, "Why not?" he wasn't mad. . . . . . .just curious.

She swallowed, looking away from him and blinking rapidly. They needed to get back to yelling and being mad. He couldn't look at her like that. He couldn't be cutesy and funny. They couldn't be like they used to. As long as she was mad she didn't have to feel. "Tristan. . . . . . " she trailed off, inhaling deeply.

She jumped in surprise as she felt his hands on either side of her face, "Rory." he said quietly,  
turning her head to face him. She adverted her gaze. He couldn't be doing this. She couldn't look at him. "Rory." he said again, just as gently. His thumb trailed along her cheekbone gently, "Look at me." he whispered. Without blinking her gaze came slowly to meet his and he could see tears in her eyes. "Rory, I'm here, okay? I am all here." he wiped away a tear that escaped, "I'm not going anywhere." She bit the insides of her cheeks, her eyelids fluttering as she looked away. The muscles in Tristan's jaw flexed as he checked the urge to kiss her and he removed his hands.

Rory rolled her eyes, pushing back tears, "Fine, let's talk."

_**HALF AN HOUR LATER**_

They sat on the couch, books forgotten on the coffee table as they hashed out the past year. They'd already covered Rory's relationship with Adam, Tristan's friends back in North Carolina, Lorelai's accident and recovery, and what had gone on with their friends here in Connecticut. Now they were sitting in a comfortable silence, Rory drumming her fingers on her soda can while Tristan glanced around the room. She fixed her eyes on the cushion between them, speaking quietly, "So then it really is true?"

He glanced over at her, "What is?"

"You left because of me." she looked up at him slowly, "Your parents made you leave because of me."

He looked down, shaking his head, "My dad gave me an ultimatum and I made a choice. Don't be so hard on yourself."

She turned to look at the wall directly in front of her, "Why didn't you just break up with me?"

He snorted lightly, shaking his head as he whispered under his breath, "You have no idea what you do to me."

She turned to face him, "What?"

He looked up, shaking his head, "I couldn't. I mean. . . . " he looked away, "I wanted to. Tried to a few times, but I couldn't."

"And now?" she asked quietly.

He scratched the back of his head, obviously not liking this topic, "Now I have to keep you two as acquaintances." She nodded slowly, neither speaking. He looked down at his hands and she looked at the coffee table. "So then, are you happy with him?" he asked.

She pursed her lips thoughtfully, "He's a really good guy, Tristan."

"But are you happy?"

Rory pulled her knees to her chest, "I'm content."

"Oh yeah?"

She nodded slowly, "Yeah." Tristan nodded as well, still not looking up at her. They sat in a comfortable silence, both thinking over the past, though neither would admit it. Finally after several minutes she spoke quietly, "Welcome home, Tristan."

He nodded, his gaze still on his hands, "Thanks."

_**FRIDAY**_

Rory sat in second period, Adam to her right, Pairs to her left, and Tristan behind her. After they'd talked Tuesday they were okay. . . . . . . .it was weird, them being okay. She was shocked that it only took an hour of talking for them to be comfortable after almost a year. She was still mad, of course. And he knew that. It would take her longer than a few days to get over what had happened.

Adam and Tristan didn't like each other, and it didn't take a brain surgeon to figure it out. They were both very territorial guys. Tristan probably had more of a right to be territorial of everyone. . . . . . . . in more ways than one. But Adam probably felt that he was entitled to things since he'd been there for months and Tristan hadn't. She watched them interact. It was tense and forced, and only happened when necessary.

At the moment she was turned sideways, facing Adam while they discussed their plans for this weekend. Katie Black's party that night, Craig Roberts was turning fifty on Saturday (they were both being forced to attend the party his wife was throwing for him), and dinner on Sunday. They were deciding what restaurant to go to when she felt Tristan's hand land on her side and stay there. She turned to look at him and saw that he was staring at his Physics book intently and had reached for her without thinking. He hadn't even realized that he was still touching her, "Hey Ror, can you explain this to me?" he asked, turning the book around so that she could read it.

He finally realized his hand was still on her side and removed it, looking up at her to see that she was intently reading the paragraph he'd pointed out. God, she was gorgeous. Her hair fell in front of her face in a sheet. She tucked it behind her ear slowly as she finished the last sentence and looked up at him, their faces were only three inches apart. He could feel her breath and smell her shampoo. It would've been so easy to lean forward and kiss her, but he couldn't. What he really wanted to do was look over at Adam and see his reaction, but he was too distracted by the way her lips were moving and her eyes were locked with his. He nodded every time she paused or said, "Understand?" It took a few minutes of her lovely mouth in constant motion until she stopped talking and asked, "You get it now?"

He blinked slowly, glancing down at the book. Was she done? He hadn't heard a word she'd said. "Yeah. Thanks." She grinned before laughing lightly and turning back around in her seat. He looked up at the back of her head and swore at himself. He'd just have to figure it out on his own.

Adam watch their interaction, his jaw tightening. He didn't want to be mad. He didn't want to be jealous, but he saw the way Tristan was looking at Rory. He wasn't listening to anything she was saying. He was just watching her. Had he only asked her to help him so that she'd give him some attention? Pathetic. Of course, staying with a girl that didn't feel half of what he felt might make him pathetic as well. He was about to lean over to her and continue planning out the weekend, but the bell rang. They all stood and threw their things in their bags.

"Adam, Rory, you guys going to Katie's party tonight?" Louise asked, standing up.

"Yeah." she answered, not looking up as she zipped her bookbag.

Louise nodded, smirking as she turned to the blonde behind Rory, "Dugrey?"

He smirked as well, "Louise, baby, what kind of party would it be if I wasn't there?"

Paris laughed, standing up, "Well, we're all anxious to see how your first party back will be."

"All the freshmen trying to pull you upstairs." Madeline grinned, standing as well.

"All the upperclassmen trying to fuck you on the dance floor." Louise supplied, laughing at the look on his face.

"Good luck with that." Rory said, grinning as she stood from her seat. He looked over at her, his jaw dropping playfully.

"You mean all four of you would stand by and let them attack me?"

Rory laughed, throwing her bookbag over her shoulder as she made her way through the desks to the door. Paris grinned, "We might save you after a couple hours."

"Mean." he said quietly, shaking his head at them.

Madeline laughed, patting his arm gently as she, Louise and Paris made their way from the room. Rory, Adam, and Tristan were the last ones to leave. "Mister Hart, I need to talk to you about your homework from last night." the teacher called.

He glanced down at Rory and she leaned up, kissing him lightly, "I'll see you at lunch."

He nodded, "Bye baby." He glanced up at Tristan, shooting him a dirty look over Rory's head. The blonde held his hands up innocently and walked out of the classroom with Rory.

They were halfway to their lockers before either spoke. "So." Tristan said slowly, "You are going to the party?"

She nodded, "That's the plan."

He bit the insides of his cheeks thoughtfully, "Huh."

"What?" she glanced up at him as she stopped at her locker.

He pursed his lips loosely, shaking his head, "Nothing." she just gave him a look and he shrugged, "We've had some fun at parties, that's all. They've been very enjoyable experiences in the past. I'm just looking forward to it."

She narrowed her eyes warningly , "Tristan."

"What? We used to have a lot of fun-"

She cut him off as she opened her locker, "Don't."

"I'm not doing anything."

She sighed, shaking her head. Every time they made any progress he made them slip back, "Yes you are. Don't think I didn't see the way you and Adam were looking at each other."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

She smirked. If he could be a dick, she could be a bitch. "You can't stand it."

His eyes narrowed dangerously, "Can't stand what?"

"To see me with Adam. It kills you."

"Oh, what? The Beave?"

"Don't be a jackass." she snapped, pulling books out of her locker.

His eyebrow arched, "What? You don't think he'd fit in with the Cleavers?"

"Stop."

"-cause I think he'd fit in very nicely-"

"Tristan!"

He leaned with his arm against the locker next to hers, smirking, "Oh yeah, pain." he laid his hand over the left side of his chest sarcastically. But he could've sworn he was feeling it crack beneath his palm. Why was she being like this? Yeah, the party comment had been low, but this was below th belt.

She rolled her eyes, "Nice sarcastic act.. I know it really does hurt you. You can't stand to see me happy with him."

He wanted to hate her. He really wanted to just go numb, but he couldn't. Not anymore. He'd been numb for years before he'd met her. And now. . . . . . .he couldn't have felt more if he'd tried. But he could always make her think he didn't. "Happy and returned to your previous state of purity."

She closed her locker and twirled around to face him, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

He pushed himself off the locker and leaned forward, whispering, "Either you guys never make it to the bedroom, or else he doesn't fuck you the way I did." Her jaw dropped slightly. She couldn't believe he'd just said that. He'd never said anything like that to her. Upon her silence his eyebrows arched, "Ah, so it's the first one, then?" She wanted to slap him, but didn't get the chance when he stepped forward and pressed his body against hers, trapping her against the locker with her hands pinned at her sides. He trailed his index finger along her neck, looking down at her in a way that scared her and made her blush at the same time. His eyes were dark and clouded. . . . . .guarded. But they didn't leave hers. "Rory, I've never had to be cruel to you. You've never seen the way I used to be." He leaned down, whispering in her ear so she could feel his breath on her neck. "I was different before you came around. Don't make me revert back to it." She wanted to hate him, wanted to push him away. It wasn't supposed to feel this way. She wasn't supposed to feel safe and warm while he was being an ass. But she couldn't help it, it felt right. . . . . . so she didn't push him away. "Don't make me show you." he whispered, checking the urge to kiss her neck before he pulled away.

He took a step back and she glared at him before picking up her bookbag, "You're a dick."

Tristan smirked, his eyes raking over every inch of her body, "Oh yeah?"

She shook her head, not bothering to folded her arms over her chest as she saw the way he was looking at her. It would only encourage him. "I can't believe I ever dated you."

His gaze rose to meet hers, "It was the sex." She just gave him a disgusted look before turning to walk in the other direction. He licked his bottom lip before pulling it between his teeth. Oh how he loved to watcher her walk away, "I'll se you tonight. . . . . . .Mary." he called down the hall, not bothering to wait and see if she turned around before heading to their next class, knowing she would ignore him for the rest of the day.

**Can't make this right **

**You see on my face **

**That I'm not gonna be alright, not tonight **

**You can read all my letters **

**But that won't mean things are fine **

**Nothing this time. . . . . . . . . .**

**This broken heart was stronger then **

**Now I can't stand to part with this **

**This broken heart was stronger than **

**The word I wish you never meant**


	31. The Pros and Cons of Breathing

**A/N:I don't own _Gilmore Girls, Citizen Kane,_or _The Pros and Cons of Breathing_ by Fall Out Boy**

**Bury me standing under your window **

**With this cinder block in hand **

**Yeah, cause no one will ever feel like this again **

**And if I could move **

**I'm sure It would only be to crawl back to you **

**I must've dragged my guts a block **

**They were gone by the time we talked**

Rory glanced over at Lane before pulling a shirt over her head. Her best friend's jaw was almost brushing the ground, her own shirt dropped to the floor and forgotten, "You're kidding, right?" when Rory's head poked through the top of the shirt she just shook it, rolling her eyes. "I cannot believe he said that. What a jerk."

"Yeah. Then he called me Mary again after I told him not to and we made the truce and everything." She ran her hands through her hair, pushing it out of her face, "I mean, what did I do to make his hate me?"

Lane bit her bottom lip, pulling half of her chest-length hair up, "Maybe it's easier for him."

Rory turned to face her, "What?"

She sighed, "Maybe it's easier for him to be a dick than to admit that it really does bother him."

She shook her head, "But it doesn't." she rolled her eyes, throwing a pillow against the wall in frustration, "And even if it did it would only be because he's possessive and someone else has me, not because he actually misses me." Lane turned back towards the mirror, laughing. Rory's eyebrow arched, "What?"

She watched her in the mirror and shook her head, "Either you two never make it to the bedroom or else he doesn't fuck you the way I did?" she laughed again, "Rory, how can you not think that's funny?"

The brunette shook her head, exasperated, "Lane, I cannot believe you!"

"What?" her laughter slowly, "Rory, come on, when you're not so pissed think about it. It was a good one." she turned back to the mirror and secured her hair with a black elastic, "Are you ready?"

She rolled her eyes and stood up, "Yeah."

_**PARTY**_

Rory's tan Landrover slid down the Black's street and she was forced to park in front of the house because of the number of cars. The two girls got out and Rory locked the doors before sliding the keys into her back pocket. She despised carrying around purses and absolutely refused to do it. They linked their arms together and walked up the driveway, still discussing her run in with Tristan in the hall. There were already half drunken Chilton students swarming the house and yard, and they let themselves into the front door.

Rory led Lane to the basement where she was positive at least one of their friends would be playing pool. And she was proven right when, upon entering the bottom level of the house, Baker was leaning over the side of the pool table and Jess could be seen with a stick. They walked over and Rory gave Jess a hug. "Hey."

He smiled over at two of his oldest friends, "Hey."

"Have you seen Blake or Adam?"

Jess hitched his jaw towards the stairs, "I think Blake's playing beer pong with Tristan."

She snorted, rolling her eyes, "Dork."

"And last time I saw Adam he was with them."

"Thanks." she flashed him her award winning smile and shrugged one shoulder before prancing out of the basement.

Jess smirked at her back before turning to a wide eyed Lane, "What the hell was that about?" he asked, laughing lightly. She just shook her head before grinning at her best friend. They never understood the twins.

Rory bounced up the stairs, her body probably consisting of 80 caffeine rather than water. She'd been drinking coffee all day and had recently become addicted to energy drinks because of Louise. She was probably frying her nerves, but didn't really care as she entered the dining room and spotted her brother, ex-boyfriend, and current beau. Her brother tossed the ping pong ball towards Tristan's cups. It hit the rim, but didn't get into the cup. He swore loudly and Tristan laughed, taking it out and landing it in one of Blake's. "Oh, bitch." Tristan smirked at him.

"Fuck you." The older twin smirked and picked up the cup, chugging it quickly before tossing it to the ground. They'd each started with fifteen cups, but Blake was now had three in front of him and Tristan had four.

Rory rolled her eyes and made her way over to Adam. She leaned up and kissed him gently,  
"Hey baby."

He grinned at her, "Hey."

Rory turned to watch the two boys at the table. She shook her head, "Wow."

"Yeah." he laughed, turning back to watch them, "This is their second round." He looked back down at her, "They're just a little tipsy."

Her eyebrow arched, not taking her eyes off of them, "Just a little."

"When did you get here?" he asked, wrapping his arm around her waist.

"Ten minutes ago." she answered as the crowd cheered. She looked over to see Tristan land the ball in Blake's last cup. The blonde still had two in front of him. Her brother swore before picking up the last cup and draining it.

Adam shrugged, "They're even now. Blake won the last one."

"Well hopefully they won't try a tie breaker. I don't think they'd be able to stand up."

Adam watched the two old friends stagger as they exited the room. "Or avoid alcohol poisoning." Rory grinned up at him before laughing and resting her head against his shoulder. He tightened his grip on her and pulled her into the livingroom. "Let's dance."

She groaned, following him. She hated dancing. "Adam. . . . ."

He pulled her to him, grinning as his forehead pressed against hers, "Rory. . . . . ." he twirled her around and pulled her back against him. She laughed, kissing him slowly and grinding against him to the beat of the music.

Tristan sat on the couch, watching Rory and Adam with narrowed eyes. She looked happy, but he knew she wasn't. She'd completely ignored him after second period. He knew he'd crossed the line, but hadn't been able to help it. She drove him crazy. . . . . . . . . talking about her relationship with Adam like that. Where did she get off being a bitch like that? He rolled his head in a circle, trying to relieve the tension. Each cup had been filled with half a beer, so he had fourteen in his system. Not the most he'd ever drank at once by any means, but enough to make him stumble when he walked and slur his words. He barely even noticed when some girl he vaguely recognized sat next to him. He glanced over at her, smirking, "Hey. . . . . Anna. . . " he trailed off, not positive that was her name.

She grinned, leaning forward. Well, if it wasn't she didn't correct him. "Hey Tristan. Welcome back."

"Thank you." he flashed her his brightest smile.

Fifteen minutes later they were interrupted by someone clearing their throat. He ignored it at first, but after being kicked in the shin he decided to break his face from. . . . . . .Anne? Annie? Anna? Something. He looked up to whoever it was that obviously had some very pressing matter that held more weight than his drunken tonsil hockey. "Can I help you, Paris?"

She rolled her eyes, arms crossed over her chest, "Back to random chicks at every party, I see?"

Ann. . . . . . he wasn't even going to bother trying to think of her name. . . . stood, "I'll see you around Tristan."

He wiggled his fingers at her, grinning as she walked away. He turned back to Paris, "Why do you have the incessant need to disrupt my fun?" She rolled her eyes and he patted the cushion next to him, "Have a seat, darling." She just arched her eyebrows, hands on her hips. His head cocked back, "Fine. Stand. What can I do for you?"

She just shook her head, "Reverting back to the old days? You'd made so much progress."

"I wouldn't mind not having a random whore, but the person who made me make so much progress is just a little preoccupied." his eyes burned into hers.

She rolled her eyes, grabbing his hand, "Come with me."

He smirked, following her, "Paris, doll, Jess is one of my best friends, and while I would love to-"

She cut him off, "Enough, Tristan. You're drunk." she said, pulling him out the front door.

He snorted, "I wish."

She glanced over at him as she led him down the driveway and to the sidewalk that went all around the high end neighborhood, "What?"

He shook his head, "Nothing." He wasn't drunk. He could never get drunk enough to burn the taste of her out of his mouth. The feel of her skin from his fingers. The smell of her sweat from his memory. The sight of her with Adam from his mind.

Paris sighed as they started down the sidewalk, "I know you're not happy."

He glanced over at her, "Why do you say that?"

"Because I've known you since we were in diapers and I know when you're unhappy.

"I'm fine."

"Tristan, why are you doing this? You're just hurting yourself."

He shook his head, "Oh no. No I'm not. She's got that one under control."

"She might be hurting you, but you're not making it any easier on yourself."

"What are you talking about?"

"The drinking-"

"It's a party, Paris!"

"Yes, but you've been drinking every night since you got back. Don't think I don't know." He rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything and she continued, "The drinking. The girls. The fighting."

"Fighting?"

"With Rory in the hall today. Oh, and way to play dirty, Tristan." she didn't sound mad, but actually kind of impressed.

He turned to look at her, "She told you about that?"

Paris smirked, "No, I, along with half of the Junior class, saw you push her against the lockers in the middle of the hall this afternoon." He just looked ahead of him, emotionless. "I asked her about it and she just said that you were being a dick."

He nodded, "Very kind of her."

"What did you say?" He shook his head. Looking forward as they walked. He might have been an ass to Rory about her sex life with Adam, but he had no idea if she'd slept with him or not. His bet was on yes, simply because they'd been together for eight months. He hoped to God they hadn't, though. That would have killed him. More than hearing her tell him that she hated him. More than seeing her with Adam. Knowing that someone else had touched that part of her would have killed him. "Tristan, come on, what'd you say?"

He sighed, shaking his head, "A lot of stuff."

She bit her lip, linking her arm though his, "Tristan, hurting her because it's easier than fighting for her isn't going to help you."

He shook his head, "I can't fight for her, Paris."

She looked over at him, "Why not?"

He stopped, "What good would it do? We can't be together. You know she's the whole reason I had to leave." he looked up at the moon, shaking his head, "If I fight him for her it would only be to lose her cause I'd be on a one way to North Carolina and I'd never come back."

"Well you two talk an awful lot for two people who know they shouldn't."

He shook his head, "I can't help it, Paris. I'm drawn to her. It's like no matter how much I want to hate her for all this, I just can't. No matter how much we piss each other off or hurt each other we always wind up together. In the hall, in class. I mean, even at lunch out seats wind up being next to each other." He shook his head, "It's not on purpose, it's like we just can't not talk." he sighed, shoving his hands into his pockets, "And then half the time when we do talk we wind up yelling and hurting each other and then we're back to square one."

Paris bit her lip, not looking at him, "Well you guys can't keep going along the way you are."

"Then what do you suggest?"

She shrugged, walking again, "I don't know. All I know is that you two need to do something because if you keep fighting like this it's gonna break all of us apart."

He closed his eyes before following her and wrapping his arm around her comfortably, "I know."

_**NEXT NIGHT**_

Rory sat in the ballroom of the Roberts' home. Yes, that is correct, a ballroom in the house. She'd rarely been to houses from the people in society that were this nice or showy. At the moment she was at a table with Louise and Paris, watching as people danced. Dinner had already been served and the guest of honor's brother had already made the toast. Now it was just dancing for another hour and a half and then they could go. Adam was with his father and being forced to talk business. He shot her a small smirk from across the room and she grinned, looking away. And her gaze fell on Tristan. He was with his grandfather Janlan. The one he said had asked about her. The two Dugrey men were conversing with Baker, his father, and Louise's father. The two teenagers had their hands down in their pockets and were obviously listening intently. That was something about Tristan, every time his grandfather spoke, he listened. Really listened. He cared what the old man had to say. He loved his grandfather, Rory had always known. He was the only member of Tristan's family that he really loved.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she felt her mother's fingers clench around her upper arm. She looked up to see her grandmother leading Lorelai through the floor. She dragged her daughter out of her chair. "What are you doing?" she whispered, following them because she was forced to.

"Bringing you with me so I don't kill my mother." she replied through gritted teeth.

"What was that, Lorelai? You really must speak up." she turned and saw her granddaughter, "Oh Rory, how nice to see you."

She smiled, ripping her arm from her mother's death grip, "Hi grandma." She turned to her mother, speaking quietly, "Where are we going?"

"We're making the rounds." she said airily, mocking Emily, who didn't hear. And so she was dragged around the room to talk to people who remembered when she was 'this tall' and lowered their hand until it hovered around their knee. But then her family had moved to Stars Hollow and they hadn't seen her again until last year, and oh, how she'd grown. She was beautiful, just like her mother and grandmother. She listened to the practiced compliments politely, nodding and thanking them when it was appropriate.

After fifteen or twenty minutes she let her gaze wander around the room. They were now with one of Richard's old business partners and his wife, the guest of honor and his brother, and Tristan's grandmother. She noticed that Janlan's wife made a point to speak to her, smile at her, lay a delicately aged hand on her arm. She wondered why his grandparents were so kind to her when his parents hated her.

Just a few moments ago her father had whisked away her mother, claiming that he hated to steal her but Mr. Nelson was dying to catch up with Lorelai. So she'd been left alone with her grandmother, but didn't really mind at all.

Now they were discussing how fast time seemed to go by and Rory was dazing out. She looked around the room, her eyes falling on her grandfather Hayden who was now in the circle with Tristan and Baker. Her gaze fell on the blonde and he looked up, feeling her. Their eyes locked. She chewed on the inside of her cheek, her arms crossed over her chest. The shadow of a smirk hooked the corner of his lips, but it wasn't full blown. Wasn't noticeable to anyone but her. She ran her right hand through her hair, pulling it out from behind her ear. His grandfather said something to him and he kept eye contact with her for another moment before looking at the old man.

"Rory?"

She felt herself flush and turned to her grandmother, "Yes ma'am?"

She laced her arm through her granddaughter's and they left the small cluster of people after bidding farewell, "Come on, keep moving. We still have a lot of people to talk with."

She sighed and followed the older woman. How did she always get pulled into these things? She glanced around the room, trying to spot Adam when they stopped. She looked at the group in front of her and was met with only male faces. Including two her own age. She cringed inwardly as her grandmother positioned her right next to Janlan Dugrey. She spoke to him without disrupting the conversation of the entire group, "Hello Janlan, how are you this evening?" she asked, taking his hand.

The old man turned to look at her and grinned, "As well as ever, Emily. And yourself?"

"Never better."

He turned to the young girl next to him and his grin widened, "Ah, and I'm graced with a beauty I haven't had the pleasure to see in far too long." he took Rory's hand and she smiled at him, surprised, but glad that he remembered her, "How are you, Rory?"

"I'm wonderful, Mr. Dugrey. How was your birthday? I'm so sorry I missed it."

He waved his hand as if it was nothing, "Nothing to apologize for, darling. It was wonderful though, thank you for asking."

Baker's father addressed her, "So, Rory, I hear you're in the class presidency with Baker."

She turned to him, "Yes sir."

"Vice president?"

"Yes."

"That's a lot of responsibility."

"At times, but usually I just have to sit back while Paris dictates."

Baker's father laughed lightly, "The Gellar women are very strong willed, aren't they?"

She smiled politely, "Only in the best way, Dr. Haulk." He smiled, agreed, and turned to Strobe to discuss golf at the club tomorrow. Rory chewed the insides of her cheeks, not listening to her grandmother and Janlan discussing the charity dinner for something or other. She looked up at Tristan and Baker, who were standing next to each other in the circle. Baker had been pulled into the discussion between his father and her grandfather and wasn't paying attention to her. She thought he didn't know she was looking, but his eyes darted towards her and he smirked, then winked before shaking his head minutely. She tilted her head, her eyes narrowed in confusion. His grin widened and he returned to the conversation involving golf. She shifted her teeth, releasing the insides of her cheeks as her gaze fell on the blonde next to him.

It shouldn't have surprised her that he was watching her. . . . . his eyes fixated on her face as a smirk graced his perfect lips. She bit her lip, sliding behind his grandfather. Instinctively, the man moved closer to Emily so they could carry on their conversation easier. She slid in between the grandfather and grandson and faced the younger, arms folded over her chest, "Can I help you?"

His grin widened, eyebrow arching, "Is that an honest offer?"

She just shook her head, she'd walked right into that one, "You never change, Dugrey."

He nudged her with his shoulder lightly, "You're not so different yourself."

Rory laughed and opened her mouth to say something else, but was interrupted as Tristan's grandmother came over. Of course, she suggested that the two of them dance because she just loved this song and she never got the opportunity to watch her grandson put his ballroom lessons to good use. They both started to decline, but when Emily, Janlan, and Strobe encouraged them, they were forced to oblige. Baker snorted with laughter lightly and both glared at him. He held his hands up apologetically before laughing again.

Tristan sighed and grabbed Rory's hand, leading her onto the floor. "Tristan." she hissed, grabbing his other hand into her free one. "I don't know how to ballroom dance. I took lessons from Miss Patty when I was like, eight, but I don't remember anything."

He squeezed her hand encouragingly, "Just follow my lead." Her eyes were wide and every muscle in her body was tense when they stopped on the floor. He rested his left hand on her waist and took her hand with his right. She laid her right hand on his shoulder and he locked eyes with her, moving slowly at first as he counted for her while they moved.

Eventually bits and pieces of it came back to her and she was able to move with him so that she didn't completely ruin the dance. He was an amazing dancer, though. She knew that he'd taken years of etiquette, cotillion, and ballroom dancing, but hadn't been aware that he actually paid attention. But he could lead her, amazingly because she had absolutely no rhythm. Of course when she'd told him that before he'd smirked, winked, and told her that he begged to differ. Maybe she couldn't dance, but she certainly had rhythm.

"Head up." he said quietly. She looked into his eyes to see that he'd been watching her closely. She hadn't even realized that she'd been looking down. He really was an amazing dancer. Her thoughts trailed off as she stared into his eyes, both of them with straight faces. Neither of them found any amusement in their current situation. She didn't get it. It was like one day they could be horrible to each other and say everything they knew to hurt each other, and then the next day they were fine. Nothing weird. Nothing awkward. It was confusing, and she hated being confused.

Tristan could tell that she was deep in thought, and he grinned, she looked so cute whenever she was running away with a thought. She blinked as he grinned. "What?"

"Penny for your thoughts?"

She laughed, "Oh-" he twirled her out and brought her back, "-nothing important. Just that it's amazing how you can actually lead me with my two left feet."

"You're not that bad of a dancer." she just gave him a look and he laughed lightly, "Well you're not horrible."

She laughed, rolling her eyes, "Thanks."

"But see, that's why you're lucky to be a woman, you just have to follow and look gorgeous."

"Oh no, I have to do everything you're doing, but in heels."

He rolled his eyes, "Poor Ginger."

"Arrogant Fred."

Tristan just looked down at her for a moment before laughing and shaking his head, "Touche." She smiled as he spun her around once more before the song ended. He nodded, smirking, "Well Miss Hayden, thank you for the dance."

She grinned, nodding her head as well, "Thank you." she hooked her arm in his as they made their way back to their grandparents. Their grandmothers were watching them with a mix of awe and surprise. Their grandfathers were nodding softly, watching the couple closely. Louise had joined the group and was on Baker's arm, both of them watching Rory and Tristan closely, looking at them with an emotion neither could place.

They stood in silence for a moment, everyone in the group looking at them. Emily shook her head slowly, "Rory, darling, I didn't know you could dance."

"I know a little, Tristan can lead anyone, though."

Emily turned to the blonde and smiled, "Tristan, you're a wonderful dancer."

He smiled charmingly, "Thank you, Emily."

Rory felt fingers curl around her elbow and turned to see that Louise had snaked her way over to her. "Excuse me, can I borrow Rory for a second?"

The two older women nodded their consent and Rory smiled politely as her friend pulled her from the group. "What?" she asked as soon as they were out of earshot.

"First off, I didn't know you could dance. Very good. Second: you have serious damage control to do." she said as they made their way to the other side of the room.

"Damage control?" she asked, confused.

"Adam. He was watching you two the entire time with his jaw sweeping the floor." she nodded to the curly haired boy and continued pulling Rory, "You might want to explain that it was your grandmothers' idea." she whispered as they came to Adam, who had yet to completely close his mouth with the aftermath of his shock. Louise pulled her arm from Rory's and patted Adam's shoulder quickly before turning. She shot her friend a weak smile before walking away.

Rory looked up at Adam, shifting her feet self consciously. "Hey." she said quietly.

He looked up at the dance floor, "What. . . . " he trailed off.

"Our grandparents asked us to."

He looked down at her, shaking his head slowly, still disbelieving, "I thought you hated him."

"Why would you think that?"

"Because two days ago you were complaining about what a dickhead he is."

She bit her lip, "I don't hate him."

Adam swore, running his hand through his hair before looking her in the eye, "Do you want to be with him?" She looked him in the eye as well, flexing her fingers. No one had asked her that one yet. She clenched her hands, biting the insides of her cheeks as she shook her head slowly. She couldn't force herself to say it. "Do you really want to be with me?" he asked quietly, his eyes boring into hers. The pressure of her teeth on the inside of her cheeks intensified as she nodded slowly. She didn't know why she was doing it. Maybe because he was safe. Maybe because she really cared about him. She wondered if Tristan was hurting, if he was confused. She wanted to look over at him, but wouldn't allow herself to. He was killing her. Adam watched her uncertainly before speaking softly, resigned, "Okay. Do you want to take a walk?"

She crossed her arms over her chest, looking away, "Yeah."

Tristan watched them walk out and swore under his breath. He hated her sometimes. The way she made him feel. . . . . .like maybe she really cared, and then she'd leave with her boyfriend. He didn't know who was hurting worse, but she was killing him. She kept trying to forget. Kept trying to act like they'd never meant anything to each other, and as he watched her walk out, he knew she'd never be able to do it. He turned away from the door. He didn't even want to know. It was bad enough that she was still with Adam, but he would drive himself crazy imagining what they were doing.

_**THAT NIGHT, DUGREY'S**_

As soon as the front door closed Tristan's mother turned on him, "What the hell was that?"

He turned to look at her lazily, "What?"

She shook her head, tossing her purse on the table in the foyer, "Tristan, I thought we discussed this. You are not to have anything to do with the Haydens."

He rolled his eyes, "Mom, our grandparents are friends and we were both with them. They wanted us to dance together. It was harmless."

"Tristan," she said mockingly, stepping closer, "I told you not to. It doesn't matter what your grandparents say. They're not the ones who have the authority to say whether you live in Connecticut or North Carolina." His jaw clenched, but he didn't say anything back. She rounded on her husband, "Arthur, talk to your parents."

His nose wrinkled, "Why?"

"Because they constantly undermine us when it comes to Tristan. They know perfectly well why he was sent off and yet they insist on throwing the two of them together."

Tristan cut in, "It's because they know the whole idea it stupid-"

She turned and cut him off, "Tristan!" he stopped and she stepped closer, "I told you, do not get involved with the Haydens again." he rolled his eyes and she put two of her fingers under his chin, forcing him to look at her, "Listen to me." he locked eyes with her. Identical shades of blue. It'd been generous of her to give them to him, "Stay away from Lorelai Leigh Hayden. I don't care what your grandparents tell you to do or ask of you. I understand that in school you've been put in a group project together and one teacher has asked her to tutor you. I understand that. I don't care, but let it go beyond schoolwork and you'll regret it. You've always brushed off my threats and punishments and your grandparents have always ignored my wishes. I'm tired of it. If I hear anyone saying that you two have gotten back together or you're giving her any special attention and they can prove it to me, you will have a one way ticket to Riverside Military Academy in Georgia. You won't be going back to North Carolina and you will be graduating high school in the south." he stared back at her, emotionless, "Understand?" He didn't reply. "Tristan?" she said softly.

"Yes ma'am."

She patted his cheek lightly, "Good."

"Can I go to my room now?" he hissed, swallowing the lump in his throat.

She nodded, waving her hand towards the stairs, "By all means. Go."

He jerked away from her and headed towards the stairs, passing his father who just watched the interaction, emotionless. Tristan closed his eyes as he started upstairs. And people wondered how he'd turned out this way.

_**THAT NIGHT, HAYDEN'S**_

The guys were all asleep while Rory and Lorelai sat on the couch in the livingroom, watching _Citizen Kane_. She couldn't focus on the movie, though. She needed to tell her mother she wasn't a virgin. Sometimes she hated being so close to her family. She could get away with anything, but her conscience would never let her rest. They watched as Charles fired Jedediah and Rory bit her lip, closing her eyes as she turned to her mother, "Mom."

"Yeah sweetie?" she asked, keeping her eyes on the television.

"Can I talk to you?" she asked, pausing the movie.

Lorelai's eyebrows furrowed together as she looked over at her daughter, "Of course. What's wrong?"

She bit her lip, "Mom, I. . . . . " she trailed off, shaking her head, she had no idea how to say it.

"Ror?"

"I'm not a virgin."

Lorelai's eyes widened as her head cocked back, "Oh." obviously that hadn't been what she'd expected to hear, "Oh." she nodded slowly, trying to find something to say, "You were safe?" Rory nodded mutely, "Okay, good." she said awkwardly, turning her body to face her daughter, "When did this happen?"

Rory inhaled deeply. She wasn't freaking out. That had to be a good sign. "A while ago."

"Oh." she watched her daughter, looking over her face, "So then you and Adam?"

Her head snapped up to her mother, "No."

Lorelai nodded, "So then it was Tristan?"

"Yeah."

She bit the insides of her cheeks, "Before he left?" Rory looked up at her mother, confused. Lorelai went on, "I mean, it hasn't been since he got back?"

"Oh." she shook her head slowly, "No. It was before he left for Military School."

Lorelai nodded, exhaling slowly, "And he was good to you? He was gentle?"

Rory nodded slowly, "Yeah, mom. He was really gentle."

Lorelai looked over at the coffee table, "I figured you had." she looked over at her, "And you and Adam?"

Rory shook her head, "No."

"Are you going to?"

Again she shook her head, "No."

Lorelai nodded, "Okay."

Rory pulled her legs to hr chest, "You're not mad?"

"What difference would it make if I was?" Rory cringed and Lorelai sighed, "I'm not mad. I wish you would've told me sooner, but I'm not mad." She played with the hem of her shirt, "But you were safe, right? You used a condom?"

Rory ran her hand through her hair, "I'm on birth control."

"How?"

"There's a teen-"

"Aces." her mother cut her off, nodding slowly.

Rory nodded, her mother had probably used the same clinic when she was a teenager. It wasn't free, but they never contacted your parents. "Yeah. Aces."

Lorelai looked her square in the eye, "Birth control won't prevent an STD. Does he get tested?"

Rory nodded slowly, "Every six months."

"You two didn't date for six months. Did he sleep with anyone right before you got together?"

She rested her chin on her knee, "No. And he got tested a month after we started dating. It just worked out that way."

Lorelai nodded slowly, visibly resigned, "Okay."

Rory looked up at her shyly, "So then we're okay?"

She smiled gently, wrapping an arm around her daughter's shoulders, "We're okay."

**I hate the way you say my name **

**Like it's something secret **

**My pen is the barrel of the gun **

**Remind me which side you should be on **

**Oh, I want to hate you half as much as I hate myself **

**But you know that I could crush you with my voice **

**Stood on my roof and tried to see you **

**Forgetting about me **

**Hide the details **

**I don't want to know a thing **

**I wish that I was as invisible as you make me feel**

_A/N: Filler chapter. Yes, yes, I know: are they ever getting together? Well of course they are,  
do you guys know me and what a trory freak I am? But think about it, if you'd been hurt like that, would you just have jumped back into his arms within a week? Hopefully not. But don't worry, they'll get back together. I've known exactly what was going to happen in this story since before I started writing it like, three years ago. Never fear, it'll all work out in the end._


	32. The Tide

**A/N: I don't own _Gilmore Girls,_ Butch Walkeror _The Tide_ by The Spill Canvas**

**And he can't understand **

**How everyone goes on breathing **

**When true love ends. . . . . . . .**

**Heaven's not a place **

**Where you go when you die **

**It's that moment in life **

**When you actually feel alive**

-

**_FRIDAY_**

Rory stood outside of Tristan's house, staring up at it uncertainly as she hopped from foot to foot. Her group for the project had decided that they were going to have to meet this weekend and next weekend if they were going to finish it. This week they'd settled on Tristan's house. And so she found herself on the unwelcoming front step of their large home. She wrapped her arms around herself tightly. The wind was picking up and the storm clouds overhead were gathering with a vengeance. The door opened and Tristan stepped out of the way so she could come in as the rain started to fall.

She smiled, slipping off her coat, "Hey." Adam hadn't been at all thrilled that she was spending the evening at her ex-boyfriend's house.

He took it from her and hung it in the closet in the foyer, "Hey."

"Sorry I'm late. Traffic. Is everybody else here?"

He nodded, leading her into the livingroom. She took a seat next to Louise. The blonde looked up, "Oh, good." she shoved a pile of notes into the brunette's arms, "You're the amazing journalist. You've got the paper." Rory groaned and Louise kissed her on the cheek, "Thanks, babe. You know we love you." before going over to one of the boys and working on a posterboard for part of their presentation.

Four hours later they all six sat in the kitchen eating frozen pizzas and drinking Coke. The storm had really picked up and the television in the livingroom was turned to the news. Rory glanced out the window as thunder rumbled and shook the house. Two forks of lightning tore the sky and moments later an even louder clap of thunder sounded. She heard from the livingroom, _'Tornado watch for the greater Hartford area until two o'clock in the morning'_. She looked at the other members of the group and it was unanimously decided that no one was driving in this and they would all stay the night.

At 11:30 they all decided to turn in and sleeping arrangements were made. There were ten bedrooms in the house, so everyone could have their own. The way the house was set up, the bottom floor had the kitchen, livingroom, foyer, sitting room, dinning room, master bedroom, a guest bedroom and library. The basement had a home theater, game room, workout room, two bedrooms, and a kitchenette. The second floor had his father's study, his room, and five guest bedrooms.

And so at 1:00 Rory found herself laying an unfamiliar bed, listening to the rain and thunder. The bed was extremely comfortable. . . . . .the best money could buy. She curled into a ball and closed her eyes, breathing slowly. Why couldn't she sleep? This was one of the most comfortable beds she'd ever been in and she kept tossing and turning. She opened her eyes and saw the windows light up before a clap of thunder shook the house. She shot up, her heart beating faster. She was wearing a camisole she'd had on under her shirt and a pair of basketball shorts she'd borrowed from Tristan. Louise had borrowed a pair as well, but she thought the guys had just slept in their boxers.

She wiggled her shoulders, rolling her neck in a circle to relieve the tension as her heartbeat return to normal. And then another deafening explosion of thunder shook the house. She bolted out of bed and put a hand over her heart. She swallowed hard and looked at the door. She'd go to Louise's room. It would be easier to sleep if she was with her friend. Opening the door slowly, she slipped out and closed it silently. She crept down the hall and stopped two doors down at the blonde's room. Her hand was on the knob, but then she glanced down the hall at Tristan's closed door. She closed her eyes, grinding her teeth. She couldn't believe she was even arguing with herself about this. His room wasn't even an option. She looked down at her hand laying on Louise's door. No. Definitely a bad idea. She glanced back at Tristan's door and sighed. It took her a split second to decide against her better judgement and head for his room.

She reached it andreleased a long breath, closing her eyes. She couldn't believe she was doing this. Her knuckles rapped on the door three times gently before she took the knob in her hand and twisted it, pushing the door open. She blinked, swearing as she rubbed her eyes. His light was on and he was laying on his stomach on the bed and had a book in front of him. She closed the door and rubbed her eyes harder, shaking her head. She pulled her hands away and looked up to see that he was watching her, smirking. "Trouble sleeping?"

She rolled her eyes and walked over to the bed, sitting on the floor in front of it. "It's the stupid storm."

His eyebrow arched, "I thought you loved the rain."

"I do-" a clap of thunder interrupted her, "But not when I'm in the middle of death. And I definitely hate tornadoes."

"There isn't going to be a tornado."

She rolled her eyes, pulling her knees to her chest and causing the shorts to fall to the top of her thigh. "You don't know that. For all you know we could die tonight."

He shook his head, closing his book, "Well then maybe we should make it count." Rory just looked up at him for a moment before laughing. He smirked, tossing the novel onto the floor. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, sighing heavily as her laughter subsided and they fell into a comfortable silence. She chewed on her bottom lip, resting her chin on her knee. "Can I turn off the light? It's giving me a headache."

"Yeah, sure." he didn't make an innuendo or even raise an eyebrow. She stood and flicked it off before walking back over to her previous spot and sitting down in the same position. She rested her chin back on her knee and bit the insides of her cheeks, listening to his stereo. Butch Walker. She tightened her grip on her shins. And they just sat for a while, not looking at each other.

Not surprisingly, she couldn't get him off her mind. Once he'd come back it'd been like he'd never left. The girls still worshiped him, the guys still wanted to be him. Being gone for nearly a year hadn't made anyone forget who he was or the fact that he could do whatever he wanted to. She noticed that people she'd never seen him speak to still tried to talk to him. Girls still tried to get him to make out with them in the halls and tried to hook up with him at parties. But she did notice that he didn't talk to them as much. Before he'd talk back to them and laugh with them, but now he was more reserved. He didn't talk to people unless he really wanted to. At school he mostly hung out with Baker, Blake, Louise, Madeline, Paris, herself and Henry. He and Adam didn't really get along though.

She realized that he'd changed positions. The blue light from the stereo illuminated him and revealed that he was now sitting on the bed Indian-style, staring at the bright screen of his stereo, "Why did you come?" he asked quietly, not looking at her.

She glanced up, "What?"

He repeated his question, looking at her slowly, "Why did you come? Why are you in my room?"

She bit her lip, breathing slowly, "I couldn't sleep."

He shook his head, "If you just couldn't sleep then why didn't you go with Louise or Henry?"

Rory swallowed the lump in her throat, still refusing to look at him, "I. . . . . . ." she trailed off, running her teeth over the tip of her tongue, "We never talked."

He shook his head again, "What?"

She sighed, looking up at him, "We still haven't talked. We need to figure out what we're doing."

He looked away from her, obviously having an internal battle. "Rory, I've been willing to talk for two weeks. This is_ not_ the place to do this."

Her head cocked back, surprised, "What? Why not?"

He closed his eyes, not looking at her, "You can't be in my room in the middle of the night."

"Why not?"

He shook his head, he'd been watching her out of the corner of his eye. The way she chewed on her bottom lip and tucked her hair behind her ear. The way the shorts she was wearing. . . . . ._his shorts_. . . . . .the way they fell to the top of her thigh, exposing the skin that had healed from the bruises he'd left there months ago with his fingertips. It was driving him insane. Just being this close to her in his room. The things that had happened between them right on the spots they were sitting. . . . . . . "Because you have a boyfriend, and if you don't stop biting your lip like that your whole faithful, virginal thing is gonna be shot to hell."

Her eyes widened and her mouth opened slightly. Uh, wow. What the hell was she supposed to say to that? She hadn't even noticed she was biting her lip. They sat in silence for a moment until she said quietly, "What is this?"

He looked down at her, "I don't know." he said quietly, running a hand through his hair, "Rory, I can't be your friend."

Her eyes narrowed, "Why not?"

"Because, I just-" he shook his head, "I can't be around you all the time and not be with you. I can't be your friend."

She blinked slowly, shaking her head, "You mean you can't not be with the physically?"

"Rory-"

She cut him off, "Just like that? You can't be just friends with me. So you can't even stand to be around me if you're not fucking me?"

His eyes narrowed dangerously, "You know that's not what I meant. Don't even mess around with shit like that, Rory. You know how much you mean to me. It's not about the sex."

She rolled her eyes, fighting back emotions. _Why couldn't they just get along?_ "Then please explain."

He shook his head in disbelief, "What I mean, Rory is that I can't stand around and watch you with another guy. I hate seeing him touch you and kiss you when I know that you're not over me." she opened her mouth, but he didn't give her a chance to speak, "Don't even try to deny it, Rory. I know you're not. If you were then you wouldn't need closure." she closed her mouth looking away, "I hate that I'm jealous and I hate that I care, but honestly, it's impossible for me to just not care about you. I've tried, God knows I'd have done anything to forget about you, but I couldn't." he shook his head, "So when I say I can't be your friend,it's that I can't stand to see you with somebody else."

She swallowed hard, looking away as she shook her head, "If you want to be with me so much then why haven't you tried to be?"

He looked away from her, rubbing his chin slowly, "I can't."

She snorted, rolling her eyes, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Rory, I know you're fucking smart as hell. Use that pretty little head of yours. You know why I got shipped off."

She turned her head, locking eyes with him, "Yeah?"

"Yeah, so if I get involved with either of you again then I'm off to Georgia, not North Carolina,  
and I'm not coming back." Rory swallowed hard, looking away. She didn't know if she could go through losing him again. Tristan swore under his breath, running a hand through his hair. He'd risked it before and they both knew it. They sat in near silence for a while, the stereo the only noise apart from the rain that had started letting up. Finally he spoke quietly, "And trust me, Mary, I'd be more than willing to go through that again if I knew we would wind up together."

She rested her chin back on her knees, knowing that he was watching her. She looked down, closing her eyes. She could not go through losing him again. And so she wouldn't. "I can't." she said quietly, opening her eyes.

"What?"

"I can't be with you.".

He sighed, shaking his head._ They always got so close_, "And why not?"

She looked up at him, "Because I won't have you leave again."

"Rory-"

She shook her head, "Tristan, I had to deal with that once, and I don't think I could do it again."

"Ro-"

She stood cutting off his reply, "I'm going to bed."

"Damnit, Rory!" he yelled. She twirled around to face him and he stood up, walking over to her, "Do not do this." she shook her head, backing up, but he kept going, "There's something here, and you know it. No matter how much you try to deny it, you know it's never gonna go away."

"Tristan-"

He cut her off, "Tell me you feel it when he touches you."

"Feel what?"

He grabbed her wrists and they instantly burned as he repeated slowly, "_Tell me you feel it when he touches you_."

Her eyes were wide as he dropped her wrists. She watched him watching her. Why was he doing this? "Why does it matter?"

He shook his head, "Rory, do you know how many people actually have a physical reaction to each other's touch?"

She bit her lip, looking away from him as she shook her head, "It doesn't mean anything."

"It mean everything and you know it." he said quietly, watching her fighting an internal battle.

Rory swallowed hard. She couldn't lie to him, so she didn't. "I'll see you in the morning Tristan." she turned and put her hand on the knob, but his voice cut her off.

"Why are you so scared?"

She squeezed her eyes closed before turning around to her defeated ex-boyfriend, "I'm not."

"Don't fucking lie to me, Rory."

She bit her lip, looking away from him, "I'm going to bed." she pushed open the door and walked out, closing it softly. Tristan's jaw clenched as the door shut and he swore loudly, throwing his pillow against the wall. She heard his muffled curse and closed her eyes. Well that had definitely been a bad idea.

-

00000000000000000000000000000000

-

Rory smiled at Adam as they sat in fourth period on Monday. She grinned at him and he gave her a suspicious look. "Tomorrow's Halloween."

He nodded, "It is."

She grinned, biting her lip, "Are you going trick-or-treating with me?"

He laughed lightly, "What?"

"Trick-or-treating."

"Rory, you're sixteen."

"Yes, and you're seventeen. I'm glad we got that cleared up." she leaned back in her seat, "Are you going with me?"

"What about Keaton Reener's party?"

She shrugged, "We'll go after."

He groaned, "Rory. . . . . .come on."

"Are you seriously not going with me?"

He sighed, "I really don't want to."

Her shoulders fell and she crossed her arms, facing forward in her seat, "Whatever."

He rolled his eyes, "Baby, come on-"

She cut him off, "Whatever. It's fine. I'll get somebody else to go with me."

"You're not coming to the party?"

"I'll come when I'm done."

"Rory. . . . ."

She rolled her eyes, "It's fine, Adam." He opened his mouth to reply, but the teacher walked in, cutting him off.

-

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

-

"Oh Paris. . . . . . . ." Tristan called in a singsong voice in their own fourth period.

"What do you want?" she asked, not looking up from her work.

He grinned. He loved it when she was pissed, "Tomorrow's Halloween."

"No?" she said sarcastically.

He rolled his eyes, sitting on top of her desk. Her jaw clenched and she glared up at him. He just smiled back, "Are you going trick-or-treating with me?"

"What?"

"Trick-or-treating. We go together all the time."

"Not since we were twelve." she pushed him off her desk and resumed her work on the crumpled papers.

He groaned, "Paris, come on. It'll be fun."

"No. I'm going to Keaton's party, anyway."

"Well yeah, I am too when I'm done trick-or-treating."

"No."

"Oh come on, Paris, what happened to best friends?" he asked, kneeling next to her desk. She glanced over to see his bottom lip poking out, "Please?"

She shook her head, "No. I hate trick-or-treating. Half the candy sucks and the other half is poisoned. I'll get blisters and I hate exercising. Walking for two hours sucks and it's not worth breaking out for a month because of all the sugar."

He sighed, rolling his eyes, "Fine. I'll find someone else to go with."

"Mmm." she didn't look up from her paper and he gave up, sitting back down on his seat.

-

_**NEXT NIGHT**_

Rory sat in Louise's bedroom. Her arms crossed over her chest as she silently pouted. The other four girls in the room were talking about the new girl, Marissa, and debating whether she liked Tristan or not. She crossed her mile long legs under her mid-thigh fire engine red dress. Her feet were clad in three and a half inch shiny red stilettos. She had a headband with devil horns on it and the polish on her nails had been titled _'Red Hot'_. Of course, she'd forgone the pitchfork, not wanting to overdo it, or carry something around all night. "I still don't understand why no one wants to go trick-or-treating."

Louise laughed, straightening out her dress. It was the same as Rory's, but jet black. And she had cat ears instead of devil horns, "Because the rest of us kept aging after we turned ten." Rory stuck her tongue out at her and she laughed, "Exactly."

Rory rolled her eyes, looking over at Lane as she swept a thick line of liquid eyeliner over her top lid, working on the makeup for her revealing Cleopatra costume. "Lane, why won't you go with me?"

"Because I hate the outdoors."

She sighed, falling back on the bed dramatically. "You know, I think Tristan wanted to go trick-or-treating." Madeline said, fastening the last bobby pin in her hair and turning in front of the mirror to look at her french maid costume from all angles.

"Yeah, he did. You guys should go together and just meet us at the party." Paris said, brushing silver eyeshadow on as she finished her makeup. She was going as a fairy.

"Oh yeah, that would go over real well." she said sarcastically from her place on her back. Paris rolled her eyes and turned to make a comeback, but was cut off when the doorbell rang.

Louise turned, "They're here." She and Paris left the room to go let the guys in. She was still laying on the bed trying to convince one of the two girls left in the room to go with her when the blondes returned with all six boys in tow. Each of them had on jeans, a white shirt, and a leather jacket. _The T-Birds_. She was so glad that she and Paris had been able to talk the other three girls out of going as the Pink Ladies. It was cute that the guys were all the same, but it's would've been so cliche and boring for all of them to dress from Grease. And not nearly as sexy. She was pulled form her thoughts when her body was projected six inches into the air as Adam jumped onto the bed next to her.

She turned to look at him, "So you're still not going trick-or-treating with me?" she asked sadly. She really wanted to go, but not by herself.

"I really don't want to."

She sighed heavily and Paris interrupted, "Why don't you and Tristan just go together?"

Rory sat up and Tristan looked up from his conversation with Blake and Louise, having heard his name, "Huh?"

Paris looked over at him, "Didn't you want to go trick-or-treating?"

He smirked, shoving his hands into his pockets as he leaned against the wall, "Yeah."

"Okay, so you want to go trick-or-treating and so does Rory, but nobody else will go with you. Why don't you two just go and then meet up with us at the party in an hour?"

The two looked at each other and shrugged. "Do you have any grocery bags?" Rory asked, looking up at Louise.

-

000000000000000000000000

-

They pulled into the driveway of the party house and jumped out of the cars. Everyone started to make their way in, but Rory, Adam, and Tristan held back. Rory wrapped her arms around Adam's neck and kissed him slowly, "I'll see you in an hour."

He kissed her gently, "Bye." he looked over her shoulder at Tristan, who stood against one of the cars, hands shoved into his pockets as he watched them, smirking. He shot him a warning glance and Tristan just smirked back.

Rory turned and Tristan looked from her boyfriend to her, "Ready?" she nodded, releasing Adam's hand as she walked over to Tristan, leaving the first boy to storm into the house. "He's not in a good mood." he started walking down the driveway towards the street.

She rolled her eyes, walking after him, "I'm sure he's jealous."

Tristan looked down at her, "Of what?"

She shrugged, "The fact that there's a lot about us that he doesn't know."

He nodded, looking forward as they walked, "You never told him much about us?"

"He never asked."

Tristan nodded thoughtfully, turning onto the sidewalk, "You're going to freeze to death in that dress."

"I am not."

His eyebrow arched, "No sleeves. Mid-thigh. I'm sure it's thin." he looked her up and down slowly and she hit him in the arm. He covered it with his hand, "_Ow_."

She shook her head, laughing, "Don't look me up and down like that."

He laughed, wrapping his arm around her shoulder, "I can't help it."

-

Half an hour later they'd made it down a large stretch of houses, but Rory was lagging. "Come on, Mary." he called from ten feet in front of her, "If you don't hurry up the ten year olds will take all the candy." he turned and walked backwards.

"Tristan. . . . . . . ." she groaned, dragging her feet until she caught up with him.

He stopped walking, "Hmm?" She pointed down. He glanced at the pavement, having no idea what she was complaining about. "The ground? No, I don't like it, either."

She shook her head, "No, not the ground. My feet are falling off."

"Well maybe you shouldn't have worn four inch heels."

"Three and a half." she corrected, crossing her arms over her chest.

He laughed, "Excuse me. Three and a half. Why don't you just take them off?"

Her jaw dropped, eyes widening, "And have my feet get disgusting?"

"Better than losing them." She sighed, her chest heaving under his black leather jacket. Twenty minutes ago she'd gotten cold and had taken it from him. They stood in silence and she sighed again before looking up at him and grinning. He smirked, "What?"

She bit her lip, "_Tristan. . . . . _."

"_Rory. . . . . . ._" he mocked and she kept grinning. He looked at her for a moment before shaking his head"No."

Her shoulders fell and she groaned, "Why not?"

"Because. It's your own fault you wore those. No."

"But Tristan, you don't want me to lose my feet!" her eyes widened and she bit her bottom lip, "Please?"

He rolled his eyes, shaking his head, "I can't believe I'm doing this." he muttered, handing her his bag of candy. She squealed, clapping as she took the bag in her free hand. Tristan turned so that his back was to her and bent his knees. She wrapped her arms around his neck and jumped up, locking her knees against his waist. He straightened as if she weighed nothing and locked his elbows under her knees, hitching her up.

She smiled, kissing his cheek, "Thank you Tristan."

"Yeah, yeah." he grumbled, trying to ignore the fact that the side of his face was now on fire. But as he walked further down the street it became impossible. He could feel her breath on his neck, her chest pressed against his back. His arms were becoming stuck to the underside of her knees and he could swear that the insides of her thighs were burning through his shirt and scorching his back. Once she laid her forehead on his shoulder and when she picked her head up, her lips brushed against his neck unintentionally. It was a while to the next house and she never got any heavier.

She rested her chin on his shoulder and said quietly into his ear, "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Coming with me. Letting me wear your jacket." she felt his body shake with laughter, and she tightened her legs against his body before going on, "And for giving me a piggy-back ride. I like my feet and I was quite distressed when I thought I was going to lose them."

"Well-" he rubbed the insides of her legs lightly with his fingertips, "-anything to save your feet."

She smiled, tightening her arms around his neck, "I'm glad you're concerned." They came to the next house and he set her down gently. She cringed as weight was distributed onto her sore feet, but stood up straight.

"You okay?" he asked, obviously concerned as he turned towards her and took a step closer.

She nodded, "Wearing heels sucks. And then when your feet get sore and you take the pressure off of them and then put it back on it just hurts."

He nodded slowly, trying to push back his grin. It wasn't funny, really. "Your feet and legs hurt?" she nodded and he crossed his arms over his chest. God, she was gorgeous. He couldn't believe she put up with the way Adam treated her. He was such a dick, but in the back of his mind he knew that his own arrival had something to do with the way Rory's boyfriend was acting, "Why do girls wear heels if they hurt so much?"

She looked at him as if it was obvious, "They make anybody look hot."

His eyebrow arched and he nodded slowly, "Yeah, it's real hot to look so pained."

She laughed and hit him lightly. Without thinking he grabbed her hand before she could take it back. Her laugh instantly died and she swallowed hard. He pulled her closer to him, and her feet didn't hurt as they inched towards him. He touched her face without thinking, running his thumb over her jaw, "What part of your legs hurt?" She opened her mouth to reply, but nothing came out. He leaned closer to her, his fingertips brushing her inner-thigh lightly, "Do you need to go back?" he asked. She looked between his eyes and lips slowly as he leaned closer, if it was at all possible, his fingers tracing shapes into the top of her inner-thigh. Her eyes began to close of their own free will, but then the door opened andthey flew apart like shrapnel. A very embarrassed girl stood in the doorway, looking between them with wide eyes. Rory recognized her as a Sophomore from school. It must have been pretty embarrassing to open the door and see the most popular guy in school and his ex- girlfriend nearly making out on your doorstep. Especially when everyone knew that they weren't over each other and said ex-girlfriend had a boyfriend.

The girl swallowed and Rory realized that she was holding a large bowl, "Did you guys want some candy?"

"Yeah. Thanks." They held out their bags and she dropped a handful into each.

"Happy Halloween." she said awkwardly.

"Happy Halloween." Tristan croaked, his voice breaking. She smiled nervously and told them that she'd see them at school in the morning before closing the door. Rory shut her eyes, folding her arms and they stood in silence for a moment, both staring at the door. "So how about that piggy-back ride?" Tristan asked quietly.

She bit her lip, nodding slowly as she took his candy bag, "Thanks."

She climbed into his back and he hoisted her up, "Do you want to go back now?" he asked.

She tightened her arms around his neck, "Not yet."

-

**Heaven's not a place **

**Where you go when you die **

**It's that moment in life **

**When you touch her **

**And you feel alive **

**So live for the moment **

**And take this advice **

**Live by every word **

**Love's completely real **

**So forget anything that you've heard **

**And live for the moment now**


	33. Don't Move

_A/N: I don't own Gilmore Girls or_ Don't Move_ by Butch Walker._

**So many blacks and whites **

**Are made to be so blue **

**We've all got our wars to fight **

**But I won't fight with you **

**If I could just get your attention **

**I'd never let it go **

**Until you've felt what I am gonna say. . . .**

**-**

**000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000**

**-**

Rory sat in third period the next day, running her fingers through her hair in frustration as she stared down at her worksheet. She didn't get it. They'd been seconds and centimeters from kissing, and it wasn't even weird. They weren't uncomfortable or awkward around each other. She sighed and rested her forehead in her hand. If only she could concentrate. He was right behind her and she could hear his pen scratching on the paper. He could focus. Why couldn't she? Her bottom lip slid between her teeth and she closed her eyes tightly before opening them again. She could hear his shoe tapping the carpeted floor gently; his knuckles crack lightly as he flexed his cramped hand. She couldn't believe that she'd almost kissed him. . . . .or that she'd wanted him to kiss her. She had Adam. Wonderful, sweet, patient Adam. That was turning into someone completely different than who she wanted to be with.

She heard whispering behind her and strained her ears to make out the voices. It was the new girl, Marissa, and Tristan. She heard him laugh quietly and her stomach knotted. Why was he talking to her? She mentally berated herself. She couldn't get jealous when Tristan flirted with other girls. She had a freaking boyfriend.

She was still scolding herself ten minutes later when the bell rang. She stood quickly and shoved her books into her bag, getting ready to make a break for it when she felt his hand grip her elbow. Rory almost swore in frustration as a dull heat throbbed up her arm when she turned to look at him, "Yeah?"

"Do you want to meet after school in the library?"

Her eyes widened, "What?"

Tristan tilted his head, momentarily confused by her reaction before he laughed lightly, "To study. We only need to meet once or twice more until I'm completely caught up."

"Oh." she blushed as embarrassment flooded her body, "Yeah. That's fine."

He grinned slowly and touched her burning cheek, "Definitely something I miss."

She didn't say anything, just smiled gently and ducked from his hand before leaving the classroom. Tristan watched her go and swore under his breath. He was going to make a mistake today, he could already tell.

-

**_AFTER SCHOOL_**

Rory sat across from Tristan at one of the back tables in the library, tapping her pen on the open text book absent mindedly. It'd only taken him two weeks to catch up in everything. They'd covered all of physics in the first three days and then he'd asked her to help him catch up in all their other subjects. She wasn't surprised that this was the last study session they'd need. He was one of the smartest people she knew.

Rory looked up to see Tristan roll his neck in a circle to relieve the tension. "So then that's everything?" he asked, eyes closed as his head had fallen back.

She glanced over her notes before exhaling deeply, "That's it."

He nodded and stood, gathering his things. Being with her for the past hour and a half had sent his increasingly acute senses haywire. He could smell her light perfume mixing tantalizingly with her shampoo. Her nails were painted a deep red and she had been constantly playing with her hair, running her fingers through it and twisting it around them. Her breathing had been slow and constant throughout the entire session and she occasionally pulled her bottom lip between her teeth or chewed on the insides of her cheeks when she was thinking. Once she'd rolled her head in a slow circle to relieve the tension and it'd taken all his willpower to refrain from pulling her out of her chair and dragging her between the bookcases to convince her she wanted to be with him again.

But somehow he'd refrained and now realized that he had to get away from her. . . . . .and dear lord she was stretching. Her fingers were locked behind her back and her arms were extended straight back as her spine went as far back as it could. Her eyes were closed and she made a small noise of pleasure as her back popped. She didn't even know he was paying attention to her. She thought he'd walked towards the library's exit for his locker. He felt his pants tighten and swore under his breath. This wasn't good.

Rory rubbed a hand over her face and inhaled deeply before looking up to see the library door closing. Tristan must have left for his locker. She started gathering her things and shoving them into her bag. She made her way to her locker and spun the combination, pulling it open as the blonde appeared beside her. She looked up, preparing to say something, but the comment died in her throat. The way he was looking at her made her face burn and her stomach knot. She opened her mouth slowly, trying to think of something to say. "Hey." was all she could manage to whisper as the strap of her bookbag slid form her grasp and it clattered to the floor. He didn't say anything, just took her hand in his, not breaking eye contact as he grinned lightly and brought the back of her fingers to his lips to kiss them gently. Her mouth opened slightly as she glanced down at their hands. He laced his fingers through hers and pushed the back of her hand against the lockers, slowly shifting his body until he bad her pinned against the cold metal, both of her hands down at her sides.

Tristan could feel her stomach and chest rising as she took deep, heated breaths. He had to check the urge to swear when he felt her hips pushing against his unconsciously. He leaned down slowly, looking from her eyes to her lips, and he could've sworn time stopped as their faces inched closer together.

Rory could feel his hot breath on her lips as he came closer, and her eyes started to close. Her mouth opened slightly, but then she remembered where they were and she turned her head. Tristan stopped and he looked down at her, his face not changing. "Tristan, we can't."

Usually he would've sworn, punched the lockers, and walked away. But today he wasn't in the mood to be turned down. After a moment he grinned and took advantage of her position. He released her hands and his fingers gripped her hips, pulling her flush against him as his face trailed down her neck. Over the course of their study session, her blazer and tie had been shed and the top button of her shirt hand come undone. When she'd turned away from him, the second button had been strained and had pulled from it's hole, revealing a very low cut white camisole with lace trimming the top. He smirked to himself and trailed his face over her chest, his lips never touching her. His breath was hot against her, though, and his fingers were rubbing small circles into her hips.

She closed her eyes, swallowing hard as her determination began to waver, "Tristan, I have a boyfriend."

She knew he was smirking as one of his hands trailed up her side, taking her shirt with it. He raised the clothing several inches before sliding his hand back down and allowing the cloth to come with it. His lips were touching her neck now, but he wasn't kissing her. He was still allowing his breath to dance across her skin tantalizingly as his hand slid back up her side, this time on the outside of her shirt and it rested on her natural waist, curling around the natural curve and pulling her closer to him if it were possible.

His nose trailed up her neck gently and she bit her lip, "I'm with Adam."

He came to her earlobe and pulled it gently between her teeth, making her shudder as he whispered into her ear, "It doesn't matter." he kissed below her ear gently before moving his lips to the hollow of her cheek and placing a butterfly kiss on it. He moved a centimeter closer to her mouth and his lips brushed her cheek again before touching the corner of her mouth. He looked into her eyes to see that they were clear and brimming with anticipation, watching him as his lips finally connected to hers. After a split second her eyelids fluttered and then closed as he pulled her bottom lip between his.

And her world shattered beneath her. All the lies she'd been telling herself. Everything she'd said to hurt him. Each kiss she'd given Adam to try and prove to him that she was faithful in her heart. It was all falling apart. The web of lies and fake emotion she'd built for herself in the past weeks was being expertly unwoven by Tristan's lips as she felt the world stop, swell, and shatter in her chest.

One of Rory's hands raised to his chest to clench the loose material, while the other curled around the side of his neck, bringing him closer. Heat curled in the bottom of her stomach and she inhaled deeply, tilting her head to the side so that their lips fused at a more natural angle. She couldn't believe this was happening. More than that she couldn't believe she was kissing him back.

Tristan had to check the urge to ask if this was real. He couldn't believe she was responding like this. Tilting her head and touching him like she used to. He deepened the kiss and she opened her mouth willingly, her fingertips tracing random patterns onto his neck. He felt her shift slightly down and could've sworn that her knees gave out, but you wouldn't know it with the pressure of her lips against his. He lifted her slightly and pushed her harder to the lockers, using the metal doors to keep her upright.

His hands slid slowly down to the back of her thighs. His grip tightened and she responded, her hands tightening on his shirt and neck as he lifted her up, locking her legs around his hips and pushing her back against the lockers again. Her hand trailed up from his chest until it became tangled in his hair, pulling him closer violently.

Tristan's right hand tightened on Rory's hip, but his left hand swiftly made it's way up her body to clench in her hair and pull her head back, giving them a better angle. He could feel the fire licking her skin that he'd become so accustomed to the previous year. Her body was heating up uncontrollably and he ground his hips against hers. A small whimper rose form her throat as her grip on his hair tightened.

He felt her pulling away slowly and he deepened the kiss again, pulling her closer. This time when she began to pull away it was quicker and her hands slid from his neck and hair to rest squarely on his chest. She pushed his body away and let her legs drop gently. Tristan emitted a low growl and he felt Rory grin against his lips as she broke contact.

He opened his eyes to see that her lips were swollen and red, a faint split on her bottom lip made him lick his own and lean down to capture her in a gentle, loving lip lock. He pulled away after only a moment and took in her flushed face and messy hair. It only brought back memories that he'd been dying to relive for months but couldn't do anything about in the hall.

She looked up at him, her chest rising and falling heavily, and he saw something flash across her face that he couldn't place. "Don't run." he said quietly, shaking his head.

Rory pressed her lips together and smiled lightly, "I wasn't going to."

Tristan exhaled, chewing on the insides of his cheeks as he took her face in his hands and rested his forehead against hers, "Good."

She smiled lightly, curling her index fingers into two of his belt loops and pulling his body closer to hers without breaking their foreheads apart, "Tristan, I-"

He shook his head silently, cutting her off. "Don't. Not right now." he whispered, knowing that she was about to start in on the fact that she was still with Adam and that they couldn't be together. But at the moment he didn't want to think about it. Right now all he wanted to focus on was that he finally had her back.

**-**

**0000000000000000000000000000000000**

**-**

**I can move you like an earthquake **

**Listen to me as my hands shake **

**Cause I want you **

**I need you **

**I can't live without you, baby **

**So baby don't move at all **

**Cause you're about to break my fall **

**Stay where you are **

**Staring at the stars **

**Don't ever move at all**


	34. Far Away

_A/N: Yeah, I know. 5000 years to update. So here's a new one. Yay, Merry Christmas. It's all trory-ness, of course, the best._

_I don't own Gilmore Girls or Far Away by Nickelback._

**-**

**_You know, you know _**

**_I love you _**

**_I have loved you all along _**

**_And I miss you _**

**_Been far away for far too long _**

**_I keep dreaming you'll be with me _**

**_And you'll never go _**

**_Stop breathing _**

**_If I don't see you anymore_**

-

Rory shifted her hips and shoulders, trying to shift the weight above her. She was laying under Tristan, her eyes closed and her lips fused to his as they laid on his bed. Upon feeling her move, he pushed down on the arm that was resting next to her on the mattress, elevating himself to relieve the pressure on her. But a smile tweaked the corner of his mouth as she wrapped a leg around his hips, pulling him back to her. She shifted after a moment, breaking away, but he immediately kissed her again.

"Tristan." she whispered, breaking away, "I have to breathe."

His lips found her neck and he began trailing hot, open mouthed kisses down the length of it, "You've been breathing since January. However, I haven't kissed you in ten months. Therefore this takes precedent over breathing."

She rolled her eyes, resting her hands on his chest and pushing him away lightly, "Tristan-" but she was cut off as his lips once more found hers, his tongue probing deep into her mouth, pulling her back out into him. Rory broke away after a moment, knowing that if they got caught up they would never work anything out, "-we have to talk about what we're going to do."

He'd been leaning down to kiss her again, but stopped and raised his head slightly, smirking, "Well gee Mary, if a year ago I'd known you wanted me to talk dirty to you. . . . ."

She laughed, shaking her head and sitting up, "I bet you're real proud of that one."

He grinned, "It was rather witty, wasn't it?"

Rory bit her lip, glancing around his room, "Are you sure your parents won't be home any time soon?"

Tristan nodded, "Yeah. My dad doesn't get off until seven and my mom is visiting her sister."

"Are you sure he won't get off early?"

"I'm sure."

"But what if-"

He cut her off, taking her hands in his, "Mary."

"But he might-"

"Mary." he kissed her gently.

She sighed, hating that she had to be so paranoid, "You're sure?"

"Positive."

Rory nodded slowly, biting her lip, "Fine. So what are we going to do?"

He shrugged, standing from the bed and walking over to the window, "Be together?"

"You mean, like, openly?"

He looked over at her, his eyes locking with hers, "Yes, I mean like openly. As in you break up with Adam and get back with me. And we walk around school together and I introduce you as 'Hey, this is Mary, my girlfriend'."

She looked up at him in disbelief, shaking her head minutely, "We can't."

"Why?" he asked as if it were the most sane thing in the world.

"How long do you think it will take for that to get back to your parents?"

His eyes darkened and his chin lowered a fraction of an inch, "So?"

She stood, "So, you'll have to leave again."

"And we'll be together. Why is that so bad?"

"Because you'd be half way down the east coast. We wouldn't see each other for a year and a half."

He chewed on the insides of his cheeks, looking around the room, "Well then what do you propose? Hide it? Because face it, neither of us can handle not being together."

She crossed her arms, looking down slowly, "I know."

"So then what do you want to do?"

Rory looked out of a window on the same wall Tristan was standing against and walked over to it slowly, never looking at him. She chewed on her bottom lip and he took a step towards her slowly, but then stopped. "Hide it." she said quietly.

He shook his head slowly, "Rory-"

"We have to."

"No we don't."

"Yes, we do."

He took a step closer, "Rory, you hide something when you're ashamed of it-"

She cut him off, turning to face him, "Look Tristan, I love that you're being so sweet and so considerate and that you're willing to jump into this thing head first and get shipped off again, but I can't handle that. I had to deal with it last time and honestly, I don't think I could again."

He shook his head, "So then what? You break up with Adam and neither of us so much as look at somebody else? Because you know, I'm a good actor, but I'm not that good. These people have been around me since I hit puberty and honestly, they won't believe for a second that I don't have a girl or I'm not hooking up with anybody at parties. Plus that fact that you and Adam will be broken up and you won't be doing anything or dating anybody." He shook his head, having moved right up next to her, "You and me are the topic of conversation of the entire student body. Everybody's wondering when we'll get back together and what's going on with us. There's no way nobody will suspect anything."

She shrugged, "Then I won't break up with Adam."

Tristan completely stilled, his chin lowering a fraction of an inch, "What?"

She glanced over at him before sighing and looking back out the window, "You said it yourself: no one would believe us. So we'll make it believable. I'll stay with Adam."

His nose wrinkled in disgust, "No."

"Tristan-"

He took a step closer, "No. God, it kills me enough to see you with him now, but after we're back together? To still have to watch him touch you and carry your stuff and put his arm around you? No."

"It's the only way."

He shook his head slowly, moving closer to her as his voice dropped, "Rory, this isn't you." she looked down and he held her upper arms, leaning his face closer to hers, "You don't cheat on people. You're not like that."

She sighed, speaking quietly, "I know."

"So then why are you suggesting this?"

Her face rose slowly and he could see the beginning of tears pooling in her eyes as she shrugged minutely, her eyes focused on her right, refusing to meet his gaze, "I don't know." His right hand slid from her arm up to cup her cheek and his left hand raised to the bottom of her chin, gently moving her eyes to his. She swallowed as their gazed locked and blinked, the unshed tears clouding her sight, "I just. . .can't not be with you." she whispered, pressing her lips together as her gaze slid from him.

He looked over every inch of her face, uncertain of what to say. Her gaze slowly came back to him and he shook his head lightly, leaning down to capture her in a deep, searing kiss. He felt her shake gently, and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. Rory's hands slid up his chest before clenching the material of his shirt between her fingers and increasing the pressure of her lips against his.

They jumped as a shrill ring echoed throughout the room. Rory moved to break away, but the pressure of Tristan's hands on her hips kept her in place. She gradually broke away and moved to grab her phone right before her machine picked up, "Hello?" She was silent for a moment, "Hey Adam." Upon hearing the name, Tristan wrapped his arms around her from behind and pulled her back flush against his chest, his lips finding her neck. Her jaw dropped, inhaling silently as he scraped his teeth along the junction of her shoulder and neck, his hand sliding up under her skirt. "Mmhmm." She closed her eyes, her head falling back onto his shoulder Tristan smirked against her skin, a small chuckle escaping his throat. "Yeah, I'm still helping Tristan catch up." He laughed, sucking on her shoulder blade gently as his hand moved further up her thigh Rory slapped his arm lightly and took a step away. "No that was a grunt. He fell off his chair." She shot him a withering glare and his lip quirked, a charming grin overcoming his face as he leaned against the wall, his eyes not leaving her.

She rolled her eyes, turning her back on him, "Yeah Adam, I know. But I have to go-" she fell silent as he cut her off, "-yeah, we're studying. I'll call you when we're done. Okay? Bye." She hung up and twirled around to face him, her eyes narrowed. He smirked and pushed himself off the wall, walking towards her, "You are the most uncooperative, incorrigible, hormone-" she was cut off halfway through her rant as he wrapped his arms around her and swung her closer to him, crushing his lips against hers. She planted her palms firmly on his chest and pushed him away, "- And don't think that just because you kiss me-" once again she fell silent as his mouth covered hers. She broke away stubbornly, "Tristan-"

"Rory." he mimicked, kissing her again.

She didn't kiss him back, "You can't do that."

"Do what?" he trailed kisses down her neck, pushing her against the wall.

"Kiss me while I'm talking to Adam."

He smirked, pulling away, "Because you can't control yourself when I kiss you?"

She pushed him back, her eyes rolling once more, "Because I get distracted easily. Besides, he's suspicious enough without you making this harder."

Tristan chewed on the insides of his cheeks, watching her fight to hold back a grin, "Mary, about this whole situation?"

"Hmm?"

"Well since you're not going to break up with Adam, technically you can't get mad about what I'm about to tell you."

Her head cocked back, eyes widening slightly, "What?"

He pushed on the wall next to her, moving himself away from her as he scratched the back of his head, "Well my parents are kind of. . . . ." he trailed off, looking around the room uncertainly.

"Are kind of. . . . .?" she supplied, taking a step closer to him.

"Kind of setting me up with Marissa Jenkins." he said quickly, looking away from her.

She stiffened, her jaw dropping slightly. So she hadn't been imagining the new girl flirting with him, "What?"

He sighed, looking around his room, "They just-I don't know. They've known her family for forever and they've all decided that we should be together." he shook his head, "I mean, I don't like her like that, but it's actually good that she's the one they want me to date."

He looked back over to see that she was obviously confused, "Why is that good?"

Tristan shrugged, "She's a prude-" Rory's eyes widened and Tristan saw that she'd taken his comment the wrong way. He stepped closer to her, shaking his head, "-what I mean is that she won't want to do anything. She went here up until half way through ninth grade and looking at her now, she hasn't changed that much. She won't try to throw herself at me or try to get me to do anything with her." he stopped speaking and Rory chewed on her bottom lip, glancing away from him as she crossed her arms over her chest. He moved right in front of her, wrapping his hands around the back of her elbows and pulling her an inch closer to him. "I won't have to do anything with her and it won't look weird."

"Tristan," she looked up at him and inhaled deeply, "I'm only saying this because it's what happened to me." his eyes narrowed slightly and she continued, "You go for the innocent girls, but they change. We were only together for three months before we slept together. You make me want to do things. I wanted to be with you completely, in every way. I didn't want to be innocent like before. You made me want to be bad. I wanted to know what it was that made every girl around me want you. Tristan-" she shook her head, so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't see his eyes darkening. "-when you touch me, it's like nothing I've ever felt before. I mean just when you look at me. . ." she bit her lip absentmindedly and his grip on her arms tightened, "I wanted to learn how to make you happy in bed and I wanted know what it was like, but most of all I just wanted you." she looked up at him to see his eyes nearly black.

Rory chewed the insides of her cheeks, thinking of a different approach. "I wanted you to teach me everything." she whispered, leaning up to speak into his ear, "I wanted you to touch me." her arms uncrossed and she clenched his shirt in her hands, bringing his body flush against hers as her hot breath danced over his ear, "I wanted you sneak through my window in the middle of the night and tell me how back you wanted to fuck me." she grinned, licking the shell of his ear lightly as she pushed her hips to his gently. "I wanted you to slam me against a wall and-" she gasped quietly as he grabbed her hips forcefully and ground them against his, silencing her momentarily. She kissed his ear gently, wrapping one arm around his neck while the other slid down to curl around one of his belt loops, "-yeah." she breathed, kissing his neck slowly as she pulled away until she could clearly see his face. He stared down at her, his breathing heavier. She bit her lip, back to her normal self, and nodded slowly, "And I used to think I wanted to wait until I was married."

He shook his head, his eyes dark, "So what, you think as soon as we start dating she'll want to jump me?"

Rory shrugged, moving to pull away but his hands on her hips kept her in place, nestled comfortable against him, "I'm just saying. . . . . ."

"Mmmm," he shook his head, leaning closer, "see, that's the thing, Mary. With you, I did it on purpose. That's the difference between you and Marissa. I didn't want to do ungodly things to her body the first time I saw her." Rory smirked, biting her lip as he spoke into her ear, "You on the other hand. . . . . ." he once more dragged her hips against his, "It was all I could think about at first."

She just rolled her eyes, moving to push him away, "I have to get home."

Tristan sighed, "Rory."

She ignored him, picking up her jacket, "I really do. My parents will start to wonder-"

He cut her off, "Oh come on, you aren't seriously mad about this, are you? I'm not even really going to be with her. You, on the other hand, liked Adam. . . . ." he trail off slowly.

Rory turned to face him surprised by the break, "What?"

He was silent, looking her up and down slowly, "You don't still like him, do you?"

She froze, her mouth suddenly dry, "What?"

Tristan's face visibly hardened as he watched her, "You never clarified about liking him or not."

Her mouth opened silently and they just stared at each other for a moment, "No." she said finally, her voice small.

Tristan just looked away, his face unreadable, "Yeah, you should get home."

Rory closed her eyes swearing quietly, "Tristan."

"You should get home, Rory."

She sighed, "Would you just listen to me?"

"Rory, seriously, you should go. I don't think you want to be around me right now."

"Tristan, come on, I've been with him for months. He's been a really good friend. I can't just start hating him-"

"Rory." the way he said her name silenced her more effectively than anything he'd ever done. It was a warning, the underlying message of not to talk to him about it right now came out loud and clear as he walked towards his closet.

"Tristan, he's a friend. That's all it is for me." he shot her another glare, but she continued, "I don't want to be with him. If I wanted him then I wouldn't be here." she shook her head, "Tristan, you don't need to feel threatened by him." He didn't say anything, just disappeared into the large side room. She shook her head, "Why are you being like this?"

"Like what?" he asked, looking through his clothes and refusing to look at her.

"Like you seriously think I like him when you know I don't." she followed him into the closet and stood in the doorway. He didn't answer, just pulled a sweatshirt off it's hanger. "Oh my gosh Tristan, you did the same thing with Dean, will you just give it a rest?" the muscles in his jaw clenched and she knew that she was pissing him off. Mentioning Dean was always crossing a line. Her arms crossed over her chest of their own free will, "Tristan, stop."

He still didn't spare her a glance as he grabbed a pair of tennis shoes and sat down to pull them on, "Rory, for real, you should get home. I'm sure Adam is worried about you. You might want to call him back."

She licked her lips in frustration, shaking her head as her eyes rolled, "Fuck it. We haven't even gotten back together yet and we're already fighting. This isn't going to work. Whatever." she turned to leave, expecting him to stop her. Her anger spiked when he didn't and she spun around, working to keep her voice from a scream, "What the hell is your problem, Tristan? You're back for two months and the whole time you're acting like you only want to be with me and it's supposedly driving you crazy to see me with him." she shook her head, swallowing hard, "Well I'm here, Tristan. I'm with you. I don't want him, okay? My God, how many ways do I have to show you before you'll believe me?"

He didn't answer, just stood and walked towards the door, silently thanking whatever higher power actually existed that she hadn't walked out, "You might want to go. I'm about to get piss drunk and I don't think you want to see me in that state."

"Tristan-"

He cut her off without looking at her, "In fact, can you hold on a second? I'm about to call Baker and ask him to come over and get drunk with me, cause God knows it's no fun by yourself." he pulled out his phone, but before he could finish dialing the number she'd snatched it from his hands, forcing him to look at her.

"What do you want me to say? I'm here. I don't want him. What the hell do you want from me?" He didn't say anything, just stared at her, his gaze unwavering. "Tristan!"

"Why won't you break up with him?" he asked quietly, staring her right in the eye.

She blinked slowly, not having expected him to speak, "I told you, it would look weird."

He shook his head minutely, "Not weird enough for them to send me off again and you know it."

Rory didn't say anything, just pressed her lips together and looked away from him, staring out the window for a moment before speaking. "I don't want to be with him."

Tristan chewed on the insides of his cheeks, "I can't watch you with him Rory, okay? I can't."

She looked up at him, her head tilted, "We don't have a choice." He pursed his lips, turning away from her, but she was instantly against him, forcing him to look at her, "Tristan." she whispered, leaning up to look him in the eye, "I'm not willing to risk you leaving again." He licked his lips, closing his eyes as he turned his face away from her. And it was the strangest thing to her. He never looked like this, defeated. Especially at a time like this when he'd just gotten what he'd wanted for so long. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. "Tristan." she whispered quietly, resting her forehead against his, "Don't do this. Not now." He finally looked down at her, sighing tiredly as one of his hands cupped the side of her face, the other going to rest on her hip. Rory smiled, biting her bottom lip as he leaned down to capture her in a sudden, searing kiss. He forced her mouth open immediately and the hand on her hip ground her center against his. Possessive was the only word that passed through her mind as she gasped, clenching the back of his shirt as a wave of heat rocked her body.

They slowly broke apart, lingering in between each other for a moment. Tristan sighed, a silent apology in his breath as his hand ran through her hair from her scalp to the tips. Rory closed her eyes, feeling her hair slide through his fingers. "God, I missed you." he whispered, wrapping a lock of her hair loosely around one of his fingers. She smiled, looking up at him wordlessly, but at the same time her warm expression said more than her words ever could have as she trailed her fingers over his jawline lightly, her eyes never leaving his. He groaned, resting his forehead against hers, "I missed you."

-

_**I wanted **_

_**I wanted you to stay **_

_**Cause I needed **_

_**I need to hear you say **_

_**That I love you **_

_**I have loved you all along **_

_**And I forgive you **_

_**For being away for far too long **_

_**So keep breathing **_

_**Cause I'm not leaving you anymore**_

-

_A/N: Yea, I know, you want to kill me, but come on people, who doesn't love a good secret love story? Exactly, no one. And yes, it's just a short filler, but this fic needed one after the last chapter, and also the whole issue with Tristan not being sure if Rory really likes Adam or not needed to get out there, so don't hate me too much. Hopefully since I'm on break the next chapter won't take ten years to get up._


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